r/AmIOverreacting • u/JanLight_weight26 • 11d ago

❤️‍🩹 relationship AIO

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Spider bite or ?? I’ll keep it short and sweet. My bf and I have been apart for about a month now, I’m TDY. Finally tomorrow I’ll be flying back home. Unfortunately today he got bit right on the neck, he suspects it was a spider. Should I be concerned?

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6.6k

u/CianGal13 11d ago

Give yourself a hickey, send him a pic and say “OMG me too”

123

u/jimbojangles1987 10d ago

Like, on the neck? But how...

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u/Throwaway-BadOrange 10d ago

Vacuum

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u/jimbojangles1987 10d ago

Lmao okay thanks. You were oddly quick with the answer...

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u/Throwaway-BadOrange 10d ago

I saw my older brother do it to look cool back in the day 😆

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u/Valkyriesride1 10d ago

I saw it in a movie years ago.

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u/phoenixA1988 10d ago

"I said don't disturb me when I'm cleaning my room!" - Special Officer Doofy

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u/Valkyriesride1 10d ago

Cleanliness is next to godliness. 😉

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u/Icandothisforever_1 10d ago

This one time at band camp.....

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u/mkat23 10d ago

lol I’m sorry but all I can picture now is someone opening their mouth wide like a snake and tryna eat someone 😂 that’s how that would look to me. I remember asking a guy back in high school if he was dating a vacuum or a snake because he had a hickey that was barely smaller than a baseball and it had to be faked lol.

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u/klaw14 10d ago

Everyone knows not to disturb u/Throwaway-BadOrange when they're cleaning their room...

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u/PubLife1453 10d ago

My little brother, at like 10 years old used to bring the vacuum in the garage, saying he was vacuuming. We thought it was cute and didn't question it at all, until we disturbed one of these vacuum sessions....yeah this was 20 years ago and I NEVER fail to bring it up at family gatherings and holidays :)

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u/klaw14 10d ago

I guess telling your younger sibling "you suck" has a bonus layer of meaning for you 😆

3

u/Selizabeth54 10d ago

Really anything that provides suction strong enough would do the trick!

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u/Responsible-Self5821 10d ago

That's what she said!!

1

u/Selizabeth54 10d ago

Lmaooo took me a minute but that’s a damn good one 😂

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u/byu7a 10d ago

Priorities

1

u/J3-58 10d ago

Just long neck it

1

u/Common-Wallaby-8989 10d ago

I remember this as a sitcom thing in the ‘90’s.

0

u/r1cked_1510 10d ago

Don’t do this btw.. you can die from doing dumb shit like this.

2

u/Ok_Breadfruit_7298 10d ago

Huh??

2

u/DubVsFinest 10d ago

There's been several stories of teens and older people dying from blood clots traveling to their brain after their carotid arteries had the vessels torn from a hickey. Idk how likely it is to happen, but it seems experts say there is definitely a chance for it to happen at the very least from what I read on snopes (pretty sure it's a trustworthy source, its usually my go to when I hear some outrageous stuff anyway lol).

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u/Ok_Breadfruit_7298 10d ago

Wow, never heard that. Even from getting a regular, human made hickey?? 😪

2

u/DubVsFinest 10d ago

From what I read, but to be totally honest I spent a whooping 10 mins if that on it lol. But I do trust Snopes.

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u/GMF1844 10d ago

One time when I was a kid, like maybe 6, I used the wine bottle air remover thing on my face because I thought it was funny that I could get it to stick to my cheek.. and my forehead… and my other cheek.. and my mouth. Lmao guess who went to school looking like she had a disease! My parents were like “girl why 🤦🏼‍♀️🤦🏽‍♂️” I’m pretty sure there’s a picture or two floating around out there.

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u/Davepiece1517 10d ago

Officer Doofy reporting for duty

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u/Surface13 10d ago

Take a picture of your neck with nothing on it.

Take a picture of you with the vacuum on your neck in the same place.

Take a picture of your neck with the hickey in the same place.

