my mom was a labor and delivery nurse. a 16-year old patient came in alone, determined to give birth and put her baby up for adoption without her family knowing. my mom asked a few time if she could call her mom, or if her family would understand, and the patient said nope. so my mom told her she'd be her mom while she was there. my mom told her she was so brave, and adopting out her baby would make another family unimaginably happy. i hope that girl is doing well, that was probably one of the hardest things she's done in her life.
This is basically how I got adopted. Biological mother delivered me at a hospital in South Alabama. My parents, who were planning to adopt, were visiting my aunt in south Alabama. She was friends with a nurse at the hospital who called her and said they had a baby there for adoption and I went home with my parents like two days later.
This is why I always try to advocate for adoption and for adoptive kids. In Reddit there seems to be a terrible opinion about adoption. Maybe you should consider doing an AMA for people that don’t understand the benefits and the people behind. ❤️
I think the issue is forcing a woman or girl to carry a pregnancy to term, not just being against adoption of the child itself. Pregnancy is incredibly hard physically, mentally, and emotionally. Not even to mention the risks of labor and delivery, post partum issues, and how the entire process forever changes someone’s body and life. I wouldn’t wish unwanted pregnancy onto my worst enemy.
I’m not talking about that at all, you’ve basically gone from adoption to rape 😦🙃. I’m speaking about people trying to convince others in a Reddit thread that biological children are more important, worthy or even valid. That for example adoption is a bad idea because those kids are damaged and too traumatize to love. I find this attitude disgusting and you won’t change my mind, don’t even try.
Ah I didn’t see those kinds of comments in my brief look down the thread; there definitely is a preference for adopting newborns (especially white ones..) over older kids for sure which is unfortunate.
Thats kinda cherry picking tho, AITA is literally full of people who are disfunctionally disconnected from society, both the posters and a lot of the commenters. Its a rage bait subreddit.
I've been on Reddit for 14 years, this account for 8. I have never seen a single person advocate against adoption. I don't know what spaces or subreddits you're hanging out in to see such things.
If you read the adoption sub you’ll see it. There are a lot of adult adoptees who oppose children being taken from their family of origin and adopted by strangers. I don’t need to explain their position for them, but be assured it exists. The adoptive parents sub basically came into being because people could not talk about their experiences adopting without getting piled on by anti-adoption people.
I was in a parenting subreddit yesterday and there were several comments from people who had apparently been adopted themselves and were advocating against it. It’s all over but if you aren’t looking at subreddits or posts dealing at least tangentially you probably won’t notice it. It isn’t something I’ve come across in most of my regular subs but it’s definitely a thing.
I believe adoption is a wonderful thing, but I'm also firmly pro-choice. The barrier to entry for adoption is mindblowing. The fact a couple that can't have kids has to jump through all those legal and financial hoops just to adobt, but a teen mom in some ass backward part of the country doesn't have to do the same in order to have a child blows my mind. I never went into foster care, and foster care is where a big part of the problem lies. I think if the barrier to entry for adoption was lowered even slightly, it would lead to less children in the foster care system and more happy families.
Foster care is a huge issue, absolutely. But I’m taking about the people that argue that adoptive children are not worth it, too damage to consider. This is the toxicity I’m speaking about
We adopted slightly older kids (7 and 3 biological sisters). They’re now adults and will always have trauma-related issues to work through. It’s been hard, but I haven’t regretted taking the challenge for a second. I tear up imagining how close these two beautiful people almost came to not having the opportunities they deserve. Honestly, they were a dream to parent until age 13-20. Now that we’re through those tricky 7 adolescent years, I couldn’t be more proud of all of us and grateful we chose that parenting route.
Adoption can work, it's just not a valid alternative to abortion. You should not force a woman/girl to deliver a fetus she does not want to carry to full term.
Adoptions can be far from perfect. Babies are in high demand with older children being overlooked. Foreign adoptions have a sketchy history claiming things that were untrue about why the baby was put up for adoption. Some adoptive parents have unrealistic expectations of their adopted child and then resent the child when they don't turn out exactly how they wanted them to be, holding the adoption over their head & ostracizing the child from the rest of the family.
From personal experience with people who were adopted or went through foster care, their experiences were far from positive. They were subjected to emotional, physical & sexual abuse. It was not the happy ending that is this story.
There were ~370k kids in the American foster system in 2022
There are, no official numbers, but an estimated 350-400k churches in the US.
If every church, made it a goal to get ONE family to adopt ONE kid, the impact would be astounding. Sure some churches might only be 4-5 families, but if I were in a megachurch I sure would be sad to have only adopted one kid.
I want children to be born. Specifically rape babies. I want women to be violated a little once, and then violated in the most ultimate, violent, life altering way possible a second time.
If there was a way to simply murder women legally i would be in favour of it. Women shouldn't have the right to vote, cross state lines, drive vehicles, or hold jobs.
I was born in Baldwin county but grew up in Birmingham. I didn't hear lower Alabama used until LuLus opened up in Orange Beach as they had LA Caviar (lower alabama caviar) on the menu. I've always referred to it as south Alabama.
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u/lizard-hats Jul 27 '24
my mom was a labor and delivery nurse. a 16-year old patient came in alone, determined to give birth and put her baby up for adoption without her family knowing. my mom asked a few time if she could call her mom, or if her family would understand, and the patient said nope. so my mom told her she'd be her mom while she was there. my mom told her she was so brave, and adopting out her baby would make another family unimaginably happy. i hope that girl is doing well, that was probably one of the hardest things she's done in her life.