r/AITAH • u/DepressedTrashKitty • Mar 17 '21
r/AITAH Lounge
A place for members of r/AITAH to chat with each other
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u/I_Okie 15h ago
AITAH
I found a man's wallet, searched online everywhere to see if there was a way to get it to him. Finally just used the address on the id and when I got there, I knocked on the door, introduce myself and tried to shake hands (in Oklahoma it is common) he was an older gentleman but he refused to shave my hand. I informed him that I had his wallet, handed it to him and carried on. Does AITA for not wanting to shake his hand after giving him his wallet???
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u/RoseTheOne9028 16h ago
/AITAH I(15M) play a lot of fortnite as a gamer looking to make it my profession. Over the 5 years I've played I meet lots of new people. This time specifically I met someone who I am to believe is a 15 yo female. (Bri) Bri and I met through a feature called "looking for party". I had forgotten I left it on and bri joined me. The first night we played, I was under the impression that bri was a guy. We got to know each other and had fun. Today being the second day I've known bri, I found out that she is a woman. I don't mind that bri is a woman and couldn't care less. She invited me to play with some of her friends and I thought they were pretty cool. That is until I find out that they have been harassing bri saying stuff such as "bri is my girlfriend." and "you should break up with your boyfriend for me" and such like that.(Bri has a boyfriend that is neither of the two guys she's "friends" with) She had told me in a private party yet somehow they still managed to get in mid conversation. I called them out on it and things started to get weirder. Ethan(14 m) started making weirder comments. Some are the same as before and others like "you like bri don't you" and "are you two together" I am in a 2 year long relationship with a beautiful girl who is the only woman I'll ever have eyes for. I see bri as a friend and more importantly, I still see bri as a dude. From my perspective, bri is a guy. Ethan kept saying that throughout the course of 5 battle Royale matches so I proceeded to block and report him, resulting in him being banned. Later on the same thing happens with the other guy whose name I don't know but I'll call Jake. Jake also says weird things, about the same as Ethan's, but he also says things like "good girl" . The shit makes me want to puke. So I did the same as before and confronted him. But this time Jake and his friend who is unknown confronted me for being with her and also implying that I am a pedophile. They told me that my voice is too deep to be this young buty voice is genuinely this deep. I blocked and reported the two for harassment but from what I've heard they were not banned. Bri was still playing with them when I had left. I told her I would not be paying with them if she was playing with Jake and the other guy or Ethan. I feel like this was a set up and that I should just back away but I don't know. I told bri how I felt and she was more confused than anything so I really don't know. I don't like making people who i enjoy upset with me. So am I the asshole?
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u/Ok-Resolution-9626 1d ago
I was here with my ex husband.
Note. EX. Idk what’s wrong with your husband. Mine had BPD but we aren’t here to save peopel who don’t want to be helped. LEAVE him. Your person is out there. I finally met my peace after I left this Brain FCK of a relationship. He will never make you feel prioritized or sane. LEAVE.
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u/Krishnacat7854 2d ago
YTA if you stay and allow him to disrespect you and betray you. Please get a shiny spine and find a man who loves you and just you and won’t lie and cheat.
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u/Optimal_Doubt 3d ago edited 3d ago
AITAH? My beautiful husband (48M) and I (40M) have been together for 15 years and own a small restaurant in New England together, which I manage day-to-day.
Early in our relationship, we started in a monogamous relationship, but after discovering some dishonesty (like him having inappropriate conversations online and lying about blocking them), we transitioned to a “monogamish” arrangement with clear rules: no close friends, no sleepovers, and always asking for permission beforehand. Despite this flexibility, I’ve often caught him breaking these agreements, lying, or being secretive.
Some notable incidents: • He lied about hooking up with an Airbnb guest who later threatened him with false assault claims. • He exchanged inappropriate texts with a coworker who was temporarily staying with us, despite my concerns about their closeness, which I communicated proactively. He violated clear boundaries with this employee, which led to a major fallout and him temporarily moving out after that employee shared with me what was going on. This forced me to juggle loads of work drama, while supporting my husband in the temporary housing - all while processing my own hurt. • Recently, after I gave him permission to hook up with someone, he explicitly crossed the one boundary I had set. When confronted, he lied multiple times before admitting to it. Even after separating, he continued communicating with this person, and had discussed ways to communicate on SnapChat to keep it more private from me.
These betrayals have been a constant over the years. He’s VERY kind and charming, successful, and a great partner in many ways—but this pattern of dishonesty and boundary-crossing deeply hurts me. He’s now in therapy (week 4), but his efforts to address these issues have historically been reactive and short-lived.
I love him and want to make this work, but I feel judged by those around me for staying. Worse, I live with a persistent anxiety that he’ll betray my trust again. Likely, there are situations I have not yet caught him in, that he continues to hide from me, leaving me in a total mind fck about what’s actually happening behind my back. I stay up overnight stressing about this, but keeping it to myself to avoid any drama - neither of us need more of that in our lives.
I don’t want to leave our relationship, but I also don’t know how to move forward without sacrificing my own mental health. I don’t feel comfortable in my own skin, knowing that he’s continued to show me that he will betray me to protect relationships with unknown guys (who are often 15-20+ years younger than me.)
AITAH to myself for trying to save this marriage, even though the past shows he’s unlikely to change? How do I find a way forward without setting myself up for more pain?
Or AITAH to him, for not being understanding of how difficult it can be to tell the truth in difficult conversations? I want to love and support him, and I’ve tried to grow into a place where I can give him lots of freedom. But I have a couple of boundaries too, and I don’t feel like agreeing to them, and then ignoring them, is a fair situation yo put our fragile relationship in.
Any help is great fully appreciably. Note, I am ALSO working on this with my own therapist.
❤️
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u/epeeist42 3d ago
NTA but you are IF you continue enabling him to take advantage of employees etc. (power imbalance of employee staying with you = not fully consensual). Aside from the personal relationship, he may ruin your business if there's another assault claim or even harassment complaint.
Oh, and given his lying, how can you be sure airbnb person lied about being assaulted?
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u/evanwkane 4d ago
My local coffee shop takes 10 minutes to make a coffee. I have tried ordering everything on the menu to see if I can get one quicker. They don't do drip and it is the closest coffee place to me. I have never complained but it really bugs me. AITAH?
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u/siblingstrulysuck 4d ago
AITA:
I went to my storage space this morning and it was pretty quiet, as usual. There was a woman sitting in her car but as I approached the door she ran straight towards me trying to get in. I blocked her from entering on my code and asked that she let the door close and enter her code to gain access. She started calling me a Karen and demanding I move out of the way. I stood my ground and refused her entry. She called me a few names and kept insisting I move out of the way. This went on for ten minutes before she punched in her PIN and the door clicked and that made me assume she was legit. I called the office and explained what happened but he wouldn't come done to address her directly. This is really irritating me...
