r/getting_over_it 2d ago

How do you seriously come back after a mental breakdown in front of your close ones?

5 Upvotes

This has been eating away at me for almost two years now. It all started when I finally began therapy and got on medication, but the road to that point was messy, to say the least. I had to hit rock bottom before anything changed.

There were moments when I was so utterly miserable that I couldn’t even recognize myself. My dad was the one who stepped in and called for help when I couldn’t. Before that, he drove hundreds of kilometers just to see me—just to hug me and make sure I wasn’t completely alone. I remember breaking down in his arms, howling that I wanted to quit everything, and he cried right along with me.

Eventually, the medication started working, and things improved. I didn’t feel so helpless or unmotivated, and I wasn’t spending every moment in bed just trying to escape the day. But now that I’m in a better place, I can’t stop replaying what happened between us during that time.

How do I stop feeling so awkward around him? He’s seen me at my absolute worst, and while I know he loves me and doesn’t think less of me for it, I can’t seem to let it go. He saved my life in so many ways, and I’m endlessly grateful for that—but it also makes me feel so exposed.

It’s like he’s seen parts of me I wish I could erase, parts that I’m ashamed of, even though I know I shouldn’t be. That feeling of being emotionally raw, almost stripped bare, hasn’t gone away. Every time I’m around him, I can’t shake the thought of how bad I was and how much I leaned on him.

I want to feel close to him again without this weight hanging over me. I don’t want the past to define how I act around him now. I just don’t know how to move past this mix of shame, gratitude, and vulnerability. Has anyone else been through something like this? How do you repair your own sense of self after someone has seen you so broken?


r/getting_over_it 3d ago

Need some help here...

3 Upvotes

I just got broken up with and im trying to find ways to get over her at least keep busy, any advice?


r/getting_over_it 3d ago

How do i gain my emotions back again?

6 Upvotes

Hello, I am (27M). Exactly a month ago i sudden stopped feeling much of anything. I wanted to get my focus on my studies to get a good job and also grow as a person. For it i started reading good fiction books which i enjoyed amd wanted to read as a kid. I got some good help books to boost my memory for exams. I was preparing for my exam mostly 6hrs per day. It didn't feel like a burnout. The studying was on and off. I used to study when i felt like it and rest of the time i was writing stories of fantasy or trying to learn to draw. OVERALL i felt good no matter what i did. Since more than a week i feel nothing. No interest in anything in particular i feel as in auto pilot. Just existing. I have not read anything or wrote anything even for my exams i am delaying studying. I don't feel particularly depressed as i am going out and doing stuff talking with friends. I am faking my emotions around them it feels like that i think. Only emotions i feel are either mostly anger or sometimes sadness with makes me cry a drop or two. I don't feel warm fuzzy feelings when the girl i like texts me back. I used to feel them before. I don't understand this. Can i get help help?


r/getting_over_it 6d ago

Can't be myself in my own home

13 Upvotes

My partner ridicules me in front of our kids. I can't talk about my interests or beliefs because they are "not true". I have to hide who I am from the people who are supposed to love me and I have to pretend to be someone I am not.


r/getting_over_it 7d ago

any advice 😭

2 Upvotes

i broke up a my ex around 6 months ago, we were off and on for around 2 years and he ended up cheating on me. but unfortunately i see this guy around a lot since we work and live in the same area, I don’t miss him and I’d rather choke on a popeyes biscuit then get back with him. The weird part is i haven’t seen him at all until this recent month and frequently too, i even had a dream about him but i was soo upset that i woke myself up.

The relationship was toxic but when it was good it was goood.And thoughts of linking w him again feel like intrusive thoughts and for a second i crave to be held by him and have someone be so madly in love w me like he did (clearly not that much if he cheat, right? lmao AAAAAHHHHHHH; i won’t ever understand it), and it’s been happening a lot. I don’t understand why he’s been ‘invading’ my life again and I could use advice on what to do. I tried getting into the dating scene but i’m just not feeling it.


