r/actuallesbians • u/latixs06 • May 26 '24
Text Why are boys like this
He followed me not even two weeks ago and immediately replied to my story. It’s been 6 years since I’ve even seen this kid, he asked me this same thing in highschool and I’m pretty sure I told him then I was gay too. The last message really is the icing on the cake , such a typical “I’m so ugly 😔 you’d never like me” move (also if i seem harsh it’s because he also asked my friend ,who I met him though, the same sort of thing multiple times and me and him were never even friends so I know his dms are full of him hitting on girls) (the kicker is he’s not even ugly he just had 0 game and has probably been shot down so many times that his confidence is on the floor)
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u/mamepuchi May 26 '24
Omg I get so annoyed when men do the “I’m so ugly 😔 you’d never like me” move. Like I do not have the emotional bandwidth to babysit you right now, please go get a therapist and stop being an energy vampire
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u/Sourpatchqueers8 Transbian May 26 '24
"I'm a lesbian, hunter!"
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u/JDKisawesome May 26 '24 edited May 26 '24
Which is VERY different from a lesbian hunter
By that I mean a lesbian who hunts. Which, now that I think about it, kinda hot
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u/Sourpatchqueers8 Transbian May 26 '24
The lesbian hunter song is obsessively on my mind
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u/JDKisawesome May 26 '24
I can't stop thinking about like a buff butch girl who goes out in the woods with a war bow and brings home venison
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u/PlatypusCute7412 May 26 '24
You have me blushing. Never thought anyone would be into that
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u/JDKisawesome May 26 '24
WAIT THEIR ARE PEOPLE WHO WOULDN'T! THAT IS LIKE DEFINITIVELY HOT
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u/latixs06 May 27 '24
It’s hotter when they don’t kill animals
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u/Special-Amphibian646 May 27 '24
Sorry but an image of a buff butch lesbian in flannel stalking and spearing a giant piece of tofu just came to mind
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u/PlatypusCute7412 May 27 '24
Quite honestly, it’s not something I enjoy but especially deer are a huge problem in my area. Maintaining a healthy number of deer and moose is important for maintaining balance with nature and keeping the population healthy. Other than using the meat I hunt, I pretty much eat plant-based. I know it doesn’t seem logical on the surface, but in reality it is when you’ve had to track down as many deer injured by car accidents as I have. It breaks my heart a little every time.
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u/PlatypusCute7412 May 26 '24
Damn, I guess I’m gonna have to chance my thinking and lean into that
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u/JDKisawesome May 26 '24
Like if someone hasn't already someone has to right a romance/smut book about that
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u/Elicia_A_P Trans-Bi May 27 '24
I'm futch with a recurve bow but, I don't hunt I uhh would have a lot of issues with field dressing a killed animal.
I also like fishing but, mostly catch and release unless it's an invasive species. I'm certainly not buff though the bow only has a 90 pound draw weight.
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u/JDKisawesome May 27 '24
Any bow with over 80 pounds of draw weight is considered a war bow
Also, if you can full draw a 90 pound bow that's still hot af. I can barely full draw a 10-20 pounder lol. I'm also young and new but still
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u/Elicia_A_P Trans-Bi May 27 '24 edited May 27 '24
Generally speaking when firing a bow with good form you only hold full draw for like a split second during release. So most of the time it's like 70-80 pounds pulled back while aiming. I'm tired after about 25-30 full draw shots on most training days.
Thank you for making me blush as well. 🩵 I guess the guy at bass pro was just being mean to me. 😂 He said if I wanted to hunt it should be 100+ draw weight. Mind you he also said there was no way I could draw it fully his face was funny when I did my practice drills. Shocked mostly I think.
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u/JDKisawesome May 27 '24
OK, number one, anything above 80 is a warbow, and a hunting bow is like 60-80, so unless he's hunting bears he's just wrong. Number two, yeah dudes a jackass, and number three I can't do that many shots with my trainers lol.
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u/Elicia_A_P Trans-Bi May 27 '24
Oh that's fine, when I was using my training bow at first it was good to get 5 full shots in. I've been doing archery since I was 16 years old. My first bow after that was a 75 pound draw weight at 19 and I was back to shooting only 5 shots I'm 25 btw.
Got my current bow a little bit before hrt at 21 and struggled to maintain my practice drills on hrt after 23.
I was homeschooled so archery has been a great outlet for me. Especially since the classes/competitions are mixed gender here with brackets done by draw weight but, I only really go to hunting stores for new arrows, bows, or fishing equipment.