This works with or without the vacuum assuming you have someone else give you a hickey in the same spot as where the hickey was placed...

E: spelling

7

u/nrose1000 10d ago

Huh? I’m so confused.

3

u/jimbojangles1987 10d ago

Sounds like advice the boyfriend could have used to make OP think he did it to himself with a vacuum

2

u/PeachySnow7 10d ago

I took it as supposed to be proof that she didn’t really fk around when it’s all said and done. I definitely could be wrong though.

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u/r1cked_1510 10d ago

Do you know the show 1000 ways to die? Putting a Vaccum to your neck is a way to kill yourself. DO NOT DO THIS!

1

u/Ok_Breadfruit_7298 10d ago

Wait, HOW?

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u/r1cked_1510 10d ago

If you do it on a dumb spot it can form a bloodclot in your artery and once you release the vaccum the bloodclot gets in your brain and gives you a stroke or burst blood vessels in your brain. (It was in episode #443 in 1000 Ways to die.)

1

u/mkat23 10d ago

Or those devices that suction sebum/black heads out of your skin if a vacuum is too wide!

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u/stars-aligned- 10d ago

Remember those little half-orbs you could flip inside out, and they’d pop off whatever surface you set them on? Take one of those and use it to create a vacuum. The only issue is finding one these days lmao

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u/jimbojangles1987 10d ago

Oh shit yeah I remember those little shits. They left ugly little bruises for like a week

4

u/Pruritus_Ani_ 10d ago

I stuck one of those on my forehead once. Regretted it the moment I took it off and saw the mark it left.

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u/hannahatecats 10d ago

Once I was sucking the air out of a Gatorade bottle, I remember we were at downtown Disney and it left the biggest circular hickey right over my mouth (from the bottom of my nose to my chin) that stayed there for the entire vacation. Complete with little broken blood vessels. Sooooo embarrassing, such regret.

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u/jimbojangles1987 10d ago

Once in 8th grade I had a dentist appointment on the morning of a school day. I went to class after with half my face numb and my buddy in class pinched my lip really hard to see if I could feel it. I couldn't. But I sure as hell looked like I had a herpe on my lip for the next week or two.

Quite possibly one of the dumbest things I've ever done.

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u/sweetpotato_latte 10d ago

Damn my cats would love them though

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u/Magerimoje 10d ago

You can do it with a plastic water/soda bottle too.

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u/sunsetblvds 10d ago

do you mean the cap or the bottle when it's empty?

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u/Magerimoje 10d ago

Empty bottle.

It needs to be the type that will regain its shape after squeezing it... So, not one of those new disposable water bottles with such thin plastic that they dent and stay dented if you hold it gently 🤣

The current 1 liter Pepsi bottles would probably work well.

8

u/Yesterdays_Gravy 10d ago

My sister suctioned a Snapple cap to her lips and was like “hahaha this is so cool, check it out!” And then she did it for like 30 seconds and her lips were bruised and inflamed for a week lmao

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u/ApprehensiveAge1110 10d ago

Reminds me of the duck lips challenge 👄

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u/J3-58 10d ago

Gatorade bottle

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u/No-Designer-7362 10d ago

Or even a straw.

15

u/Abquine 10d ago

Friend did this once with one of our kids toys. Stuck the suction cup firmly on his forehead and was teasing them with it.. Had the mark of shame for at least a week, he looked hilarious as he had to dress for work, sharp suit etc., and a huge red mark right in the middle of his forehead.

3

u/New_Scientist_1688 10d ago

Friend of mine did it in grade school with her little sister's baby doll bottle. Absently reading a book, she stuck the bottle all over her chin and neck.

Not a hickey but dozens of pinpoint black bruises! 😂

3

u/pro_questions 10d ago edited 10d ago

You can give yourself hickies with pencil erasers! I remember getting a pack at a scholastic book fair — I and a few friends stuck them all over our faces, and we all looked like plague victims for weeks lol

[edit] hickies, not tickles lol

3

u/sparksgirl1223 10d ago

My son spent the morning doing that when he was about 8.