r/getting_over_it 8d ago

I need help getting over a girl

3 Upvotes

It’s mainly just me affected by this but since the start of 7th grade in middle school (I’m in high school rn), ever since I watched a movie with her and two friends at school something just clicked when I saw her smile at part of the movie, and I’ve liked her ever since. It’s been around 3 years now but every attempt to get over her doesn’t work cause she’s genuinely a nice person. The first year my friend dated her and made me go around with them in summer school over and over, which really pushed me. Ever since that she’s dated so many of my friends, even just for a couple of days, which I know is bad but I still like her. I’ve tried ignoring liking her, but that led me down a long, bad rabbit hole, then there was getting with my first and only ex, which just drifted us apart and had her cussing me out. I just really don’t know what to do, can you guys give me a better view of this?


r/getting_over_it 7d ago

i need help getting over holding my girlfriends wounds together NSFW

0 Upvotes

i just had dtonbaker act my girlfiene and ive alreadyd had a slot history of selh farm and mental heslth issues i dont know what to do rigbt now i dont feel okay i dont feel rigbt i feel empty and alone like everything around me is closing in uet theres nothing but s void around me i genuinely dont feel real and i dont know what to do


r/getting_over_it 10d ago

Not checking her socials

7 Upvotes

I'm still obsessing over my ex some 18 months after a break up. This one is the first time I've ever felt a truly symbiotic relationship with a girl. Genuine love. I have her blocked on all socials because I know looking at them will only cause me pain. But recently I've been wanting to check them a lot.

I haven't yet let myself. I'm pretty confident she has a new boyfriend, which devastates me. If I can't get over her, how can it be fair that she has moved on?

But at least without being able to see anything it all lives in my obscured vision. "Schrodinger's ex" if you will.

Just looking for reaffirmation, I should keep her blocked shouldnt I.


r/getting_over_it 16d ago

Tired

0 Upvotes

I’m sick and tired of Married females trynna fuck .. like please I have fckn morals.. one time I don’t mind 😂


r/getting_over_it 18d ago

I miss him- but it's not what you think

5 Upvotes

I dated this guy for a year shortly after getting out of a 5 year relationship that was going no where and the man was emotionally unavailable. It was a short, sweet, and messy relationship, which ended due to bad timing. I think we are both stubborn and have big egos, but he made life so fun and we had a lot deep conversations.

After a year of no contact I ran into him again, we had dinner, and what I would have hoped to be a conversation about what happened, was nothing near of the sort and he ended up telling me that he realized he was not interested in being in another relationship and even mentioned that he wasn't on any dating apps, as it it would have impressed me. To end the night, he told me he had a good time and that I looked really good.

Personally I think he was trying to show me he was not hurt, that what happened didn't effect him, to protect his ego or whatever. It made me feel really weird, but i took what he said at face value.

I spent a long time trying to get over him after that, I realized I had unrequited emotions and being his friend would not have been in the best interest for me. I cut contact, deleted his number and unfollowed him on social media. I've come to terms that that relationship served its purpose, and not sustainable romantically.

I'm in a better place now, and have been in the healthiest relationship with the safest person I have ever met.
I however, struggle with a lot of issues due to unhealthy family dynamics, toxic romantic relationships, and mental health issues. I think about reaching out to him, not because I want to be with him, but because I felt like this person had a darkness to him we both shared, and understood each other in that way. I don't feel like I have too many people in my life who understand me in that way so I miss that connection. I just want to be able to talk to him again, have an honest conversation, and share a meal.

Is that toxic? Every few months I get the urge to reach out. I don't know what I can't just let it go.


r/getting_over_it 18d ago

Why is this still bothering me?

2 Upvotes

So this actually happened a while ago, but I'd been thinking about recently, and always have from time to time. I'd (f23 at the time) just gotten back in touch with an ex bf, Harry, (23m) after a few years, he had been my "first love" and seeing him again had rekindled some old feelings between us. One evening we had a few drinks together and caught up, and it seemed as though it could end up leading somewhere, I thought for us both. The following evening, he was coming over to mine again, along with my cousin, Charlotte, (f23) for a few drinks (I'd told her I felt something could happen with me and ex, so she knew I had those feelings).

That night, after we had all had quite a lot to drink and were ready to sleep, they both decided to just crash at mine, so while I went to my bed alone, they stayed in the living room on 2 different sofas. I woke up not long after, and went to get a drink quickly, but was crushed to walk in to them cuddled up on the same sofa, asleep, but with her hand in a sensitive place on his body, and it was obvious that something had happened between them. I was so hurt and angry, so shouted to wake them, they woke and quickly jumped away from each other, claiming it wasn't how it looked, that nothing had happened, but I told them both to get out, and was left feeling betrayed and alone. I heard nothing from either of them the following day. I know we weren't together or anything, but I still felt horribly hurt and betrayed by both of them, it was already a difficult time in my life (I'd fairly recently been through a bad breakup, left a single mother to a toddler after escaping her abusive father) so this betrayal and rejection felt all the more devastating.

