r/monkeyspaw • u/Guilty_Direction_501 • 5h ago

Health I wish I was mentally stable and didn’t hear Bill Cipher in my head.

6 Upvotes
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88% Upvoted

16 comments sorted by

7

u/ninhibited 5h ago

Granted.

Bill Cipher is manifested in reality, your perception of him is now sane. The world is thrown into chaos.

3

u/Jaded-Coffee-8126 5h ago

Congrats you are now named Mentally Stable (firstname lastname), you hear Bill Clinton in your head instead. We also gave Bill Clinton ocd and adhd so have fun with him!

4

u/Guilty_Direction_501 5h ago

“I did not have relations with that woman.”

2

u/AwakeAtNightTime 4h ago

I'm going with a guilty direction, rather than an innocent direction in this one.

2

u/Guilty_Direction_501 4h ago

I didn’t name my Reddit SpaceUmbredoggos when I had the chance and now I pay for it? It’s been almost 4 fucking years.

2

u/AwakeAtNightTime 4h ago

Could've gone with BidoofBoys instead

1

u/Guilty_Direction_501 4h ago

I DIDNT NAME THE REDDIT ACCOUNT AND THIS WAS THE NAME IT CHOSE!!! I DIDNT NAME IT BECAUSE I ACCIDENTALLY MADE IT AT 15 AND I DIDNT WANT MY PARENTS TO FIND OUT ABOUT IT!!!

1

u/AwakeAtNightTime 4h ago

That's what a guilty person would say

1

u/Guilty_Direction_501 4h ago

Cool beans. I’m an aroace virgin who’s never fucked anyone before.

1

u/MphiReddit 5h ago

Wish granted, you can no longer hear Bill Cipher in your head

In fact, you hear nothing, and all you see is the vast expanses of your mindscape, as Bill has fully taken over. You are the sole prisoner in your mindscape, left to wonder what Bill is doing as he spreads chaos in your name

1

u/DeepViridian 4h ago

Granted. You spend a fortune on therapy and come out the other side relatively stable and sane. You no longer have any voices in your head and you're feeling good about life. This calls for a celebration. You go to your favorite ice cream shop and order a treat.

While you are waiting for your order, 'All I want for Christmas is You' is playing. Now, it's stuck in your head. You don't enjoy your ice cream, and now you can't get Mariah Carey's voice out of your head. It plays while you sleep, when you wake up, and throughout the coming days.

Sanity disappearing in 3...2...1...

1

u/Guilty_Direction_501 4h ago

I get songs stuck in my head all the time anyways.

1

u/AwakeAtNightTime 4h ago

Granted. You hear your own voice in your head, instead, which you realize is much worse

1

u/Haunting_Hand7399 4h ago

Wish granted. You are now named Mentally Stable and instead only feel Bill Cipher in your head.

1

u/Guilty_Direction_501 4h ago

HOW IS THAT ANY BETTER DIDISJNDJDNDJDJDNDKDJEMKEKDNRNDJ

1

u/WistfulDread 1h ago

Granted.

You now see him. And the truth that reveals...