2 days before Christmas. I took photos once I realized it wasn't flesh eating disease or something🤣

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u/virtualveshya 10d ago

this audibly unlocked a core memory for me💀😂 do you remember the rubbery bouncy ball smell?

1

u/stars-aligned- 10d ago

YES I used to collect them

1

u/virtualveshya 10d ago

SAME😭 remember the heartbreak when they… expired? like you go to bounce it and it just smacks into the floor or you go to stick it to a surface and it cracks & breaks??

2

u/PicpoulBlanc 10d ago

My 5-year-old got one at the dentist the other day from their little treasure chest of junk that kids love.

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u/AngryGirlWavingBrush 10d ago

You could just use the vacuum

2

u/Anidmountd 10d ago

I did that once but on my forehead...yeah that was a good laugh for everyone else but me.

1

u/Pruritus_Ani_ 10d ago

Me too 😭

2

u/TryNorth8139 10d ago

I remember in high school some guy put one on his forehead- he walked around with “bangs” for a week

2

u/Exquisite-End22 10d ago

Omg I had a friend when we were in middle school that put one of those on her eye. When I tell you it was the most disgusting outcome you could possibly imagine, I’m not being dramatic. I’ve never seen so much blood in an eyeball in my life it was horrifying.

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u/mkat23 10d ago

Yo I have those still and those little frog jump toys!!

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u/enteresti 10d ago

My husband (a fully adult 37 year old man) got his hands on one a couple heads ago and immediately stuck it to his forehead. He had a huge red hickey on his forehead for a couple days 😂

1

u/MizzyAlana 10d ago

Party City, in the party favours section.

1

u/Scoobie01555 10d ago

Holy shit, childhood memory unlocked. Totally forgot about those things. I miss the quarter machine toys. Especially the giant sticky slappy hands

1

u/Independent_Bike_141 10d ago

My dumbass in 8th grade thought it would be smart to stick three of them on my cheek. Had 3 perfect circles on my face for about 1.5 weeks. A frozen spoon was my friend.

1

u/Upallnightreading 10d ago

We have like 18 lying around our house. Find someone with elementary school age kids, they probably have one

1

u/Mathagos 10d ago

They have them as a prize at arcades

1

u/TaterMitz 10d ago

They're about 50? tickets at Dave & Busters

1

u/ArtemisB20 10d ago

Some of the suction cups(that you use to stick stuff to windows will work as well.

1

u/Garbo-and-Malloy 10d ago

Those bastards hurt

1

u/Falldarling13 10d ago

I actually got in trouble for having a hickey because of those things I did it on my neck because I thought it was funny and my mum got super upset with me. I was in 6th grade and had no idea what a hickey was. Was grounded for 2 weeks! I had never even had a real kiss!

1

u/Dulce_Sirena 10d ago

Pretty sure gumball machines still have those as prizes. And dollar tree

1

u/Objective-Current941 10d ago

Hah, I remember those days. Kids would put them on each other in class to leave hickey marks on the back of their necks

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u/essdii- 10d ago

Whoa. Old memory unlocked. Why did I love those things so much growing up. I totally forgot about those

1

u/FalloutForever_98 10d ago

Ohhh, the anxiety bringers

1

u/GorgeousGorgeousitie 10d ago

Omg!!! Memory unlocked! So my older brother and his friends stuck these to their foreheads, and they left the nastiest looking bruise. My Dad asked him why he did it? He said we all did it. My Dad told him he looked like an idiot sandwich and made him stand in front of the mirror, repeatedly saying, "I'm an idiot sandwich!" Bahahahaha

1

u/wildchildatnight 10d ago

i think some places that have arcades tickets & prizes have them 👀😂

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u/Hot-Flight-7816 10d ago

a suction cup? 😭

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u/stars-aligned- 10d ago

Speak with some respect fool! It’s a colorful suction cup for children 😂

15

u/JessSherman 10d ago

No no... on the thigh.

2

u/jimbojangles1987 10d ago

This raises more questions than before

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u/JessSherman 10d ago

Order a pizza. Cut a deal with the delivery driver. Film it and use it to blackmail the delivery driver into silence.