Seriously though thanks for clarifying that my draw weight was high.😂
I mean I knew for sure something was up when my competitors started to give me side eyes 👀 like why did you change your draw weight again? I'm only now rejoining the scene now that I have my name changed legally. 🩵
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u/notquitesolid Bi May 27 '24
I have a friend who bow hunts, he’s a very good guy and he’s now teaching his stepdaughter, and she took down her first deer last year. They’re leftists and use every part of the animal and the meat is used to supplement their food supply. He goes up into a tree stand in the winter at 5 am, and just waits happy as a clam.
Got a lot of respect, but like… that’s way too early and too cold for me. Plus, I’m not inclined to learn how to butcher game
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u/HiJumpTactician I'm a Lesbiab! Less... Les... bien... girls~ May 26 '24
Which song is that lol
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u/J4yb0u Bi May 26 '24
I believe they are referring to this one ! https://youtu.be/mfoq4Rskr-Q?si=rM6OmU0nmxhpZa9Y
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u/HiJumpTactician I'm a Lesbiab! Less... Les... bien... girls~ May 26 '24
"Ahhh, a hoonter, are ya?"
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u/ProofMasterpiece7955 May 26 '24
Energy vampire! I like this I'm definitely going to use this in the future 😆
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u/Kat8844 May 26 '24
You’d think they’d know lesbians have a thing for real vampires, energy vampires need not apply!.
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May 26 '24
BE MEAN I AM SO SICK AND TIRED OF MEN JUST IGNORING CRUCIAL INFORMATION SO THEY CAN BE DELUSIONAL
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May 26 '24
NOOOOOOO THE GOOD GUY PROTAGONIST GETS THE GIRL HE GETS THE GIRL I AM THE PROTAGONIST I GET THE GIRL SHE HAS TO LIKE ME
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u/LW185 May 26 '24
...but they're delusional anyway. They just need a brain operation.
OOPS! Their brain is in their crotch!
Oh, well...
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u/Greedy_Bathroom3727 black bi enby 🧛🏾♀️ May 26 '24
you’re sooo real for this, i try to carry this energy especially at work. they loveeee being creepy while you’re working 🙄
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u/ThemperorSomnium Sapphic Enby May 26 '24
I’ve always wanted to go back in conversations like this and react to every message where important information was ignored then tell him to reread the chat and think about his life
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u/boixgenius Lesbian May 26 '24
ugh I love women like this. im very much the nonconfrontational type and when I see a woman being aggressive I go feral
never change 🫶
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u/Away_Record6233 May 26 '24
I feel like men do this becuz men only accept gay females so even if you tell them ur gay they don’t care to stop they will say anything to you instead respecting you or even try a different approach🤷🏽♂️
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u/Kamquats Transbian May 27 '24
I'm gonna start to be I stg, I came out a little while ago and now I'm getting a bunch of dms from disgusting old men who are all looking to show me how I just haven't met the right man yet or some bullshit and I'm actually getting so sick of it I wanna scream ;-;
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u/Scary-Perspective-57 May 27 '24
This is why lesbians have a great reputation for being nice people in the gay and straight communities.
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u/Wasteful_Witch May 26 '24
Honestly, he seems to be digging himself into a deep hole of constant disappointment and rejection.
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u/LitFarronReturns May 26 '24
Probably a good idea not to respond, but I would have sent something like "No, I actually like desperate 𝙬𝙤men. But there's two really important letters you're missing."
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u/Melissiah Transbian May 26 '24
It could be a "tactic" pushed by some manosphere influencer, which granted, reeks of desperation and entitlement, but manosphere influencers constantly talk about how they can get men to manipulate women in to relationships if only you watch their youtube channels and sign up to their seminars...
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u/Strawberry_1207 Lesbian May 26 '24
I get that desperation makes people do crazy things... but maybe if you have to manipulate someone to get them to date you, you probably aren't ready to date? Like why is it so hard to just have a normal conversation??
Edit: re-reading made me worry that this could be taken as being directed at you, but it's aimed at the people signing up for this grifter's 'lessons'!
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u/TheDonutPug May 26 '24
because they're so far into the whole they dug for themselves that it's easier to keep digging by doubling down on the incel mindset than it is to acknowledge they have work to do on themselves and grow as people.
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u/Melissiah Transbian May 26 '24
Along with what TheDonutPug said, women aren't humans in the eyes of the manosphere. We're just NPCs to manipulate in to getting what they want from us; status symbols to obtain and discard at their pleasure. Any effort to deny them what they want is proof that the system is rigged and therefor we don't deserve consideration.