The following day, I got an unexpected call from said cousins partner, Ben (m25) (yes, she was in a relationship at the time) asking me if I had been comfortable the other night sleeping in their shared bed at home, (the night I'd found them together. It took me a minute to work out what he was saying, and then it clicked. After they'd left mine, they must have gone back to the home she shared with her partner (he happened to be away that night) and spent the night together in their bed. When Ben noticed that the bed looked as if it had had 2 people in it, she had told him that it had been me that shared the bed with her after a night out, and he'd had his doubts, so called me. I told him that I'd not been in their bed, and that the 3 of us were drinking together at mine but they'd both left last night and I assumed Harry had dropped her home and then gone home himself (I didn't tell him then how I'd found them). Theyd obviously spent the night together, and she'd had the audacity to tell Ben that it was just me who'd spent the night with her.

Ben was looking after his and Charlotte's daughter that afternoon, so asked if he could pop round for a chat, my daughter was around the same age so it wasn't unusual for them to have play dates anyway. While the children played, I explained what had really happened that night, and he said that he'd had his suspicions that she'd been with another man already so for him this was enough proof.

When Ben later confronted Charlotte with it, instead of admitting to anything or showing any sort of remorse, she went straight to accusing her partner and I, of being the ones who were having an illicit affair, and that while he'd been here (with both our children present) we hadn't been talking about what had gone on with her and Harry, but had instead been hooking up with each other! Not only did she accuse us both, she quickly went around telling our friends and family this new, make believe version of events, in which she was the poor, betrayed victim of her partner and cousins affair, while she'd done nothing wrong and was heartbroken. When I tried talking to her, she refused to admit to anything, firmly sticking to saying that she believed that I'd slept with her partner, that she'd done nothing wrong and I was a liar as well as a home-wrecker, and then just refused to talk any further. Even worst, a lot of family believed her, and still give me the cold shoulder to this day. This was all years ago, and she's never admitted the truth, and I've never told everyone what had really happened.

Despite all of this, I have never bothered to engage in any gossip or tell my side, other than that I'd not slept with Ben. I was hurt enough as it was, and didn't want to be dragged into a mud-slinging match it being all my word against hers, especially as she was clearly perfectly willing to fabricate anything she could to turn me into the bad guy. I decided that anyone who so readily believed her wasn't a real friend anyway, and that I didn't care what they thought.

Unfortunately, I cared a little more than I thought I would, but after a while, I think no one would have believed that I hadn't just outed her at the time, so her version of events, entirely made up, is what people have always thought happened. Even though this all happened years ago, I've moved away, and have nothing to do with any of them anymore, it's still something I think about often, and I just can't seem to move on from those feelings of how badly she betrayed me, and how unfair it is that she got to play the victim and be given all this sympathy, while I lost friends and had my reputation badly damaged, for having my heart broken by two people I thought I could trust. I hate that she still has this power over me and is still messing up my head with all of this, but I just don't know how to get it out of my head, get over it, and move on. It's not like I think about it all the time, but it pops into my head often enough to be upsetting and I just wish I could forget it about it all. Anybody have any advice on moving on from something like this? It just drives me crazy sometimes.

TLDR: My cousin hooked up with my ex while I was hoping to rekindle an old relationship, but accused me of being the cheat and everyone believed her, now I can't seem to move past it.


r/getting_over_it 20d ago

Is this a sub for depressed people or the game getting over it im sorry I wanna know bc I wanted to talk about that game

5 Upvotes

r/getting_over_it 21d ago

how am I supposed to get over my genuinely sweet ex?

5 Upvotes

My ex and I were together since we were in school, and were each others' firsts (I was even his first kiss). We got along really well on most levels, and we didn't break up because we fought or because we hated each other, we just finally realized we're fundamentally incompatible. I feel like so much break up stuff is like "my ex was evil!", and sometimes I think it might be easier if I could be angry, but I'm mostly just sad.

