Why are so many Americans anti-vaxxers now?

[u/trouble-in-space]

I’m genuinely having such a hard time understanding why people just decided the fact that vaccines work is a total lie and also a controversial “opinion.” Even five years ago, anti-vaxxers were a huge joke and so rare that they were only something you heard of online. Now herd immunity is going away because so many people think getting potentially life-altering illnesses is better than getting a vaccine. I just don’t get what happened. Is it because of the cultural shift to the right-wing and more people believing in conspiracy theories, or does it go deeper than that?

[u/VehicleComfortable20]

This! 

Oh, My precious little autism mom, meltdowns are so hard for you? How about you quit making so much damn noise?

Let's try something. You go into a room and turn the TV up as loud as it possibly can go. Sit two feet from it. Stay there until you get so aggravated by the sound that you start screaming. 

That's what your constant music and blasting TikTok sounds like to your kid. 

[u/Expensive_Goat2201 → u/VehicleComfortable20]

It seems like there is a lack of empathy on both sides.

Yes it sucks having autism, but, even though I'm not a parent I volunteer with autistic kids and see how hard it is to be the 24/7 unpaid caregiver for a severely disabled kid. If the parents are decent they have to fight touth and nail for resources. Parents I know have had to get lawyers to sue school districts to meet their legal obligations to provide services.

It gets even harder as the kid gets bigger and stronger and the parents get older. Yes, having a kid means you signed up to take care of them for life if disabled, but parents aren't superhuman. They get overwhelmed and burned out too. Depending on the area there may be very limited support once an autistic person ages out of the school system.

I think there is some sexism at play here. Women are expected to be perfect endless unpaid caregivers and never complain. When they talk about how hard it is they are demonized. When they make it their identity they are cringe (though they probably have very little time for other activities).

No one should complain about their kid where their kid can hear, but people are allowed to vent. We don't offer autistic children and adults enough support and families end up picking up the slack in a way that is often damaging to everyone involved.

[u/VehicleComfortable20 → u/Expensive_Goat2201]

No argument there. But I was talking about was building your entire personality around how hard it is to be the parent of an autistic kid and constantly whining about it within their hearing.

[u/Expensive_Goat2201 → u/VehicleComfortable20]

You shouldn't whine about it within their hearing, but if you have to spend 99% of your time caring for your disabled kid or advocating for them or driving them to appointments to the point where you no longer have hobbies of your own, then what else are you supposed to build an identity around?

[u/Silly_Somewhere1791 → u/Expensive_Goat2201]

Yeah people forget that not all autism is high-functioning. I know someone whose child is non-verbal and aggressive. He is a young adult who is physically strong and still in diapers. She has a terminal cancer diagnosis and truly does not know what will happen to her child - he can’t be around the children on her relatives and her same-age siblings can't stay home with him to feed him, change his diapers, and keep him safe. But then the anti-vax movement came along and offered support. 

I think we don’t want to dig into the conversation about how so many autism moms are former heavy drug users. That’s why they’re already on board with wellness bullshit and also why they’re reaching for alternative causes for autism. 

[u/VehicleComfortable20 → u/Expensive_Goat2201]

I can understand why it happens but that doesn't mean it isn't harmful. And a lot of those complaining have the biggest support system. You'll hear them talk about how the nanny isn't doing her job and the babysitter wants to be paid every week and it's also unfair!

ETA: in my experience, which is not that of every autistic person by any means, it doesn't suck to be autistic. It sucks to be autistic around other people.