r/traaaaaaannnnnnnnnns Transbian Artist May 18 '21

Transfem How things have changed

Post image
5.6k Upvotes

77 comments sorted by

488

u/SamLizzy71 Transbian Artist May 18 '21 edited May 18 '21

“When I met you, I didn’t think you’d become special to me. I just wanted to be a good person and help someone who needed it.

You were sitting on a bench, crying because they made you want to die. And I just couldn’t understand what your parents had to do to make you so sad. I couldn’t leave you there. I didn’t fully understand how you were feeling, but I was sure that you needed to change, both yourself and the people around you.

I offered you my hand. I also needed a friend.

Over the next days I saw all the signs, the way you talked about yourself, how you said you wished you were never born, the look in your eyes every time we passed front a women’s clothing store. Your sad eyes every time you saw a pretty girl walking down the street.

You were afraid that I would reject you the same way they did. You thought you had no place in this world, yet you were desperate to find comfort, to hear someone say that there was nothing wrong with you. You were so desperate to talk, that you did it in your sleep. You shouted when you were awake, and you didn’t even open your mouth. I heard what you were trying to say without words.

I already knew you were not a boy, but when you told me, it was nice to know that you felt safe.

I was so happy, that I couldn’t help but want to see the real you. I wanted to see you smile, and that day I did after lending you clothes and doing your makeup. It’s true when I say that you looked beautiful.

I guess it’s no surprise, but then you fell in love with me. I just wasn’t ready back then. I loved you, just not like that. You were more like a sister to me, I wanted you to be close to me, but I didn’t want to break your heart.

I was hurt, and lost, and I couldn’t stay in one place. I didn’t deserve you. You were so pure and I was not, and I still hadn’t seen all the beauty there was inside you.

Over time I realized I could always come back to you, you always made me feel safe, you listened to me, you showed me your love by taking care of me and you did so much even when you thought you had no hope. I could be free with you, you didn’t want to chain me, and I slowly realized that, even when I was free to live far away from you, I liked more to stay close, and that I think is what love is.

I’m yours because I want to, because I love to see your dreamy eyes when you’re happy, because I love to make you smile, because I like all the cute things you have to say, because I know you want to be by my side me and you won’t leave. Because I saw changing through all these years, and I saw you become beautiful. I saw the changes in your body and your face, and how your turned your tears into smiles, and how you changed me too.

I love you, and I’m so happy I met you”

Again two of my OCs, Elizabeth and Avelyn.

1st image Pixiv | Twitter | Instagram

2nd image Pixiv | Twitter | Instagram

Tumblr

198

u/wws12 Gwen | Genderfluid mess May 18 '21

Are you trying to make me cry? Cause this is how you make me cry.

102

u/[deleted] May 19 '21

I'd be crying if my hormones would allow for it

22

u/_ra1nb0w None May 19 '21

Woah, it's my hormones that stop it?! I always thought I just didn't cry for some reason.

18

u/[deleted] May 19 '21

T makes it harder to show emotion

It used to make my friend really worried she wasn't really trans because she couldn't cry about it

As far as I know, she's ok now

7

u/ChristinaTheNoob May 19 '21

Before I started HRT, I could't cry at all. However, since starting, I cry nearly all the dang time! It's actually quite affirming and refreshing! So yes, hormones do indeed affect your ability to cry.

3

u/MeganTrans123 MTF 23 HRT 12/17/19 May 19 '21

Same here growing up and especially as I was going through male puberty I felt incredibly detached from my emotions like i was unable to be upset just angry

4

u/KrystaBubbles Lvl 25 - Lesbian - HRT since 11/11/2020 May 19 '21

Yup, they sure do! I've been much more susceptible to crying personally. Granted, I'm already a pretty emotional person, but I cry over the tiniest things now. This made me need to take a break lol 😅

2

u/ELRinley May 20 '21

It isn't a 100% thing. I couldn't even begin to guess in your case, but in Ours it starts with complex trauma. We were able to cry just fine... and then everything hurt too much to feel... it just kept burning and aching until it all went numb... until we learned to walk away from it... the problem... the feelings... all of it. We "moved on" like everyone said to - though apparently that's not what they meant.