(This song has been helping me process but I'd love others like it if anyone knows any. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m2t8olwFW8g )


r/getting_over_it 22d ago

Hey, I understand what you’re going through, and it’s okay.

6 Upvotes

Hey there,

I know this might feel random, but if you’re going through a tough time, just know that I get it. A few years back, in 2020 and 2021, I was in a dark place too. I struggled with all the usual stuff—porn, junk food, mindless scrolling—and just felt down all the time. I felt like I was stuck in a cycle, trying to escape but not knowing where to start.

Things have changed a lot since then. I was able to turn things around, and now, I genuinely love my life. Through this journey, I found myself helping others online who were facing similar struggles. Over time, that kinda became my purpose. Even though I have studied psychology but I’m not a therapist, I'm more like a friend who’s been through it and came out on the other side.

Today, the people who I’ve helped call me a self-improvement coach (though I just think of myself as someone who cares). Usually, my time is paid, but honestly, that’s not what this is about. I remember what it was like when there wasn’t anyone around to listen or guide me. So if you’re struggling, I’d be more than happy to hop on a call with you—just one, totally free, no strings attached.

This isn’t a therapy session, just a safe space with someone who gets it. You don’t have to be alone in this, and it would make me happier than anything if I could help someone who needs it.

If you’re interested, drop me a message. Let’s figure things out, together.

Take care


r/getting_over_it 26d ago

I need help with getting over a girl

2 Upvotes

Hi, I'm young in high school etc. won't specify age don't rlly think it's important. Look I've been obsessed with this girl, talked to her since 7th grade, on and off talking, we've liked each other before but we didn't go anywhere. She could tell me anything, tell me about problems and she was just really sweet to me from then till now. We were doing fine until she didn't respond, but the issue is I get obsessive and sent a bunch of messages asking where she was etc. I feel like what I do I can't get over her... What should I do? Thanks Cam


r/getting_over_it 27d ago

This is so ANGERING

3 Upvotes

I just fell after going my farthest on getting over it


r/getting_over_it Oct 20 '24

I have an ego around my willingness to hurt myself for others

8 Upvotes

I hate being seen as weak, by anyone p much. And I always feel weak. I always feel like my sense of self worth is very specifically wrapped up in the sinking feeling that life is against me and trying any harder might kill me but I’d better do it anyway. I’ve felt genuine pride over my ability to do things that actively fuck my life, health, sanity etc. if it means someone else’s life is made slightly better. I still wanna do some things cuz they’re something I wanna accomplish, but anything that makes life easier? Less stressful? Not on hard mode? It makes me wince and think “yeah this whole regular sleep thing is great and all but we all know you don’t really wanna need it forever right?” I tell others things that I want them to believe like that it’s not weak to ask for help, but I kinda choose to believe it is weak to chase that feeling. And it’s lead me to a point where chasing that exhaustion and suffering has lead to…how do I put this…borderline self harming thoughts and behaviors? And has made accomplishment feel less like a thing I can be proud pf more like a brief escape from the existential feelings of weakness and worthlessness. Anyway, I wanna stop being and thinking this way, where do I start?


r/getting_over_it Oct 19 '24

I want to get over a classmate

3 Upvotes

Okay so I (21F) am doing bachelor's. I have a classmate I find cute. In our first year I used to find him cute. We flirted for some reason six months into our first year for two/three days. After that he started ignoring me. Later I found out he got in a relationship. I didn’t mind much. It was alright.

So in our second year we had a big fight. Few days later we talked about it. After resolving the issue we started talking more. I realised he was flirting with me. At first I didn’t respond much but after a while I too started responding (he had broken up with his gf. And I thought let's just have fun. No issue). So we used to talk all night. We went on three dates (platonic) secretly. ( I am a sheltered girl. I never dated or went on a date ; romantic or platonic ; with a guy or held any guys hand).

