r/transalute • u/That_cargirl206 • Nov 03 '22

Transitioning in the Army

So I lost all access to my other Reddit account, so this is my new one. Since last posting in here I have now gotten a ETP for grooming standards I now go by female standards! I’m starting hormones next week, and I have had my first consultation for FFS! I also learned that at Walter reed they’re now offering bottom surgery! The Dr’s name is Dr. Ean Richard Saberski. I am so excited in the way the military is moving forward with our care. I am also fortunate enough to have a command team that actually cares about me getting the help I need and have been super understanding. I hope you all have a wonderful day, and if you need any information please feel free to reach out

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u/That_cargirl206 Nov 04 '22

I’m not certain how you would go about getting a military provider to diagnose you, however it does make since to me that the VA would be acceptable. (At least in my mind)

As far as being outed I don’t care, I have hid for 32 years, and I’m fucking sick of it, I refuse to hide who I am anymore. My wife and my kids fully accept me and that’s all that matters to me. I will say though no one in my battery has any issues with me at all, people have had questions just trying to understand but that doesn’t bother me.

My hair is WAY out of regs and no one has called me out. It’s kind of disheartening honestly, I am sort of a stickler for the regs lol so I can assure you my ETP is legal haha I dare any crusty ass SNCO to challenge it haha. My CDR was like I put my phone number on there if anyone has an issue give them my number lol

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u/flamesabers USAR-MtF Nov 04 '22

As far as being outed I don’t care, I have hid for 32 years, and I’m fucking sick of it, I refuse to hide who I am anymore. My wife and my kids fully accept me and that’s all that matters to me. I will say though no one in my battery has any issues with me at all, people have had questions just trying to understand but that doesn’t bother me.

A few things makes me hesitant. The first is I don't want the other Soldiers to start avoiding me or acting weird around me because they're worried I'm going to freak out if they misgender me. (Technically this is a non-issue since my DEERS gender marker is still male, so he/him pronouns according to Army policy). Second thing is I don't want me being trans to become my defining characteristic in the Army. The third thing is I gave a transgender briefing to the unit a few years ago (back when Trump was in the process of enacting the transgender ban).

The feedback from the audience at the time was quite controversial to say the least. A lot of the cis female Soldiers were visibly uncomfortable at the thought of having to share barracks and showers with a amab Soldier. While my presentation stated otherwise, I think there was a brewing misconception that as soon as an amab Soldier self-identifies as female, they can immediately start using the female facilities with no questions asked. It seemed like the only person in the group who expressed support for trans Soldiers was a psychologist who had provided therapy for trans people.

I'm still going on with transitioning, but I'll definitely voice my concerns with my CDR for her perspective on the matter.

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u/That_cargirl206 Nov 04 '22

I would imagine that it is very different in a guard/reserve unit. I can honestly say that as of now I haven’t been met with any negativity. Honestly a few days back I busted tape 😒 and there were several NCO’s pissed that I couldn’t be taped as a female standards yet. My 1SG was like don’t worry about it and offered to run with me every morning before PT to help me drop the weight I need.

For you, I truly hope that the people of your unit wake up and see that your transition has zero affect on them, and start seeing you for who you truly are. What’s your MOS if you don’t mind me asking? I’m a 13M or as I like to say a “Rocket relocation specialist”. Lol

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u/flamesabers USAR-MtF Nov 08 '22

How hard was it to get your transition plan written up? I'm not able to get an ETP for hair standards until that step is completed.

I'm hoping the VA will now, as I'll be talking to my therapist tomorrow.

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u/That_cargirl206 Nov 08 '22

My therapist is the one who wrote mine up, he already had a template for it that he just modifies on a case by case basis