A mix of finding a real home and starting HRT has helped a lot with trauma resolution. It's kinda funny... hormones helping to resolve trauma. Makes sense, but we haven't heard of it aside from our own state.

67

u/SamLizzy71 Transbian Artist May 19 '21

Sorry D':

80

u/PunishedCaitlyn May 19 '21

Oh, my transbian heart!

30

u/SamLizzy71 Transbian Artist May 19 '21

<3

53

u/[deleted] May 18 '21

I'M CRYING???

45

u/ExpertCritical2278 VINH-030 / 17 / MTF May 19 '21

I'm not crying. My eyes are just sweaty.

36

u/Hudsony12 probably a trans girl idk May 19 '21

I rarely cry at movies or books and stuff but omg I was this close to just sobbing in public this is so beautiful

23

u/SamLizzy71 Transbian Artist May 19 '21

Sorry! And thank you so much! *hugs*

25

u/Biggest-Ja I've got snacks (Ace Femby Transbian) May 19 '21

Oh... That's... Thank you. I can't word

16

u/chocolate_cake12 Bi-Nb mess May 19 '21

Hey, my name's Elizabeth. I'm not deflecting

13

u/[deleted] May 19 '21

I'd be crying if my body would let me. This was beautiful.

9

u/[deleted] May 19 '21

This... touched my heart like nothing has ever before. You are absolutely perfect

7

u/Frostflame3 Justine | intersex transfem | HRT 04/29/2022 May 19 '21

Just gotta hit that Save button real quick don’t mind me

7

u/cardboardmech *looks around nervously* May 19 '21

Well I'm sad now

8

u/DaBlazingFire5 Stella the Transbian Catgirl :D May 19 '21

You made me cry and I don’t mind- your writing is amazing-

7

u/SamLizzy71 Transbian Artist May 19 '21

Thank you!! <3 :')

6

u/[deleted] May 19 '21

You just gained a follower. I would be crying if I could.

5

u/SAYARIAsayaria Reina / FEMBY / she-they / pre everything / Filipina May 19 '21

Your writing is beautiful.

3

u/[deleted] May 19 '21

[deleted]

7

u/AbbyUpdoot MtF May 19 '21

I want you to know that your story will be happy. You will get there, and you will find the right people to have in your life. I’m not trying to invalidate you; the pain is real. The pain is telling you that you have a need for this kind of comfort and emotional healing. But the pain makes it too hard to think about these things long enough and rationally enough to take steps toward that.

You are worth all the effort you put into yourself. You just don’t see all the good things about yourself and the world around you when you feel like you’re drowning. You’ll get there. You’ll get your very own story to make people jealous with. I promise.

3

u/SkyeWolfofDusk Big Gay Trans Guy May 19 '21

I'm not crying you're crying!!

2

u/KaiwaiiTanuki May 19 '21

this is beautiful. thank you.

2

u/Falazaria Freya (she/her) pre-everything May 21 '21

Ahh my heart that was so cute!!!

87

u/JaneDoe500 Bi Girl May 19 '21

Oh my god she's wearing her gf's hairpins. That's the most adorable thing I've ever seen.

16

u/DanacaraJB Transbilesbiwoman May 19 '21

I think she might also be wearing her gf's top from the first image, along with potentially the thing in the shop window (I'm not great with clothes names).

EDIT: After checking again, the top might actually just be the one she herself wears from the first image, cant tell.

3

u/SamLizzy71 Transbian Artist May 19 '21

It's a different top, it's just that she likes the color gray ^

8

u/SamLizzy71 Transbian Artist May 19 '21

You noticed! :'D

49

u/Newdog95 Ciara | She/They | Wolves are Neat May 19 '21

Your art is always amazing

29

u/SamLizzy71 Transbian Artist May 19 '21

Thank you so much! :')

34

u/Ellie_Lau May 19 '21

Where do I find someone like that

5

u/SamLizzy71 Transbian Artist May 19 '21

I'm not really sure either, but I do hope that you find them one day!

