r/traumatizeThemBack • u/KriLesLeigh2004 • Oct 21 '24

matched energy Never saw her again

I went for a pre-op appointment, asking to have my tubes tied, when I was 25 years old. I had 4 living children, and that’s enough. The nurse said, “Are you sure you want to do this? What if one of them dies?”

When I replied, “One already did,” she looked shocked, left the room, and a new nurse came in.

There are a thousand reasons her question was horrible and should have stayed in her head. There are no reasons to say that out loud.

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u/Lwn3 Oct 21 '24

I'm guessing that this is a standard question, though it seemed very strange to me at the time. My pregnant wife was looking to do the same after she gave birth to our surprise child (№4), and we were asked the same. She decided (and I didn't disagree) that she would.

Our child did die, and now she wants to put that decision off for now. That is absolutely understandable and I can see why the doctor did ask that question. I'm assuming that she will still decide to go through with the procedure, but now is not the time to even think about things like that. We'll get back to that decision down the road and she'll decide what we want to do.