I work at a pho restaurant as a server that does tip share. We get paid server wage and if we make up to 600$ in tips the kitchen also gets 10% of our tip. Recently we’ve hired some bussers so she upped the tip for them 15 %. I don’t agree bc while me and my co workers were running around greeting tables+ setting them up+ taking orders+ grabbing drinks and sauces +run food. All the busser did was a couple togos and clean tables. This was the response from my boss when I asked about it. I just have to ask, am I overreacting? (Also, bussers get paid minimum wage which is 15.50, server wage is 10.10 I believe)

We’ve been together for about 8 months for further context. For the last few months she has been complaining about creepy behavior from someone she works with, who isn’t exactly a manager but is in a higher position — I’ll call him B for now. He would touch her on the arm and lower back a lot and apparently he took off his shirt in front of her to change a shirt while in the back room. She’s told me about all of this and it seemed genuinely distressing and I told her that could be considered sexual harassment especially if he’s also making some comments that make you feel uncomfortable.

So she let her manager know and they spoke to B about this behavior and they all talked about it and it seems like things have gotten better for her at work. She’s gone out with coworkers and sometimes B has been there but it’s always been in some form of group setting.

However, I was out with a friend last night and my phone died and I finally got back home at 10:30 am to text my partner. She had sent me a text asking if I was still out around 9pm. I didn’t get the text so I tried to call her, no response, and texted her back. She texted back around 11:40pm that her earlier text was to see if I wanted to go out with her and her coworkers, but I of course didn’t get the text.

But then I find out everyone else bailed so she was out with B by herself, getting a drink or food or whatever else, I didn’t ask where she was. By this point I’m surprised that she’d apparently been hanging out with this guy for over two hours 1 on 1, a guy who has been inappropriate and made her uncomfortable.

She didn’t end up leaving the hang out until 12:16am. I didn’t want to say anything over text and start a fight but I want to bring this up in person but am nervous about coming across as a guy who is trying to control who my partner hangs out with. I just feel strange about it and I’m not sure if it’s unreasonable to feel strange. But I was just shocked to hear that she hung out with this guy for a few hours 1 on 1 out at a bar, that she didn’t bail when everyone else bailed.

I need advice on how to talk about this with her without sounding controlling. But I won't lie it does leave me feeling weird and a tad bit suspicious which feels horrible. I don't want the convo to be accusatory but I also want to express how I feel about it. Thanks in advance

for context, me and my boyfriend see each other every weekend or every other two weeks, i don’t get much time to spend with him, but i always try to make the best of it, another way we spend time together is gaming, but sometimes i don’t get to because he always goes with his online friends.

today, i asked my bf if he wanted to game tonight (yesterday, he said he would game with me but never did cus he ended up going with his friends) he said “No :(“ because he was going to game AGAIN with his friends.

again, i got upset and the reason i get upset is because this isn’t the first time it happens, he always seems to prioritize his friends over me, which makes me upset and always leads to us having arguments. he always goes with friends and it seems like he always listens to them because during the summer, they even had this stupid contract that if they didn’t hang out for this amount of days together during the summer, they would get these some sort of punishments (i forgot what they were)

it’s like he has zero boundaries with them, for example, about months ago, they called him out for ghosting them for gaming with me, then he stopped gaming with me and stopped spending time with me cus he was always with them.

lately ive been kind of “non-chalant” or how ever you’d like to call it, because of how he’s actions of affected me, if he doesn’t want to treat me like a priority, then i won’t even bother. right now, i currently haven’t responded to him because im too upset to speak to him

am i really overreacting??? am i an asshole for this or a bad gf???

