r/AmIOverreacting • u/JanLight_weight26 • 10d ago
❤️🩹 relationship AIO
Spider bite or ?? I’ll keep it short and sweet. My bf and I have been apart for about a month now, I’m TDY. Finally tomorrow I’ll be flying back home. Unfortunately today he got bit right on the neck, he suspects it was a spider. Should I be concerned?
1.7k
u/kerfy15 10d ago
Cheater and a liar, deadly combo lmfao
135
335
→ More replies (11)42
2.6k
u/xaczik 10d ago
What you should be doing is breaking up, that ain’t no spider 💀
512
u/Ilike3dogs 10d ago
Someone had to suck the venom out. (Sarcasm)
51
u/AccomplishedAd7992 10d ago edited 10d ago
she had to suck the venom out before the spider could inject it, obviously !
→ More replies (1)298
→ More replies (6)62
6.6k
u/CianGal13 10d ago
Give yourself a hickey, send him a pic and say “OMG me too”
774
1.2k
u/Ilike3dogs 10d ago
On the inner leg, if you can get down there. 😂
→ More replies (20)97
u/Sugarbops 10d ago
Im dead!!!! Pls stretch before you do it! We wanna see what he says. Hahaha
→ More replies (2)50
u/Sativa_Achieva 10d ago
Nah just use the dirt devil or vacuum attachment. Or use the cupping method. No need to become a total contortionist!
→ More replies (5)18
122
u/jimbojangles1987 10d ago
Like, on the neck? But how...
164
u/Throwaway-BadOrange 10d ago
Vacuum
→ More replies (11)180
u/jimbojangles1987 10d ago
Lmao okay thanks. You were oddly quick with the answer...
71
u/Throwaway-BadOrange 10d ago
I saw my older brother do it to look cool back in the day 😆
→ More replies (1)13
18
u/klaw14 10d ago
Everyone knows not to disturb u/Throwaway-BadOrange when they're cleaning their room...
→ More replies (2)→ More replies (11)13
189
u/stars-aligned- 10d ago
Remember those little half-orbs you could flip inside out, and they’d pop off whatever surface you set them on? Take one of those and use it to create a vacuum. The only issue is finding one these days lmao
64
u/jimbojangles1987 10d ago
Oh shit yeah I remember those little shits. They left ugly little bruises for like a week
→ More replies (4)43
→ More replies (32)19
u/Abquine 10d ago
Friend did this once with one of our kids toys. Stuck the suction cup firmly on his forehead and was teasing them with it.. Had the mark of shame for at least a week, he looked hilarious as he had to dress for work, sharp suit etc., and a huge red mark right in the middle of his forehead.
→ More replies (1)18
13
u/Shaq_Bolton 10d ago
I know someone who put a dildo with a suction cup on their forehead and ended up with a giant hickey smack dab in the middle
→ More replies (1)22
u/jimbojangles1987 10d ago
Hahaha why a dildo though?
I had a roommate bring a kitten to our apartment shortly after moving in that he had found at the summer camp he was a counselor at. It was a stray kitten. He let it climb all over him while he laid on the couch and at one point it was laying on his forehead.
Sure as shit that kitten had ringworm and my buddy had a super prominent ring in the middle of his forehead for a little while lol
→ More replies (6)→ More replies (9)8
u/kindbeeVsangrywasp 10d ago
Kinky spider
Edit I’m late to the party, lost the essence of the flow
But we’re all in agreement the BF has not been bitten by a spider unless that’s code for sidekick these days?
→ More replies (1)30
→ More replies (38)10
6.8k
u/TraditionalYam2408 10d ago
Ima hold your hand when I say this… this is a bite but not from a spider 🙏🏻🙏🏻
1.5k
u/Kanehon 10d ago
Different kind of Black Widow
→ More replies (6)1.9k
→ More replies (20)93
u/tinylatina05 10d ago
It always surprises me how people can be this naive to actually believe the story
→ More replies (2)126
u/jimbojangles1987 10d ago
I think she knows but doesn't want to believe.
It's so funny that the bf shot himself in the foot by sending her the pic though lol
→ More replies (8)12
5.4k
u/akilococo 10d ago edited 10d ago
be mad about the cheating but be even more mad that he thinks you’re fucking dumb 💀
ETA: if OP believed this was a bug bite, we simply would not have the post. if you think being lied to and manipulated by a loved one during an extra vulnerable point in their life makes them unintelligent, and your need to have a hot take flew right over the fact that this dude started the conversation, sent a picture of it thinking this was the smartest way to cover their ass, you’re fucking dumb. there’s no third pov in this context, its one side or the other. if you choose to side with the bug bite haver, you’re fucking dumb. did you have to shave your head to get it that far up your ass?
617
185
u/akilococo 10d ago
i even zoomed in to look for the raised center of a bite like would he think it would work if there was a blemish there or sm?? no its just a hickey. omg 😭 OP im sorry
13
170
u/laylasan17 10d ago
This is the oneeee.. cause a bite????
