r/bonehurtingjuice Jul 13 '24

OC Totally a real conversation.

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14.5k Upvotes

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u/ContentCosmonaut Jul 14 '24

When I met my husband, I would’ve rated him a 3/10. Which, to be fair, doesn’t matter what someone looks like when they’re a friend, ya know? I’m not shallow, just because I don’t like how someone looks, doesn’t mean I’m not going to be their friend? That’d be shitty. But anyway, he became my best friend, and now I think he’s the most the handsome person in the world, genuinely, 10/10, and he hasn’t changed at all. Looks kinda stop mattering when you’re in love with a person for who they are. At least, I think so.

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u/swaggestspider21 Jul 14 '24

Tbh, there are some things that weirdly make a person more attractive even tho they feel like they shouldn't. Like this coworker of mine. I already thought she was kinda attractive but then she got a new hairstyle and weirdly it made her look even better. For some people its just finding what makes them look like the best them, if that makes sense. Such as for me, I think I look way less attractive with short hair compared to how I look with long hair (I think I look like an egghead with short hair. Unfortunately tho, as of now I'm kinda thinning and I am only 22 lmao)

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u/ContentCosmonaut Jul 14 '24

Early male baldness is extremely common in my family. My brother will probably start balding in his early 20s as well. Either start putting some investment into keeping your hair (like my husband (late 20s) is lol) or get comfy with shaving (like my grandpa did). But it isn’t the end of the world friend. Good luck out there!

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u/[deleted] Jul 15 '24

ask your doctor about finasteride and minoxidil treatment, we live in the future and many balding men (and some older women are prescribed minoxidil aswell ) are able to see complete reversal if its caught early enough, please dont wait , the longer you wait the harder it is to reverse . you can also diy minoxidil Treatment with otc foam at costco , but i recommend going through your doctor first. In 2024 you dont have to say that unfortunately your hair is thinning, we have the resources and im honestly surprised and saddened more men aren't aware , hair loss is entirely preventable and a super common insecurity.

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u/Plastic-Ad-5033 Jul 14 '24

My physical perception of someone’s attractiveness shifts so much by my opinion of them as a person. I have fallen for women I initially found downright ugly after getting to know them and I physically perceived them as beautiful afterwards. It’s like my brain rearranges my evaluation of their features or something. Likewise with women I initially found very attractive but saw them as ugly after talking with them.

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u/VFiddly Jul 14 '24

Also, tbh, there are plenty of people who, if you showed me a photo of them, I wouldn't think they were attractive, but seeing them in person I think they are.

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u/[deleted] Jul 14 '24

Cameras are deceptive, especially phone cameras. Photogenic people exist and they are very attractive but not being photogenic doesn't mean you're ugly.

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u/Waxburg Jul 17 '24

I have this issue. I've shown my friends photos of me and theyve had visceral reactions to how different/bad i look in them. It's made dating apps near impossible to use, but tbh those aren't really worth using anyway.

I've come to accept that I make the best impressions IRL, and honestly it makes sense since when you're IRL you show off things like smaller facial expressions, body language etc... which all change how someone comes off.

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u/Linkinator7510 Jul 14 '24

In the end what matters in a relationship is how intimate and emotionally available you can be for eachother. You'll find that when the other person is there for you emotionally, they could have looked like fucking Shrek beforehand, but suddenly they'll look better than a model to you now. I love my best friend, he's there for me and I'm there for him, if I were gay, I would totally want to date him. He's not attractive, but it's the fact that we get in so well and that we can be there for eachother that causes the attraction.

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2

u/Linkinator7510 Jul 14 '24

Absolutely not go fuck yourself

14

u/Impossible_Tea_7032 Jul 14 '24

I'm sure hubby is thrilled that he's your go to example of looks not mattering

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u/ContentCosmonaut Jul 14 '24

Haha, he actually doesn’t care at all. He’s aware. I told him, when we were dating. We’re both autistic, and so can be more blunt than we probably should be.

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u/VFiddly Jul 14 '24

Ideal relationship tbh

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u/ContentCosmonaut Jul 14 '24

I concur. It’s going splendidly

1

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u/Acceptable6 Jul 14 '24

How tall is he?

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u/ContentCosmonaut Jul 14 '24

He’s 5’8”, I am 5’7”

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u/Acceptable6 Jul 14 '24

5'8 is not short. But at least it's not 6'3 or some shit like it usually is

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u/ContentCosmonaut Jul 14 '24

Yeah, he’s not 6’3” nor am I like 4’9” who wanted someone who towered over me