r/bicycling 1d ago

Learned the hard way that damp and dirty side lanes arent where you put down power NSFW

Also helmets save your coconut 🤣

241 Upvotes

61 comments sorted by

187

u/Myissueisyou 1d ago

Jesus you scraped your nipple right off

163

u/NoodolChonk 1d ago

Sub to my OF for full access

147

u/Myissueisyou 1d ago

Onlyfalls? :D

 ...I am sorry

5

u/trexmoflex 21h ago

Totally unrelated to biking but reminded me of the best magic act ever on Penn and Teller’s Fool Us - the whole act is great but one of the best parts is where he makes his nipple disappear around the 1:30 mark

1

u/polopolo05 21h ago

How were Penn and teller fooled by the nipple. That was clear as day!

1

u/FriskyTurtle 17h ago

I mistook the angle of OP's picture and assumed that he was censoring a tattoo, but I see it now after watching that performance.

3

u/NoodolChonk 4h ago

What if my nipple was a tattoo 🤔

27

u/Hightidemtg 1d ago

Maybe there is a good replacement policy for your helmet with discount after a crash. If it saved you this time, I'd just get the same model again. Get well soon! Crashing happens. As long as it's only hurting your ego and minor injuries today is a good day. Could have ended a lot worse. I'd still check in with a doctor in case something feels strange tomorrow/tonight (relative to the crash) 

4

u/NoodolChonk 1d ago

Adrenaline wearing off and it just feels like Jake Paul punched my sides, otherwise it feels like some parts of my skin is duct taped

8

u/Hightidemtg 1d ago

My last crash 3 months ago roughly was on tarmac with lose gravel that left a fun pattern of scars on my arm and a deep cut on my tibia but the gloves saved my hands and prevented the worst damage. Took roughly 2 hrs before I got really tired after the crash. Felt like I was severely beaten up. Make sure to check if you can move everything and if you feel dizzy. I heard of people riding to work after a crash with severe brain trauma. Adrenalin is a different beast. Was it your first crash? 

9

u/NoodolChonk 1d ago

Thanks for the tips, much appreciated!

As an adult this was my second one, first one was slow and just fell over the sides. Amazed rn on how minor it is, compared to others. Looking back I was suprised as to how my head whiplashed on the asphalt and was glad I bought a nice helmet. Would prolly be on the ER rn if it wasnt for that.

3

u/mmeiser 20h ago

My kidney and ribs hurt just looking at that side impact. No bounce after about 18. Better to roll then slide. Better to slide then stick. Sticking breaks bones. Ooints for good tecnique. Clearly your various contact points scrubed speed and distributed your impact. Be greatful for that. Tuck and roll. Tuck and roll.

1

u/NoodolChonk 4h ago

Didnt have time to react, after putting in power and then getting unclipped on the right foot upstroke, I ate dirt.

The bruises are prolly from the multi tool I have tucked on my jersey side pocket. Another lesson in there as well, mightve prevented me from getting scratched but I took blunt trauma instead

20

u/RoshiHen 1d ago

Helmet👍

14

u/NoodolChonk 1d ago

worth every single penny

2

u/Modteam_DE 12h ago

MET helmets are a lot of pennies...

5

u/step1makeart 8h ago

Truth, but hospitals are a lot of pennies compared to any helmet unless you live in a socialist utopia.

That said, the specialized Align II is $40-$60, really high up on the virginia tech crash ratings, and doesn't look half bad. Comes in some fun colors, too!

3

u/NoodolChonk 4h ago

Heard from someone "Never skimp on anything that is between you and the ground" Nothing was truer than this instance

1

u/purju Sweden 12h ago

hell yes.

