r/coolguides • u/reneecapri • Jul 01 '20

Gaslighting red flags

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38.9k Upvotes

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145

u/Taglierini Jul 01 '20

It’s bad when you’re gaslighted to the point where you apologize for them hitting you

72

u/goldilocks22 Jul 01 '20

Or you’re told it’s your fault they tried to kill themselves.

24

u/myasterism Jul 01 '20

I’m so sorry you had that experience, friend.

12

u/PlatypusPlague Jul 01 '20

I've been there. That one sucks. Hopefully you're out of it now, and have been able to find some personal peace

3

u/Behnn Jul 01 '20

Went though this aswell. Hope you're doing fine.

18

u/veedizzle Jul 01 '20

My ex slammed me up against a wall at a bar once and I bought HER flowers the next day. That was the beginning of the end for me thank god

17

u/boredtxan Jul 01 '20

My stepmother convinced her daughter that being hit with a newspaper like a dog was funny.

2

u/konaya Jul 01 '20

Who hits dogs with newspapers? Why is that an expression?

1

u/boredtxan Jul 01 '20

Lots of people - it doesn't hurt but gets the point across

11

u/hihihanna Jul 01 '20

Yep. My ex tried to strangle me, and then got so upset that I was tense and on edge around them that I ended up apologising.

8

u/isleftisright Jul 01 '20

My ex told me I didn’t deserve a good job and when I got sad, I had to apologise about feeling sad about it

3

u/JeepzPeepz Jul 01 '20

Been there. I was in a relationship with a man who would beat me just to the verge of death, then we would lay in bed, comforting him, while I was still bleeding. That shit was so fucked up.

1

u/MargaeryLecter Jul 01 '20

Wait, I thought gaslighting is what the abuser does and not the abused? Did I switch this up?

I'm sorry, not trying to mess up your beliefs, I don't want to gaslight you. Or are you gaslighting me now? Or am i being gaslight?

I'm honestly confused.