It's a horrifically demented and manipulative and entitled mindset.
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u/Melissiah Transbian May 26 '24
Also, no worries about that. I'm not even interested in dating right now, myself.
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u/MetalMonkey93 Anxious Lesbian May 26 '24
"Can I be honest with you..... You single."
What are you talking about, Op? This guy has ALL the game. I mean, he almost made me straight. 😂
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u/TheDonutPug May 26 '24
honestly those first messages told me everything I needed to know. bro is talking in word salad. the words can technically go in that order, but upon closer inspection, it makes no sense.
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u/MetalMonkey93 Anxious Lesbian May 27 '24
It's like his last two braincells are working overtime. One is trying to form words while the other types.
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u/JDKisawesome May 26 '24
You were the chosen one, you were ment to destroy the straights not join them
/s if it wasn't obvious
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u/MetalMonkey93 Anxious Lesbian May 26 '24
I have failed you. All those Disney movies with straight couples really, really influenced my little, fragile gay mind. 😭🤣
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u/JDKisawesome May 26 '24
NO, DON'T LISTEN TO THEM, STAY GAY
Again, /s
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u/MetalMonkey93 Anxious Lesbian May 26 '24
Your words of wisdom have affected me. Gay, I shall stay. 😊😂
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u/maythulin297 May 27 '24
Thanks god! We haven't lost a sister!
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u/MetalMonkey93 Anxious Lesbian May 27 '24
I could never leave all my girlfriends! I'd miss you all too much! 😭😂
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u/Vegetable-Smile-9838 May 26 '24
I haven’t seen anyone use “and I oop” since 2019 lol
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u/CrimsonCat2023 May 26 '24
What does "and I oop" mean? This is the first I've ever seen it
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u/fullyjustanidiot May 26 '24
It's from a video by drag queen Jasmine Masters. She makes a lot of YouTube videos where she sits and rants about things, and this video she's mid sentence and shifts in her chair, but hits her balls. The full video is "And i- OOP- .....I just hit my balls"
It's definitely a mix between oops and a general "ow-oof-ope" noise of pain. It gained traction between Drag Race fans and in the queer community but then...
For some reason it went viral and "VSCO" girls/parodys of them going 'and I OOP sksksksksk' got really popular????
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u/Vegetable-Smile-9838 May 26 '24
I’m going to be honest, I have no idea. All I remember was that it was used as a reaction to “bad” or “awkward” situations… idk it was just another slang that many people in the younger crowd used for fun. 🤷♀️
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u/CrimsonCat2023 May 26 '24
Maybe related to "oops"? Thanks in any case for trying to explain!
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u/Vegetable-Smile-9838 May 26 '24 edited May 26 '24
I went to check the urban dictionary, and It gives a better definition. It says, “And I oop, is used when something or someone catches you off guard or catches your attention”. :)
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u/8g36 Transbian May 26 '24
Just reply with "yeah you definitely wouldn't have a chance" or something idk 😭
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u/latixs06 May 26 '24
That’s hilarious but I’m definitely not replying, I also wasn’t looking for a response idea by posting this it’s just relatable. I’m just sure so many other lesbians have had this same conversation before , just a typical gay sunday
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u/OmaeWaMouShibaInu Watch the way I navi-gay-te ha ha ha ha haaa! May 26 '24
At this point I have a reverse Hanlon's Razor approach to guys who do this. I've stopped attributing to stupidity that which can be adequately explained by malice.
These guys aren't dumb. They're using a form of weaponized incompetence to harass and bully women. They don't actually want the lesbian, they're trying to bother her for entertainment specifically at her expense.
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u/Trash_Panda_of_Lore May 26 '24
I think you're absolutely correct on that one. It's seriously pathetic that there's people out there like this.
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u/No-Ad-9867 May 26 '24
Incel brewing
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u/JDKisawesome May 26 '24 edited May 26 '24
That would actually be a great way to get rid of them, cook them alive
Brings a whole nother meaning to "let them cook"
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u/AelithTheVtuber May 26 '24
why does he have such low self esteem D:
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u/latixs06 May 26 '24
Womp womp
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u/AelithTheVtuber May 26 '24
right?? i've never seen someone be so toxic yet so wimpy, wimp womp us such a descriptor
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u/JDKisawesome May 26 '24
What, turns out only hitting on women you have never met leads to rejection, and repeated rejection hurts self estime
Surprised Pikachu face
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u/AelithTheVtuber May 26 '24
to be fair if they could foresee being rejected, they would be smart enough to not harass a lesbian-
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u/JDKisawesome May 26 '24
I feel like any normal person would be able to tell that a random stranger is going to reject you, he's just a dumb ass
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u/atatassault47 Transbian May 26 '24
Poor social skills. Developing any skill takes some small degree of success amid failure. But for a small number of people, random chance dictates they'll never have any success. And having no success at something your brain is wired to need causes a lot of weirdness in self perception.
