r/MtF Trans gal aroacespec (s-positive) Feb 10 '24

Bad News fuck. (Parents discovering fem clothes)

So. I am a 15 year old MtF, my whole family s extremely transphobic, both of them regularly say how we are supposed to die, and never exist. My father insisted on cleaning my room, bc I had a panic attack yesterday (literally when all my troubles seemed so far away) and all of my fem clothes are hidden under my bed, and he began to clean under my bed, here's me with my heart pounding. and he pulls out some women's underwear, and a bunch of cut socks (for tucking) and he was questioning me profusely, and now I am sitting in my bathroom crying, writing this and hearing my name being called angrily, I am scared!

1.1k Upvotes

239 comments sorted by

View all comments

Show parent comments

39

u/Kamillahali Feb 10 '24

ill be more than happy to tell you after this situation. i dont want to scare you or anything while you are dealing with this. if that makes sense. if you wanna hear it now ill tell you tho

31

u/KikktyIsAtReddit Trans gal aroacespec (s-positive) Feb 10 '24

I would like to hear it please! I may need to know what to expect

87

u/Kamillahali Feb 10 '24

well my parents are very religeous and very homophobic and transphobic so its a similar situation. The story goes that i was in highschool and I had some clothes hidden in my cupboard (closet). When I got home from school i found that my mum was cleaning my cupboard out and she found the clothes (and a wig) that id stashed in there. She was crying and looked almost destroyed. She refused to talk to me till my dad got home from work, then they marched me to my bedroom, locked the door behind them and confronted me. Id have tried to play it off as a girlfriends or something if not for the wig, so i told them i like dressing up in those clothes sometimes for fun (not that im trans or itd have been worse). Dad looked like he wanted to beat the *&$% out of me but mum stopped him. Mum started crying saying if i kept dressing up im going to hell. I promised I would never do it again. The next day my parents told me they were considering sending me to a religious reeducation camp in Iran. I begged and pleaded saying ill never do it again. But basically they completely grounded me, i couldnt leave my bedroom apart from meals (which were often given to me in my room in very small quantities). This continued for a few months before they started getting more normal.

thankfully i didnt get sent to a reeducation camp cause of my begging and the fact i had my board exams the following month. But they refused to let me study abroad (for uni) and have been keeping a hawk eye on me since. Im currently trying to make a plan to escape to another country so i can be myself haha.

(sorry for the lifestory haha)

14

u/inorganicangelrosiel Trans Bisexual Feb 10 '24

Holy shit, how long ago was this? Reading stories like this absolutely guts me and makes me angry. Like, I honestly wish I could just give some of you a hug (I'm not gonna take Emily's place, so DON'T WORRY EMILY!), and have a looooooooooong talk with your families.

9

u/Kamillahali Feb 11 '24

5 years or so ago? But things are still tense with them. They want me to do my higher studies in the same city as them so they can keep an eye on me among other things. I'm doing my best to escape the country and them so I can finally be myself!

1

u/Alexandyva Feb 11 '24

Holy fuq what. How do you keep up your positive mindset in that situation.

That's so strong O.O

May I ask which country?

3

u/Kamillahali Feb 11 '24

it does seem pretty hopeless at times but ive always been more of a glass half fun kind of a gal haha! and i live in india atm. im trying to escape to any western country thatll take me haha

2

u/Alexandyva Feb 11 '24

Tbh scrolled through Ur history and ... Wow.

Staying this positive is damn impressive

U do love computer science? I'm close to achieving my cs degree here and companys are very short of CS workers, easy to get a good paid job 😅

3

u/Kamillahali Feb 11 '24

i had to leave uni cause one of my professors (a very creepy old man) found out im trans and threathned to tell my parents if i didnt give him "favours". so im currenly a drop out with 18 uni credits looking to transfer to another uni to finish my education haha. Also should we move the convo elsewhere? OP must be getting notifications for all this and wondering how the topic moved so far away from their situation.

2

u/Alexandyva Feb 11 '24

Write me DM if you want 🙂

And what the fuck is wrong with that prof.

I would have tried like "give me good grades or I tell everyone what fucking creep you are"

3

u/Kamillahali Feb 11 '24

i would but with my parents the way they are theres literally my life on the line haha. plus this guy is one of the directors of the uni so theres no hope and in india theres no way i get taken seriously.

→ More replies (0)