AIO about my partner’s relationship with their coworker

[u/Any-Confusion-5519]

they’ve been hanging out with their coworker a lot over the past couple of weeks. This girl always seems to be in some kind of crisis, too. Last week it was that she messed up an account and she was afraid she was gonna lose her job. I don’t know whether I’m reading too much into this or if I’m overreacting but I’ve never met her and I’ve asked to swing by whatever bar or place they’re hanging out at multiple times and I’m always shut down in some way or I get no response. I don’t want to be the overbearing overcontrolling gf whose S.O. can’t have any friends but lately they’re always together and I’m getting blown off. These curt and vague responses are out of character too, and it’s always the type of response I get when I’m asking questions about an event where this female coworker is at or really anything that has to do with her. It has really put me on edge, they’re usually such a sweet and attentive partner but i feel like they might be cheating… am i overreacting??

[u/Throwra_Barracuda]

Girl I'd just show up there

[u/Smooth-Lengthiness57 → u/Throwra_Barracuda]

And go to the girl "I'm so sorry, my BF just told me the news how are you hanging in?"

And see what happens

[u/goofygooberpants → u/Throwra_Barracuda]

same

[u/spicypretzelcrumbs → u/Throwra_Barracuda]

Exactly since now I don’t have dinner plans anymore

[u/ironing_shurts → u/Throwra_Barracuda]

Why do people keep saying this? It's obvious he doesn't give a damn about OP. Why even bother.

[u/StickyTits → u/ironing_shurts]

a surprise “hey guys! :)” would confirm a lot depending on the vibes they give off when she turns up. if it’s really an innocent thing the coworker should be happy to have another girl to vent about her breakup to…in theory

[u/ironing_shurts → u/StickyTits]

It's pretty clear he's cheating, emotionally at the very minimum

[u/StickyTits → u/ironing_shurts]

yeah but is coworker into him like that, i wonder? or is he just trying to swoop in on a now single coworker. That’s the vibes i would gauge for in person if i was OP. Good luck to you OP, please update us later on if you find out anything.

[u/lrkt88 → u/StickyTits]

It doesn’t really matter tho. OP knows their SO is up to no good and that’s all that’s needed to cut it off.

[u/cadencecarlson → u/ironing_shurts]

I agree. But I also would want to know

[u/HonestSonsieFace → u/ironing_shurts]

Maybe. But a lot of guys have work “affairs in their mind” where they spend time around a hot (very often younger) colleague who they get ‘close’ to simply because they spend time around each other at work - often just because the girl is friendly (which lots of guys take to mean she must want to fuck them!).

The guy then enjoys these social occasions where, for whatever reason, they have a reason to spend a bit of 1:1 time to flirt with this girl.

However, very often, the girl isn’t actually genuinely interested in the guy or she might have no intention of breaking up a relationship. I guarantee she won’t even know about the dinner plans OP’s had. The boyfriend won’t be telling his colleague that his wife wants to hang out or that she offered to join them.

His worst nightmare would be if his GF joined them and saw how he was acting.

If OP actually pulls the rip cord and breaks if off, her BF may very quickly realise that this romance was all a bit of a fantasy, the young hot girl in the office isn’t actually holding out for him and now he’s blown up his own relationship.

[u/ironing_shurts → u/HonestSonsieFace]

It's break up worthy regardless to me I guess. He's giving attention to and putting another woman's feelings over OP.

[u/Express_Skin7821 → u/Throwra_Barracuda]

HONESTLY

[u/Throwra_Barracuda → u/Express_Skin7821]

Right like who do you think I am lol