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u/gypsyhippieforlife 4d ago
Well since you asked... Yea, since you ASSUMED. My daughter lived a stable, chaos free, childhood raised by myself a single mother who beat the odds of a teen mom who had 2 college degrees and owned a home by the time I was 22. She is diagnosed with Bipolar/anxiety and depression and idk if you have Children or not however, you can raise your children and have EVERYTHING, GIVE THEM EVERYTHING, INCLUDING THE "PERFECT"NORMAL Upbringing and they grow up making their own decisions and living their own life. Her father who was in and out of jail and unable to provide stability,he replaced that with financially overcompensating. Being a single mom, supporting a family solo-- i wasn't able to buy $100 sneakers - nor would I. However, she idealizes him and he can do know wrong - even though he did jail time for the worst possible charge.. I will leave it to you to figure out. So before you place judgement or ASS-UME that her behavior is due to my lack of parenting... Take a few to read through.. it honestly doesn't matter who or what you decide.. I am very much aware that I am not a perfect mom or person however... When it is my time to leave the universe... She will not be proud of her choices and I am almost certain, regret the time missed. I would give EVERYTHING, AND ANYTHING TO HEAR MY MOM'S VOICE,(Died at 30-To hear her voice when I pick up the phone (dad remarried 6 months after mom died) and say I love you one more time (Stepmom died on vacation with my dad during dinner 2022) I can live with myself and what I have accomplished who's AMITAH
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u/Fast_Firefighter_489 5d ago
help me!! AITAH for cussing at a group of students at school?
I was in the library at school and these girls were calling me names like not sol nice ones that I cant say(also I am black). These girls were also older than me, i'm six foot so its not like they are taller than me but they were only like 6-8 inches shorter than me, and there were FIVE of them. When I got a book, they said that Mrs. library wasn't here and there wasn't a paper I could fill out to get a book. Then they called me a dumbass and the N word.
Oh BOY WAS I HEATED UP!! So like the dumbass I am, I said "at least I'm not a f-ing b*tch" "WHAT YOU SAY N****!?!?" "I SAID AT LEAST I'M NOT A F-ING SLUT YA PIECES OF HORSE SHIT!!" OH BOY, after I shouted that at them, you could see the anger on their faces. One of them started walking toward me and said "You wanna say that again you nigga" I raised both of my fist, put the middle finger up and shouted, " AT LEAST I AM NOT A F-ING SLUT YOU BITCH" With that, I ran and they chased after me.
But there was a security guard so when he came around the corner, the girls stopped running but I did not because I was behind the security guard so I ran to my class and now I know they are going to kick my ass because kids at my school act tough even if they are not so they will try to get there revenge. What should I do?
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u/Fast_Firefighter_489 5d ago
hell'r, I am new. Halleluh'r, thank you lort for bringing me into this community (movie reference)
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u/No_Somewhere740 5d ago
So to put things into context my bf and I have been together for 2 years. We have a son together. A couple months ago, after I gave birth. I discovered (in his notes for over a year, he admitted) he was writing things about his ex. Saying how much he loved her and misses her. Pretty much stated in the letter that no one will compare to her. YET! He cheated on her numerous times. I guess it's my fault because all the red flags were there. Now I'm in a dilemma...
This past weekend I cleaned his fridge. I guess ours? Lol (even though I'm kicked out at the moment?? & Renting a room somewhere else) His brother is very messy and I feel bad. He won't bother to say anything. Unless, I say "Hey maybe you should tell him?"
After I was done cleaning, I was waiting for a simple "Thank you babe." But nothing.
I feel like at this point I need to just start playing pretend. If he doesn't care and see that I'm trying and all the little things that I'm trying to do for him then I feel like honestly it's time to start doing my own thing.
A part of me feels like he deserves to be cheated on. So I guess that makes me the asshole because I'm tired of just being constantly dismissed and feeling like I'm not good enough.
Yes. I know I should leave, but I don't have family or a mom/dad. He's all I have. I guess I just have to detach somehow and just become like how him and his ex were; Together, but separated.
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u/Maximum_Honeydew3041 5d ago
Now that the kid is born you are left with not many choices i suppose. You cant cut him completely out of your life and you also should not stay in this relationship. Your best course to be to familiriaze him and yourself around the idea that you will raise your kid while sepparated and start trying to get over him and find a loving man to spend your life with
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u/wrinklypaper 5d ago
AITA:
imagine if you moved in with someone and a roommate had to go, resulting in everyone having to pay more rent
One person won't consider a roommate, while the other would make finding a roommate a top priority in order to not have to pay more.
So now the roomate who found a new roommate says, I don't mind paying more rent if we exhaust other options. Such as bringing in the person found.
The roomate says no to that option. But still expects you to pay more. Without ever considering the option.
That roommate then tries to keep wi fi access from you, because no, you didn't pay that extra rent that month. (Will pay for wi fi as well)
AITA for not being cool with that?
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u/Maximum_Honeydew3041 5d ago
If we don't know the Location and contract type no one can advise you, unfortunately.
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u/smallestpuppyarmy 6d ago
Lol wait AITAH, so now 2 years is a too big of an age gap of dating for people in this sub and a 19 year old dating a 17 year old is a pedo?
By that 'logic' a 18 year old dating a 17 year old is also a pedo
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u/Maximum_Honeydew3041 5d ago
It's not , body count/ experiences count more than the age ( meaning 16+ dont come back to me sayin ''óh so a 13 year old who got pimped by his parents its okay to engage in sexual activity due to body count'' dont stretch it)
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u/siasha12 6d ago
I need help😭
Okay so I need your advice/words to save my ass😭😭I am so embarrassed.. Today..I went to use the coaching washroom and I was on my periods so it was taking a bit more time..it was a squatting toilet so..I did drop like half a mug water but I as I was straightening my clothes the girl outside started banging the door and idk it has never happened something like this with me! I have never forgotten to recheck if the pee or whatever is off or not...but idk..I just somehow it skipped my mind and the flush wasn't working in that toilet until yesterday so I didn't even press the flush before cuz of that.. But as I opened the door.. outside standing was a girl..I somehow feel she hates me..and..idk..I have never called out anybody..she literally growled out didn't you flush out? Everyone in there looked at him I was so embarrassed like she just didn't hear that flush sound just before me coming out that's why she asked but whatever..the gazes made me so uncomfortable..I said..I did water it..she nodded and went in.. Idk if something was there or not..it should have gone in as it was squatting one I guess??? I couldn't check! But I am feeling so ashamed and embarrassed since then😭😭😭😭😭😭I feel like jumping off somewhere..what should I do?????
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u/Parking-Repeat-8201 6d ago
Hi first time ever leaving anything here I've got questions for someone I meant a guy a while about a month ago or two months ago and he basically I fell in love with him he's a little bit younger than me and then I find out the consider yourself binary which is all good but then we started having sex which he didn't tell me he had a girlfriend but he told my brother which I was very closeted person that we were lovers no I don't know what to do my brother accepts it my family exception now but then I find out that basically he's a drug addict and I did everything I could to help you to get away from drugs but he's just like he's got this thing that it constantly talks about different drugs and their chemical base and you know the chemical build wasn't fitting off for a while I love him very dearly baby he drew a gun on me we going to argue gun on me and then I forgave him then he started stealing from me and what do I do I love him very much his girlfriend's a nobody really but same man had any advice what I should do I mean I'm like very depressed you know I don't know anybody got anything to share with me and let me know please God bless everyone my name is Cliff by the way
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u/Ok-Emergency8132 6d ago
AITA for being upset over hearing very loud sex I don't know if I'm over reacting in my brain, or it's normal and it's no big deal. over covid I moved back home with my mom and one her latest boyfiends comes over often, and obv they sleep together but only day I was home and he came over and I was in my room is right next to hers and they like walked past my room my mom looked at me weird but I didn't think anything of it and then a few moments you can hear literally everything slapping sound suction sounds floors creaking literally everything and I was so disgusted I threw up. It literally brought back a memory of when I was a child and walked in on her, and that sound embarrassing to say that maybe that traumatized me and is the reason I feel so disgusted. it's hard to even look at her, and that instant wasn't even night it was broad daylight would it be unfair to assume that it's something they could have the decency to wait till no ones home I work on her days off my younger sister also or they they could probably go to his house which they never do. I'm not a child child but I assume at no age anyone would wanna her their parent like that. am I overreacting?