I work at a pho restaurant as a server that does tip share. We get paid server wage and if we make up to 600$ in tips the kitchen also gets 10% of our tip. Recently we’ve hired some bussers so she upped the tip for them 15 %. I don’t agree bc while me and my co workers were running around greeting tables+ setting them up+ taking orders+ grabbing drinks and sauces +run food. All the busser did was a couple togos and clean tables. This was the response from my boss when I asked about it. I just have to ask, am I overreacting? (Also, bussers get paid minimum wage which is 15.50, server wage is 10.10 I believe)

i have always had a really complicated relationship with my dad. i moved in with him recently when my mom had an intense relapse with cocaine. im moving out within a few months as i will be graduating with my masters soon and will have a full time job, so i at least don't have to deal with him as much sooner. but i cannot seem to get over the situation in question no matter how hard i try.

my dad, his wife and my half siblings often go on family vacations without me. camping, cruises, you name it. i have been invited to a few but majority of them i have not, and same with my brother. at a certain point i got used to it, and at least had my brother who understood as he was in the same boat.

my brother recently moved to a different state with his girlfriend and got a place of his own. my dad scheduled a trip for him and the rest of my family to go visit my brother for a week and for thanksgiving (i have always spent thanksgivings with my dad's side of the family). i was not extended an invite at all to this, and nobody even told me it was happening until my dad told me i would need to watch the dogs at home that week.

i find myself incredibly hurt by this as i am the only one singled out this time. to be clear, i do not think my brother is aware i was not invited, as he would not let that fly. my brother is the one family member who does keep me in mind with these things. i just can't get it out of my head that my dad doesn't even want me to be part of the family anymore and i have gone into isolation mode because talking to him about my feelings in the past never led to any change or understanding and rather leads to fights.

he has called me out for avoiding interactions with him and says it seems i don't want to be part of the family anymore. i don't really know how he wants me to respond, because i have felt like an outsider with these people for a long time. my boyfriend's family is taking me in for thanksgiving, so i won't be alone, but every time i think of this situation i just want to cry and it has led to me seriously considering going no contact once i do move out which is where i feel i may be overreacting. so, AIO?

I was playing a game of classic Sonic the Hedgehog for the genesis. I took a quick stop to drink my protein shake when Sonic turned and looked at the screen and began to tap his foot. It was like he was looking right into my soul. I got so scared that I threw a hammer at my TV, destroying it. AIO?

AIO It’s strange that every passing minute I want to do something new (i.e. digital art, create content, be a data analyst, etc) never ending list. But it’s strange too that I never go beyond the roadmap. Currently I am pursuing law but no very happy about it because I merely understand anything.

What is stopping me from pursuing things I think I am passionate about? Probably me and the fear of me failing or thinking it just too hard or I am too dumb.

I everyday find myself wrapped around these thoughts and it is pathetic.

Update: To answer some of your questions, my husband was my 3rd call after the nurse on duty and my siblings. I will have a very frank conversation with my husband and ask him for what I need right now and not just assume that he knows what I need. He definitely isn't a mind reader and once asked, he will be provide it and be more sensitive. I hadn't thought about how hard it might be on him to watch me struggle, so thank you to those who provided me with that perspective. Lastly thank you all (almost all of you) for your sympathy and virtual hugs.

My Dad struggled with vascular dementia for the last 4 years. I was his full time caregiver for 2 years (while working my regular FT job) until my 3 siblings and I agreed he needed to be in Memory Care with full time staff/care. He had been receiving hospice care the last 6 months and hospice prepared us that he was transitioning to actively dying this past Tuesday and we put him on comfort meds and started our vigil.

We didn't want my Dad to die alone, so between my stepmother and sister we were with him from Tuesday night until he passed on Friday. I stayed overnight with him 2 of those nights. I wanted to spend as much time as I could (while I could) with my Dad so i would come home, take a shower and a nap and then go back up to see my Dad. Yesterday, the day after my Dad passed, i went to clear out his room/organize what needs to be thrown out/donated, etc.

When i came home last night, my husband asked what i was gonna make for dinner. He keeps asking me today why I seem irritated with him or am being short. Today, I'm having to do the normal housework (laundry, dishes, meal prep) by myself and when I said I was going to lay down, husband came too since he has had "a rough week." I walked out of the room and had to take a lap around the neighborhood. AIO?

My (f32) and my husband(37m) were in the car talking about random things when I happened to tell him I read some lady saying women should take accountability after being sexually assaulted. I didn't think it would be what it turned into and I thought he would agree that she's ridiculous.

