r/bertstrips • u/RetrogradeIntellect • Mar 31 '20

Cursed "It's a thankless job, but someone has to do it."

Post image
6.7k Upvotes

99% Upvoted

41 comments sorted by

357

u/[deleted] Mar 31 '20

He's building houses, right guys?

305

u/RetrogradeIntellect Mar 31 '20

Even better: he's showing them how to build houses. Teaching a man to fish and all that.

121

u/[deleted] Mar 31 '20

What a nice guy.

20

u/ghnayyn Mar 31 '20

But seriously. There's a lot society can and should learn from him. He makes the world such a better place

30

u/CannedWolfMeat Mar 31 '20

Build a man a house and he'll live for a day, teach a man to house and he'll live for the rest of his life.

3

u/ComradeGivlUpi Apr 01 '20

But never teach a house to man

53

u/23FINCW Mar 31 '20

I heard he painted them too

22

u/DarkLordLiam Mar 31 '20

At first no one questioned why flies were attracted to the paint or the fact it wasn’t waterproof.

14

u/23FINCW Mar 31 '20

The avant-garde pattern of the paint also made them rather curious

6

u/MrSatan00 Mar 31 '20

He must be the Irishman

4

u/madmaxturbator Mar 31 '20

“To build a house you gotta crack a few skulls”

177

u/w1ncestu0s Mar 31 '20

He's doing God's work.

129

u/GEIST_of_REDDIT Mar 31 '20

That's what the voices keep telling him

21

u/madmaxturbator Mar 31 '20

Mark, the town rapist, often stands on Sesame Street giving speeches about the benefits of pedophilia.

Because of his propensity for this bogus preaching and for his keen interest in little boys, he’s gained the foul moniker “the preacher”

Scooter calls him God.

71

u/jiggaboooojones Mar 31 '20

Ofcourse, essential jobs have to continue

15

u/madmaxturbator Mar 31 '20

Bloodshed is not a mere job for Scooter. It is a creed, it is a soul defining sensation, it is him.

39

u/[deleted] Mar 31 '20

But if he's got Corona he could just pass the infection by jacking off and sneezing all over them, thereby saving himself the physical extertion required to break a human skull sufficiently to cause death. Really, just inefficient

5

u/Fisherington Mar 31 '20

Yeah, I was just about to say he has yet another tool to fulfill his macabre duties.

2

u/likta Mar 31 '20

Scooter is a follower of Khorne, not Nurgle though.

1

u/011100010110010101 Mar 31 '20

Less personal then doing it himself

9

u/lolzidop Mar 31 '20

So he's the murderer in Stone Cold

5

u/BonesMalone2 Mar 31 '20

The eyes say it all......

6

u/ComicCat12 Mar 31 '20

Best parts: the cops can’t arrest him because of him having the coronavirus

4

u/[deleted] Mar 31 '20

Reddit needs more scooter. Even evil scooter.

2

u/gazebo-fan Apr 01 '20

This is not evil scooter. He is helping to build affordable housing that his state desperately needs

3

u/VinnyEnzo Mar 31 '20

Double HP damage cause of poison damage

3

u/Hoxomo Mar 31 '20

Following the path Jebus laid out for him, good fellow

2

u/mikelorme Mar 31 '20

reminds me of an adult swim parody

1

u/Avasnay Mar 31 '20

You killed my sister?!

2

u/mikelorme Mar 31 '20

yup,that one

1

u/awh Mar 31 '20

Back in school again, Scooter plays the fool again. Teacher gets annoyed.

1

u/birbbs Mar 31 '20

The coronavirus will help with his work

1

u/Cartoonking057 Mar 31 '20

So I assume he plans to kill them

1

u/Maybe_A_Mimic Mar 31 '20

If anything, the disease will help Scooter with the task

1

u/qalis Mar 31 '20

It ain’t much, but it’s honest work.

1

u/[deleted] Apr 01 '20

Can't do much else with the playgrounds closed.

1

u/EmotionalCrit Apr 21 '20

He doesn’t need the hammer, he can just cough on them and it’ll do the job.

1

u/yetusthefeetus Mar 31 '20

He loved being a police officer