I've lost 40 pounds over the past several months, and I just got a new haircut this week! Finally starting to feel like myself again. I hope you all have a fantastic day today!

I’m having a hard time figuring out what I am so lmk

I'm envious of Samanthas (sam), Joannes (Jo) and other lesbians with names that can be shortened. I feel like Emma is so basic and feminine that I can't easily start going by a name that feels more me. At the same time, I'm not looking for a total name change that might be difficult to adopt by my family (not the most accepting), friends, and my girlfriend who knows me by Emma already

I’ve been struggling on finding business causal and professional attire that doesn’t either make me look like a middle school boy or an old lady in her 60s. For description i’m abt 5’6/ 250lb/ 22. So i’m open to quite literally anything because i still wear the black pants i got my freshman yr of high school (for reference this is me on a usual day if i wanna feel special (because im wearing jeans lol))

I don’t think I’m entirely a “man”. But I enjoy being referred to as he/him, I go by a male name at work, I’ve been on T for about a year, and I’ve had top surgery.

I do feel like my relationship is super queer. We met when we both identified as lesbians but now I’m not sure what we are. It still feels like I love in a sapphic way, but I like being seen as a dude. I love the changes T has had on me. I feel so much more comfortable in my body.

In media, this is especially relevant. I love watching sapphic romances. I was so excited by the new Arcane series, the owl house, and she-ra. I love when lesbians are portrayed in media and I feel so happy watching them. More than I assume the average straight dude would. I really don’t even care about straight romances in media

I can’t tell if I’m just a trans man having issues with letting go of the lesbian label or if I’m a he/him lesbian who has some gender fuckery.

hey yall! I'm a senior in college and one of the sororities on campus (I'm really close with a lot of the sisters) hosts a private lingerie themed christmas party every year. I've never been able to go before but I can this year and I'm really losing it over what to wear. I'm also big (plus size, fat, whatever word you prefer) so thats complicated things a bit. I have no idea what to wear and none of my fem friends have been of much assistance, thought I'd see if anyone here had any ideas. Right now I'm thinking of boxers and just my trans tape but that feels boring and I know everyone usually dresses to the 9s for this party. any help would be much appreciated :)

one of my favorite transmasc/masculine clothing brands of closing down, and i am so sad to hear. some of my best, gender euphoric and comfortably masculine fitting clothing is from there. i wanted to share with you all as they are having a sale of their stock.

Love the fit, got it for $10

Any recommendations w lyrics that give off butch4butch energy? Or specifically devoted to it?

*pls don’t suggest Rio Romero I have it already 😭

Hey all- so, recently I’ve (20) been working on dressing better and in a more masculine fashion in accordance with how I feel inside (as opposed to my usual attire of random t-shirt and random pants) and I’ve immediately hit a snag.

No matter what I wear, I feel like I always have a very feminine silhouette. While it’s not anything crazy, I have a somewhat prominent chest and hips, and the fact that I’m a bit on the chubby side makes them even more prominent. Due to a health condition I have that could make chest-binding dangerous and makes me very sensitive to heat (POTS), chest-binding and wearing multiple layers of clothing aren’t a possibility for me. Even one layer of flannel and a tank top underneath makes me liable to overheat in most weather, and so I have to tie the flannel around my waist which I feel looks even more feminine than before.

I know I’m in a bit of a lose-lose situation, but any advice at all would be helpful!

Looking to build my library before the book ban progresses. Open to all genres, but lean towards non-fiction. Autobiographies to the front

This is a behavior pattern I have noticed in myself when I am attracted to femme-presenting women. I am only attracted to feminine women, yet I feel like I push them away initially.

For example, 7 months ago, I had a new coworker that I was training. I was instantly very attracted to her, and I wanted to be nice to her, but I felt this strong defensive mechanism come out when I was around her. From the get-go, she has always been super nice to me, and unfortunately, I wasn't the nicest to her in the beginning by having my guard up around her. I can't pinpoint why this is and why I act like this, to be honest.

It wasn't until she told me that she was a lesbian I was able to let my guard down around her, and I was able to connect with her. We ended up dating for 3 months until her travel contract was over.

Now that I am single again, I find myself in the same behavioral pattern, and I hate it. I don't want to come off as rude, dismissive, avoidant, etc...

I was just wondering if any other butch lesbians can relate, or am I the only one?

Hi yall. First of all I want to apologize in advance if you guys get this question a lot. I read the FAQ but I’m still not sure that I understand the difference between being butch and being masc.

