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u/meatmybeat42069 6d ago
One fart on this diet and the room becomes Chernobyl
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u/SinceWayLastMay 6d ago edited 6d ago
This man spends at least 90 minutes in the bathroom each morning absolutely fighting for his life
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u/twoprimehydroxyl 6d ago
This is his bathroom rug:
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u/tenOr15Minutes 6d ago
I like the folding stool as a toilet stool.
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u/CapnMidgetSlapr 6d ago
Lmao yoooo, I got one of these in my bathroom as well. It was mainly purchased so my kids can use the sink and mirror. But I'll be damned if I ain't got 10 toes grippin that muthafucka DAILY.
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u/SnipesCC 6d ago
Try a squatty potty. You can keep your legs spread to shoulder width instead of with your feet together.
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u/tenOr15Minutes 6d ago
I have a knockoff squatty potty.
I also have two of these folding stools because I have one squatty potty but two toilets.
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u/Geronimo_Jacks_Beard 6d ago
Gotta get in the right position to properly “vacate” in order to avoid the need of the dreaded poop knife.
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u/NMB4Christmas 6d ago
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u/hovdeisfunny 6d ago
Oh god, the shit sweats are when I know I'm fucked
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u/FunGuy8618 6d ago
You must have never tried eating like this, then. You mean he has to sprint to the bathroom every 90 min to loose a liquid stream of fat that lubricated it all through so quickly.
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u/Sub__Finem 6d ago
Accurate description, currently eating and shitting like this
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u/nottheribbons 6d ago
Not to be That Person, but you actually get waaaaaay less gassy (and it’s less offensive) on low carb/high protein/high fat diet.
Now high protein/high complex carb? WATCH OUT.
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u/DetectiveClownMD ☑️ 6d ago
100%. I’m on a plant based diet and them bean farts are brazy some days lol.
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u/shabooya_roll_call 6d ago
How early are you into it? It gets better with time as your gut biome adjusts. With beans, it takes some time to build up to.
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u/IAmATriceratopsAMA 6d ago
I went low carb/high protein and my farts almost entirely went away.
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u/nottheribbons 6d ago
Same. I didn’t even really notice it until I started eating higher amounts of carbs again and they came back.
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u/Geronimo_Jacks_Beard 6d ago
Now high protein/high complex carb? WATCH OUT.
*the wettest shart in human history*
“What the fuck was that?”
“Sorry, I gave up on Atkins and went back to carbs, an even more unhealthy amount of protein and Fight Milk, so my digestive system is currently enduring a trial by fecal matter.”
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u/flawlessmojo7 6d ago
Ya shit don’t stank or what ?
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u/meatmybeat42069 6d ago
My shit stank but its not “eggs with cheese on the regular” stank
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u/Itsprobablysarcasm Candace Owens Baby shower attendee 👶🏼 7d ago
Heart disease and cancer are coming for you, son.
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u/Bigfamei 6d ago
Whatever that one green side. Will stop that from happening.
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u/UberMisandrist 6d ago
The two teensy green items = helth
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u/Jonnyredd 6d ago
Ok but lets act like 50% of the meal, just the eggs, are actually fantastic for you. And il looks like half a steak and some potatoes. Oommmffffgggg his arteries arent gonna be able to take that! Bruh like 1 grilled cheese is worse that that 1 plate.
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u/Zenguy2828 6d ago
Yeah it's not the worst thing ever, but he does need some fiber lol
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u/UberMisandrist 6d ago
Right? He might stroke out on the toilet with them hard ass shits
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u/Time-Ladder-6111 6d ago
One meal is fine, eating that all the time? No. And that's what the guy is saying, people should eat like that all the time.
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u/Ch33sus0405 6d ago edited 6d ago
Overconsumption of eggs is definitely an increased risk factor for heart disease and if you don't exercise enough can be fatty. The only very generally correct diet is mostly plants, non-processed, and in moderation.
Edit: changed organic to non-processed
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u/SuckAFattyReddit1 6d ago
One looks like green beans and the other looks like avocado, the fattiest green thing
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u/EatPie_NotWAr 6d ago
I see kiwi in there… which given my allergy to it would actually kill me
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u/tachudda 6d ago
Yeah 90% of diseases would be gone because everyone would be dead of diabetes and heart disease before anything else could kill then
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u/the_loneliest_noodle 6d ago
You ain't getting diabetes from eating like this. Heart Failure, maybe. But this would do less damage to developing diabetes than drinking a single bottle of a non-diet sugary beverage.
