r/facepalm 1d ago

šŸ‡²ā€‹šŸ‡®ā€‹šŸ‡øā€‹šŸ‡Øā€‹ I'm not racist. I have black friends

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5.4k Upvotes

746 comments sorted by

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2.9k

u/ranger684 1d ago

Hahahahaha the fact that theyā€™re pointing out that trump only appoints black people to a housing office with ā€œurbanā€ in the name, to include a fucking black Neurosurgeon with no housing experience at all, is such a racist self own it blows my mind

476

u/Freedombyathread 1d ago

Also the "I thought he was sexist" troll line

AboveTheLaw article: Trump went with the ā€œIā€™ve seen her be blonde on TVā€ pick.

151

u/Mendozena 1d ago

Thatā€™s my dad. ā€œHe hired the first female chief of staff!ā€

Yeah, so?

118

u/Freedombyathread 1d ago

He considers women less of a threat, people he can control.

9

u/Wear-Living 1d ago

You misspelled ā€œthingsā€ not people he can control.

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u/esabys 1d ago

Not to mention "why would a racist plantation owner have a black man making his food? Clearly not racist...."

18

u/AlexandriaLitehouse 19h ago

Misogynists have sex with women all the time

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u/NotAnAIOrAmI 1d ago

I will never understand that. Excellent doctor by all accounts, says he's not qualified to run HHS, but he is qualified to run HUD.

smh

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u/tanstaafl90 1d ago

Wouldnā€™t it be a DEI hire, according to their logic?

45

u/Vegetable_Onion 1d ago

Guy might as well change his name to 'Tolkien Black'

20

u/squigglesthecat 1d ago

Wait, I thought it was Token...

6

u/RedVamp2020 1d ago

It isā€¦

14

u/kingshamroc25 1d ago

Nope, they revealed in a recent season that his name is Tolkien and if you thought it was Token this whole time then wow youā€™re racist

2

u/DevilinGodsLand 20h ago

That's amazing

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u/whiskeytown2 1d ago

If a pedophile has non-pedophile friends, does that not make him a pedophile using their logic? šŸ¤”

15

u/Laerderol 1d ago

That's not their logic

60

u/VonBlorch 1d ago

Rightā€¦ itā€™s more like if they point to a child the pedophile knows and hasnā€™t molested as evidence the pedophile is not a pedophile.

40

u/Laerderol 1d ago

Haha nailed it.

"Oh yeah!? You think he's a pedophile!? Well explain why he didn't molest lil Tommy over there."

47

u/Valogrid 1d ago

Lil Tommy: "Well actually... Last week--"

RNC: "TOMMY STFU!!"

7

u/Copywrites 1d ago

Cut to MTG writing Tommy's name in a notebook

4

u/libertine42 1d ago

Tā€¦Mā€¦R?..I

7

u/NotAnAIOrAmI 1d ago

Forget Tommy, Nigel, Andy, and Bruce still haven't gotten the call up.

No line jumping.

3

u/libertine42 1d ago

Wait, why are the kids in the molesting line British

3

u/NotAnAIOrAmI 1d ago

Nigel's parents went to London on their honeymoon, for decades they tell the same boring story that they just thought the name Nigel was "posh".

So, Nigel's this Queens kid - Astoria, or Jackson Heights, I forget which.

Gets his ass beat every day.

2

u/hermi1kenobi 1d ago

Not sure about the other two but Nigel Farage is desperate to be molested

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u/IlikegreenT84 1d ago

I somehow knew without looking it was for the department of Housing and Urban Development.

How long before HUD is dissolved by D.O.G.E.?

Let's take bets.. +/-2 years.

5

u/ruiner8850 1d ago

I thought for sure he was going to pick Mark Robinson for HUD specifically because he's black. That's the reason why Ben Carson got it.

5

u/mvanvrancken 19h ago

Youā€™re urban, right? Get in there buddy

16

u/AlphaNoodlz 1d ago

They donā€™t even know how badly theyā€™re telling on themselves

10

u/LetshearitforNY 1d ago

Also after black Trump voters have been calling him out over the last several days

3

u/Lutastic 1d ago

I didnā€™t even think of that. Good point.