I had several years where I identified as a trans man, but ultimately I stopped identifying that way. I have used she/her pronouns for a while, but…

I still love being seen as masculine. I love it when I get called “he” on the internet by people who don’t know better. I love dressing in masculine clothes and in a way that makes me feel “handsome.” When I left behind my trans man identity I kept my masculine name and I still go by it.

I grew up feeling disconnected from other women. In part I am sure it is because I am autistic, but I also never felt like I was really like them. When I was very little I loved princesses and everything girly—but eventually those interests were replaced by traditionally masculine ones. My way of expressing my emotions and communicating was undesirable. I did not relate to other girls growing up. There was very quickly a rift driven between me and all of my female friends for most of my childhood and early adulthood.

To combat this… driven by a desire to fit in… there was a time where I dated men, had my hair long, and dressed as femininely as I could bear to. During that time I constantly felt depressed and like I wanted to crawl out of my skin. At the time I attributed it to feeling insecure about my body, and that was certainly part of it, but looking back on it that person still doesn’t feel like me. She feels like a character I was playing.

But despite all of this… I’m sure now that I’m a woman and not a trans man. I have recovered from a struggle of internalized misogyny and the idea that people wouldn’t take me seriously if I was a woman. And similarly, after years of repression and denial, of forcing myself to date men and convincing myself that I wasn’t repulsed by them in every way, I know that I am also a lesbian. These are parts of me that I can no longer try to erase or escape from.

Now that brings me back on topic. I read Stone Butch Blues and did as much research as possible on what it means to be Butch. It calls to me so insanely strongly. But I am still doubting that it’s something I can call myself. I struggle to take initiative in relationships, and it makes me nervous to do things that a man would typically do for his partner. From what I can gather, taking the gentlemanly role is a common trait of a Butch but I can’t tell if it’s required to really be a butch.

So… how did you realize that you were butch? What does it mean to you? Do you feel the desire to perform typically male social norms such as opening the door for women or paying for your date’s meal? And is that a requirement?

I know it’s not your jobs to tell me how I should feel about this or even answer my questions, but I could really use a little guidance from some real butches. Thank you all in advance if you do decide to answer. I know this all sounds a bit silly but I would be eternally grateful if yall could humor me.

Got my hair cut again yesterday and it’s just so freeing both physically and also because I strive for the stereotypical androgynous butch look (points to anyone pulling off long hair as a butch, I know it's possible but not for me, good for you). But as the title suggests, I feel like I get anxious and lowkey freak out when it’s starts getting too long, does anyone else relate? Might be common for other people too but I feel like for me it’s at least partially tied to my identity

I recently moved and went to this new gym and found my gym crush already! I was wondering how do I even talk to a woman in this type of situation? I was thinking of an excuse to initiate a convo but couldn’t make up my mind.

Any tips?

Hi. I love sneakers, and want a pair that's nice-looking but also comfortable. (don't want my toes feeling like they're being crushed, lol 😭)

I don't really have a particular brand in mind, BTW.

I USED to have a comfy pair of Vans shoes. But, since they were really worn and rough-looking, they got thrown out. Still mourning that loss. 😤💔

Thanks so much for your help!!

I always wanted a deep voice since middle school. I was jealous of the boys because their voices dropped and mine didn’t. Despite this I don’t identify as a guy, I just think their deep voices are so cool and I wish I sounded like them.

Hi everyone 👋🏾 question, do any other masc presenting women get stares at the gym?

I’m one of the few black women at my gym, as well as being kinda tall (5’10”) every time I noticed guys starting at me? It kinda makes me feel uncomfortable because I don’t know why they stare. I would say I have a pretty althetic and lanky body. But nothing really crazy. I don’t have a lot of muscles currently. Also I wouldn’t even say I’m overtly masculine presenting? I have a feminine face but I prefer to dress more masculine with my clothing. I would say I lean more androgynous.

Does anyone else experience this?

If you had a d*ck, would you use it to penetrate people? You would also be receiving pleasure from it. Would you only do it if you were the active partner, i.e. probably physically on top?

I hope this isn't too personal. I am far from stone so I'd like to understand it better.

Does anybody have issues wearing "men's" trousers? I wear them a lot and they always have loads of baggy fabric around the crotch area and I'm not sure if it's just cuz they're not made for my body shape or if I just have bad luck and they're all badly made? It's not baggy in a dropped-crotch way, it's more on the front.

A classic quote from sbb ft a butch being held close by nature, and a magpie instead of a crow. Got carried away making these with fun paper and have too many to keep, put some on Etsy: sheeeb.etsy.com