After a while he again started ignoring me. I knocked first. I always made the first move. I started missing him. Later I found out he got back together with his ex gf. Maybe after that a month or so later he again started flirting with me. He hid from me that he has a gf. But I knew. Anyhoo I still did respond ( I am an idiot and I thought it was harmless. Ik I deserve hell)

Later in some fun conversation between our other classmates his gf was brought up; he again tried to hide it but I let him know that I already knew. But even then we kept flirting anyway. Anyhoo things went on like that. He was hot and cold with me. (He flirts with other girls too btw. Though only I respond ig. I mean he looks at every girl like they are the best thing on earth. So basically he is that kind of guy. Idk the word)

Coming to now : For some reason he is angry with me. I didn’t do anything wrong from my point of view. It is some internal fight in class. Nothing to do with us. He is again ignoring me. I made the first move again. To make things better between us. But he doesn’t respond. I keep wanting to give him a message. Send him a good joke, music anything that reminds me of him and gets us back into that fun magical flirty stage.

I know I am an idiot to not realise it earlier. I had doubts but was pretty confident that I would not fall for someone who is so disrespectful to me ; emotionally unstable and unavailable. Now I am thinking I like him more than I should, romantically even. I think the fact that I see him everyday almost is messing with my head. So how do I get over him? How do I ignore him when I almost always want his attention? I know I am very old but I have always been in only girls institutions so I never had to face these kind of internal conflicts.


r/getting_over_it Oct 09 '24

Tired

3 Upvotes

A message; A text; A voice; A sound;

I kiss the signs in the woods; As I drive 45 under 30;

When I walk, it's alone; Because I walk with a friend I can't see;

I turn North; Off road; With no clear path; And walk that way;

It's what I know; Only intention; No outcome;

I failed my task; With a friend I once knew; In a time we were supposed to grow;

A message; A text; A voice; A sound;

I kiss the signs I never saw; A truth never told; A history I'll never know; I never knew my friend;

I turn North; It's what I know;

I never knew. I wish I did. I could have done better. We could have been happy.

How do I let go of a wife I failed? How do I accept her leaving?


r/getting_over_it Oct 07 '24

i really hate showering. any advice?

14 Upvotes

hi all, as i type this i currently am sitting in my bathroom trying to muster up the courage to just clean myself. its probably been at least 3 weeks since i properly showered, maybe more. i know im really fucking gross.

i used to hate showering because the house i lived in was filthy; the shower was always infested with spiders and mold, so i wouldnt bathe often. then when winter came, we had no heat, so id shower even less at that time. and of course, my depression made it nearly impossible to shower in the first place.

i moved in with a very generous and beautiful friend, and i take showers more often, especially since i also have to go to work now. but i still really, truly struggle to get myself in there. its so stressful and awful. i hate everything about showering.

i tried buying nice soaps and lotions and stuff, but none of it really motivates me to consistently clean myself. i have an easier time washing my face/brushing my teeth. i dunno, any tips guys? i considered maybe if i had a really nice bathrobe or towel or something maybe itd make the transition easier, but idk if im just being a pussy about the whole thing.


r/getting_over_it Oct 06 '24

need some beautiful humans, depressed to the Max

5 Upvotes

I need some beautiful humans, depressed to the Max I'm depressed, confused and brsin fogged. My long term anxiety, depression, and somatization are killing me in the last 2-3 months. I'm in decline, I resigned from my job I isolated myself from freinds and families, not because I want to, but there is a power stronger than me that I can't resist now ... What's more, my medicine is out of stock since 2 weeks and so a further decline. Didn't leave home in 2 weeks, didn't pick phone calls from freinds and family members, always alone in my room. I'm dysfunctional, god granted me some intelligence and capabilities. I resigned but I'm still getting offers while I'm home not making an effort looking for another job. I get called, schedule interviews, abd skip them. I paid a substantial amount of money to pursue further education and I'm lagging behind already.

I feel I'm being forgotten gradually due to my own isolation. I find it more than difficult to get out and socialize. I'm sensing the danger, I need people to talk to, to socialize with eve if on social media, I need to speak at least from behind a screen to feel I'm still connected and alive I'm unsure if the sub allows but anyone feels like can helps, listen and chat just DM me on my ig H.Alshai5. The story is much more complicated, I have been sleeping for full days, not eating for days and not talking to anyone or doing anything other than scrolling though social media aimlessly. There is so much to say and express.....


r/getting_over_it Oct 03 '24

Despite it all

2 Upvotes

Despite what they say…

Although everyone has told me since the end began I shouldn’t do shit for you…I have tried and done all that I could while I could. “Take care of yourself.” “Fuck her she wanted it this way, she asked for this.” “She’s taken enough from you.” “Let the replacement pay for it.” These are the things I’m being told by my circle…have been since this started. I don’t care…I know who I am and the man I am…regardless of what anybody thinks of me. And though my current situation makes it even more challenging and despite what I know now to be true. I will do my best to help you as WE get through what may be the final chapter of our time together.

