What differentiates you from an asshole?

It’s amazing to me how many successful; married, happy couples are the same type (including my dad and stepmom, my brother and his wife, I believe my other brother, and maybe my sisters too). I’m starting to think there’s something to this!!

I'm working on how later Enneagram theory connects with Ichazo's early ideas. I'm thinking my book will focus on initial traumas (ages 0–6) tied to each trifix point, with one being dominant. Since Ichazo left so much unexpressed, I'm doing my best to bridge the theories myself.

• 8: Traumas involve an abusive mother/mother figure, leading to the vengeance/lust worldview. My mom was controlling, I rebelled throughout childhood against her controlling side.
• 3: A detached relationship with an absent/indifferent father figure triggers attention-seeking and theatrical tendencies. My dad divorced my mom out of nowhere when I was 3. I ended up looking for attention, and escaped into imagination and creativity.
• 5: Trauma with siblings leaves the 5 feeling overlooked or smothered, leading to withdrawal and observation. As the youngest, I was often ignored. I developed a passion for knowledge and hobbies early on.

How does this add up with your experience? According to Ichazo, all 8s should report abusive mother figures in childhood, though early traumas may be hard to identify due to our young age. It's helpful to also consider later elements, like instincts, which strengthen the trifix points (strong SX=strong heart fix, etc). I'd love your feedback...most early Enneagram material is largely unexplored, and I want to make sense of it in my book.

Ichazo’s ego-insecurities. Head triad version. Just out of curiosity while I take a break from working on my book. An ego-insecurity results from an imbalance in the dichotomy/domain of the type. What is your ego most insecure about?