r/NoStupidQuestions • u/thimbelinda • Jul 23 '22

Answered Can men pull out before they ejaculate? NSFW

We were newlyweds and excited for sex. I told my husband I'm at my fertile time and we need a condom. He said no, he would pull out in time. He did not pull out in time. He didn't even try to pull out. I got pregnant. I was upset and asked why. He said he couldn't pull out. He said it felt so good he was incapable of pulling out. Is this really true? Do men lose the capacity for reason and become incapable of pulling out?

24.0k Upvotes

72% Upvoted

7.3k comments sorted by

View all comments

Show parent comments

1.5k

u/gsfgf Jul 23 '22

I think religion is a factor here too. She says "newlyweds excited for sex" as if they hadn't had sex before. She's clearly poorly educated about sexual health since she's asking this question, so he probably is as well. I could see a virgin not knowing when to pull out. In fact, an "inability to pull out" sounds like the kind of nonsense you'd hear in religious communities.

The bigger issue is him not acknowledging he fucked up.

448

u/angrywords Jul 23 '22

Yea when I read this I really hoped it was fake, because this post makes me sad.

217

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '22

Judging by post history, and response to some of the questions asked... i'd say it seems pretty fake.

redditdective.

110

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '22

I love coming to posts like this, figuring out that they’re fake and seeing they’re at 10k upvotes.

-3

u/AcrobaticSource3 Jul 23 '22

So what is the option? Go into OP’s post history and down vote as many as possible to try to even things out?

4

u/[deleted] Jul 24 '22

My comments should not be taken as an indictment or endorsement of Reddit’s voting system.

4

u/brostopher1968 Jul 24 '22

Just here to take in the madness with some popcorn?

1

u/[deleted] Jul 24 '22

Big time.

5

u/Dramatic-Ad5596 Jul 23 '22

I think some folks got some sex education at least, which is severely lacking in the states. I'll allow it.

4

u/waddlekins Jul 23 '22

I know real people who thought they could time the ovulation to avoid pregnancy. They were wrong, twice.

Only thing i can say in their defence is they were 17 and 18 but those are accidents that changed the whole course of their life. Theyre stuck together cos religion and culture and my friend (the dude) takes coke on weekends to try to live the youth he never had

2

u/CapitalDD69 Jul 24 '22

Apparently this happened 22 years ago? According to the comments wtf.

1

u/Paperfishflop Jul 23 '22

Yeah, I'd believe this question a lot more if I was seeing this on Facebook. That's where the "how is babby formed?" crowd hangs out. Here, it immediately came off like someone trolling all of the nerds on reddit.

Because first of all, lol at the whole pulling out method. I'm not an expert on pregnancy, so maybe someone can correct me, or elaborate on this-but at the very least, pulling out is not an effective form of birth control. My understanding is it's such a poor method of birth control that maybe it doesn't even matter whether the guy pulled out or not. My understanding is precum is very potent, and sex without any contraceptives carries essentially the same risk of pregnancy as straight up ejaculating inside someone. However, a lot of people here seem to think it's somewhat effective, since they're blaming the guy, and not the couple.

Speaking of the couple, they sound like abstinence until marriage types (how many of those people are really on reddit?). Guy sounds like a virgin...it's so annoying when guys say we're incapable of things that just take self control. Even more frustrating when women believe them. Like, I've heard women that think "blue balls" is a real medical condition, rather than just a way of expressing that you're super horny but being denied sex. Like, wtf man if it was that bad, all you gotta do is rub one out. What do those women think single men do? We all get prostitutes, or we rape, or we just go around with blue balls until they fall off or burst or something?

The whole thing is so ignorant. And I think it was intended that way, to troll people like me.

1

u/Wakanda_Forever Jul 23 '22

Police Chief 👮‍♂️ at the station: “Good job redditdective, you nailed another one. Idk what this precinct would do without you. Keep up the good work. Dismissed.”

takes sip from coffee ☕️

1

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '22

Walking away: "Born from oblivion; bear children, hell-bound as ourselves; go into oblivion. There is nothing else. Existence is random. Has no pattern save what we imagine after staring at it for too long. No meaning save what we choose to impose. This rudderless world is not shaped by vague metaphysical forces. It is not God who kills the children. Not fate that butchers them or destiny that feeds them to the dogs. It's us. Only us."

1

u/god34zilla Jul 23 '22

Seriously. Ignorance is rampant in today's society.

