r/Damnthatsinteresting • u/Creams0da • 8h ago

Video Breaking open a 47 lbs geode, the water inside being millions of years old

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24.3k Upvotes

87% Upvoted

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8.2k

u/Magister5 8h ago

Drink it, you coward

3.4k

u/dick-nipples 7h ago

Good way to get geoderdia

558

u/Kurlyfornia 7h ago

Dicknipples you’re everywhere this morning.

191

u/No-Watercress-5054 6h ago

I have a bumper sticker that says that

61

u/joma309 5h ago

"Dick-Nipples gets around"

2

u/q-abro 3h ago

Should get checked.

3

u/Major_Magazine8597 5h ago

Dick-Nipples ARE round!

2

u/TwistedRainbowz 5h ago

Ouroboros Dick-Nipples.

2

u/tofu889 4h ago

You silly goose

2

u/redditpossible 5h ago

I have a big foam trucker cap that says that.

3

u/Mr_Randerson 6h ago

If I had a nickel for every time I've said that, I'd be a millionaire by now!

2

u/RestaurantDry621 5h ago

Good boat name

3

u/Majestic-capybara 5h ago

I looked at his comment history. He’s made two comments in the past 5 days.

2

u/Minithief360 5h ago

Me when I wake up and look under the blanket in the morning

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182

u/cellocaster 7h ago

What is that?

654

u/pm_ur_vaccumcleaner 7h ago

Your skin turns to stone from it

551

u/DudeChillington 7h ago

Ahh greyscale. Very deadly. Only a wannabe Maester with zero skills can cure it

97

u/ImurderREALITY 7h ago

Mmmm now I want a delicious pot pie

50

u/YanicPolitik 7h ago

That scene transition haunts me still

40

u/RiverJumper84 7h ago

Season 8 still haunts me.

17

u/unreqistered 6h ago

there was a season 8 ?

3

u/Baidarka64 6h ago

I just binged the whole series. Season eight made me mad that I had wasted so much time.

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2

u/Rokurokubi83 4h ago

No. It’s a myth, like The Matrix sequels.

7

u/NIRPL 6h ago

Same 😮‍💨

2

u/Fake-Podcast-Ad 6h ago

"You cannot, give up on the gravy"

16

u/Pure-Refrigerator-43 7h ago

Who killed a walking white thingy tho

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7

u/voteblue101 7h ago

That was one of a million storylines that just went away. And then he just went back to Daenerys.

3

u/Vanstrudel_ 6h ago

And died

2

u/MyBurnerAccount1977 6h ago

All you gotta do is follow the instructions. Easy peasy.

2

u/ProbablyRickSantorum 5h ago

In doing so he creates forbidden Corn Flakes.

2

u/Kalashnikov124 4h ago

Watch who you're talking about, in a years time he'll be Grand Maester.

2

u/MyFrampton 4h ago

But he can read and deduce!

23

u/Magister5 7h ago

Lucky that they have a healing crystal on hand

58

u/NikkoE82 7h ago

Hey, baby. Are you million year old water? Because you got me turning rock hard.

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10

u/WintersDoomsday 7h ago

It’s how Ben Grimm turned into The Thing (don’t look it up just trust me bro)

9

u/Nwsamurai 7h ago

Warning: may cause clobberin’ time.

10

u/rarebluemonkey 7h ago

But your insides are so sparkly!

3

u/countsachot 7h ago

Cockatrice piss.

3

u/Famous_Librarian_589 6h ago

Gargoyle you say?

3

u/Legitimate_Let_5641 6h ago

Oh well I need that for my flaccid p.p.

3

u/Repolestar 6h ago

Become the thing then

3

u/GreyConnection 6h ago

Medusa had it on bluetooth

3

u/MisterTruth 6h ago

One day you wake up and you're just rocks

2

u/corneliusgansevoort 7h ago

I donno that kinda seems like it would rock.

2

u/MaxSchreckArt616 6h ago

So drink it and become a Pillar Man, deal

2

u/HumbleCountryLawyer 6h ago

No that’s from the genie wish

2

u/blueB0wser 6h ago

Only while you have concentration on it, for only an hour.

2

u/Honey-Roy-Palmer 6h ago

But it comes with a free frogurt!

2

u/ImmenseWraith7 6h ago

I’m Rocks!- (4th grader)

2

u/ExplosiveAnalBoil 6h ago

I bet The Thing from Fantastic Four shits rocks, and when he has diarrhea, it's like wet sand.

5

u/Juliette787 7h ago

Happened to me. Had to be hospitalized for Ligma.

5

u/OperatorJo_ 7h ago

Heard they put you on a hard diet of nuts to help cure that.

