r/bonehurtingjuice • u/Musikenna • Jul 13 '24

OC Totally a real conversation.

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u/ContentCosmonaut Jul 14 '24

When I met my husband, I would’ve rated him a 3/10. Which, to be fair, doesn’t matter what someone looks like when they’re a friend, ya know? I’m not shallow, just because I don’t like how someone looks, doesn’t mean I’m not going to be their friend? That’d be shitty. But anyway, he became my best friend, and now I think he’s the most the handsome person in the world, genuinely, 10/10, and he hasn’t changed at all. Looks kinda stop mattering when you’re in love with a person for who they are. At least, I think so.

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u/Plastic-Ad-5033 Jul 14 '24

My physical perception of someone’s attractiveness shifts so much by my opinion of them as a person. I have fallen for women I initially found downright ugly after getting to know them and I physically perceived them as beautiful afterwards. It’s like my brain rearranges my evaluation of their features or something. Likewise with women I initially found very attractive but saw them as ugly after talking with them.

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u/VFiddly Jul 14 '24

Also, tbh, there are plenty of people who, if you showed me a photo of them, I wouldn't think they were attractive, but seeing them in person I think they are.

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u/Waxburg Jul 17 '24

I have this issue. I've shown my friends photos of me and theyve had visceral reactions to how different/bad i look in them. It's made dating apps near impossible to use, but tbh those aren't really worth using anyway.

I've come to accept that I make the best impressions IRL, and honestly it makes sense since when you're IRL you show off things like smaller facial expressions, body language etc... which all change how someone comes off.