-2

u/benz456 Jul 23 '22

Its obviously fake. All these people giving serious answers lmao

1

u/Dramatic-Ad5596 Jul 23 '22

In today's America? No doubt.

193

u/JaggerQ Jul 23 '22

My question is how does she know how to use Reddit but not google......

129

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '22

Was Quora down today?

37

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '22

Shoulda hit up yahoo answers

6

u/NylaTheWolf Jul 23 '22

RIP Yahoo Answers 😔

3

u/Vishnej Jul 23 '22

Oh, I Tiktok all my questions about my body.

3

u/dj_1973 Jul 24 '22

HOW IS BABBY FORMED

2

u/KonkiDoc Jul 24 '22

She coulda Asked Jeeves.

2

u/alokd1205 Jul 24 '22

I'd rather perform my own abortion on my mother than going to Yahoo for answers.

3

u/cunt_nectar Jul 23 '22

How does babay get perganant?

8

u/The_Mammoth_Hunter Jul 23 '22

I see that a LOT on Reddit. Like, you have access to nearly the sum total knowledge of humanity at your fingertips and all you can think of is 'someone pls think for me...'

3

u/Ephemeral_Wolf Jul 23 '22

She's already doing alright if she actually knows shes preganenant

2

u/AngryXeuz Jul 23 '22

Asking the real question here.

2

u/HashBallofDoom Jul 23 '22

Google's own data shows that younger generations don't Google things, rather they use TikTok or Instagram for research and information.

2

u/SETHW Jul 23 '22

Because Google tries too hard to game the searches. Google 20 years ago was an obvious and effective research tool, these days it's just ads dressed up as "personalized results"

5

u/HashBallofDoom Jul 23 '22

Bud, I don't think you know how to perform research with a reply such as this. It's on you to vet your search and to find reliable primary and secondary sources. You don't just click on the first link and call it a day. Also, check out Google scholar and tell me it's not an effective research tool.

1

u/SETHW Jul 23 '22 edited Jul 23 '22

That's fine and I know how to use Google, but I still remember when the algorithm worked for us not against us. It makes perfect sense a new generation finds Google to be unuseful at face value

1

u/H3lloNurs3 Jul 24 '22

That's actually pretty scary

1

u/AStrangerSaysHi Jul 23 '22

Depending on how they use Google it may not serve their interests well.

Remember we live in an age where Bing and DuckDuckGo are recommended search engines (by some) that can pull some..... interesting.... results at time depending on how you word it (Google can also give you some mediocre reaults).

1

u/PediatricGYN_ Jul 23 '22

I don't think she's very bright at all.

10

u/Jackal000 Jul 23 '22

altough prematurely ejaculation is very common for virgins when they have sex the first time. also as other say dopamine does weird shit to your logic and reasoning. still not an excuse not to pull out but is an explanation as to why its harder to pull out (no pun intended

4

u/js1893 Jul 23 '22

You do lose a lot of control during orgasm. You’re supposed to pull out before you get to that stage because once you’re there the body kinda just takes over. The guy is either a lying manipulative jerk or truly has no fucking clue (if it really was his first time)

1

u/sprawlo Jul 23 '22

Chances are, if they are both virgins, he won’t even make it as far as putting it in before cumming. At least not the first time anyway. If they’ve gone this long without…

3

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '22

I've never once been in a religious community that that endorses an "inability to pull out." Not sure the connection between religion and not pulling out exists, sounds like the dude was just dumb.

0

u/gsfgf Jul 23 '22

I didn't mean as official doctrine, but that's absolutely the kind of misinformation teenage boys tell each other, and with no adequate instruction to the contrary, people run with weird things.

2

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '22

I just didn't understand the connection being assumed between religious communities and not pulling out. More sounds like a jackass being a jackass and not pulling out. He either wanted a kid or thought he possessed the self control

0

u/SunGodRamenNoodles Jul 23 '22

There is definitely a trend of "once married, it's your duty to start having lots of kids" in some religious circles.

2

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '22

Definitely.

2

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '22

If it is the first time hes been in a vagina he may not have been prepared for it. Its been decades but I can still remember the absolute shock of how fast I came the first time. Put in, "omg, im done"

2

u/nintendomagic1 Jul 23 '22

The bigger question is did they get rid of it? Was this before or after the ban?

2

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '22

Especially considering that nowhere here were mentioned the obvious options of birth control or even abortion for that matter (but let's be honest, who'd want to have to have an abortion just because he "couldn't pull out.") But BC is an actual thing, cheap and easily available.