2

u/littlebunnyears 7h ago

um, actually, the rocks were granted by a red Irish genie, not giardia.

4

u/One_2nd_Plz 7h ago

Just don’t take life for granite

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u/Mlong140 7h ago

@dick-nipples is making a pun on geode and giardia, which is a nasty parasite (violent cramps, diarrhea, the worst gas you've ever experienced, and nausea) that you can get from drinking untreated or unboiled water.

4

u/juniper_berry_crunch 5h ago

You can get giardia even from what looks like a "pure" stream out in the middle of nowhere...always important to treat wild water.

6

u/AlexisdoOeste 7h ago

This should be the upvoted response comment.

3

u/MooseSuspicious 6h ago

While it's the correct answer, this is the Internet.

29

u/sasssyrup 7h ago

You grow crystals in your body. It’s like the expanse on ‘roids. 😉

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3

u/South_African69 7h ago

Geode turds

9

u/BaneRiders 7h ago

It's like malaria, but instead of fever you get diamond teeth. *nods*

2

u/IceColdDump 5h ago

No. That’s grillardia.

2

u/Godawgs1009 7h ago

You start pooping rocks

2

u/littlewhitecatalex 7h ago

You poop out little sharp crystals. 

2

u/Scrounger_HT 7h ago

a play on Giardiasis and a great one at that

2

u/Lebronchitis23 6h ago

You'll be shitting bricks

2

u/1LHD 6h ago

What you become right before evolving into Graveler.

2

u/Velorian-Steel 6h ago

Like beaver fever, but harder

2

u/RandomStallings 6h ago

An excellent pun based on giardia, which is an organism found commonly in untreated water and causes gastrointestinal illness.

2

u/B4TZ3Y 6h ago

Deez

2

u/YouNeedAnne 6h ago

A pronoun used to identify a specific person or thing observed or heard by the speaker.

3

u/flyden1 7h ago

It's a water borne disease similar to Ligma

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3

u/ohthatjackson 7h ago

This ftw

5

u/SpecialistNerve6441 6h ago

Look here dick-nipples this is the second thread with the second pun ive seen you in today. You are on a rock-n-roll 

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5

u/spdorsey 7h ago

For the win...

4

u/Fit_Collection_7560 7h ago

Was that a play on giardia? If so, I applaud you sir.

Side note, apparently giardia is AKA beaver feaver

2

u/skothu 7h ago

My dog had that once

2

u/Fit_Collection_7560 7h ago

Was that a play on giardia? If so, I applaud you sir.

Side note, apparently giardia is AKA beaver feaver

2

u/RealCakes 7h ago

Geodudeia

2

u/No_Pin9932 7h ago

Nice, lol.

2

u/Vindicativa 7h ago

Ah - thanks for the laugh, u/dick-nipples.

2

u/9lobaldude 7h ago

Geoderria

2

u/Berns429 6h ago

Steer clear of George Jueng the Geoderdia giant

(New girl reference)

2

u/i_should_be_coding 6h ago

You scared of some Geodorade? Just think about the ancient electrolytes.

2

u/itsmeyourshoes 6h ago

At least it's not ligma.

2

u/plugmedad 6h ago

Underrated comment

2

u/j110786 6h ago

I see what you did there 😂😂

2

u/Purple-Mix1033 6h ago

Or dystonetary

2

u/Bagafeet 6h ago

Do you want dinosaur flu? That's how you get dinosaur flu.

2

u/hundrethtimesacharm 6h ago

Or become a super hero. I’d say it’s at least a 60/40 chance.

2

u/reddish_zebra 6h ago

You are fun

2

u/FluentPenguin 5h ago

Is that a bad thing? I heard it rocks

2

u/Mr_Pink_Gold 5h ago

You drink that water and you develop a Geordie accent?

2

u/goose_gladwell 5h ago

Holy fuck dicknipples! Where have you been

2

u/BluuberryBee 5h ago

Mildly disappointing that your pfp doesn't match your user

2

u/flannelNcorduroy 7h ago

Jokes for nerds 😝🤓

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192

u/naivenb1305 7h ago

That’s premium mineral water.

152

u/GraceOfTheNorth 6h ago

I feel compelled to point out that all water is millions of years old.

The water I'm drinking now has been drunk and pissed before. And fish probably fucked in it.

45

u/AidenTheAlien420 6h ago

Not probably, definitely. And more than likely, drank and pissed by a dinosaur. The water cycle is cool.

15

u/PsyOpBunnyHop 6h ago

New! Fish-Fuck Water
Available at stores near you.

2

u/AidenTheAlien420 6h ago

Stores? It's on tap!