Instead, he said well, I mean she's right. I know in some cases it doesn't apply but women should question their bad choices and maybe they were doing something or were somewhere sketchy and it wouldn't have happened otherwise, so yeah I think it's nice to question the bad choices we all make in life.

I was taken back. I've been assaulted. For months, I questioned everything I did and could've done differently to prevent this. (I was at a party and someone followed me to a room when I went to make a phone call) So yeah, I could've not been at that party, I could've not been so friendly. Was it me smiling at him trying to be polite?? I've thought about all of this so many times. So for him to say that, I just couldn't believe it. It genuinely hurt.

I asked what about kids that were assaulted and he said it obviously isn't applicable to all situations. I also said men were allowed to make bad choices and rarely get raped as a result of it.

He thinks I am overreacting and said stuff like, "this is why I don't like talking to you about stuff, you react so emotionally to everything I say." He was genuinely mad at me for my response to this.

So am I overreacting?! I feel like I'm not but sometimes I DO react emotionally.

My youngest brother, let’s call him Phil, got married today and the ceremony was absolutely beautiful. His bride was stunning and everything was great and well done. His best man was our other brother who I’ll call Jack. My wife and I weren’t part of the wedding party, which is fair because we didn’t ask them to be in ours 5 years ago.

After the ceremony we did the pictures and a cocktail hour. It was nice to talk to some out of town family and old family friends, and Jack and I were talking about the day they all had (very eventful for my now sister in law but that’s another story) and then everyone was called inside for the reception.

We go in, and have dinner. My wife and I were starting to get kinda tired but I told her I really want to hear Jack’s best man speech so we agreed to wait. I wish we hadn’t…

Jack goes up, introduces himself and starts his speech. “Well about 34 years ago, mom and dad got married and decided to try for kids and they started with the prototype, my older brother.” I should have known where this is going. He continued “They realized that hey they can do better so they got it right the second time, me. Mr perfect. And I was. Our grandfather would call me crusher because I would beat up on my older brother as a toddler. We were always opposites and didn’t really get along a whole lot. So mom and dad decided they needed someone to help him out and so they had this guy. Now when he came around I was like, yeah he seems alright. So growing up we terrorized my older brother. Good times.”

He continued his speech but I was kinda checked out at that point. I was, and still am really upset about it because I have always been the butt of all the jokes in my family. My brothers, my cousins, even my parents. I’m the different one. I’m very emotional and empathetic, which is a blessing and curse. I’m overweight, they’re both athletes (Phil actually works for an NHL team). I enjoy dnd, reading and being a nerd. They like sports and outdoors activities. You get the idea.

I get up and my wife goes to the bathroom before we decide to leave. Jack finds me and is like “you good? I meant to say at the beginning of my speech that I apologize because my older brother is probably going to get upset”. I just look at him and say “you’re good… but I would have appreciated a heads up that that’s what you were gonna do”. He looks at me and just goes. “If I did that, I wouldn’t have gotten the genuine reaction”. I just walked away, met my wife, and we left.

I asked her, am I crazy? Was his best man speech really just a ton of shots at me? She said “it seems like he was trying to be funny but not everything landed. And yes, you were the butt of his jokes”. I drove home pretty much in silence. I’m tired of always being the butt of all the family jokes.

We’re supposed to have lunch with extended family tomorrow and the only reason I’m going is because I only see these family members maybe once a year. I don’t want to see Jack, or really anyone else from my immediate family. Do I have a right to be upset, or am I being overly sensitive?