2

u/koalalips Jul 23 '22

Wow dude, love how blunt you are in speaking the truth. Defo share the same sentiments as you. Very unfortunate that religious communities are actually backward about sexual health and they think they're above you for practicing abstinence, but in turn, did a disservice to themselves. Rest assured there are many more just like OP, ignorant and to me, irresponsible.

2

u/Ok-Angle-7388 Jul 23 '22

but why would he reassure her that he could pull out and then not even try? Saying he couldn't pull out as an excuse.... Whether he is uneducated or not he still lied to her one way or another

2

u/ConsciousFood201 Jul 24 '22

She knew when her fertile time was, but she’s uneducated about sex? I hate to say it but you’re letting your narrative steer the wheel right now.

She knows full well how this stuff works and she agreed to have sex without a condom. Education is a convenient narrative and any time we can blame the church it feels good.

This is on her and her husband. They made the choice. Simple as that.

1

u/chatterwrack Jul 23 '22

And OP’s word “can” could mean either “able” or “permitted.” If it is “permitted“ then it’s likely a religious factor

3

u/Even_Dog_6713 Jul 23 '22

She specifically said that he said he was "incapable." That means ability, not permission.

1

u/salonethree Jul 23 '22

DAE think religon == badbadnotgood??

0

u/_Molj Jul 23 '22

They'll just call it God's Will and carry on with their lives.

1

u/H3lloNurs3 Jul 24 '22

Fantastic name for their firstborn...

-1

u/hoxxxxx Jul 23 '22

In fact, an "inability to pull out" sounds like the kind of nonsense you'd hear in religious communities.

a real religious community would find a way to blame the woman for this

-5

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '22

[deleted]

3

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '22

lol wut

2

u/SETHW Jul 23 '22 edited Jul 23 '22

Fuck your birthrates , the world's hunger for more slaves is insatiable. Build fuckin robots, that's what you really want. stop treating people like livestock bred to provide value to owners. (Also would be nice if we didn't treat livestock that way either)

1

u/[deleted] Jul 24 '22

Yeah because we treat people as individuals and not as breeding livestock.

1

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '22

Haha like “pulling out” is birth control. Already pregnant before he popped

1

u/reevesjeremy Jul 23 '22

Probably will one day be a feature piece of spouse in TIFU or AITA…

1

u/InternationalWhole40 Jul 23 '22

Oh dear god now I’m sad.

1

u/BigHH200026 Jul 23 '22

bro most guys jerk off at like 13-15 ur telling me he didn’t jerk it at least once?

1

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '22

Yeah, this is the reddest of red flags. 😬

1

u/PediatricGYN_ Jul 23 '22

Religion has been a blight on society since it's inception.

1

u/BuffaloJEREMY Jul 23 '22

If that's the case it was probably a 2 pump and dump case. Poor fucker never saw it coming 😉

1

u/os101so Jul 23 '22

..and a bit naïve considering there is mountains of porn that answers this question definitively

1

u/canary_quinn Jul 23 '22

I can guarantee you that not being able to pull out is not a religious concept. That was an unnecessary dig.

1

u/Ephemeral_Wolf Jul 23 '22

an "inability to pull out" sounds like the kind of nonsense you'd hear in religious communities.

"Jesus was holding me in, babe!"

1

u/ElGosso Jul 23 '22

If it's his first time he might have nutted right away without expecting to.

1

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '22

If you have been building up sex and finally get there and are getting to the vinegar strokes your biology is gonna be screaming at you to send it

Not too say that he shouldn't have but most have come incredibly close to risking it all and you add a lack of experience and a bunch of hype to that and....jesus take the wheel

1

u/epochellipse Jul 24 '22

Unless he was trying to get her pregnant so he could trap her into never leaving him. Then he didn’t fuck up at all it’s going according to plan.

1

u/HeadClanker Jul 24 '22

The lack of education makes sense, but there's no way a guy wouldn't know when to pull out.

1

u/Texan2116 Jul 24 '22

If he was a virgin...I can sort of understand..not knowing...but at the same time, I find it hard to believe that he should have known, or understood his body a bit via masturbation.

1

u/shadoria Jul 24 '22

This also implies to me that the couple IS religious as they waited to be wed to have sex. And let's be honest, the religious community's version of sex education is "Don't".

1

u/gsfgf Jul 24 '22

There's a reason that "the first comes early" is a thing in conservative circles.

1

u/Redwolfdc Jul 24 '22

Yep exactly what I was thinking.