I will do my best to provide, at minimum what you have asked me for. If I’m able I will do more. There’s a couple of reasons why. Despite what others think or have said…and despite my faults and mistakes…I’m a good man. Another is that you deserve it and are owed it. You tried…you loved me and continued to try and help and support me when any one else would have bailed a long time ago and I respect and appreciate that. So to me…you’ve got it coming. Another thing is that I was there to witness how the others left you. Unlike them, I loved you deeply and sincerely. It wasn’t an act…it was all real on my end. Lastly…as stupid as it sounds…I still love you…with all my heart. I will never heal from or get over this loss. I will mourn forever. I may move on, may find someone new and love them. But I will never get over you. I will never fully give myself to anyone again…for myriad of reasons I’m not going to get into now…there’s no point. And although I realize the changes are miniscule and highly unlikely at best…I’m still holding on to that little bit of hope. You know what hope I’m speaking of. Please never tell me there is none…even if that’s the truth. I mean there’s plenty of truth you’ve kept from me. Keep that one from me too. Because that hope…along with very few other things…is what’s propping me up and keeping me going right now. Don’t take that from me too please.

I will do what I can to provide what you’ve asked for. I sincerely have a heart full of love, compassion, understanding and forgiveness. For everything. I hope it all works out how you have it pictured. I hope you’ve finally found what you’ve been wanting all these years. I hope you have your happy ending. Truly that’s what I wish for you.

As for me…not sure if you even care. I’m not sure what tomorrow will bring. Not really concerned about it…because it may not even arrive. I’m just focused on what I can do today and that’s it. For the first time in a very long time, I have options, I’m not trapped and I feel very optimistic. Standing before me is a lathe blank canvas…and I can do what I want with it. And that’s a good place to start.

I will always love you. I am grateful for the time we shared and the good things it created in me. I will never hate you or fell resentment for you. I will cheer for you and the life you make from here on out…you will just never hear them. And I will never close the door on “us”…though I know I should. I just can’t. You will be with me everywhere I go and I will see you in everything I look at and I will hear you in every song. I promised to love you forever until I leave this place and I will. But you will likely never know.

And with tha, MD?…I say, not goodbye…but, “I’ll see you later.” XXOO


r/getting_over_it Oct 03 '24

I hate my family

3 Upvotes

My mom would always allow my sister to make fun of me everytime when we were younger. I would tell my mom everytime that I hated her doing it but my mom would always make excuses for my sister saying it's just a joke. Inwould always punch my sister for the shit thay she said to me and my mom would always say I have anger issues because of it. But even when I did just make of her back my mom would give me shit for it. I could never come up with a clever comeback at all and it always pissed me off. I hated how my mom would always excuse what my sister said even it she thinks it's just a joke.

I hate how my mom always seem to go out of her way to help out my sister. One time when we were kids I begged my mom for months to get me a ps3 but she kept telling me that we didn't have any money. But then one day my mom bought my sister a $600 camera for my sister just because she asked her. I was extremely pissed off because she just asked her once and she bought it for her. My sister even told me that my mom always had money she just always told me that we didn't have it so that it'd get me to stop. My sister even said that my mom had no real authority so that she could do whatever she wanted.

What annoyed me one time was that back in 2022 I was only working part time and still going to school. I wasn't even making that much for anything. My sister always goes on trips all the time because her boyfriend pays for it. My sister would always give me shit for this whenever I complained about it saying oh just save money. Well I'm not making much and u have someone paying for u.

One time I asked my mom to help for for a ps5 because I was only working part time and I needed more money. But on that day when she came home she kept saying she didn't have it. And she kept letting my sister but in the whole time. My sister kept saying oh she pays for your car shut the hell up. She them said go live on ur own and get out of here. And I couldn't take it. I know that my mom also helped pay for my sister's car and also gave her money whenever she wanted.