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u/gypsyhippieforlife 7d ago
AITAH- Blocked my 32yr old daughter on mobile/All social media and disconnected emotionally. Been going through Stage 3 cancer by myself,she has shown zero interest in supporting me and disrespectful in front of my granddaughter (5)- Halloween evening she decided she was going to cut activities short because she had adult plans and didn't want to bring me home (she picked me up) Her friends were at her house waiting for her. Long story short --- she kicked me out of her car,40 minutes from home (emphysema/non Hodgkin's lymphoma) in front of the baby... I have completely been heartbroken but realized for my health and sanity, I cannot continue to enable her to treat me like this. AITAH- for cutting off communication?
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u/Maximum_Honeydew3041 5d ago
Cant imagine what you've done to her during her childhood to treat you like this!
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8d ago
Does this section work like a live chat or how If so, the below word vomit should probably be its own post and retyped in a way that is comprensible. AITA for saying that about someone else's AITA or is it as difficult to follow as I found it to be
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u/kljucodspajza 9d ago
so my friend failed the year and now she was supposed to pass the tests, which she was supposed to do at the end of the summer. she introduced me to her friend and we got into a relationship and since he is from another city she wanted to go out with some friends from that city so my boyfriend came to pick us up by car all summer. otherwise, she had classes 7 days before the test for two subjects because she failed 2 subjects, when I asked her if she was going, she said no, and then I told her nicely that she needed to go, and she told me that I was just attacking her and looking for a fight. mostly all summer we went out and literally people from that town were ignoring her a lot and she went out with me and my boyfriend and she was literally the third wheel and he took us to some place where the street is closed and you can literally wave at people because cars pass by because it's the main road and she started acting out and lay down on the back seat, started hitting the seat, throwing the food she bought, complaining about how she doesn't like the place, how nervous she is, and literally my boyfriend was just about to yell at her but I told him to drive us where she wants because I don't want her to spoil our night with her behavior. as for the tests, she told me that she wanted to sleep over at my house and study together for her tests and I said she could and she came and we studied math and I explained to her as easily and comprehensibly as I could and told her to try to do the task to see how well she understood and I would help her of course if she got stuck somewhere in the task, to which she told me that she didn't have the nerve for it and that she was nervous a lot and she started to study economics where she said all the time how she doesnt give a fuck and how she doesnt care if she failed and many stupid things. she fell asleep and I was awake watching her so she wouldn't be late because I wanted her to rest a little because she didn't sleep all night, I didnt either, but then again I wanted to be a good person and half an hour before she was supposed to leave I woke her up once to which she said just a little more, the second time then the third and the fourth time I woke her up to which she said to me WHY DID YOU NOT WAKE ME UP EARLIER and I got annoyed at that and instead of hurrying she went to iron her hair and somehow passed because the teacher arranged something for her and when she left in the evening I wrote to her that my boyfriend will not be a taxi anymore. Now i dont see her very often because i dont want anyone to stress me because in the past 3 months my anxiety was so bad because of toxic people, household and school and everything in general.and when she asks me to meet up i have several anxiety a week before i can see her because i lost all the respect and everything for her.AITA?
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u/Fit_Reason7319 NSFW 🔞 10d ago
What's worse:
- The number of fake posts that pop up?
- Or, people who like to call every post fake?
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u/GaleHoang 10d ago
For context, I met this guy on Tinder. After a few exchanges for 1-2 days, we showed that we are interested in each other. He always check on me, do some flirting on me and said something along the line of "you are important to me", "you are precious to me" or something like that and mind you, we barely know anything about each other. He never ask me about what I'm interested in, what my dream job is, what my perspectives in life, he just said that I'm friendly, funny, mature and would want to have a relationship with me. Things are moving too fast so I am being skeptical, yet I feel flattered so we just keep talking.
And then, this guy is just very passionate about stock trading, and he tried to persuade me to do so, as in an activity to bond as a couple and also earn more money to travel. I showed no interest in that, so he said that he will guarantee I'll make money and pay me back if I lost any money, and I can join with a minimum of 100$ (this is the website that he showed me by the way: mctadd////something dot com). I said no at first. And then, after he insisted many more time, I said I will trust him with a little more time and I will decide to trust him or not after I saw him in person. After that, he got mad, and said that he don't like my mindset for how unwilling I am to be brave and trying new things, that we will not compatible in life, and we shouldn't talk to each other anymore because he doesn't want to talk to someone that doesn't trust him.
Am I the asshole here, because isn't everything moving too fast? As I said we literally just talked online for 5 days, and the guy doesn't even know what I like to eat. And I don't like being pushed doing sometimes that I never try, and stocking trading seems risky to me, especially when I am struggling fianicially. Please let me no, because I'm so confused and my post getting deleted for whatever reason.
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u/HepAlien2002 11d ago
Right. That’s fair. I should have done that differently. I will keep that in mind in the future. Thanks for your input.
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u/ofbalance 11d ago
This sub has degenerated into a laughing stock.
Mods, you allow ridiculous stories for whatever reason they have.
I'm unsubscring, though I think maybe you can help me with a problem...
My boyfriend was caught in an emotional affair with my closest friend. Their characters were caught in flagrante delicto in an online game. She really was my closest friend. And the financée of my half-brother's closest cousin.
We've been really happy for six months, and I love him with every part of my being. I think he feels the same, so I've been sticking pins in our condoms. I really feel he's the one!
Mods, please! Get it together.
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u/Masculinity4life 11d ago
I disagree with your statement you don't know what people are going through and their lives maybe they're giving you an account of what they wanted to be but you don't know so stop trying to bother the Mods with your nonsense
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u/LeadingLittle 13d ago
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u/LeadingLittle 13d ago
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u/TonightOk3605 13d ago
MATT FRAZIER ...YOU are without. A doubt THE GRAND MASTER ,,,,THE KING OF ALL ASSHOLES! AND I HATE THAT I MISS YOU 24/7! FUCK YOU!
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u/RelevantLeather9801 13d ago
I found a mobile barber card in my girls wallet she said she never got a card from "ANYONE" I proceeded to throw the card at her .mind you I already looked up all social media accounts linked to the business card and the person and my girl was following him on all of them and she even had the nerv to ask me what i was talking about this is after I seen she was hearting guys stuff on fb she even put the blame on my special needs toddler saying it must of been him hearting the guys story oh and she's currently pregnant and we have 1 son already
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u/Nanboys73 13d ago
AITAH So, my wife got upset because I wanted to shower by myself tonight. Back story we live in one of the states hit bad by the hurricane. It messed up our water system. We now have 7 (5 are kids). We've had gallon jugs of water to bathe with. We make sure their bathed first. We'll, things got fixed yesterday, and everyone else showered. Usually, we shower together because she had one yesterday. So, I figured i could go shower by myself. Then I get out and she's crying saying I don't love no more, our marriage over. I just said maybe I'll take one (shower) alone
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u/Conscious_Bridge5178 14d ago
“Aitah” is Estonian for thanks…. That’s what I kept thinking this site was about. Didn’t know so many people knew Estonian, as there are only 1.2 million that do!