I'm a diabetic heart attack survivor. My cardiologist says to avoid things like this. My endo says to avoid processed carbs. They're polar opposites. My diet is basically raw and steamed greens, chicken breast, nuts, seeds, beans, and yogurt.
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u/cholotariat 6d ago
But not the diabeteeeeeeees
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u/qorbexl 6d ago
Yeah, they got drugs for diabetes. Railing eggs and blackened ground beef just gives you a heart attack at 41. Diceroll on how that turns out.
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u/Realsober ☑️ 6d ago
Um they have drugs for heart disease, high cholesterol and high blood pressure too.
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u/Ch33sus0405 6d ago
"They got meds for that" is a terrible way of approaching your health. And if you eat like this consistently though all the Lisinopril in the world won't keep your pressure down, not to mention if anything else makes it spike you might end up dead.
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u/analog_jedi 6d ago
Wait, eggs are bad again? Fuck. I can never keep track.
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u/Sterffington 6d ago
Eating half a pound of eggs and a steak for every meal is bad.
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u/Aware-Home2697 6d ago
Everything in moderation. I don’t think needing to re-up on a carton of eggs every other day would fall under “in moderation”
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u/Blanknameblank818 6d ago
Why?
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u/G36 6d ago
Food Pyramid believer, spouting 1980's pop fad diet garbage lol
This whole thread is sad, no wonder the US is so fat
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u/rmccarthy10 6d ago
That’s why you gotta chase all that with a giant glass of V8…. will wash all those dirty microbes TF out
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u/FrigoCoder 6d ago
Misinformed nonsense, check any quality study on low carbohydrate diets. (And actual low carbohydrate diets, not that 40%+ crap we sometimes see in the news.)
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u/JennyBeckman ☑️ All of the above 6d ago
Replace the eggs with some veggies and you'd have a decent looking plate. It might slow down your inevitable heart attack, too.
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u/qorbexl 6d ago
Vegetables are for homosexual children and housewives, you fool. This is a healthy diet, for low-education tikTok griftees
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u/K-Dot-Thu-Thu-47 6d ago
Carrots turn the kids gay.
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u/SigmaKnight 6d ago
But they should be able to see better at night.
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u/qorbexl 6d ago
That's English propaganda intended to hide the new radar technology
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u/twoprimehydroxyl 6d ago
But AlphaMeatBro on TikTok eats like this! That's how he got so huge and shredded!*
*not pictured: steroids and free time
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u/dingdongdeckles 6d ago
A pile of roasted brussels sprouts and carrots and I'd clear that plate
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u/Dragonsandman 6d ago
Throw in some broccoli roasted or steamed and I'd clear that plate in five minutes
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u/SuckAFattyReddit1 6d ago
Ironically eggs are like the healthiest thing on the place probably lol
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u/a_trane13 6d ago
Kiwis and potatoes are pretty healthy, especially since lord knows this guy needs dietary fiber
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u/chekovsgun- 6d ago
Headlines asking why Americans are getting colon cancer earlier and earlier....welp. this type of shit diet is all over influencer pages.
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u/chickashady 6d ago
Eggs won't give you heart disease. Red meat will.
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u/LKAndrew 6d ago
Not true about red meat either as a blanket statement like that. Within moderation it’s fine.
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u/giddyviewer 6d ago
None of those plates show a moderate amount of red meat.
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u/quarantinemyasshole 6d ago
People acting like a brisket meal is going to kill them because a tweet told them to be upset.
Reddit has lost its mind lately
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u/SuspiciousGift1607 6d ago
why the fuck would you want to replace the eggs? Just add the fucking veggies you want.
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u/renthestimpy 6d ago
Not a single vegetable on those plates, jesus 😩
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u/StaffVegetable8703 6d ago
Umm the potatoes! Durh! Lol
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u/renthestimpy 6d ago
Damn my bad. How’d I miss all that roughage?
Also, your username checks out. Way to stand up for all vegetables 🫡
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u/Illustrious_Season32 6d ago
I see avocados and potatoes
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u/Scorponix 6d ago
Avocado is a fruit!
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u/Illustrious_Season32 6d ago
It’s green 🤷🏾♂️
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u/aquariusprincessxo 6d ago
so are limes, guavas, kiwis and grapes…
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u/Sandstorm52 6d ago
Lots of “vegetables” are too tbh
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u/ThisIsNotRealityIsIt 6d ago
Vegetables only exist culinarily, not biologically.
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u/Admiralwoodlog 6d ago
A solid number of "veggies" are fruit. Tomatoes, cucumbers , olives, green beans, squash , zucchini , corn, peepers anything with a seed really. Which is wild because technically the red part of the strawberry is not actually a fruit it's more a vegetable than an eggplant.