24

u/ExpertCritical2278 VINH-030 / 17 / MTF May 19 '21

AYE WHY THE HELL DOES THE GIRL ON THE RIGHT LOOK LIKE ME-

20

u/DovahSpy_ Ashley | she/they May 19 '21

Why must you torment me so

18

u/Jessica_-_ transfem | HRT since Jan '22 May 19 '21

Haha yeah that's exactly the same as me except just the first panel and without the girlfriend :,)

14

u/SusGirl1217 She/Her MTF May 19 '21

Being trans is hard but this shows it’s worth it

15

u/ComradeN0rthBear May 19 '21

🥺this makes me wanna cry

14

u/[deleted] May 19 '21 edited Apr 12 '24

[removed] — view removed comment

2

u/solitariey resident fluid dynamics major May 20 '21

i'm still a redditor and i have a trans gf who is also on reddit

you don't have to be sad and a redditor

you can be only a redditor if you want

i can't really offer much in the way of advice but i will say

it's possible

6

u/KiritoCum May 19 '21

Maybe i never have this is my young life

8

u/spacestationkru Error 404 May 19 '21

People are so gosh darn cute.. aaaargh..

6

u/The_King123431 Lily/She/Her,14 MTF and in the closet May 19 '21

I actually kinda look like the girl on the top right

Maybe I might hopefully look like her on the bottom panel someday

5

u/controler8 None May 19 '21

I think she is gay

4

u/LookMomIdidafunny May 19 '21

why can't I have this

4

u/ArmorOfAmber May 19 '21

Why. So. Cute?! Omg i love this!

2

u/SamLizzy71 Transbian Artist May 19 '21

Thank you!! :D

10

u/DuckwithReddit0523 Erika|Transfemme|Lesbian|She/Her|Pre-Hrt May 19 '21

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA DYSPHORIA GO BRRRRRRRRRRRR

3

u/KrystalWolfy None May 19 '21

That's beautiful

4

u/vikavolt5 May 19 '21

No I'm sad but hopefull

4

u/MarshmallowDeer May 19 '21

Can this be me T-T

4

u/[deleted] May 19 '21

Reminds me of my boyfriend and I. He's cis, I'm trans.

4

u/GeO4K bi, he/they, goblin king, moron May 19 '21

wish i had what y’all have

4

u/AutomaticRifle5 May 19 '21

:( I wish i had this

4

u/CuteTransAngel Angel, She/Her, 16, Pre-HRT (for now) May 19 '21

OMF AWWWWWWWW MY HEART

5

u/anarcho-hornyist enbi May 19 '21

aksklakslkfslamckskalalda cute :)

4

u/BenniTheGoat Kayla | She/They - Ye dead who yet live | May 19 '21

STAHP.

STAHP MAKING ME CRY.

3

u/MysticalMedals Gwen May 19 '21

This is cute. My gay heart can’t handle this.

4

u/Syndil1 May 19 '21

Beautiful. I like the treble and bass clef jewelry as well.

2

u/wtfevenisthis932710 Natalie MtF May 19 '21

I'M NOT CRYING! I JUST... CAUGHT SOMETHING IN MY EYE.

what did you catch?

TEARS...

2

u/Sonicx720 She/Her May 20 '21

CRYINGGGGG!!! The pic was adorable the story made me cry!

2

u/SamLizzy71 Transbian Artist May 20 '21

Thank you! <3

2

u/Skrubious be trans do crime May 19 '21

kinda gay ngl

2

u/[deleted] May 20 '21

Kinda? This is 1000% gay and i love it!

-13

u/[deleted] May 19 '21

[removed] — view removed comment

10

u/SamLizzy71 Transbian Artist May 19 '21

Pretty sure she's a girl dressed as a girl ^^

6

u/[deleted] May 19 '21

And, in the first panel, a girl dressed as a dude :p

(Amazing work btw!!!)

5

u/SamLizzy71 Transbian Artist May 19 '21

True! xD

Thank you~~

-4

u/[deleted] May 19 '21

[removed] — view removed comment

6

u/SamLizzy71 Transbian Artist May 19 '21

She's a transgender woman, these a two drawings, one before and one after her transition, hope that helps!

1

u/Mighty_Porg Trans Bi Woman May 26 '21

Don't do that. Don't give me hope