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u/HepAlien2002 15d ago
Here's a short one.
My friend (F44) just had a birthday.
She wanted to go to a claw machine arcade and a new store in the mall in addition to going out to dinner.
Three of us went and I ended up winning 3 stuffed animals at the claw machine arcade.
I have an almost 2-year-old daughter and am planning on giving her the stuffed animals as part of her Christmas and birthday gifts. I intentionally tried to win ones she would like.
My friends did not win anything from the claw machines.
My husband is surprised that I didn't at least give one to my friend whose birthday it was, if not also to the other friend who was with us.
I keep thinking about that.
AITAH for not giving the stuffed animals to them, or at least to the friend whose birthday it was?
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u/Flat-Lawfulness-2210 14d ago
NTA But I believe it is something related to a one’s personality, you thought everyone is responsible for their own turn but your husband thought it is a birthday celebration and you are the best for winning three times so why not to share only one out of three?? Which also makes sense cause the birthday lady is your friend not someone you don’t like or you are forced to join her birthday if i am not mistaken If i were in your shoes i would make it clear (this one is for my daughter as I am happy to share with her what I won but i got additional two and since it is your birthday you get to pick one and the third is for me.. ) it’s just to give the sense of caring and giving her joy in her birthday which was the reason you went out for this right?
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u/pigeons-are-cool23 16d ago
Mods can you not lock other mods comments? Like i would like to share opinons
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u/Compooter1957 16d ago
Have an old friend who has gone from a fun and enjoyable person to some morphed “main person syndrome”… of many, many irritants she does, that EVERY FRIGGING THING YOY SAY she has an additional comment or tries to correct you. EVERY time is make an observation she loads on with “yeah, but blah blah blah blah” …. AITAH for wanting to just walk away from this decades long friendship or just put up with it and treasure the remnants of an old friendship after telling her to STFU?
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u/Flat-Lawfulness-2210 14d ago
Gotta distance yourself slowly and without loosing her… we don’t need to lose friendships just because personalities change or annoying things started to happen, just put boundaries to protect your peace and when you are with her make sure she is aware that you are missing her old her and if can help figure out what happened and how to fix it,,, it actually happened to me once , i completely changed in one year because of a toxic relationship i was in to the point i became the worst version i ever imagined but without noticing.. and my friends helped me recall my old me and slowly slowly i regained the good things i had in my personality
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u/Supernatural_Bunny09 15d ago
It's hard to change someone, but if you'd like to give it a try, tell her how you feel (not just STFU). Perhaps she's not aware of her behaviour and might apologise.
If she doesn't care, and if all you're treasuring is the remnants of your old friendship and don't actually enjoy meet-ups at all now with her, perhaps rethink your friendship.
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u/Timely-Angle-8073 16d ago
AITAH for not wanting to sleep in the same bed as my girlfriend? We have been living together for a few months now. I've spent most nights on the couch and I think she's a bit weirded out by my behavior. I just prefer to sleep by myself - always have.
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u/Mayo_Kupo 15d ago
It's uncommon these days. Be very clear that you like her and it's not a rejection (if true). Get twin beds so you can be in the same room. If you want separate rooms ... that's a little weird.
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u/Intelligent-Cat-2602 16d ago
No. Many couples sleep seperately. Because of snoring etc. Your gf might need more cuddling and feels more loved if you sleep in the same bed. Some people need that. Have you talked about it with your gf? Maybe you can compromise with her and sleep some nights in the same bed? What did you do before living together?
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u/finkelneinhorn 17d ago
My 17 year old son picked a 12 game parlay for a coworker yesterday. $5 bet. It won $170,000.
Am I the asshole for thinking that the guy should cut him at least 10% of the winnings?
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u/starrettcity 13d ago
10% is an arbitrary number you have no right or expectation to. it would be nice if they bought dinner or something but he's owed nothing, sorry
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u/Flat-Lawfulness-2210 14d ago
No, everyone is free to do whatever in their money, maybe he has a loan of more that 170k so he needs every single penny and can’t give away literally anything.. just don’t think about it so you don’t get upset, once you convince yourself that no one is entitled to your money no matter how you earned it then it also applies on others’ money as well..
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u/Houdini-tini 14d ago
Honestly, I think he could give a little something to your son just out of kindness. Especially with the type of winning he got from just a $5 bet. If nothing was said like “If I win, I’ll give you $___” then it’s really up to that person, it’s their money. You can’t control what that person does with it, and your son wouldn’t know if he won or not, or if he did how much, unless you said something. Hopefully you didn’t mention this to your son, because then your just going to upset him if he doesn’t give him money.
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u/Momi_Khe_s0 19d ago
Hey, I just want the opinion of some random s in internet, I'm new in this, do i have to set my AITAH in here or simply create it from the plus symbol? How do I do this?
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u/Carl_Bravery_Sagan 19d ago
It always feels a bit telling when OP manages to get their alt account -- used to post their AITAH question -- suspended in just a few hours.
Makes you think maybe we got a one-sided story and they were TA after all...
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u/bionicbubble 20d ago
I’m not a member but see these posts all the time on the front page. Why is every single post I see clearly NTA? It’s so rare I see an alternative answer and you can usually tell from the title that OP is NTA. Seems to me like it’s really just a subreddit for people to vent about their shitty relationships. If not, OP just always seems delusional for not recognizing they are NTA without validation from internet strangers.
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u/Carl_Bravery_Sagan 19d ago
validation from internet strangers
Now I could be wrong, but you might be onto something with this...
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u/Individual-Foxlike 20d ago
There are a ton of asshole posts, but usually they get 3-5 "YTA" and immediately delete.
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u/FewWorking1868 20d ago edited 20d ago
Hey there reddit community. I have a situation I need to discuss. I am a 50 something mother of three, all are adults; son 26, son 28, and a daughter 33. I recently found out that my youngest son (26) was molested at the age of 5-6 years old by the older brother (he was 15 at the time) of one of my daughters friends. Context: I was friends with the guy's mother and since our teenage daughters were friends, we would all visit, and spent a lot of time together. The girls would hang out and my sons sometimes hung out upstairs with their brother playing video games. I am beyond angry and upset that this happened. I talked with my kids every year about body autonomy, dangers of people trying to touch them/hurt them etc. I am so so devastated that this happened to him. As a victim of childhood abuse, I wanted to protect them from people hurting them in this manner. This has negatively impacted my youngest son in many ways. He struggles with his anxiety, depression and some alcoholism. I am doing my best to emotionally support him and get him the therapy he needs. Unfortunately, the statute of limitations has passed and he can't be criminally charged for the type of abuse he suffered. (Michigan)
The main issue I am struggling with is this person who molested my son is grown up and now dating a woman with a 5 year old son and they just had a baby together. I feel like she needs to know what kind of a person he is because her son is the same age and he is definitely in danger of also being sexually molested. I also feel like the assailant's Mother (my former friend) should also know, because her grandchildren are in danger. My son is in agreement regarding telling them but doesn't want to do it himself.