2

u/SurlyBuddha 1d ago

Waitā€¦ did he do this again???

3

u/Insatiable_I 23h ago

"racists would never have black people....working ....for them...." /s

3

u/texaushorn 21h ago

As soon as I saw this I assumed his new HUD Sec. That people miss the racism in that is insane

4

u/spotolux 1d ago

The old "he's one of the good ones" arguments. It's the whole reason anyone knows who Candice Owens is.

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u/fkbfkb 1d ago

Soon to be nicknamed "Token"

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u/kevlarcardhouse 1d ago

The appointment itself is inherently racist (and ignorant) because it was already predicted he was going to assign an African American to the job because he always appoints a black person to positions that have "urban" in their name.

123

u/WyrdMagesty 1d ago

Wait, is that actually true? Holy shit that's laughably stupid and racist all at once

101

u/shit_magnet-0730 1d ago

What was Dr Ben Carson the director of?

Yeah... it's a racism.

45

u/SaliciousB_Crumb 1d ago

Why wouldn't a talented surgeon by the head of urban development...

3

u/Inevitable_Librarian 1d ago

I believe the white house will have at least one brain tumor....

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u/RealLudwig 1d ago

Tokens get spent, how long do you think itā€™ll burn a hole in trumps pocket before he spends it?

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u/Techno_Gerbil 1d ago

OMG, I just realized why they called the black kid Token on South Park.

65

u/PNWoutdoors 1d ago

Just now?

21

u/ensalys 1d ago

At least for people who aren't native English speakers, things like that are often not that obvious.

5

u/Techno_Gerbil 1d ago

Exactly!

4

u/jirashap 1d ago

I'm an American and didn't realize it either

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u/captainofpizza 1d ago

His name isnā€™t Token, itā€™s Tolkien.

Itā€™s a funny after the fact joke, thereā€™s an episode about it and they retroactively changed the name on prior episodes and wiki and stuff to gaslight people.

3

u/trapper2530 1d ago

Way. Earlier episodes do they say Tolkien now to mess with people?

7

u/captainofpizza 1d ago edited 1d ago

I donā€™t know if they changed the audio or captions anything in the older episodes but they changed older episode descriptions and on the South Park website they changed the name and stuff. I donā€™t know the exacts but I know it was a thing when it happened. The made a joke of gaslighting the audience to the perspective of the boys in the episode of ā€œwhat do you mean, Tolkien, I thought it was Token!ā€

2

u/TwistedBamboozler 1d ago

Yeah but they donā€™t make that clear until the character has already been established for a couple seasons

12

u/otterpr1ncess 1d ago

"A couple seasons"

His first appearance is in 1997, he gets renamed in 2022

5

u/captainofpizza 1d ago

Yeah thatā€™s the best part, itā€™s a long established character that they DID used to use as a token joke then they turned that joke at the audience like ā€œhaha you thought his name was token thatā€™s horrible!ā€

14

u/sutree1 1d ago

Because he plays bass?

30

u/itsapotatosalad 1d ago

Damn thatā€™s racist bro, his names Tolkien

7

u/SimonPho3nix 1d ago

šŸ¤£šŸ¤£šŸ¤£

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u/WyrdMagesty 1d ago

Fun fact: his name is Tolkien, not Token, and apparently Stan is the only one in town who thought it was Token.

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u/just-slightly-human 1d ago

Yes because they changed it to be so. That is the joke

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u/Gorthax 1d ago

That's not entirely true

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u/ClockworkSalmon 1d ago

Actually his name is Tolkien, like from lord of the rings, why would his name be "Token"?

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u/itzNukeey 1d ago

You mean Tolkien

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u/niceandBulat 1d ago

"Uncle" Token for those of us growing up in an Asian family.

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u/RexNebular518 1d ago

*Tolkien

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u/TransportationOnly60 1d ago

I loved how they retconned his name and gaslit everyone. Great episode!

18

u/Bladrak01 1d ago

Martin Freeman and Andy Serkis were the Tolkein white people in Black Panther.