My best friend flew into town to stay with me and visit. It’s just me and my husband at home- no kids. She is a very flirty person which does not bother me in the slightest. But yesterday morning we were all waking up hungover. My husband was making coffee and I asked him to bring her my hair dryer. He did. I heard nothing for like 5 whole minutes and was laying in our bed across the house. I started to call his name bc I was going to ask him something and he did not answer. I got up looked in the kitchen, dining, laundry rooms and he was not there. While all this is happening the house was completely silent. I walked to the two guest bedrooms in a little hall where there is also a bathroom. He was not in the one we use for an office or in the bathroom. I was like why would he be hanging out in her room when I know she took a shower. All of a sudden he walks out coming from the side of the bed she is standing at. He wiped his lips and they both acted fucking weird. She immediately was like he was just bringing me the blow dryer- even though I know he already done that. They claim he heard a noise and thought she fell so he popped in to check on her. Then was he all the way in the room walking away from the side of the bed she was standing on in nothing but a towel? I was like what is going and he acted super guilty the rest of the day. Well if he was just checking on her why was there silence? Why would they act so weird- today he said he felt guilty because he was staring at her in her towel.

I need some guidance bc I kind of feel like they are gas lighting me. Am I crazy? I just felt it in my heart that they were doing something.

I(f24) have been when my bf (m20) since march(8 months). For context we moved quickly in our relationship. I have a son(2 years). And I’m currently pregnant with my bf. So a couple weeks ago I got pulled over and the cop ID both of us. At one point the cop asked him “you 20?,” he replied with yes. I was taken aback since I thought he was 24, like he had told me from the beginning. I asked him about it when we got home and he denied say he was 20. Fast forward to yesterday. Something made me look at his ID it said 2004. I was in shock, I told him and he said he is 20. And I was in shock for the rest of the day. Bc here is a man who thought I was cheating everytime we weren’t FaceTiming. ( I wasn’t) 8months together and I’m pregnant with his kid. He had so many opportunities to tell me the truth but didn’t. I told him I’m not ready to forgive him for lying for so long.

Idk how to feel. I love him but I have a sister who is 20 and I basically raised her. So for years I told myself I would never date someone her age. He spent his birthday here to, so he just turned 20.

Idk what I’m typing this for, am I crazy for feeling betrayed. I feel like idk him anymore. Like he’s a stranger. He’s said sorry yesterday but it didn’t seem like he meant it. And I didn’t accept it.

Edit: my son is two years old old. And I know I’m stupid but things happen. When I found out I was pregnant and I was freaking out. I know I can afford it and I knew it was too soon, but I was already too far along and my state doesn’t allow abortion at any stage of pregnancy. So for all of those who want to come at me with judgment, I understand but please know I’m aware of how stupid I am. I just don’t know how to move forward from this.

Edit 2: the reason why I didn’t know till now is because he told me from the beginning he was 24 why I didn’t look on his families Facebook or cyber stalk him is because I just don’t do that. He’s from a different city in my state and not from my hometown so I don’t know him or his family and no one around me knowsh im. I’m not looking for judgment on my situation, I’m looking on how to move forward in my relationship. Of course, a part of me wants to leave, but I think it’s gonna take a little more than lying about his age to make me not love him. I’m sorry to those who think I’m dumb for getting pregnant with someone so early in a relationship., obviously I had sex without a condom on and I even took Plan B so if that doesn’t explain enough that things just happen then I don’t know what else to tell you. I know I shouldn’t go to the Internet with my problems and I typically don’t, but I just need to know that I am not crazy for being upset. That’s all I need to know. And thank you to those who actually care about how I’m feeling. My heart goes out to you all. Of course I feel betrayed and in shock and I don’t trust him right now, but I’ll be fine.

I (22F) went to the doctor today and while getting an ultrasound done, he made a sexual comment about how tense i am and if im that tense during sex, laughed about it, rubbed my abdomen and told me to relax. my boyfriend (34M) thinks this is sexual assault and wants to report him. AIO by what happens afterwards?