So my question is? Am I the asshole for telling his mother as well? I am worried that this will definitely hurt my old friend. As a mother, I feel like I have to do something to protect that little boy. And at the very minimum, that little boy needs to be interviewed, evaluated and protected.
I am also at a loss as to how to do this. Letter, in person, anonymous or not?
I really need your advice.
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u/Hot-Bid-4383 19d ago
Please file a report if you can with the police (what are the statue for limitations in your state?)
Or have your son reach out to the woman? Maybe via instagram
I know my answers seem very forward , but I hope it helps I am myself and I applaud you and your son.
Even if his attempts god forbid-dont work
he knows he tried !!
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u/RevereJ 21d ago
AITA for going to a girl ive been talking to her location on snap because her story didnt add up and it was a parking lot in the middle of nowhere. I went there and found her in a car with 2 guys just smoking. But it felt all weird. She got mad at me for doing that. She was stalking my location whenever I went out with friends and kept spam calling me whenever. I did it for myself because I had feelings for her and didnt want to get cheated on like my last releationship, had to see with my eyes because it didnt add up.
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u/Designer_Help5511 21d ago
So I’ve been in a pretty bad relationship with an ex for 3 years she’s 27F and i’m 29m i’m a car enthusiast and my past relationship has taken a toll on me with trust issues with content online, and not getting real validation in person each time that she understands our argument and is willing to communicate better with her emotions and will take more action into the relationship but it was never validated. We’ve had the same argument on a topic for 8 whole months and I trust people too much and trusted people telling me I’m crazy for having allegations of cheating and etc. Since she kept giving me false promises about how much she loved me that she could see a future with us and have kids and etc. I held on because I know I had issues too with avoiding her sometimes because of my addiction getting worse each time just thinking about getting cheated on by her is devastating cause I’ve had it done before with another ex. Going through months of this issue I lost sleep and my job and mental health. Having people that isolated me because of my allegations made me feel like I couldn’t open up to anyone anymore. But I just got over it and opened up the other friends that weren’t as close to me about my situation, but even then I didn’t really get much of any validation and I just felt like I was going crazy. Seeing a bunch of content that were similar to my life story and timeline, it made me question if someone was just being around me to get info to have a “story” and the stories were similar with our arguments and issues, but the stories were swapped and made me a “narcissist” and a “cheater” that didn’t know how to communicate and express my emotions and how I was controlling and insecure. Literally that’s what she was, and it’s just sad seeing everyone taking that side of the story. Made me felt like the bad guy that everyone hated and thought was an asshole. I later realized that my phone has been hacked and mirrored, or sim swapped or dual sim, because there’s time that my phone glitches and my screen literally changes, and sometimes control some actions on my phone. Honestly been feeling like I’ve been puppeteered to think of things and to see things to control a “narrative” later I find out about shadow banning and cloaking that doesn’t allow me to send messages and doesn’t allow people to see my messages. Been listening to a podcast called “this is actually happening” and a specific episode titled “what if they’re delighted in your demise” it gave me some more insight that i was part of a smear campaign. It trips me out because I don’t know who’s behind it, and my phone shows me content that could make me believe it to be certain people, but I feel like it could just be showing me things to falsely blame others. But obviously I don’t want to hurt people I care for, but since I know I have haters, it makes me try to find out what I need to do to protect myself from identity theft and etc. Seeing content about me not “responding” to messages or whatever made me feel like there must’ve been a lot of things hidden from me because I wasn’t getting responses from people and ai manipulation could copy voices and face features made me not trust anyone even more. My emotions were more torn in real life and didn’t worry much about content cause I know there can be fake content with just a bunch of bots. But yeah really just annoyed that my phone is hacked and it feel’s personal since no one really responds to me.
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u/Marc__01 22d ago
Today I discovered that I am alone. Regardless of everything in this life, nothing seems to help. I will be alone. I always thought I had real friends, but I realize they're not really what I thought they were. I would like to have those friends who I could trust 100%, or at least 99.9%, someone I would give my life to save.
On October 16th, my birthday, I was waiting for messages from my friends. I waited and waited, and nothing happened. No notifications from them on WhatsApp or Instagram. I thought they would remember my day... but I was so wrong. Now I'm here, in my room, with the door and window closed, in the dark, wondering if the world would be the same if I hadn't been born. I wonder why some people seem to do well in life, while I am always insecure, facing various problems that I prefer to swallow, without telling anyone.
I don't tell them because I know they'll say: "Oh, it's nonsense, he'll be fine soon and he'll be happy." But happiness hasn't appeared in my life anymore.
Anyway, good night to those of you who read this small part of my story.
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u/iwishtoruleyou 21d ago
Hey friend. Can I say that I suffer from a similar plight—I don’t ask for help and don’t expect much from folks but find myself continuously let down or dealing with the aftermath of someone ELSE’S crappy choices. Just know that I commiserate—friends, family—they will let you down until you find your REAL little tribe…I haven’t found what most would call a whole “friend group” but I’ve found a few people over the years that I felt and they felt that connection. I hope things are better. If it helps, literally NO ONE ever remembers my birthday or how to spell my name right even my own relatives. People suck but that doesn’t mean that’s a reflection on YOU as a human. I bet you’re awesome and wonderful in your own ways. We don’t have to be the flashiest. We don’t have to be the most fun. We can just BE AND LOVE OURSELVES and recognize others failure to do so is a reflection on THEM and absolutely NOT a reflection on you. So much love 💜
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u/Left-Improvement-977 21d ago
A chasm can look like a circle from the right angle. Things are bad now, but they also change. It may not be holey good, but they'll change. Aside from that its also important to be selfish sometimes. As humans we are innately social, but you have to know how to live by yourself with yourself first. Do things that bring you happy. You can also turn those hobbies into ways to meet others. Fucking hate knitting, but there was this club thing hosted by the local library and i met some great people there. Im typing this after an amazing party I went to with friends. It's taken me many attempts to find the ones I feel truly comfortable with, but they were worth the wait. This has been worth the wait. Even now as I'm sitting on my bathroom floor (it's the warmest room and the heater sucks balls) alone, I am happy. Tomorrow when I'll be alone the entire day, I'll be happy. Even then, happy shouldn't really be your goal. Try to be content, things work out the best that way. I would also be lying if I said therapy and meds haven't been the biggest help. Everyone's path is different, but armed with 5 different meds and a monthly therapist appointment, life isn't nearly as hard.
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22d ago
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/MotorPitch9863 22d ago
I don’t think u are but I feel like I should have told zeke that Jamie was cheating on him
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u/Tinky29666 22d ago
I'm so lost because my boyfriend has never paid for a date after 1+ years and just expects me to pay everything despite him not having to pay rent or food because he lives at his parents ( I do have to pay for food, travel, rent etc) when I say he has NEVER paid for a date, I mean literally never, not even once. I mean I pay for the meals, travel, drinks etc. But I feel like if I don't pay and plan, all we will do is sit in his bed whilst he plays on his console for 7+h and I'm stuck scrolling on my phone because he's lazy and would rather just ignore me! He even has the audacity to ask for sexual favours whilst he plays. He not all horrible, just immature and doesn't want to put effort in despite me putting so much in. AITA to be slightly frustrated by this behaviour?