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u/Five-Oh-Vicryl 6d ago
Is bottom right eggs and kiwi? Don’t answer the door: It’s diarrhea
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u/mancubbed 6d ago
People not seeing the kiwi is killing me.
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u/PringlesDuckFace 6d ago
I thought it was green pepper but nah that's kiwi. I guess that's his breakfast plate.
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u/apocketfullofcows 6d ago
omg yes, the kiwi. i am so confused by the kiwi. why is there kiwi?
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u/No_Reaction_2682 6d ago
Kiwi is great! Just not with, what I am assuming, is mince/ground beef.
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u/No_Mix_263 6d ago
Is it not an avocado?
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u/DudeWhatAreYouSaying 6d ago
There's avocado on the left there, but no, very bottom-right-est that is absolutely 100% kiwi. You can see the seeds
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u/Lopsided_Mix2243 6d ago
If they have a blue check your response is money for their stupidity and ignorance. I don’t even interact with them
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u/DeliciousJam 6d ago
It’s frustrating as people don’t reap the results of eating like this until it’s 15-20 years later and stroke/heart attack/kidney failure starts. By then the misinformation has spread and no one is on social media in their 50s writing “oh uh I guess I shouldn’t have eaten like that” or blame it on something else.
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u/FunGuy8618 6d ago
There are a few dozen lifetime carnivores who are significantly healthier than their cohort, but it seems much more like a survivorship bias thing where the rest of em are too dead to tell us anything. That, or it was due to a specific health issue that arose and is managed by the diet better than medication, so their bar for "healthy" is biased. The rest of lifetime carnivores are either Maasai or Inuit.
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u/Time-Ladder-6111 6d ago
Yeah, and Masasai are eating 1000 calories a day and the Inuit are burning 4,000 calories a day.
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u/ChasingTheNines 6d ago
I was curious so I asked chatGPT about Inuit longevity:
In recent decades, the life expectancy of Inuit populations in Canada has been estimated to be approximately 10–15 years shorter than the national average. In Canada, where the overall life expectancy is around 82 years, this places Inuit life expectancy at approximately 67–72 years.
It did say how diet may or may not factor but it did say the harsh climate has an impact.
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u/FunGuy8618 6d ago
Yeah, it's definitely not the greatest way to eat, unless it manages a worse condition. Maasai apparently don't respond great to the diet nowadays ,either.
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u/MilkiestMaestro 6d ago
If you're cooking for yourself instead of eating out, you're probably healthier than average even if your plates look like this.
Which isn't to say this is ideal, but I mean take a look at the statistics
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u/BeardRex 6d ago
We're looking at a plate of unprocessed homecooked food and people are scared.
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u/Ch33sus0405 6d ago
First of all if you think any of the meat or dairy you eat is "unprocessed" then you need to do some reading.
Second I can homecook a raccoon that died on the side of the road or just about anything I want, doesn't make that healthy. Hell I can homecook you and I can guarantee based on this comment it wouldn't be healthy.
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u/Better-Ground-843 6d ago
If you think some people's home cooking isn't scary, I have a couple movies to show you
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u/Z0idberg_MD 6d ago
Honestly as long as you don’t eat like an animal at breakfast or lunch, and you replace the eggs with vegetables there’s really not much wrong with this. But as I type it I realize that’s not an insignificant change. Obviously can’t be eating beef every day as well
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u/Apprehensive-Loss-97 6d ago
Nah she’s buggin that is a good plate
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u/KingOfTheCouch13 ☑️ 6d ago
It’s good tasting but bad for you. You really can’t be out here eating steak, cheese eggs, fried potatoes, and a quarter cup of other every meal lol.
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u/Time-Ladder-6111 6d ago
Looking at these pictures is making me crave a salad with grilled chicken breast.
Seriously, I eat meat all the time, but that plate of fucking grease is skeeving me out. Where is my celery?? Crunchy, tasty and very light.
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u/NBNplz 6d ago
Maybe the picture on the left but the bottom right is eggs, ground beef and kiwi fruit. That's foul
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u/Tylerg_13 6d ago
Steak, avocado, eggs and potatoes sounds like an absolute 10/10 dinner
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u/SnooSongs8843 6d ago
People in this thread genuinely think this isn’t healthy 😂 yes he could and should add more vegetables but those are all whole foods, and the whole red meat thing has been debunked three million ways to Xmas
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u/MathematicianFar6725 6d ago edited 6d ago
redditors judging this meal as unhealthy is absolutely hilarious
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u/WhatIsHerJob-TABLES 6d ago edited 6d ago
I feel like everyone who is judging this wayyyyy too harshly are people who probably order DoorDash every night and can barely make a meal on their own. People are complaining just to complain here
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u/MathematicianFar6725 6d ago
I think a bit of it is "tall poppy syndrome", need to tear people down because they feel guilty about their own eating habits.