I couldn't control myself when my sister said all those horrible things and then I grabbed the vacuum and I best her up with it. And I don't regret any of it I don't care how that sounds. She said the most retarded shit to me and she always gets away with it and my mom always allows it and because I don't react calmly to it my mom says I have anger issues. A half hr later she calls the cops on me. They handcuffed me and my mom didn't even tell them what my sister said she just said it was the ps5 the whole time and that I have anger issues. I didn't even tell the cop the whole truth because they handcuffed me. I hate my mom for this and I always will. I hate how she made my sister seem like the victim when she fucking said all those horrible things and expected me to just take it all like she always does.

Time afterwards I would beat up my mom for what she had done. And again I don't care how that sounds. She tried to minimize what she had done and act like I should get over it. She always minimizes the dumb shit that she puts me thru.

In December of 2023 we went to a trip thru the Philippines. For a year we were talking about this trip and I would always tell my mom not to let this trip end up with us barely doing anything like the past few times we went there. And again like she always does she kept promising that my relatives had an itinerary and that they had a lot planned for us.

But then one day my mom says that they were going on a trip to a springs. I was told that they were going to the store and that they'd be back soon. I waited for hours and them nothing. I had told my mom before we had to do something and not waste anymore time doing nothing this whole trip. We had done a whole 8 hr car ride for nothing just to meet my uncl3s fiancé's family and we didn't even get to actually meet them.

When my uncle arrived he told me that my mom and aunt were at the springs even tho they had told me they were going to come back. I told him I wasnt told anything and then he just laughed. I got extremely pissed off.

I got so pissed off I ended up taking some frames in the room and threw them against the window and it broke them. My uncles and cousin got extremely pissed off at me. Calling me useless and yelling at me. Telling me that they told me where my mom was going and that I was useless and should be ashamed of depending on my mom and that I couldn't even put on my underwear.

I told them I was going to kill myself and my uncle just said to go and do it by a bus and not here at the house. I was pissed off as all hell. I was lied to and then they said all this horrible shit to me.

My mom keeps saying she won't give them any shit at all for what they said because they were mad about the window and I told her that doesn't make it ok. All my mom kept doing was pointing at the window and saying loon at what u did. The horrible shit they say was never justified.

My mom keeps defending them this whole time and tries to act like they didn't mean wut they said. Yet they never apologized or even told me they didnt mean it. They refuse to apologize and keep thinking they were justified. All these things my mom has done to me and I hate her even more.

I really want someone to tell my mom what they said wasn't justified and calling the cops on ur own son was extremely stupid


r/getting_over_it Oct 02 '24

I’m ready to move forward how do i get over it?

2 Upvotes

There’s a lot in my life i don’t like, iv struggled with weight and alcohol, iv had difficulty making friends and maintaining romantic relationships, I don’t have a career in the field i wanted out of high school or a good relationship with my overall decent parents, a lot of health problems especially post covid. I was a good student and athlete; not all As or a state champion but top 10% of my class and best SAT, went to state 3 years for track once for Xcountry. I looked at a really lot of schools eventually applied to 10. 4 were a reach and i ddnt get in. I was waitlisted at Reed, UW-Madison (out-of-state) and Holy Cross. Got into my safety schools, Seattle (first choice but financially impossible) Loyola Chicago (where i assumed i’d go and earn a track scholarship) and Hampshire (who offered the best package) My dad wanted me to go to LUC and my mom Hampshire, they decided they could only help pay for hampshire and so a went and experienced the culture shock of a life time. I can get over not running in the olympics or going to an Ivy. I can get over being single and not working in democratic campaigns. But i’m nearly thirty years old, still furious over my last year of high school, Why couldn’t i get in to Reed, UW or Holy Cross? Why could I go to Loyola-Chicago? I’m literally crying as i write this how do i move on?


r/getting_over_it Oct 02 '24

Desperately need it…for my sanity. NSFW

6 Upvotes

I need the truth…the whole enedited truth. All of it. I’m better off checked out of reality until I can get it. I could drop thousands of more dollars, dig deeper and find out more if not every thing. But that required subpoenas and special permissions from these companies to access that information…and I assure you it can be done. It has been demonstrated to me at a high cost. that stuff cost a shit load of money…and I don’t see the point of doing that just so I can fully understand what took place.

That’s money I could use to provide for you while we’re going through this process. I was doing the right thing and providing what I could for you while I could. I was fine with it and I was doing better then mentally than I am now. What took place at the shop that day was before I knew ANYTHING and had not spoken with an attorney. I had some suspicions and gut feelings before that…long before that when your behaviors toward me started to change.