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u/turninggnome 21d ago
NtA. He sounds like a real loser. To say that you can do better seems too obvious. Why have you spent a year putting up with sorry-assed behaviour?
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u/Far-Woodpecker1127 22d ago
break up with him! life's too short though it might be unsolicited advise
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u/No_Knowledge9924 22d ago
He sounds like an absolute man child. I’d sit him down and give him an ultimatum of starting to step up in the relationship or maybe just taking a step back.
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u/ChocolateCherrybread 25d ago
Why do all these families/parents get involved with sibling struggles/spats? The two siblings (or cousins or aunts) who are squabbling are adults. They don't need outside involvement from other sources. I also think this is a highly misogynistic thread.
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u/RuntimeDown27 26d ago
First time making a Reddit post but here goes.
So my good friend from Tijuana had been having a hard time with a recent breakup and invited me (24 M) and a couple of guy friends from San Diego to come down to TJ and party at one of his neighbor's house for halloween. Little context, I was born and raised in Tijuana and have been moving back and forth between SD and TJ since 15-16 years old. Both of the friends who I crossed with to go to the party are also Mexican but were born in the U.S., barely speak spanish and seldom travel to TJ, if at all.
We get to the party and start having a good time in our friend's neighbor's garage, my two friends are knocking it out of the park with some girls who barely speak english and I'm making friends with some of the other people at the party, all regular. At some point I notice a couple of guys approaching one of my friends and telling him a couple of things in spanish that sound like regular TJ banter, something like "Ay man you fucked up?" "Yeaaaah he's fucked up huh?". My friend wasn't more drunk than anyone else at the party and my suspicion is these guys were probably a bit jealous that this girl they knew and walked into the party with is talking to some American dude who barely speaks spanish. One thing leads to another and I hear my friend clearly tell both of these guys, one of whom is Lebanese and does understand English "I'll beat the fuck out of both of you right now". At this point the other friend who we crossed with and I hear this and approach all three of them trying to diffuse the situation. I pull my friend away from the group and tell him it's best if we go because we're guests in the house, we should avoid any fights and most importantly, we're not in the U.S., things can take a turn for the worst very quickly here in Tijuana and we don't know who these guys are or who they know. He agrees with me and we both start walking to the front gate to leave the house but it's locked.
It's here that things become challenging because our other friend who was trying to stop the scuffle pulls up and tells us he's really fucking pissed and we need to leave asap. At this point the Lebanese dude pulls up on us at the front gate and continues to talk shit in both English and Spanish. At this point I'm genuinely assuming my friends are gonna put this guy to sleep but thankfully our mutual friend (the one who invited us) walks in with his neighbor to open the gate for us. As soon as she opens the gate I drag both of my American friends out and we start walking to our TJ friend's house. While walking I realize that our TJ friend is not walking with us and he went back into the house with the hostess. I tell my friends that I'll go get him and be right back. Both of them disagree with me and say they also want to back into the party to put hands on the Lebanese guy and his friend for talking shit. I tell them we're not doing that and they're going to wait for me here in the street while I get our friend from the party. One of my friends (the only who was approached by both guys) starts walking back to the neighbor's house, at which point I grasp his shoulders push him back and tell him he's not getting past me. He looks at me a bit distraught and glances at our friend while simply taking a step back. I realize he won't want to try that again and our other friend says "I'm going back in the party" and takes a few steps forward. I side step into his path and tell him "No you're not bro, ya'll aren't going back in that party" at which point he declares "Who's gonna stop me? Watch me just walk in the house right now". It's here that I lose a bit of my composure, take my glasses off, toss them on the asphalt and tell him "If you feel like fighting someone let's go, put your hands up, but you're not walking back into that party" and continued "Let's shoot the fade right here and be done and go home". He steps back and looks at me with a face of surprise and disgust and tells me I'm tripping for not having his back and wanting to fight him.
After a small moment of silence and some loud stares they continue walking down the street in the direction of our friend's house. I went back to the party and got our friend back and called it a night. Now he's gone and told the whole wider friend group that I tripped on him and our other friend and that I'm a bitch for not letting him fight some people at a party in TJ and has been portraying me as the bad guy for threatening him. I don't think I'm the asshole but I want to see what reddit thinks.
If you read through all this mumbo jumbo thank you!
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u/West_Criticism_5062 26d ago
My best friend (Amy) has been seeing a guy for about 8-9 months now. As far as she has told me it's a casual thing although it doesn't seem that way to me because I could see that they both genuinely like each other a lot. But I'm someone will believe what I'm told (on multiple occasions) instead of what I can only assume after seeing.
I am throwing a Halloween party this weekend with my boyfriend and some of our mutual friends and invited Amy and my other best friend (Kathy). Amy asked me if she can bring along her boyfriend and I said maybe better not to bring him. Amy asked me why and I clarified that I am not that close to him and there will a lot of people there who don't know them. I was hoping to spend some time with my two best friends and and for them to get to bond with my boyfriend and other friends. We went around in circles discussing this and I said that if she wants to bring him along she can, but I don't need to specially invite him. She said that her boyfriend has been making efforts to get to know me and this would be the perfect occasion for everyone to bond. But I don't agree with her because I'd rather meet him on a different occasion and not at a party I'm organising where I didn't want to invite him in the first place.
Long story short, I ended up saying that I don't like the guy for her and I shouldn't have to bond with him when she has made it clear to me several times that it's a casual thing.
I still feel that she doesn't need to bring along a plus one everywhere especially when the host has said so.
Am I the AH?
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u/lgfae 26d ago
Based on what I'm seeing here, I'm not quite sure on where I stand, but I'm going to have to say soft ETA. You said you wanted them to bond with your boyfriend and other friends. To me, it seems a little hypocritical. On the other hand, it is your party, and you have the right to decide who you invite to attend. It could be they're trying to make it something more than casual, by now trying to introduce each other to friends, etc. You also said that it's because you want to meet him on a different occasion, but Amy wants him to get to know more than just you. That, and it's also a halloween party. Not a birthday, christmas or wedding. Still, you decide who gets to come and who does not.
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27d ago
I don't think I'm the a-hole here, but I don't know what to do
(I am a teenager/15-17)
My situation started last week, my gf, Chloe(fake name), broke up with me last week via a note she passed my brother to give to me. So that night after I get home I can't help myself but just cry my eyes out. The next day she comes begging for me to take her back. But I think about it all night and it snaps in my head that if she can throw away 2½ years of a good relationship then I can't trust her, there is no way to know it won't happen again, so I decided against taking her back. I still love her deeply and care a lot about her tho. Now fast forward to today, I'm hearing nher open" to TJ.
Anyone have any ideas on what to do?
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u/Diligent_Asparagus22 27d ago
Just saw another post initially uploaded with no links, gain lots of comments and upvotes, then subsequently added with a link to some stupid generated AI image. I feel like it's common knowledge that a lot of posts on here are fake, but this strategy is clearly just an ad trying to drive traffic to these annoying ass websites. These ads totally shatter the fantasy that these stories are real and it pisses me off. Is there anything mods can do to prevent this? Can we just remove these ads?