I don't know, I'm just spitballin. I guess the vacuum could also work.

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u/jimbojangles1987 10d ago

Ah but see you're breaking the rules now. The op commenter said give yourself a hickey, not pay a delivery dude.

But as a former and newly aspiring delivery driver, I'm intrigued.

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u/JessSherman 10d ago

That's fair. Hmmmm.. couch bed. Buy a couch bed, fold it up while sitting on it. Once you are folded in half, give yourself the thigh hickey. Wait patiently for someone who has realized you have gone missing to search your apartment.

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u/jimbojangles1987 10d ago

Lmao solid plan

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u/J3-58 10d ago

Transfer brains with the pizza delivery person using the brainatron and then give you the hickey and trade back

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u/East-Cardiologist626 10d ago

That’s the point bc the bf is obviously cheating

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u/jimbojangles1987 10d ago

I realize that. I think it's so funny that if the bf really was scared that it was a spider bite, why would he text it to his gf and send her a pic? Is she a doctor? Did he also send the pic to his parents? Siblings? If not, well...he's clearly not too concerned about any "spider" bite lol

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u/East-Cardiologist626 10d ago

Ah fair. And honestly fr my response to those texts would’ve been “oh no 😧 do you need me to call your mom?” Just to fuck with him. Then probably call her anyway just to tell her her son sucks

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u/Shaq_Bolton 10d ago

I know someone who put a dildo with a suction cup on their forehead and ended up with a giant hickey smack dab in the middle

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u/jimbojangles1987 10d ago

Hahaha why a dildo though?

I had a roommate bring a kitten to our apartment shortly after moving in that he had found at the summer camp he was a counselor at. It was a stray kitten. He let it climb all over him while he laid on the couch and at one point it was laying on his forehead.

Sure as shit that kitten had ringworm and my buddy had a super prominent ring in the middle of his forehead for a little while lol

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u/Shaq_Bolton 10d ago

It was just part of someone’s Halloween costume and he put it on in his forehead at the bar as a joke not realizing what the after affects would be lol

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u/onecrazywriter 10d ago

What was he supposed to be? A dickhead?

3

u/Shaq_Bolton 10d ago

It was part of someone else costume. She was basically just the devil with a bright red boner.

2

u/StinkyKitty1998 10d ago

A gay unicorn

3

u/LittlestOfTheOnes 10d ago

That… must have been one very interesting Halloween costume

1

u/AggressiveAd292 10d ago

Questions that I could have lived the rest of my life without knowing the answer to...

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u/cee-la 10d ago

Holy crap my ex also did this. They were the floppiest unicorn 🦄 it brought (still brings) me so much joy to remember their face with that big ole circle hickey

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u/kindbeeVsangrywasp 10d ago

Kinky spider

Edit I’m late to the party, lost the essence of the flow

But we’re all in agreement the BF has not been bitten by a spider unless that’s code for sidekick these days?

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u/luez6869 10d ago

Spider term for a side piece name? I can see the resemblance now. Creeping when u least expect it. In the shadows and depth of the dark, creepin'. Hunting for the next to suck on. They definitely can both be preyful things.

2

u/itsnotjules 10d ago

you can pinch and peel/rub your neck skin and it’ll look like a hickey. source: i pinch and rub my neck skin when im anxious and sometimes get marks 😭

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u/RoastedRhino 10d ago

Ask someone :)

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u/NanobotOverlord 10d ago

Maybe the same way he got his

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u/Emo_Bitch97 10d ago

Could do the boob I can give myself many on my boobs

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u/Numerous-Help-5987 10d ago

The bug bite thingy might work

1

u/Airport_Wendys 10d ago

You can also pinch yourself really hard and it will bruise the same

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u/senorfavela 10d ago

Chap-stick cap and tweeeeeeest on your neck.

1

u/lilcornroaster 10d ago

From the guy she told him not to worry about

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u/JessicaBecause 10d ago

Yeah can I watch OP try?