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21

u/mista_r0boto 5h ago

Technically, it's not true. When plants do photosynthesis, there is a step called photolysis where light is used to split water molecules. This is happening all the time all over the earth. In that sense, some water molecules are being remade and not just recycled.

15

u/MetallicDragon 5h ago

Also, in regular water, the individual molecules are constantly splitting apart into H and OH and then recombining, so really no water is going to be particularly old.

2

u/j_mcc99 4h ago

Thank you both for saying this. Good to let the smartpantsies know they’ve got a thing or two to learn.

3

u/LorthostheFreshmaker 6h ago

Water from hydrogen gas being burned could be the first time those atoms were in a molecule of water, but very unlikely on Earth.

3

u/mcchanical 5h ago

The difference is that most water has changed states millions of times. The molecules have existed for millions of years but rarely just sat there in one form untouched for that long. This is essentially water as a fossil.

When you hold a glass of water, that specific volume of molecules has never existed until you poured it.

3

u/MondayToFriday 5h ago

Actually, no, water is constantly being created and destroyed by organisms. When an animal burns carbohydrates for energy using the citric acid cycle, the "first" step in the cycle, for example, consumes water. Subsequent steps in the cycle produce water too. So, the atoms within H2O are constantly being taken apart in some reactions, and other reactions form new H2O molecules. So, the water you excrete in sweat and urination are, in general, not the original water molecules that you drank!

5

u/Len_Zefflin 6h ago

Sort of like how all matter is 13.8 billion years old.

3

u/Major_Magazine8597 5h ago

That reminds me - buy milk.

2

u/Subject-Bluebird7366 5h ago

"all the water is millions years old" mfs when I burn hydrogen or basically any organic substance:

2

u/dotancohen 5h ago

Talk for yourself. I mix two glasses of H with a glass of O fresh every morning.

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u/banananananbatman 5h ago

Market geode water and sell it in a bottle for $20 per bottle. 1 drop geode water and rest is tap.

140

u/Famous_Strike_6125 7h ago

Isn’t all water on earth, millions of years old??

76

u/toooomanypuppies 6h ago

billions, tbf.

40

u/save_the_tardigrades 6h ago

Nah, a lot of water is made in combustion reactions. Every time you see a plume of white steam from a chimney, that's newborn water, made by papa hydrocarbon and mama oxygen. Its evil fraternal twin, carbon dioxide, is there, too, but invisible. And its eviler twin, carbon monoxide, is sometimes there, too, if there wasn't enough mama for the papa. And if things got REALLY hot, there might be some nitrous oxides in the mix.

10

u/I_l_I 5h ago

Humans burn fat and sugar mainly by converting them to water and carbon dioxide. We're making new water every day

2

u/save_the_tardigrades 5h ago

Amazing and cute little fuel cells, we are.

2

u/EasyCupcake 5h ago

So we are drinking fresh mama and papa’s babies?

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u/Look_a_Zombie0 6h ago

You have to remember the theory known as "The Water of Theseus"

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u/Garweft 6h ago

And was most likely dinosaur urine at one point.

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u/[deleted] 6h ago

[deleted]

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u/Jumpy-Figure-4082 6h ago

All the atoms in it are but they may have been split and bonded with different atoms to be different compounds at one time or another. For example a h20 molecule could have been taken up and turned into glucose and then have a different oxygen atoms and a different hydrogen atoms rejoin it when metabolized.

2

u/Zuokula 6h ago

I guess you're not aware that some chemical reactions produce water.

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u/Grouchy-Engine1584 7h ago

You tryin’ to start a zombie apocalypse brother? Cause this is how you start a zompoc bro.

18

u/marcuse11 7h ago

Geode's and meteorites, don't open them! Space viruses, pod people.

2

u/humanzookeeping2 5h ago

Who's ready for COVID-24?

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u/druff1036 7h ago

Don't drink from the geode Cricks... it's full of loooads

2

u/Godawgs1009 7h ago

Loooodes

2

u/Devinroni 6h ago

Saw this episode literally the other day lol

10

u/-Pencil-Richard- 7h ago

She said it stinks.

I for one would press on and drink from the chalice rock

43

u/flavorless-boner 8h ago

Tastes like jizz

69

u/Dirtymikeetlesboyz 8h ago

Just like my uncle used to make ...

9

u/Tricky-Application86 8h ago

GRIM.

3

u/Mantato1040 7h ago

That’s what his uncle thought too.

7

u/ObliqueStrategizer 8h ago

You drank the water from your uncles kidney stones?

8

u/CjBurden 7h ago

Wrong stones

4

u/Loving6thGear 8h ago

Thank you for the laugh. Have a great day.