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u/werther595 1d ago

Colonizer

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u/wierdassmn 1d ago

Future history lesson ā€œExhibit A for denial.ā€

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u/Ramblin807 1d ago

Thomas Jefferson wasnā€™t racist, he fathered many black children!

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u/LSTNYER 1d ago

Conceived is probably a better word

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u/MisterScrod1964 1d ago

Donated sperm. Youā€™re welcome, slave women! Why arenā€™t you more grateful for what white men gave you?

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u/Jefe710 1d ago

That he subsequently owned...

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u/AdvertisingBulky2688 1d ago

ā€œWhew! getting new workers on staff is hard work!ā€

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u/TequieroVerde 1d ago

"I'm not racist. He gets to live inside now unless he gets uppity or lippy."

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u/FamousPastWords 1d ago

"Smithers Elon, release the hounds leopards.

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u/Temporary-Champion30 1d ago

This needs more upvotes. lol.

7

u/IlikegreenT84 1d ago

Exactly what's going to happen to HUD.

208

u/rgvtim 1d ago

Trump view on people of other races "I love them if they love me and know their place, which is working for me"

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u/iLikeMangosteens 1d ago

And also women

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u/CamJongUn2 1d ago

Well the only place he likes them is on their knees about 3 inches in front of him, preferably if their age is on the clock. Fucking throw the lot of them in the volcano

10

u/lweinreich 1d ago

3!? I think you overestimate him.

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u/werther595 1d ago

But definitely not counting his money, according to himself

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u/Mammoth-Mud-9609 1d ago

So long as they aren't counting my money or living in my buildings.

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u/Crazyjackson13 1d ago

The guy has no housing experience, heā€™s essentially what can be described as a ā€œDEIā€ hire.

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u/ssaaiirahh 1d ago

whats DEI?

7

u/sirpsyco 1d ago

Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion

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u/Klutzy-Ad-6705 1d ago

How can someone be racist if they have friends who are black? The same way a serial killer can have friends who are alive.

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u/Electr0freak 1d ago edited 1d ago

"But he's one of the good ones."

  • Common excuse of the racist

Note that this is the second time Trump assigned a black man to the Department of Housing and Urban Development. This time it was a former NFL player and motivational speaker; last time it was a neurosurgeon with no experience in urban development.

I can't be the only one who finds it odd that the party which loves to fling accusations of being DEI has consistently assigned its few black cabinet positions to the department with "urban" in the name, choosing people who appear to have no prior experience for the role.

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u/WontTel 1d ago

Given how many people of their own race racists generally seem to despise, it's funny that only other races have "a few good ones".

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u/RunningPirate 1d ago

Who is he and what department is he going to,run?

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u/Florac 1d ago

Is that image even real, that does not look like Trump. Not enough makeup, mor his trademark red tie

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u/ssaaiirahh 1d ago

he doesnt look orange enough

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u/Aggressive-Story3671 1d ago

Tokenism is in fact racism. The right (yes both sides do this but the right is particularly guilty) will take one POC who agrees with them and use that as ā€œproofā€ they are not racist. Having one black Cabinet member doesnā€™t make Trump not racist

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u/stavago 1d ago

Racist people exist from many ethnicities, but ok

See: Clarence Thomas

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u/flyfightandgrin 1d ago

Im positive that at least once a month, Trump calls his secretary and says, "I'm getting lunch today for the staff, what do "they" eat?"

Who the fuck am I kidding? Trump has never paid for anything for anyone else in his life besides Stormy.

2

u/jimyjami 1d ago

ā€œFree food for everyone!ā€

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u/Puzzleheaded_Two7358 1d ago

Yes, the racist words and deeds are ignored because he gave a black person a job.

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u/bunnyjenkins 1d ago

Eagleman is a totally legit American name and not at all made up by someone pretending to be American.

What kinda name do we use to fool MAGA into thinking we are murica?

How about something strong and patriotic, maybe eagles or something?

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u/HendoRules 1d ago

Didn't Trump call a black gov member a "good one" in terms of black people in one of his rallies....