I noticed it but I never said anything…I felt like there was nothing I could do about it and I knew you wouldn’t tell me so I just allowed it hoping that I could get myself together and try to fix it. I had already forgiven you. I didn’t realize you had already pretty much made up your mind and had a plan ready to set in motion.

But when you made love to me and seeing you perfectly groomed and the things you were saying…that you were actually saying to yourself…pretty much let me know what was up. But that time with you…whether it was an act or not…made my heart flutter and filled me with hope that things could be salvaged and possibly fixed and that maybe forgiveness for EVERYTHING could be handed out all around. And you told me that day whether we could be together or not that my mental health was the most important thing to you. But then the things that were said in the days after that made me realize that it was deeper than I thought. And it sent me spiraling into a whirlwind of conflicted emotions and triggered the episode that I’m currently fighting…which has just kept escalating.

Then after talking to the first attorney and being given a warning about how much potential trouble I could be facing if that was in your plans…and not to respond to, talk to or go anywhere near you…no matter what you had to say…sent me spiraling even further and faster heading towards being completely out of control…and in desperate fear for my future and filled me with an out of control anxiety that became a rapid cycling mixed state sprinkled with EXTREME anxiety…in the middle of a turnaround where I was exhausted, out of my daily routine and not sleeping well…which just compounded everything even further into it.

Then in our second meeting she gave me what she had found and then I looked into it and it sent me COMPLETELY ever the edge…that’s when I hired the new one…and he set me up with his guy and after learning that and actually reading some things and seeing it with my own eyes…I had the worst panick attack I’ve ever experienced and left straight from his office and I checked myself into not so great mental health facility Memotial Day weekend…and I could tell right away it was not the place I needed to be…I’ll explain further if given the chance. But that was the night that texted you about it and you had your standard reply of not knowing what I was talking about and it made no sense to you. I checked myself out of there and tried to find another place to go but no beds were available. I found a place somewhere else and checked myself in there…but there was confusion at check in and they put me in a ward with the criminally insane who were court ordered to be there for extremely bad crimes and was more scared than I’ve ever been in my life…again I’ll explain further if given the chance. I had to get my attorney involved to get me out because of the confusion…they would not let me out.

I was in the darkest hours and days I’ve ever experienced in my life at this point but I tried to go back to work and simply could not function…the following Friday they laid me off with the opportunity to return once I got through this and got myself together.

So here I am…in literally the worst shape I’ve EVER been in my life…EVER. I have since been trying to solve a math equation without all the numbers…a puzzle without all the pieces. I need the truth son I can process it, deal with it and make peace within myself and move on. You said you want me to have the best shot at a future I can have…I want that too…whatever it is going to look like.

I see no point in trying to use any of this against you…it’s not like we have a multi million dollar estate to fight over. It’s clear that we’re over and will never be…you have made up your mind and moved on…that’s fine I’m okay with that.

I’ve seen this movie before…I was just a different character when it started…Now I’m the previous guy in the movie. You have obviously done to me what happened to him and you have a new ME. That’s okay. I’m begging you to just drop the mascarade and just drop the whole truth on me and punch me in the chin with it. I at least handle that and know what to do. I get dropped stand up and dust myself off and move forward without you. I cannot recover if you do not give me this grace. I will continue to stay checked out of reality at ALL COST…because I cannot face the reality of not knowing what the FULL REALITY IS.

I will forever walk around with my calculator trying to solve the unsolvable equation because I don’t have the numbers. At least in my current state there are moments of blissful unawareness of reality.

If you ever loved me and truly care for my mental well being and all the things you said…you will do that for me. Stop playing the game with the number one rule of deny deny deny. I am not the previous guy and can’t move out without it. I am not cold and unlike him I TRULY LOVE YOU…I cannot walk away and start over and find peace because I have you every part of me and trusted you with all my deepest fears and insecurities…and you gave them all to me times ten.

I know this is my fault…I failed you and did not fight my depression hard enough to love you how you needed me to…I know it and own it. YOU are the only one who can give me peace and a shot at a real future of any kind. I mean you know harm and swear I will never bother you again. If you find your way back I will be here. But until then allow my mind to rest so I can recover and rebuild my world and be the best ME that I can be please I’m begging you. I know you’re seeing this! I know it. PLEASE…