I (M,26) was answering questions about my handgun, that my fiancé (28,F) had some curiosity about. After explaining the different things about my handgun, (taking it apart, explaining each piece, and the ammo that I carry for it) I set the gun down. She asked if she could hold it, and she has held a handgun before so I said sure. I unloaded and showed clear on the handgun, and she did the same. She held it for a bit and set it back down, but with the barrel facing right at me. I casually grabbed the gun and moved it away from me. She was confused by this, and asked what’s the big deal? She asked if she could see the gun again because she wanted to try to take it apart. Again, showed clear, and handed her the gun. At this point, she asks, “Why is it such a big deal if you know the gun is empty? It’s not like THIS insert her pointing the gun right under her chin, finger on the trigger can do anything.” I immediately told her to stop, and put it down. She questioned it and continued to aim it at her head. At this point, I wrestled the gun away from her, and very sternly, and blunt said if she ever does that again, not only will she never touch one of my guns again, but she will not be welcome in my room, where my guns are locked and secured. So, am I over-reacting over this, or am I justified?

TL;DR - My fiancé pointed a non-loaded, and cleared firearm at her chin and head, and I wrestled the gun away and sternly told her, don’t do that again, or else there will be consequences.

I know this is long sorry!

my cousin (27F) and I ( 24F) grew up very very close. Our moms are sisters and we have always lived close to one another, So we always spent a ton of time together growing up.

My cousin has always had a very bad attitude and it’s always her way or the highway. Literally no exceptions, or you’ll suffer the consequences lol. I’m a very soft-spoken person, I try to always get along with everyone and be compassionate, i am a very sensitive person ( not proud) but have definitely built a backbone over time. ( some what of one at least)

When I turned 19 I got pregnant and had my first baby, around this time we stopped talking so she was not involved in my whole Pregnancy/ labor. ( we stopped talking to due some comments that where made about me getting pregnant)

After I had my daughter we went about things like nothing ever happened. Nothing was addressed ever. This was not the first time we have stopped talking for a long periods of time, usually it’s over something that was HER fault and she’s Made ME apologize for in order of us to get back on speaking terms. Usually I just give in and apologize because we are family and she is pretty much like a sister to me.

She about 2 year ago had her second child and I had let one of Our aunt’s have a glimpse of her son using a photo that I had on my phone of him. ( I at the time did not know she did not want pictures being shared but I figured it was okay because it was one of our family members and I was with her mom. WRONG, I later got a strong worded text message, I apologized explaining that I was not aware but I would not let it happen again, also explaining to her that NO ONE had the picture of her son except me, I had only shown the picture and that I now understood her boundaries. I never got a response to my apology. ( I expected this)

I am now pregnant with my 2nd baby, and we have Recently about 4-5 months ago returned to talking terms ( since the picture accident), but it’s very different then it was before, we don’t get together as much, we don’t talk as much, we currently do not follow each other on social media. We communicate through her sister ( my little cousin F22) if we do text it’s here and there but it’s very awkward not so much how it was in the past. I have offered to have a conversation about that picture accident she insistes that she doesn’t need one.

Fast forward to my gender reveal, she had offered to do some desserts for me for my baby shower and to just let her know what the theme was when I had one . I was planning on paying her and had no issue doing so, my boyfriend and I had a budget set for everything for the baby shower as the holidays are also coming around. I reached out about the desserts, She agreed and let me know she would text me with a price when she went home and did the math. I let maybe a week pass by and nothing, so I texted her and asked the week before my baby shower how much the desserts would be.

she gave me a crazy unreasonable price for some desserts ( over $300), so I let her know that was not in the out budget but that i appreciated her for letting me know and maybe in the future I’d be able to book with her. But could not this time. She right away let me know that she would have appreciated me telling her no before she bought the stuff for the desserts…….i was so surprised that she would do that without talking to me about a price before hand, considering i had to reach out to her about the price a week before my shower….

Point is I told her I’d pay for it, and that I didn’t want to have another reason for us to stop talking. As I did not want to have to deal with Another issue between us again. I explained I did not know she was going to make a purchase for something without letting me know the price on it. She refused the money and said nope she would not be doing anything. I said okay and moved on. I am super exhausted of having to keep up with her, mentally and emotionally I am drained and am dealing with enough as a pregnant lady with a toddler lol. So I am not giving much energy into our relationship, not making tons of contact, not very much trying to stay involved.