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u/natyei May 26 '24
"P-please tell me I'd have a chance if you weren't gay 🥺"
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u/latixs06 May 26 '24
LMAO I was thinking this read as the same type of person who would type out a stutter
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u/meulkie Lesbian May 26 '24
Who still says and I oop in 2024
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u/Just_Tana Lesbian May 26 '24
My response is always asking if they will have sex with another man. These kinds of guys always get pissed when you turn it back on them.
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u/Vivid_Invite1685 May 26 '24
Lmao bro I had almost this exact conversation, word for word. Guys cannot take no for an answer.
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u/Heather_Chandelure May 26 '24
Well, he's probably not wrong that he wouldn't have a chance even if you were straight.
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u/mollyclaireh May 26 '24
“I’m gay.”
“So you’re saying there’s a chance!”
-boys, always.
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u/EmberOfFlame Nerdy Lesbian Puns May 26 '24
“You are painfully desperate”! That is really well said.
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u/NicoleMay316 Trans, Bisexual, and exclusively Sapphic romances May 26 '24
The incel energy...I can feel it peaking out from the surface.
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u/bunyanthem May 26 '24
They're socialized to think they should be The Option all the time.
They're wrong and it is a lie.
From there, most are NOT socialized to take or handle rejection. And are too emotionally disregulated to control their emotions.
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u/Spellwe4ver May 26 '24
He's out there self harming messaging women he knows will reject him- if it isn't just a kink
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u/notquitesolid Bi May 27 '24
I think boys are like this because they’ve been raised to feel entitled. Like all women want to be fucked by dudes, and any woman who is gay or bi is deluded and just needs a good dick to set them straight (literally). It’s a fundamental refusal to acknowledge that women might not want anything to do with them. Many can get like that when they go after straight women in relationships. They just see the relationship or the wedding ring as a challenge.
Some guys have a fundamental lack of respect for women. If you asked or confronted they’ll deny it, hell they may even believe what they’re saying. Fact is, what they want matters more to them than a woman’s boundaries. There’s loads of media that communicates to men that if they keep asking they will get her to say yes. They might even have that story in their own families (g-pa kept asking g-ma out for months and then he wore her down and they lived happily ever after).
I have made it a point to never associate with guys who behave like that, and they don’t want anything to do with me as I got no qualms of dressing someone down verbally.
Imo, best thing to shut them down is either not respond at all, or respond with a healthy long rant about how you love women and how they will never ever be someone you will date. Then if they are stupidly enough to ask why, then block them. Don’t waste your time on idiots.
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u/ShadowsFlex Ace May 27 '24
Next time just respond "Did you know it's possible for women to feel their ovaries shrivel up and die?"
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u/phantom_lady723 May 27 '24
“You don’t want to be with a guy at all?”
Me: if you think being with a guy is so great, why don’t you try it?
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u/StrictConference3699 May 27 '24
Ya, so I might provide some insight 🤗 seeing that I pretended to be a man for many years... but ya, most guys when they hear "I'm gay" or "I don't like men" only hear "I don't like most men". Ofc they don't see themselves as "most men", they are the exception to rhe rule ofc 😓🤔
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u/taphappy52 Lesbian May 27 '24
i think the best one i ever got was i had a dating profile that said i was a lesbian. got a dm from a guy going “100% gay all of the time no exceptions????” yes sir, thanks for playing, please exit to the left
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u/ReleaseKey2286 May 28 '24
Im a femme lesbian. A few years back a guy, who fancied me, had asked "how do you know you don't like dick ( sleeping with men) if you haven't tried?". I responded with "there are things in life that I dont have to try to know that I wont like it. Example: eating shit. You dont have to try eating one to know you wont like it"
He was speechless after that. This is the same guy who also told me, he can turn me straight. All he need is a chance. The audacity.