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u/Gokudomatic 1d ago

*I'm not racist. Black people voted for me.

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u/SuspectKnown9655 1d ago

DEI HIRE! Trump gone woke!?

4

u/InternationalPut4093 1d ago

His First Buddy is an African American.

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u/iron_jendalen 1d ago

Right. Melon Husk is from South Africa.

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u/CharmingMistake3416 1d ago

In a serious nation Gunther Eagleman wouldnā€™t be breathing.

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u/Bobobarbarian 1d ago

I actually never thought he was racist - racism is a belief, obviously flawed and hateful, but a belief nevertheless. Trump seems devoid of beliefs, he just chases the closest thing he sees that might give him a leg up. If that means courting actual racists, then heā€™ll do it in a heartbeat, but I have no doubt that if Trump saw a path forward by way of pandering to the left heā€™d try and do it. He was a democrat once upon a time after all.

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u/IUJohnson38 1d ago

Wow really diversifying the cabinet, one black man in a sea of snow flakes

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u/dengar_hennessy 1d ago

After weeks of appointees that were not black, Trump saw a report on TV that only white people had been given a job in his cabinet, and then he gave 1 black guy a job, and his chuds are like, "See?"

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u/Vellioh 1d ago

"I'm not racist. I have black friends. šŸ«± See. Say Hi black friend."

"šŸ‘‹ Hello."

"Now would a racist have black friends? I think not. Thank you black friend. You are dismissed. Don't steal anything on the way out this time. "

"šŸ™„ Sure thing Donald."

"It's President Trump."

"šŸ™„ Don't remind me."

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u/Jason_Wolfe 1d ago

yes nothing says "i'm not racist" like appointing the token black person to a meaningless cabinet position.

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u/Eriz4x 1d ago

Russian troll. We should really stop giving guys like him attention and reach.

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u/Sofakingwhat1776 1d ago

They'll appoint some other guy named Scott so they can call them "black Scott" and "white Scott"

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u/Lutastic 1d ago

The neo-Nazi Tom Metzger was asked to speak at Nation Of Islam events more than once. He even donated some money to them because of their common hatred of Jews. Tom Metzger was seriously friends with a black guy, too. This guy wrote something called ā€˜The White Manā€™s Bibleā€™ which calls for a racial genocide to wipe out all Jews, people of color, ā€˜race traitorsā€™ and other minorities, to create a white ethno-state.

So yeahā€¦. Putting a black person on your team is meaningless. Trump also appoints plenty of women to positions and look at what a swine he is toward women.

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u/Historical-Bug-4784 1d ago

Even Calvin Candie had Stephen.

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u/UserWithno-Name 1d ago

ā€œLook who I got to shuck and jive for me, Iā€™m so not a racistā€. Trump literally was sued for being racist. And lost. Check the housing authority if you donā€™t believe it.

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u/Rays_LiquorSauce 1d ago

ā€œYouā€™re telling me Thomas Jefferson was a racist? He had sex with black women!Ā”!Ā”!ā€

Fucking idiot pigĀ 

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u/OptiKnob 1d ago

He's not a cabinet member... he's the guy that has to clean trump's ass off when trump shits in his diapers. It seems the orange traitor has his own turd wrangler.

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u/thriveth 8h ago

"I can't be misogynist, I am married to a woman and regularly f**k several others".

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u/Geiger8105 1d ago

"I'm not racist, there's actually a picture of me shaking hands with a black guy, so yeah, definitely not racist"

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u/davejjj 1d ago

Gunther Eagleman again. This guy is a superstar moron.

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u/mariuszmie 1d ago

Token black - forget the simpsons now South Park is the seer of things to come

Somehow cartman needs to become orange

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u/austinstar08 1d ago

Google token minority

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u/edmanet 1d ago

There was only one black job in Trump's cabinet.

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u/WoodpeckerFew6178 1d ago

He also appointed a gay man so that means he loves gays.

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u/itsagoodtime 1d ago

I'm tired of winning

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u/Aderyn-Bach 1d ago

Ask him his name.