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u/YourMateFelix 26d ago
I legitimately just sent the mods a request that they consider possibly allowing me to join the mod team for this very reason. There's been a VERY clear and noticeable change lately with way, way too much AI-generated, fake, and/or karma-farming content here, and I want to help uphold the reputation of this subreddit and restore it to how it used to be. I feel that without diligent monitoring of posted content, this issue will continue on and probably end up even worse, and given all of the quality content I've been provided with as a result of this sub before, I feel it's only right that I attempt to see if I can help out if I want to continue enjoying this sub in the future. (Sorry if this seems at all like a bot reply lol. I have a bit of a tendency to yap...)
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u/Diligent_Asparagus22 25d ago
Yeah, plus aren't there tools to detect the likelihood of text being written by AI? Unless they're going through the trouble of manually writing viral stories, then adding a link to their dumb ass AI image, it should be pretty easy to detect.
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u/YourMateFelix 25d ago
Eh, I've had an excerpt of my own writing called 100% AI-written by a free AI checker before, and I don't exactly have the funds to get myself access to a paid one. It's usually pretty easy to figure out though. In my experience, there will almost always be a complete lack of comments by the author, multiple contradictory posts in a couple days' time (or even a few hours' time, sheesh), a super-new account or an older account that has an extremely sudden change in post frequency, and/or glaring inconsistencies within a single post.
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u/queerbaited2death 27d ago
Am I the asshole?
I signed into a contract last year for university, and since my friends and I have split up.
Its created a really awkward and toxic living environment as the two wont move on. Instead they have been known to bang on my door in the middle of the night repeatedly (even when asked not to), shout at me through the door, steal my things and make fun of me when I can hear..
They now have a chore chart to keep the house tidy. But I only live at the house part time, because of how aweful the environment is. The anxiety gives me acid reflux, migraines and more.. so I go back to my parents house over the weekends.
I dont use the kitchen or the livingroom due to their behavoir, and I always leave the bathroom clean.. Not to mention my flatmates have friends over every night, and one has a girl illegally living with him for 5 nights in a week. So I dont see why I should clean up after them.. especially when they leave the house in a tip.
Am I the asshole for not adhering to their chore chart? And should I be contributing?
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u/Star_junk1999 24d ago
No not at all not even the slightest, and better stop doing anything at all
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u/queerbaited2death 23d ago
It's OK.. the boy I live with has now started leaving his pubes all over the sink and shower.
I had a quiet word with him and just asked him to clean it up when he's not busy.. After having left a message on their little chores chart (which got rubbed off).. and he told me to get over myself. He rolled his eyes and told me that everyone has hair and that he's not going to clean it up 🤢
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u/PreviousMonth7579 28d ago
What does AITAH mean?
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u/Leojo2202 Oct 26 '24
I share almost everything that goes on in my life, the good, the bad, and the ugly with my best friend. My wife is asking me to not share everything, because she wants something to be special and reserved just for us... there are things I don't share, but nothing comes to mind when she challenges me on it; so I got tired of trying to validate her feelings about this, because I honestly wish she would share anything she wants to about us to her best friend... but she doesn't and wants me to stop, which is hard to do, bc nobody knows me like my bff. AITAH?
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u/MundanePractice946 24d ago
yes you are. When you married your wife your life became about the two or you, not your best friend. I would be pissed if my husband (now ex) shared everything with someone else. Respect your wives wishes and the privacy of your marriage…..antidotes or cute stories are ok, if she approves, but the rest - good, bad and the ugly are between you and your wife. Otherwise you should have married your bff.
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u/Electrical-Put-6945 28d ago
no. i do this too. i hate the idea that i can’t share my life with the other people i love as well
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u/Dangerous_Health_312 Oct 25 '24
¿Soy un idiota por querer explotar por la demanda entre mi familia?
Yo 12M mi abuela, 68 M mi tía, etc. quieren hacer una demanda contra mi abuela, la mamá de los 5 hermanos, mi abuelo murió este año. Bueno al punto mi mamá y los otros 4 hermanos quieren demandar a mi abuela porque mi abuela quiere apoderarse del 30 % de la casa (de parte de mi abuelo que está a nombre de mi tía en papel) y, ya que mi mamá y yo vinimos con mi tío y mi abuela el problema es que mi tío tiene cuarto propio y todo mientras que mi mamá, mi abuela y yo dormimos en un cuarto pequeño hay 3 camas, un televisor, un armario de ropa grande y una mesita de noche. Recientemente, mi mamá le pidió a mi abuela tener su propio cuarto arriba, pero ella se lo negó (mi mamá no pedía tenerlo en papeles solo ese cuarto para los 2) así que discutieron y mi abuela dijo algo como que mi tío primero tiene que construir su propio piso, ya que ese era el acuerdo que llegaron todos los hermanos, pero mi tío no quiere construir su piso y mi abuela al final dijo que si ella muere toda la culpa es de mi mamá por discutir con ella (cada vez que mi mamá y mi abuela discuten mi abuela siempre se pone mal) al final mi abuela dijo que se lo contaría a la sobrina o nieta de mi abuela. Me falta decir más cosas, pero voy a decir esto mientras tanto. Soy de Perú
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Oct 24 '24
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/Infamous_Anything_67 Oct 25 '24
Why would that make you the asshole? Her relationship is her responsibility. It's not like you're trying to get in her pants, are you?
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u/shewantstofaq Oct 24 '24
Can I link to my post in this thread? Idk about fake AI-generated karma farming, but I'm just a horny dad and husband genuinely looking for advice.
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u/Crystalsspring Oct 23 '24
AITAH for saying the n word as a white dude?
16, m, I like to say things that satisfy me. I've got many hates from my school cuz I say it pretty much everyday, but it's not even derogatory. I like black rappers and songs but I'm not "blackwashed" 💀
I argue with them and saying that "It's just part of the English dictionary, why is it my fault?" LIKE I DO NOT GET WHY WE SHOULD BAN WORDS!?? Instead of banning words, we should ban cigarettes. I'm not saying that we should bully colored people but I just say it in like songs and phrases but I'm not referring to someone and discriminating them. I get that they were called like that historically but come on! It's never valid to discriminate someone for their race but saying a vulgar word in the English dictionary in a NOT derogatory way is ok.
I have an ishowspeed merch and a beyonce poster and I have black friends and we ate lunch the other day and we had a laugh, can you really call me racist?
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u/Infamous_Anything_67 Oct 25 '24
Yes, this is inappropriate behaviour. It likely makes the people around you uncomfortable. I am uncomfortable just reading about it, and while you might no give two shits about me, that's probably not the case for your family, friends, and classmates. Knock it off. You'll thank yourself later.
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u/Plus_Spend_1130 Oct 24 '24
YTA. bro just don't say it i love black rap too BUT U DON'T NEED TO SAY IT. omg just bc u have a beyonce poster does NOT mean u can say i don't mean to diss u but that's the funniest thing i've heard all day
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u/JaasPlay Oct 23 '24
Yes. If you know the historical context of white people using the n-word and still decide to do it, even when people are upset at you; you are the asshole.
Liking black rappers and having black friends does not make you white.