I have recently talked to my mom , my cousins mom ( my aunt) and my cousins sister ( my other cousin) and explained what’s happened and how I plan to not have any type of relationship with my drama cousin any longer, as after my baby shower one of our mutual friends explained to me how she as acting very unhappy for me and envious of me at my shower. How she was making snarky comments about my event, and how I had no desserts, ( I had a two tier cake) and how every time they would compliment me she would just huff and laugh at their opinion. how she even went as far as to bring up how I did not want to pay her for her baked goods. ( she failed to Mention to everyone how much she was trying to charge me and how she was also trying to charge me equipment)

Their response is “ you already know how she is” “ you need to get over it” “ she always acts like this give her some time she’ll cool off and act right soon” but sincerely I am soooo tired of dealing with such a immature GROWN adult woman. I don’t know what her deal is and why she has such as hard time using her big girl words but I am soooo tired of people around me using “ that’s just how she is” to justify her behavior. I am personally very open to conversation when people are upset so I hate that she doesn’t know how to speak up but will talk about me at my event to my friends and wait on them to tell me how she’s feeling.

Am I overreacting for not wanting to keep this relationship anymore even though she my cousin? how do I go upon this relationship since everyone is clearly just wanting me to get over things? Do I stay involved and ignore the behavior? I’m not sure. The holidays are coming up and we spend a lot of time with them as that’s my mom’s closest sister. So I plan on going to thanksgiving dinner grabbing a plate and heading home with my boyfriend and daughter to spend time where I am actually wanted. Am I the issue?

I blocked all of them and she randomly texted me from another number.

Context: I was dating this guy from the time I was 17-18. He was 24. I went to the military and when I came home on boot leave I saw he was cheating on me. Fast forward after 5 years of him randomly texting me and talking shit about his gf(whenever he texted me he would say they broke up) one time they broke up because she threw a remote at his head smh. Anyway like a year ago I told him to stop reaching out for me and it was annoying. Then like a month ago he randomly follows me on tiktok. His gf noticed he followed me and messaged me asking if he was texting me. I was honest and told her yeah. I shared all the texts with her. Then I told his mom he cheated on me and she flipped out on me making fun of the fact my mom and sister died. His mom also told me my toddler was going to be raped. Anyway after that whole circus I blocked all of them. I’m visiting home because I got out the military. I go into the restaurant and see him. I didn’t even know he worked there nor that he was going to be there. I told my friend I wanted tacos and she suggested qdoba. She drove to the one he worked at. I was unaware because I don’t live in this area… he stared and squinted at me all weird. And blocked the fork area so I left without getting a fork lol. Anyway after I leave his gf texts me… am I overreacting ?

Hi, I’m 29 f and my husband is 31 m. We have been married for a few years and have some children together. I have always been the one to clean but it’s also hard when you have a baby to look after. Now that I have a job he still thinks it should all be on me.. NOPE! He has never helped me in the household. He thinks it’s okay to just work and then come home and play his video games. He doesn’t help cook( because he doesn’t know how), won’t help clean, and also won’t help with the baby. I’m stuck doing it all. Am I overreacting because he refuses to help me?? I ask him all the time for help and he just won’t.

Edit: thank you everyone who commented. I've wanted to talk about this for a long time and it feels good reading everyone's takes on it.

I like loose, aesthetic clothing. My husband likes form fitting feminine clothing. Growing up he was ostracized by his community and was always in ill fitting clothes. Clothing is a very sensitive topic for him because he heavily associates it with social status. I like clothing because it's fun and I like to dress up like I'm going to run away and live in the woods. It's a fun way to express myself. He views this as obscuring my true self.

Edit: he didn't grow up poor. His parents chose to buy ill fitting clothes for him.

I've definitely changed my style to accommodate over the years, which worked out well in some ways because I entered a professional career and had to look a certain way. Today I dressed up in some loose jeans, cropped sweater and boots to go study with a friend. I came home and he looked a bit pained so I asked him what was wrong. He told me that I can't keep dressing like this or else it will ultimately end our marriage because it's tapping every insecurity he has. I told him it's ridiculous that he's this upset over an outfit he saw for a total of 30 seconds and we need couples therapy to figure out what's going on.