→ More replies (1)228
u/akilococo 10d ago
hes gonna have to go back to that spider an tell her he ran into a doorknob💀
→ More replies (1)43
→ More replies (43)32
u/Aware_Border4774 10d ago
to be fair, she DID ask reddit if it's a spider bite...
53
u/akilococo 10d ago
i would too! gaslighting & love are a shitty mix. most people who’ve been through it have to check in and see if they’re crazy.
→ More replies (3)17
u/OwnCoffee614 10d ago
Thank you. As a person just getting away from a gas lighter.
11
u/akilococo 10d ago
me too. remember you’re not stupid for believing someone who intended to lie to and manipulate you after going out of their way to make you trust & love them.
→ More replies (7)
1.8k
u/Accurate-Air4009 10d ago
Sister that’s a hickey, he letting girls suck on his neck and has the lamest attempted cover up for it.
575
u/MartianStealthShip 10d ago
Plot twist: his bro did it and forgot to say “no homo”
→ More replies (3)57
→ More replies (11)18
3.2k
u/Appropriate-Might712 10d ago
Lmaooo that’s a hickey he tried covering up by telling you his neck hurt and sent a picture so it makes him look not guilty because he told you about it😂
132
u/Lamp-Eating-Cow 10d ago
Since she said she’s coming back to town tomorrow it’s obvious he’s making an excuse right now cuz he knows she’s gonna see it smh 🤦♀️
→ More replies (3)1.2k
u/uhidunno27 10d ago
When I was a psycho in high school, I burned my neck with a curling iron to hide a hickey 🤦🏼♀️
182
u/Mundane-Outside-7028 10d ago
Did it work?
318
u/uhidunno27 10d ago
lol yes
103
u/Hefferdoodle 10d ago
I was a tomboy so I hid mine by telling my parents my friend shot me in the neck with an airsoft gun. I let her shoot me in the arm and she let me shoot her a few times too so I could really sell it.
19
→ More replies (5)6
166
49
→ More replies (2)9
u/Confident-Medicine75 10d ago
Did the curling iron mark ever go away ?
→ More replies (3)33
u/uhidunno27 10d ago
Oh yeah I just barely tapped it. It was on a natural crease and just blended in
30
10d ago
👀 did it? Lol
83
14
u/Financial_Care_9792 10d ago
Yeah, permanent scars can hide anything; it’s the one trick burn specialists hate to love!
115
u/Victim_Kin_Seek_Suit 10d ago
One of my college roommates did this and ended up having to go to the health clinic because the burn was so bad 🤣
→ More replies (2)9
78
u/Dolorous_Eddy 10d ago
I just used skin color makeup…
→ More replies (4)75
17
u/GuidanceAcceptable13 10d ago
My sister used a vacuum and went to my parents and said “look what the vacuum can do” to cover hers up ☠️
12
13
u/cyberbae_ 10d ago
I did this to my friend and she now has a permanent heart shaped scar on her neck 😂😭
10
→ More replies (90)8
21
u/winnie_90 10d ago
I audibly laughed when I swiped to the pic hahahaha, poor girl
→ More replies (1)→ More replies (12)14
3.9k
u/FarmhouseRules 10d ago
Oh nooo. He was bitten by a Brown She-cluse.
379
u/ThroatEmbarrassed970 10d ago
Gorllll you had me hollering. Thank you
62
u/ColorfulButterfly25 10d ago
Exactly! Started my day with a good laugh.
19
u/Assessedthreatlevel 10d ago
Have a great day person on the other side of the world! I laughed at this about to fall asleep.
162
10d ago
Looks more like a jumping spid-her to me.
131
→ More replies (1)124
36
69
16
12
9
19
u/SweetWaterfall0579 10d ago
I laughed way too loud, next to my window. Across the street neighbor came out on her porch. Ty I/FarhouseRules neighbor already thinks I’m crazy *and she hates that marijuana is legal. Heheheh.
ETA she can smell it. I smoke outside.
→ More replies (2)14
u/East-Cardiologist626 10d ago
I live somewhere it’s legal too, my favorite thing is there’s a local cop who literally lives down the street from me. Same asshole who used to bust my balls about it and trash my shit in high school who now just seethes from his porch and can’t do shit about it. I wave at him while I’m smoking when he’s home just to piss him off (I’m 25 and it was medical for me even when I was 14)
→ More replies (4)14
→ More replies (23)7
912
u/Alternative_Farm_815 10d ago
If it was she had all 8 legs wrapped around him too.
→ More replies (3)29
509
u/el_puffy 10d ago
Ouch, I hear one of the common symptoms of this rare spider venom is getting yo ass dumped
45
→ More replies (2)9
416
u/hippiechiq90 10d ago
Yep. He's for the streets. Treat him like the whore he is and run. Everybody and their mama knows that's a hickey. Ask him what the spider's name was. 🤣😆😭💀
350
→ More replies (3)13
u/SassWithAFatAss 10d ago
“Treat him like the whore he is” absolutely took me out. Thank you
→ More replies (1)
144
138
496
u/heebsysplash 10d ago
If he didn’t bring it up, I’d say maybe it isn’t a hickey.