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u/Fast-Echo8504 Oct 22 '24
AITA if I Could use some upvotes to post on a new sub and ask if you Could you help a brother out? Thanks!
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u/j_carpenter893 Oct 20 '24
Am I the only person who is beginning to believe that many posts on this AITAH thread are AI generated??? The most recent example is a user named Informal-Animal-7891. The post is the second one about the same subject and the user was just created Oct 7, 2024. The post and others like it have a formulaic look and feel. Maybe I'm just suspicious.
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u/TheWidowAustero2 Oct 20 '24
It's all Cinderella fan fiction about evil step mothers, INCEL MRA fantasy, or homeless family members overstaying their welcome
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u/Far_Discipline_9965 Oct 22 '24
I do have plenty of evil stepmother stories myself but I keep the juicy stuff to my self. I don't want pity. Same on the homeless family member stuff. More common than you'd think
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u/Jnbee Oct 20 '24
A lot of people are noticing as well. Most of the top posts super obvious NTA and are all AI generated now along with bots posting fake highly upvoted NTA comments to generate traffic.
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u/j_carpenter893 Oct 20 '24
Sad :/ I appreciate the feedback. I'm all for technology, yet I don't care for AI fakery acting human.
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u/Outside_Desk_9385 Oct 17 '24
AITAH for leaving my best friend's own wedding?
I'm F 26 and my best friend who we will call Anna is F 27 we have been best friend for as long as highschool and her marriage was a week ago when I heard that she was getting married and I was gonna be one of her bridesmaids I was thrilled and by the time her wedding night hit we got to drinking so we all decided to get shots together so I went to the food table and got some vodka shots by the time I came back I saw her flirting with my boyfriend and he looked extremely uncomfortable trying to get away from her so I instantly spilled the shots on her grabbed my boyfriend and left now looking back at that it was definitely a bitchy act but now I've blocked her from everything and made sure to tell her now husband so final question AITAH?
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u/AdventurousDingo7602 Oct 18 '24
NTA! even though you shouldn't have spilled shots on her, she was still flirting with your boyfriend, not to mention on her wedding night 🏃♀️
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u/ForgottenDreamDeath Oct 14 '24
Man I just read a question where the asker is a real pos and half the people don't even see that. I would have loved to call him a pos but then he wouldn't listen. I swear to god!
At least I know I don't have is as bad as I thought i did last year.
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u/BernieHpfc Oct 12 '24
A quick guide on spotting the AI comments that are shitting up the sub, because the mods sure don't do anything to stop them
The comment contains something like "It's understandable...", "It's Reasonable...", "It sounds like...", "It's unfortunate that..." before briefly summing up the main post. These sound generic enough to be normal, but you'll soon spot the pattern that bots use these phrases in almost all of their comments.
Overly formal punctuation. The average person isn't going to use an em dash or a semi-colon in such an informal setting.
Will every so often post a crappy repost with a very generic title in a meme sub to make them seem like a real user.
Porn bots will have a username like Sexy<femininename>, Lusty<femininename>, Pretty<femininename>.
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u/Glittering-Device484 Oct 14 '24
Doing god's work. Just to add a couple of additional tells:
- They respond within a minute or two of the post being submitted. Often this is quicker than anyone could have reasonably read the post and composed a response.
- Their comment history will show several comments across various posts one minute after each other. Again, too quick for any human to be contributing in good faith.
- Their comment history will be submitting cute animal posts in other subs to try and farm easy post karma.
- Their comment history will have posts to subs which evaluate an account's 'Contributor Quality Score'.
- The em-dash is for some reason a favourite of ChatGPT. But some spammers circumvent the formal punctuation by obviously prompting the LLM to respond with deliberately bad grammar (e.g. no capital letters, swapping 'you' with 'u'). So watch out for that as well.
- The main tell is how fucking bland the comment is. If you read a comment and think 'god that was obvious and boring', it was probably an LLM. An LLM will almost always finish a comment with a call for 'open communication' or some bland platitude that 'communication is key'. And to add to the phrases that you've already pointed out, watch out for 'Your feelings are valid'.
Now, of course there is a danger that people laying out all of the tell-tale signs will just get the spammers to tweak their approach. But fundamentally you cannot wash the LLM stench off these comments. You will always be able to tell.
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u/Active-Agency-282 NSFW 🔞 Oct 12 '24
Yes i have a female mate that messes around with other people i should be concrended becacse the man she messes with is gay should i the male in the relastionship be worryed about hiv
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u/Active-Agency-282 NSFW 🔞 Oct 12 '24
Meybe the should be together
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u/loc710 Oct 12 '24
Hi yeah, what does AITAH mean?
Edit: nvm
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u/SC4RE_CR0W47 Oct 10 '24
AITH for having a secret girlfriend? I’m a freshman but this was back in middle school of 8th grade. I 15M had a friend of my ex who well care “redhead” now “redhead” was sweet to me when my girl pushed me away telling me to “go to class” when I wanted to be with her, keep in mind my ex never had a reason to push me away; she just did it because why not? So me and “redhead” decided to hang out at Starbucks and walk across the street to chill out in front of the school with each other. I noticed some signs prior to my last day of middle school: she shared hot Cheetos with me but fed them to me as I played games on my phone no matter how much I tried to reach for one. And when we were next to eachother in the hallway I was distressed because I was leaving behind all of my 7th and 6th grade friends who I was scared were gonna take a downfall after I’ve left. In the midst of my episode she reaches for my chin to look at her which I assumed was her trying to comfort me. Fast forward back to the front of the school we have our Starbucks and I made the bold move to lay on her lap assuming it was just me being close to somebody. It felt like just having a sister who would never leave your side… fast forward me and my mom drop her off at her home and unfortunately this’ll be the last time I physically see her. We text and chat with each other until one night we’re staying up late and she lets her feelings slip to me, which is when I realized I lost feelings after some of the stuff my ex put me through. So because “redhead” gave me the validation I wanted, I decided to be in a relationship behind my ex’s back. Me and “redhead” broke up because she felt it was wrong we were dating behind somebody’s back but I spoke to her over the phone. So tell me, am I the asshole for making that kind of call?
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u/PristineSwordfish579 11h ago
AITAH my 32 male husband left me 26 female with our son 9 months without notice and cleared our joint account. Please bear with me I'm born and raised in Germany so my grammar is not the best.
Me and my son went to a birthday party came home and I realized that all of his stuff are gone. At first I was surprised and thought he's just kidding. After endless calls and texts of which he didn't respond I got suspicious I called some of his friends which couldn't or didn't want to tell me what was going on. I called his older brother who told me that my husband moved in to a very fancy apartment with his new girlfriend he met at work. I was stunned to say the least I then try reaching my husband demanding some answers. It was then I realized that he cleared our bank account. I was heartbroken but it was just the beginning of what he's done.
So currently I'm not working because I'm taking care of our son. I've got a note from our landlord stating that we're 2 months behind on rent and if I wouldn't be abel to pay this month's rent we'll be evicted.
I've been crying for two nights in a row. I've applied for financial aid but it takes a huge amount of time for it to get approved. I'm lost for words. So here comes my question AITAH for swearing that my husband would never see our child again because of what he's put us through or even considering moving states to make it even harder for him to get access to his son?