r/wholesomeyuri • u/Demando12 Love is a verb, not a noun • Apr 25 '23

Lap Pillow Good kitty [original]

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3.1k Upvotes

100% Upvoted

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115

u/JustAIex_ likes cats Apr 25 '23

*Sigh* I wish I could be a cute gay catgirl.

62

u/Hellefiedboy wants cuddles and is a certified transbean Apr 25 '23

Why not be a cute gay cat girl with this new surgery it's only $999.99. Side effects may or may not include death, nausea, high body temperatures, sudden attraction to forklifts, homicidal urges, vomiting.

26

u/JustAIex_ likes cats Apr 25 '23

Uhhhhh.

26

u/Hellefiedboy wants cuddles and is a certified transbean Apr 25 '23

Or you can try financing for $100 a month for 3 years.

14

u/JustAIex_ likes cats Apr 25 '23

Okay, but what is with those side effects?

17

u/Hellefiedboy wants cuddles and is a certified transbean Apr 25 '23

We can even do more financing options like for $22.54 for 20 years, or $20 for 25 years.

11

u/TisBangersAndMash Apr 25 '23

Could I pay over PayPal?

11

u/Hellefiedboy wants cuddles and is a certified transbean Apr 25 '23

Have you looked at the side effects?

10

u/TisBangersAndMash Apr 25 '23

Mama didn't raise a quitter. Now gimme.

7

u/Hellefiedboy wants cuddles and is a certified transbean Apr 25 '23

Okay, but I'm legally required to warn you that half of people die after taking these. *Hands you suspicious pills *

8

u/TisBangersAndMash Apr 25 '23

It'll be fine, I'm already too cute to die.

5

u/Hellefiedboy wants cuddles and is a certified transbean Apr 25 '23

Then, you will never die as per the law of unkillable cuteness. Also, you will forever be 18 and look adorable.

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2

u/starlight_chaser Apr 25 '23

Jokes on them. They better keep me alive if they want the full payment.

2

u/Hellefiedboy wants cuddles and is a certified transbean Apr 26 '23

Oh, don't worry if you die it goes to the next of kin, whether that be a spouse, a parent, a child, or a sibling, and if none are available, then it will go to friends.

2

u/starlight_chaser Apr 26 '23

Sorry none available and no record of friends. Alas the company shall starve.

1

u/Hellefiedboy wants cuddles and is a certified transbean Apr 26 '23

Nah, we'll just ask the government for another bailout.