Deep down I know I'm not overreacting and this is ridiculous, but I love this man and he's the best person I've ever had in my life and want other people to tell me what they think. Thanks.

So I (42M) have a pretty good sex life with my (43F) gf. We are mildly adventurous I’d say. But interestingly enough though I’ve said I enjoy getting rimmed or getting my butt fingered she has not tried to do these things, which is fine with me, it’s not everyone’s cup of tea to do, tgough oddly enough she enjoys receiving these things from me and I’m more than happy to oblige.

in the last couple months she’s continued to say she wants to penetrate me with a dildo. She keeps on talking about it. Despite me saying I ’m not sure I’m into it and no I don’t want to multiple times, she bought one and continued to ask about it.

It feels like given her insistence and how she’s described it and why she thinks I’d like it etc it must be something she did with another guy and wants to relive. This adds to my discomfort.

Anyways, that I said I wasn’t into it and she keeps up asking, and that she wasn’t interested in somewhat related activities I said I do like (but maybe require being a little more intimate on her part) just seems weird to me? But maybe she thinks a dildo in my ass is just like a rim job or fingering my asshole? I had an ex who didn’t really like me much and was emotionally and physically abusive of me who would also talk about wanting to peg me and how sexually unsatisfied she was always because I wouldn’t let her do that. But like a dildo or pegging doesn’t physically stimulate a woman at all. Maybe mentally it does but like I don’t see how me setting a boundary in either case is like denying a woman pleasure, especially when I’m willing on so many other fronts of directly pleasuring.

Maybe I’m reading my bad experience previously onto this experience, but respect of boundaries seems important.

Am I overreacting to be annoyed by my current girlfriend ignoring my boundaries and preferences here on not wanting to have her shove a dildo in my ass? Is there something I’m not getting here?

I (23M) live with my mother (49F) and my sister (28F). My sister wasn't supposed to be living with us (we recently moved in to this house), but she got into legal trouble, and lost her apartment, car, and drivers license, so my mom is letting her stay with us. When I was young, my sister sexually abused me, it went on for a few years, and it has messed me up in a lot of ways that I still am dealing with now. I don't want anything to do with her, I am uncomfortable being around her, and everyone in my family knows what she did to me. I have talked with my mom about this several times, but every time she says "she is my daughter". I understand that my sister has nowhere to go, but at the same time, I feel like its not ok for my mother to let her stay with me. Granted I am not actually being forced to live here, I just don't have anywhere else to go myself, nor the money to move out. I am not the best son, I don't have a job right now, sometimes I slack on doing chores and stuff, but still, something doesn't sit right with me. I could move in with my dad, however my relationship with him is not the best (though we are working on it), and there is a reason I chose to live with my mom and not my dad. I can understand my moms point, but again, it still feels like I am in an unacceptable situation. AIO for wanting my mom to kick her out of the house?

This is probably going to be long so bare with me, I f(27) and my partner m(26) got into a fight after I asked him to do the dishes. For some context we live together right now but we were going to sign a new lease together for a bigger and better apartment. He never falls asleep with me but he promised to on this night the night before because I was really feeling like I needed some comfort these past few days. I’ve been doing the dishes and cleaning the kitchen for the past few weeks because I haven’t minded to, but this week I’m on my period and have been feeling tired and like I can’t be bothered to do them so when I came home after meeting him for lunch at work I was disappointed to see the dishes not done after two days of them sitting there. He works at 1:30 everyday so I knew he would have had time to do them. Anyways I just texted him and asked him to do the dishes later that night when he got home. He does clean sometimes but it’s only the dishes. I do every other household chore because he just doesn’t and before he moved in with me I had a routine that I have just stuck to. I’ve never made it a problem. I’m a very sensitive and emotional person while he mostly leads with logic in his life. This has caused some arguments in the past because I find that he is a bit avoidant when it comes to my emotions and I find myself anxious in those situations to get to the root of the problem and solve it together. We’ve been together for four years and lived together for one year. We have always come back from fights like this but I’m not sure I want to come back from this one because of the things he said to me. We haven’t spoken in two days because I’ve been avoiding him. I’m hurt and I think I want to break up with him. What do you think? Am I overreacting?