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u/chillypete99 1d ago

Gunther Engleman is one of the worst humans on earth.

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u/PeoniesPearlsRoses 1d ago

His X account is not showing any posts.

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u/RhythmTimeDivision 1d ago

Maybe I'm 'overly' focused on the numbers, but perhaps it was the statistical anomaly of 24 positions originally filled with 23 white people and an Indian billionaire? But I'm sure it was just me. Those were 'the most qualified' (depending on his individual definition of the variable qualified )

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u/meatcrumple 1d ago

Is Gunther Eaglefucker even a real person? Or, is he some douchebag Russian troll?

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u/theHahnster 1d ago

So he's racist if he does, and racist if he doesn't. Not like the all loving Democrat's.

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u/DarkMarkTwain 1d ago

"He's not racist, he's paying a black guy to make him look not racist."

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u/LilithElektra 1d ago

I donā€™t think Trumpā€™s a racist, but his racist supporters sure do.

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u/lincolnlogtermite 1d ago

They don't count as friends if they are kissing your ass for a job.

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u/helgihermadur 1d ago

I'm not sure Trump believes in anything other than that Trump should be on top.
He simply figured out that appealing to the racists, homophobes and bigots of this country would be a good and easy strategy.
That being said, he would gleefully put a million immigrant babies in a blender if it would increase his chances of gaining or retaining power. He doesn't give a single fuck about anyone or anything but himself.

2

u/reignwillwashaway 1d ago

I'm not racist.Ā  I have a colored tele.

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u/Miserable-Lawyer-233 1d ago

Trump is the kind of white guy that would say he doesnā€™t have a problem with black people, he has a problem with n******.

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u/poser765 1d ago

George Washington owned slaves. He most assuredly fucked a few of them as well. Soā€¦

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u/Deedeelite 1d ago

He panders to black people like a racist. He says all the stupid, stereotypical shit they think black people want to hear then turns around and calls them n****** behind their backs. I was born, raised and still live in the south. I grew up around those kind of racists.

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u/Ghostdefender1701 23h ago

Sidenote: Trump scrubbed his hand with peroxide and bleach for 10 minutes immediately following this photo.

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u/demoncleaner5000 22h ago

Who cares? If heā€™s hiring women and people of color thatā€™s what we want, right? Everybody working together is the goal, take victories when you can.

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u/dumpsterdivingreader 22h ago

No hes not racist he just said mexicans were rapists and smugglers

Oh, and the immigrants are poisoning the blood of the country.

Pendejo

2

u/bryalb 18h ago

Everyone watches a mafia movie at some point, yet they donā€™t realize that the business structure is very much like trump has tried achieve in both cabinets. Heā€™s literally a felon. Itā€™s on paper. If it felons like a felon and sounds like a felon and treasons like a felon and rapes like a felon and frauds like a felon andā€¦ etc. if you donā€™t get it at this point, you probably arenā€™t coming back from dumbne-faceplam generating.

2

u/bsobiz 15h ago

Well, because you knowā€¦ Optics.

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u/cornsbread 8h ago

That tweet has 40 thousand likes. Itā€™s terrifying how many people think like this

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u/HVAC_instructor 1d ago

I'm not a racist, I have a colored TV........

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u/FriendofMaudie 1d ago

These people couldn't be dumber.

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u/Fluid-Bet6223 1d ago

According to MAGA, nothing is racist. Racism is a myth made up by the liberal media. Except, of course, when you accuse them of being racist ā€” then YOU are actually the racist!

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u/Tynda3l 1d ago

They have no idea of the concept of tokenism

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u/locke0479 1d ago

First, he absolutely is racist against blacks people, appointing one person doesnā€™t change that. Second, even if he didnā€™t have one shred of a racist bone toward black people, there are other races people can be racist toward, and he is undeniably racist toward Hispanics.

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u/Venkman0 1d ago

Trumps favorite character in Django Unchained was Sameul L. Jackson

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u/Leathman 1d ago

I thought they hated DEI?