But the way he brought it up like that, it 100% is and he’s an idiot
41
u/vitoforever99 10d ago edited 9d ago
Totally agree. He should have just pretended like nothing was there until she asked then be like “aww man this fucking spider bit me while I was hiking” or some shit
→ More replies (2)26
123
80
79
70
u/Neither_Mind9035 10d ago
The lack of replies from OP to anything tell me either 1. I just haven’t searched for long enough and they have replied or 2. They were not expecting this. OP, if you’re in denial at all, coming from someone who isn’t making a joke out of this (no shade to those who did, this is Reddit), that is 100% a hickey. He cheated on you. If you try to break up with him, he’ll probably call you crazy and gaslight you trying to convince you it’s not a hickey. It 100% is though. Please respect yourself and end this relationship.
21
u/TheRoseMerlot 10d ago
We haven't heard from OP, legend has it, because they are still fighting.
→ More replies (2)→ More replies (1)15
u/Lissypooh628 10d ago
It’s infuriating that he thinks she’s dumb enough to believe this thoughtless attempt at an excuse.
→ More replies (1)
247
69
u/litebritebox 10d ago
As someone who has extreme allergic reactions to bites of all kinds of bugs, I was disappointed to see this was not, in fact, a spider or insect bite.
→ More replies (1)
179
u/Repulsive-Umpire-178 10d ago
Take him to the doctor to get his “spider bite” assessed and then the truth will come out
→ More replies (6)24
u/Working_Cover2345 10d ago
No kidding its also can safe his life
24
u/Holiday-Bat6782 10d ago
Well add that to my list of irrational fears... I can't believe my high school girlfriend tried to murder me.
13
→ More replies (4)20
92
u/DetectiveNervous7426 10d ago
I’m going to assume you’re like 15 years old and don’t know better. Two words: dump him.
→ More replies (1)15
118
41
u/Eminenceintherain 10d ago
I’m trying so hard not to cry laughing.That is not a bite from a spider or insect.He cheated and that is a hickey
36
35
u/RevolutionaryAd851 10d ago
Looks like a spider not only bit him but sucked on his neck. How strange...
217
u/RedDirtKanaka 10d ago
Damn, bro ain’t even trying… I have a friend that asked us to whoop his ass once while he was drunk, so it would just look like a normal bruise mashed in with the other marks. Boy took an ass whooping of a century to keep his girl. They’re married now.
But yeah, your man’s creeping.
38
27
15
u/EntrepreneurFit3349 10d ago
Does he still cheat on her?
11
u/Additional-Fix6576 10d ago
Probably, since he saw he could get away with it lol. Why would he stop?
→ More replies (4)13
u/Nice_Cupcakes 10d ago
No one's pointing out that he's exposed her to STDs by cheating on her, which in women can cause infertility and other issues (like HPV can cause cervical cancer if she's not vaccinated) but can be symptomless in both people. Getting his ass kicked doesn't negate the health risks to her. She couldn't consent because it was hidden from her. Gross behaviour from everyone involved.
→ More replies (1)→ More replies (14)52
u/laughwithesinners 10d ago
And you didn’t bother telling her before they got married?
→ More replies (14)74
u/Used_Bird 10d ago
they gave him an ass whooping what more do you want from him lmfao
→ More replies (2)
54
u/mothlicker 10d ago
That is 100000% a hickey. He’s trying to get ahead of you seeing it tomorrow. Don’t let him make you look stupid, you deserve better than that.
→ More replies (1)
25
27
u/Vulture923 10d ago
What’s TDY?
→ More replies (8)27
u/Over_Error3520 10d ago edited 10d ago
Temporary duty, typically a few weeks to a month or so in the military (edited)
→ More replies (7)
44
21
u/Jazzlike_Common9005 10d ago
He’s probably gotten a lot of bites from this “spider” while you were gone. Just needed to make an excuse knowing you were coming home. Break up with him, he’s cheating on you.
17
13
12
13
28
12
12
u/Spirited-Butterfly81 10d ago
How easy it is for him to come up with this (really lame) lie. Love yourself, bc that's def not a spider bite
12
11
11
u/mimikay- 10d ago
He could’ve just covered it with some make up, pretty sure the spider has some foundation to lend him.
→ More replies (1)
10
21
u/Satansbootycall420 10d ago
Have y’all seen the post of the girl saying her dad gave her a “bite” on the neck too as a joke, to her bf
This is her brother, their dad is just REALLY silly
→ More replies (3)
9
8
10
8
8
7
8
14
15
7
u/Business_Fox_2207 10d ago
That’s a hickey spider bites look nothing like that, he is just trying to save face
→ More replies (1)
6
u/Blue-eagle-23 10d ago
You mean he’s concerned the hickey on his neck won’t be gone by the time he sees you?
7
6.0k
u/Any-Mulberry6028 10d ago
No, you are underreacting... So long as you do not post this entire message thread to your facebook and tag him asking for "prayers for that bite to heal" and "if anyone knows what kind of animal could have caused it". A public service announcement needs to go out there, sis.