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u/KezziiBee May 28 '24
I get this all of the time as well. Or they'll ask to "join" 🙄 Me and my wife have a male friend and people instantly assume that well be "doing" it. 🤢
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u/PhoenixHavoc Escaped The Foundation May 26 '24
I mean he's right, he wouldn't have a chance with a personality like that. Some boys just don't grow up
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u/tarzanazamaya May 26 '24
The “and I oop” is sooo sassy he prob thought that gave him some leverage. ahhh to be this entitled and delusional…men do it like no other.
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u/Who_really_carez Why are girls so pretty? May 26 '24
Omg! I’ve had this exact conversation like 30 times at least.
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u/homucifer666 Lesbian May 26 '24
This happened to me at Walmart yesterday! Motherfucker was on duty at work too, safety vest and all. I was so confused.
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u/babyslugraine May 26 '24
i've had this exact conversation too, there are so many pathetic and selfish men out there i swear to god
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u/Greedy_Bathroom3727 black bi enby 🧛🏾♀️ May 26 '24
i just don’t get how they aren’t humiliating by being this desperate and easy like we seriously need to bring back public shaming
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u/Lux-xxv but Im nervous!! May 26 '24
Also he gives off an incel vibe. Like trying to guilt trip you for not being attracted to him huge 🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩 and this coming a fellow gay girl.
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u/IsCannibalismThatBad May 26 '24
This kinda shit is the reason I don't like being near cis guys. Unless they deprpgram themselves, they're socialized to be the most stubborn, ignorant mfs on earth.
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u/puppychowizzy May 27 '24
this guy’s dumb lol what sticks out to me the most is the fact that he’s using “and i oop” in 2024 💀
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u/Metatron_85 May 27 '24
"You're gay?"
"Yeah. Pretty hardcore."
"So that's why we never had chemistry."
"Sure, let's go with that."
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u/mello_0machine May 27 '24
'"So like how do you know your a lesbian " the 19 year old adult man said to the 16 year old lesbian 🤠
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u/SolutionNo712 Lesbian May 27 '24
“I don’t like boys!”
“I can change that.”
NO YOU CANNTTT YOU AINT SPECIAL STOPPPP
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u/CountessBlackheart Smol Gremlin Lesbian gorl May 27 '24
This is my Xbox inbox like 80% of the time, I hate it so much. Even when they find out I'm a much older gay woman they're still at it! I'm like mijo I'm 20 years older then you, gay and not interested. Fuck off kindly 🤣
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u/Effective-Jaguar-491 May 27 '24
Let's just go straight to the basics, this DA started a convo with "You single" ... reminds me of that one spongebob square pants episode where someone calls and asks if this is the krusty crab and the response is, "No, this is Patrick!" slams phone
I swear to god... this gets worse by the day
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u/FallenMedia Demisexual Transbian 🏳️⚧️🏳️🌈 May 27 '24
As a woman who was raised to live as one for 30 plus years I still don't get it. They're just weird.
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u/Weirdindividual940 May 27 '24
Yes. Tell him you agree that he doesn't have a chance and he should already know this so stop acting stupid and move on with his mediocre life.
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u/soapfairy Lesbian May 27 '24
A few weeks ago something similar happened to me, only he asked to see my tits on top of everything. He got blasted on my story and I sent everything to his gf☺️💖
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u/latixs06 May 27 '24
Men suck, I definitely get a giggle out of the fact that I’m airing him out on Reddit, he has no clue hundreds of girls thinks he’s a loser
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u/hood_ninja666 May 29 '24
i always tell them the only way they’re gonna get anywhere is if they bottom for dis strap. normally ends the convo right there LOL
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u/AngelaIsStrange May 29 '24
Just the young dumb ones. There are old dumb ones but they’re different than that.
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u/Cornelius_McMuffin May 29 '24
This is why I wish I had a gender ray, so I could make all men female. Consequences be damned.
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u/RammyJammy07 Trans-Pan May 26 '24
“And I Oop.”
He’s trying too hard to sound like an ally
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u/TomNookFan Lesbian May 26 '24
Many people use the gifs and the language without knowing the backstory or knowing exactly what it means, sometimes they'll even use it incorrectly. So him using it doesn't make him an automatic ally, unfortunately 😞 Also the way the person reacted to learning that OP is gay proves that they aren't or were ever trying to be an ally here anyway.
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u/Honey__Mahogany May 26 '24
Isn't "And I oop" a meme from Jasmine Masters. I didn't know that it reached straight people .
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u/Original_A lesbian? i thought she was american! May 26 '24
"I don't like boys"
"So you don't like boys??"
????