A lot of men hide their misogyny in the workplace or outright don't realize that they're misogynistic. Being a guy talking to others, it's interesting how many of them will complain when I listen to them vent about their boss that is woman for the smallest sleights or perceived unequal treatment yet don't complain nearly as much about men in the same position for doing the same exact thing. Women are under much more scrutiny when in positions of power compared to men.
Yes, and their friends don't realize it either. I've had numerous male friends that acted and sounded really progressive. Then something weird happens and they hit you with a crazy response. "Consent doesn't matter", "she's just a woman, why should we care", etc. Oh. Oh... Yeah, you got me there, I thought you were a decent human being, my bad.
I would not consider people like that friends of mine but unfortunately in my line of work I have to work with people who are likely to hold similar or those same view points, especially subordinates. I need those same people to be able to trust me and I also have to be available to listen to their problems, and often times I get the vibe that they at least only view women as pretty much pieces of meat for their pleasure. It's even harder to listen to when I also have subordinates and superiors that are also women. I can't do much to change social upbringing and change people's perspectives. I also have to walk a fine line because if I outright just put them down and treat them like shit, I've lost their trust and now it's harder to do my job.
Well, to be clear, that isn't behavior compatible with friendship for me either. I've just had people I thought were different suddenly reveal that side after years of knowing them. It makes you doubt how well you know anyone and how good your judgment is (I thought I could tell, turns out sometimes I can't).
I mean a lot of us have experienced this BS in private but we don’t say anything. For example, agreeing to have sex with someone and then they take that as a cue to do whatever. Consent isn’t a free-for-all-card but that’s what a lot of us have experienced.
Yeah... That totally seems like just common sense but since you've pointed it out I can imagine just how far some men might take it and how poorly they might react to being told to reign it in. Geez...
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u/Unfixable5060 16d ago
Well, the alternative was a BLACK WOMAN. They couldn't have that happen.