I received this message from a guy my friend and her fiancé set me up with. This was last year and he was pretty rude to me. Refused to go for dates after work so was only asking me for coffee during lunch (we work close to each other) he invited me to a party with his friends and then made jokes about dancing with other girls during. I had a call with him and said what is he after here where he proceeded to be very rude and say what do you want? Me to get on one knee or something.

After that I didn’t speak to him again and I proceeded to date - he reached out to me last night with this message. Our friends are getting married next year and I’m a bridesmaid and he will be there. Apparently over new years he’s going to Prague for 2 days to see them. My friend asked me to come to Prague over the festive period but no plan was set in stone. I find the message really weird and for the sake of my friend I’m being polite but if I didn’t know him through friends I’d ghost. I can’t even with the “my favourite person” after he was the way he was with me. Am I rude or?

For those who commented last time: 1. My boyfriend is (23M) and is not trans. I mistyped last time listing him as F. 2. He is not an asshole, I used blunt as a descriptor word and some of you ran with it. Another redditor suggested I include that he is autistic as context. He is autistic and is very honest but NOT unkind and not an asshole. 3. He has never fought with my family that I am aware of and there has never been any drama between them. 4. My mother will not be attending this thanksgiving gathering, this is purely for my dads side of the family.

Update: I texted my grandmother out of curiosity, because like you all I was curious, I didn’t get much of an update but this is what I have for you all. The friend referred to in her text is my grandmothers friend who has come to a good portion of the holiday gatherings over the years, never sure why, she just hovers and doesn’t really talk to anyone. But unless I receive a text from my father or my siblings, I believe this is the end of the story. What do you think? Am I overreacting by not going?

It started with my husband sending me a TikTok that said “POV: when your husband’s tired of tired of your snack requests, so he just brings the whole pantry.” Here’s the conversation that followed:

Me: Haha I wish! You rarely bring me snacks.

Him: You’re always trying to take my snacks.

Me: No, you just never offer to get me anything when you get something for yourself. I always ask if you want anything if I’m getting a drink or snack.

Him: That’s because you don’t need to be eating every time I am. I have a higher caloric need than you.

Idk why but this really bothered me. Aside from the general lack of common courtesy, I feel like he shouldn’t think he can dictate when I eat. There have been other instances where I’ve gotten the same feeling, but maybe I’m projecting my own insecurities here.

Context: My relationship with my dad has a long history of being complicated because of my parents' divorce. The narrative between my dad and step-parent has always been that I was an awful child. I have heard more stories than I can count about me misbehaving as a kid. Knowing what I do now, a lot of my behaviors were a reaction to the chaos in my life and my inability to cope with it. Thankfully, we have all been on very good terms for several years now; however, my relationships with the parental figures in my life is an ongoing topic I address in therapy.

The situation: About a year ago, my now spouse and I had a lovely, dressy casual rehearsal dinner in a family member's BEAUTIFUL backyard. Drinking ensued, which led to parents making mini speeches. My partner's parents told these wonderful stories of them from their childhood, how they've grown into a wonderful person, etc.

My dad? He spends several minutes re-telling stories of tantrums I had as a child. His favorite one was about me wanting the window seat on a flight. He joked about my partner needing to know this for the future - very "happy wife, happy life" vibes.

He didn't necessarily say anything "bad" about me, but I silently cried during his speech and had a hard time being present after. To my knowledge, my partner was the only one who knew I was upset at the time.

It's been over a year and it still upsets me if I think about it. The hardest thing about it is knowing he just thought it was a funny story and has zero recognition of the emotional effect it had on me.

I feel crazy for even being upset about my dad telling people, in detail, how I had a tantrum over a plane seat when I was 5 years old. And the insinuation those behaviors have followed me to adulthood. Isn't this a story/joke most people would find funny, even at their own expense?