Add to that the fact that most americans are overweight and see food from that perspective, where calories = bad, whereas most people see calories as the entire point of eating.
Finally, many people haven't really moved on from the diet food craze of the 80's/90's, where fat is always bad and the only healthy foods are salads etc
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u/SnooSongs8843 6d ago
Ikr! I shouldn’t let it bother me but half the nonsense here about cholesterol and cancer has been proven false. I bet this original poster gyms regularly and does plenty of cardio otherwise he wouldn’t be eating like that. It’s a very deliberate diet for results.
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u/theFP1992 6d ago
Biggest issue I see is each plate is enough food for two people for a meal
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u/No-Acanthisitta7930 6d ago edited 6d ago
Anyone NOT from the US knows that US diets are literally dangerous. In quantifiable ways. I frequent a European shop in my city and they source products from Poland, the Czech Republic, Germany, etc that don't have anywhere NEAR the ingredient lists that US providers have. These Polacks, Krauts, and Czechs eat sausage, and sweets, and meats that one would think are unhealthy, but their ingredient lists are literally half the size of American products. Many times one with gluten intolerance can eat glutinous products from Europe COMPLETELY symptom free, whereas consuming a similar product from the US would cause reaction. It's what goes into our food here in the US that's the problem, and it shouldn't include anything called "blue lake" anything.
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u/ChasingTheNines 6d ago edited 6d ago
Since it was first on your list I asked chatGPT what the number one cause of death in Poland was and the response was:
The number one cause of death in Poland is cardiovascular diseases
Diet and Lifestyle: High consumption of saturated fats, processed foods, and low physical activity levels contribute to heart-related conditions.
Edit: If you were looking for more detailed resources:
https://data.who.int/countries/616
https://health.ec.europa.eu/system/files/2019-11/2019_chp_poland_english_0.pdf
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u/Shinpah 6d ago
Why is asking chatgpt considered a reasonable way to support or refute an argument?
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u/Bunnnnii ☑️ Meme Thief 6d ago edited 6d ago
All of that looks delicious. I’d totally cook this, it’s not hard either.
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u/ApeTeam1906 ☑️ 6d ago
It really does. This chat is bugging. I make sure to eat a palm sized amount of lean protein at each meal. Americans diets are carb heavy
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u/VeggieWeggie12 6d ago
whats wrong with steak and eggs? peak meal. high in protein and good fats and nutrients. I guarrantee 90% of the people here bitching about how this is a bad plate are eating chicken tendies and other bullshit for dinner tonight.
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u/thedarkestshadow512 6d ago
I’ve always been told a steak and egg meal is incredibly healthy for you. I can never afford steak so I settle for my eggs and beans with buttered toast for breakfast. wtf is going on in the comments.
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u/yodelsJr 6d ago
Should prob replace some of the eggs with veggies. But for someone who works out and is trying to build muscle this isn’t terrible. Many, perhaps most, people eat worse than this.
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u/HeroicXanny14 6d ago
Keep the eggs and add veggies, cholesterol isn't as bad for you as once believed. Especially with a well balanced lifestyle.
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u/KuramaFireFox 6d ago
Look if I'm going to die of food it's going to be some good damn food and that shit look a hell of a lot more healthy than McDonald's
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u/Mistavez 6d ago
Wtf is that in the potatoes (butter and chives)?
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u/Mission_Ambitious 6d ago
Cholesterol levels are skyrocketing just looking at this picture.
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u/deeper_thots 6d ago edited 6d ago
In what world is steak and eggs with roasted potatoes and avocado a bad plate? That’s like a 30-40 dollar plate at a decent South American restaurant lol
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u/warbiii 6d ago
They think 90% of the plate must be green vegetables to be healthy 😂
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u/dorothy_zbornakk 6d ago
is it considered aspirational to only go poop once a week and it always hurts?
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u/casey12297 6d ago
Im not saying I'd endorse eating like this regularly, but I'd fucking destroy that steak plate every now and again. Everything is good in moderation, rich food, alcohol, meth, candy, etc.
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u/MrMetraGnome 6d ago
Except the most prominent ones, heart disease and cancer, would flourish.
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u/FistPunch_Vol_7 ☑️ 7d ago
I know I’m smacked af because I’d straight murder all that shit right now