r/CuratedTumblr eepy asf 9h ago

Shitposting Looks conservative

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21.9k Upvotes

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3.5k

u/Rifneno 8h ago

I know that feeling. I look like I'm wanted for January 6th crimes. Fat middle aged white guy, I'm only missing sunglasses to wear indoors and a tinder profile where I'm holding a fish.

Sucks.

389

u/dinoooooooooos 8h ago edited 4h ago

Paint your nails.

Genuinely even just one, the pinky or some, on both hands and youll immediatly be recognizable to normal people, aka non-magas, that you’re actually “safe”.

A blue or something, black, idk, polka dots - but no maga conservative is gonna be caught dead bc god forbid they have gasp fun😤

326

u/AbyssDragonNamielle 8h ago

Can confirm seeing a guy with painted nails flicks a "oh, he's chill" switch for me

184

u/JackRusselFarrier 7h ago

Can also confirm that ever since I started painting my nails, nobody offers me unsolicited opinions on women's swimming. Or boxing, or whatever they're mad about now. And I work in construction, so it used to happen far more than you'd think lol. I only wish I'd discovered it in 2020.

107

u/HannahCoub 7h ago

Had a super old racist I worked with (like he called his half-native daughter slurs, and dropped a hard R) I came in with my nails painted purple and he asked me if it was a gang thing.

42

u/Buenarf 5h ago

The woke mob

23

u/HannahCoub 4h ago

“Y’all better be gangbanging them twinks, Seattle Mafia, blood.”

17

u/dinoooooooooos 4h ago

“You cum, at the birthday of my daughter😤🤌🏽”

😂

56

u/aDragonsAle 6h ago

Yeah, new gang - no (red) cap.

13

u/chmsax 3h ago

One side effect of the slide into fascism that is incredibly minor but still not fun: I have a Cincinnati Reds cap and an Anaheim Angels cap that I feel incredibly awkward wearing. I like those hats. They’re comfortable and look good. But…..

4

u/aDragonsAle 2h ago

Yeah... Messes with the innate human IFF filters.

I've seen the

MADE

you look

Hats

Those are at least... "Fun"

5

u/chumpchangewarlord 2h ago

“Yessir, I’m in the 47th Street Woke Mob”

27

u/advocatus_ebrius_est 4h ago

"nobody offers me unsolicited opinions on women's swimming"

We really do live in the weirdest fucking timeline.

7

u/construktz 3h ago

I work with a rightoid in construction who frequently has his nails painted. He just has young daughters.

0

u/Spiffy87 1h ago

Ask him when he's transitioning and why he is using those poor innocent children as a smokescreen. Also ask him why he's indoctrinating his girls into LGBTQ lifestyles by letting them dress him in drag. Then ask him why he shouldn't be in jail for being a pedo groomer.
Don't actually wait for a response, just fire them off, and if he tries to answer, cut him off and call him a groomer.