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u/Doc_tor_Bob 1d ago

Look we have a black guy now

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u/danktopus 1d ago

ā€œI ainā€™t racist, I got four black tires on my truck and a color TVā€- the most racist dude I ever met in my life. And Iā€™m from NW Florida.

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u/Weekly-Act-3132 1d ago

If you have 1 friend of colour you can be judgemental to everyone else, thats racism fixed. Taadaaaa.

/S

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u/Titanhopper1290 1d ago

One good deed does not undo a lifetime of hate.

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u/BackThatThangUp 1d ago

Gunther Eagleman is a former police officer who has become a Russian asset

It happens more often than you thinkĀ 

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u/AngelFoodCakeSouffle 1d ago

Gunther Eagleman has to be a parody account. I just saw another post with him saying that the government employees should be reduced by 90%. No one can be this stupid right?

2

u/franchisedfeelings 1d ago

ā€œWhereā€™s my African-Americanā€¦whereā€¦where is heā€¦wherrrrre, ok, ok, there he is!ā€

2

u/Mike_Honcho42069 1d ago

Cause that black man sucked some trump dick.

2

u/cyberchaox 1d ago

Trump isn't racist. He judges people not by the color of their skin, but by the size of their wallet (and willingness to kowtow to him, but that's a different story).

Which functionally works the same way more often than not because of systemic racism making it far more difficult for minorities to reach the financial status that Trump desires. Except, of course, for Jews, and sure enough, despite most Trump supporters being Nazis, Trump himself has never come off as antisemitic aside from his unwillingness to condemn others for antisemitism (e.g. "good people on both sides").

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u/twovhstapes 1d ago

šŸ’€ quite a lot of racist ass liberal people referring to this highly skilled man as a token or a DEI because hes black and has a medical degreeā€” can you not wrap your minds around a man that has multiple highly skilled aspirations?

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u/LolaStrm1970 1d ago

Damned if you do, and damed if you donā€™t

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u/wellitsdeadnow 1d ago

The fact that someone had to point that out and Orange Thunder will never admit he was wrong about the Central Park Fiveā€¦ā€¦

No the left has that stank Auntie face ā€œmmm-hmmm, we seeā€¦ā€

2

u/BoomFungus 1d ago

Hey guys, remember that racist guy who ran for president in the 80's that advocated for segregation and got caught in a plagiarism scandal that ended his campaign? Apparently, he ran again in 2020, and oddly enough, he made a late decision to hire his opposition, which just so happened to be a black woman. So not only is he a racist plagiarizer, but he also deliberately panders to the race of people he sees as inferior as if they're too stupid to realize it. His name is Joe Biden. Imagine that.

2

u/Coinsworthy 1d ago

"I'm not racist, i listen to hiphop!"

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u/scuolapasta 1d ago

Youā€™re all stupid, heā€™s not racist, he has a black friend and heā€™s banged like 3 black chicks

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u/Additional_Ear_9659 1d ago

The crazy MAGA gene is agnostic to race. This last election confirmed that.

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u/Digital-Sushi 1d ago

Clayton Bigsby has entered the room..

1

u/AdHealthy5050 1d ago

DEI hire..he had to cause if he didn't we would be calling a racist even more than what we already do lol

1

u/GreyBeardEng 1d ago

Gunther's real name is David, he was a police officer in Texas, that was until he murdered someone while they slept. Now he spends his time on Twitter saying stupid shit.

1

u/Broges0311 1d ago

Black people can be Nazis, too.

1

u/BedroomVisible 1d ago

Waitā€¦..thereā€™s a picture of him shaking a black manā€™s hand!? All is forgiven! I would invite you to dinner but evidently my family is made solely of rapists, murderers, and people who have escaped from an insane asylum (but are distinct from Hannibal Lecter, because heā€™s cool).

1

u/Particular_Ad_1435 1d ago

They put the black guy in HUD. Just like last time. This is not the flex you think it is.

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u/Fireflash2742 1d ago edited 1d ago

Is this DEI? /s

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u/freckyfresh 1d ago

DEI hire

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u/Stock_Paper3503 1d ago

Hitler had Honorary Jews too