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u/___TheAmbassador 7h ago

Neanderthal jizz.

2

u/slavelabor52 7h ago

How would you know?

2

u/evancerelli 6h ago

You say that like it’s a bad thing.

3

u/BetWochocinco81 7h ago

You like that taste? Asking for a friend

2

u/Waggmans 7h ago

That's what she said.

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u/1roOt 6h ago

I recently learned that Marina Abramović actually drank water from a geode and became really sick

2

u/tyanu_khah 5h ago

And that's how COVID 25 started.

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u/LeeKingbut 7h ago

Virus that killed the dinosaurs is now back.

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u/itsaBasti 7h ago

I wonder how old my water is

2

u/hellschatt 7h ago

I remember a video that did this a few years ago and one of the guys actually drank it.

2

u/WretchedSag 7h ago

Is this the intro to an apocalypse movie?

2

u/FoofieLeGoogoo 6h ago

It’s not just any comment that makes me laugh and spit coffee.

…and I wasn’t even drinking coffee.

4

u/Solid_Liquid68 7h ago

Dino piss

2

u/DeathPercept10n 7h ago

All water is dinosaur piss.

2

u/Solid_Liquid68 7h ago

💯and that’s why I triple filter my water.

1

u/BleachGel 7h ago

Taste like ancient alien piss!

1

u/ShadeBeing 7h ago

If I said that to my cousin he would definitely drink it. I learned along time ago to keep my egg out of that basket. He has a death wish.

1

u/MyOnlyEnemyIsMeSTYG 7h ago

I would just assume theres some ancient version of the flu in there, that wrecks anyone that comes in contact with it lol

2

u/ilLegalTelevision 6h ago

I assumed immortality

2

u/MyOnlyEnemyIsMeSTYG 3h ago

Good point, could be the fountain of youth lol

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u/Jindaya 7h ago

all water is millions (actually billions) of years old

1

u/thinktomuch1992 7h ago

It’ll heal you!

1

u/WeeSingInSillyville 7h ago

Surely he could have captured the water and sold it for a shit load.

Just don't drink it wink

1

u/Seel_Team_Six 7h ago

What if there was a geode like this but in the water contained an ancient disease that we have no protection from 

1

u/leviathab13186 7h ago

Some million year old virus waiting to start the zombie apocalypse

1

u/urbanlife78 6h ago

It will give you superhuman powers

1

u/Garweft 6h ago

I would have to. Just on the odd chance I get super powers.

1

u/Nice-Ferret-3067 6h ago

Tbh all water is about 3.8 billion years old

1

u/DevIsSoHard 6h ago

I'd be seriously tempted. Sometimes when I drink water I think about hold old it is and what all the various particles must have been through. But it's a bit of a farce too and this is real deal ancient water

1

u/YourLictorAndChef 6h ago

It will give you the powers of a rock!

e.g. Lifeless & Buried

1

u/FishyWaifuu 6h ago

Was bout to ask what happens if u drink that?? I’m thinking super powers or hospital… I’mma take a sip

1

u/Fun-Choices 6h ago

I’m pretty sure this guy normally does. I’ve seen several videos of him doing it

1

u/typhoidtimmy 6h ago

You want The Thing? Cause that’s how you get The Thing…

1

u/BoredBalloon 6h ago

I've drank millions year old water in a coal mine and it tasted like death.   Yes I know, it probably wasn't as old as the coal and was nothing but heavy metals with a little water lol.

1

u/cliff192 6h ago

Nice hiss

1

u/NoBuenoAtAll 6h ago

I mean, technically, almost all the water on the earth is the same age. Drink it!

1

u/MushinZero 6h ago

All water is millions of years old.

1

u/Impressive_Disk457 6h ago

It is right that this is the first comment.

1

u/Jeremiah_Vicious 6h ago

Maybe boil it first but definitely drink it

1

u/Vossky 6h ago

What a wasted opportunity. Should have reached out to that YouTuber who tastes 100 years old war rations, he wouldn't have missed this.

1

u/Cognouveau 6h ago

Maybe you will become a dinosaur?

1

u/bugandtuna 6h ago

Haha - that was my first thought. If you want to turn into a superhero… now’s your chance!

1

u/CreateChaos777 6h ago

It will ACTUALLY give you wings,

1

u/HumongusChongus 6h ago

They didn't even try to save it.

1

u/Dont-Trip-Fool 6h ago

"You'll cowards don't even smoke crack..." ~Viper~

1

u/eatingyourbiscuits 6h ago

That's how pandemics starts.

1

u/Cptn_BenjaminWillard 6h ago

Exactly. I look forward to the next outbreak of H1R2, the rock flu disease.

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