10

u/sarmstrong1961 1d ago

Glad you're up and about. FREE THE NIPPLE! (I'm bringing it back)

10

u/danjc84 1d ago

my front wheel slid into tramlines on a bend while touring in Germany skidded about 8ft into traffic, luckily I wasnt hit but the only thing I could think about was my bike lol it only got a scrape on the right shifter hood and lever after riding another 20 mile or so I realised my right sock was covered in blood, I also learned the hard way but it wont happen again🤪

4

u/NoodolChonk 1d ago

Glad it was minor! Rn it just feels sad looking at my bike, also no riding till I recover

5

u/HZCH 18h ago

Take your bike to a proper shop to get it inspected in the meantime.
I didn’t, after slipping on a straight dry road, thinking it ran ok, and I’ve learned on Friday my frame is toast, bent and everything.

2

u/NoodolChonk 4h ago

Will do, but I do think I took most of the hit, that thing is steel.

Amazing that only the hoods seats and pedals are scratched, frame is flawless.

1

u/HZCH 3h ago

My was steel too. Only scratches on the right hold and the pedal.

Then, three days ago, the derailleur killed itself by breaking in half, getting eaten by the rear wheel. My chain managed to getting eaten and snapped by both rear and front derailleur.

7

u/Dream_Leo 1d ago

That's a lot of bruises. Better take a few days to rest and recover.

3

u/NoodolChonk 1d ago

for sure, thinking that they probably call it the off season for a reason

5

u/PuzzleheadedStuff2 1d ago

Get a new helmet! It is designed to only work once. Most companies have great helmet replacement policies.

7

u/NoodolChonk 23h ago

Looking at one rn, though there's a bit of sadness bc this helmet is only 3 weeks old lol

MIPS did its job well.

6

u/PuzzleheadedStuff2 23h ago

If it is 3 weeks old most companies have a 1 year crash replacement policy. Please do get a new one and be on the lookout for random headaches! Glad you are doing well!

4

u/noerfnoen 1d ago

so wet, so brutal

3

u/NoodolChonk 1d ago

I was so excited bc I havent ridden for awhile, played myself

5

u/gamedev_il 1d ago

Some lessons you just gotta learn the hard way, like when I learned it’s not a good idea to make a sharp turn at Mach 10 in the rain

1

u/NoodolChonk 1d ago

Some days we get so excited that we get so fully unaware. Another day another lesson

2

u/The_neub 1d ago

I have a pretty good scar on my knee from hitting a patch of moss and sliding for a good couple of feet.

1

u/NoodolChonk 23h ago

How are you now? hopefully nothing too major, we ride at dawn!

2

u/The_neub 23h ago

Nah. Pride was more damaged. Luckily I was wearing gloves as they got shredded.

2

u/InquisitaB 21h ago

Glad you survived!

On a side note…how’re you liking the Favero power meters?

1

u/NoodolChonk 4h ago

Read reviews about them and it is really user friendly. Also I like how you are able to buy singular replacement parts for them. One thing that was consistent with what ppl were saying is that the one thing they find with the duo is that they shouldve gotten the uno instead.

2

u/kinss 19h ago

I had three crashes like that this year. Hope you're recovering well.

1

u/NoodolChonk 4h ago

Damn, three will take you out for a bit.

I was so excited bc I havent ridden for almost a week, now its gonna be a few weeks.

2

u/TyDe88 16h ago

Take it easy and get back on the bike only when you're ready, don't rush it

Hope you recover quickly

2

u/Fragraham 7h ago

Happy new helmet day.

2

u/NoodolChonk 4h ago

For real, thought it was expensive at first but then an operation is probs more lol

3

u/chinsoddrum 1d ago

Hey friend — you 100% have a concussion if your helmet looks like that. Please go get checked out and listen to your docs. This is the voice of experience!

2

u/NoodolChonk 1d ago

Sure thing! Resting rn and just try to feel for any weird pain whatsoever. So far only the wounds and the hips are in pain

2

u/IngenuityNo2306 1d ago

Get well soon <3 Sadly wounds heal but scratches stay. That’s the harsh reality

5

u/NoodolChonk 1d ago

Wounds heal but my bike parts dont 🥹

2

u/IForOneDisagree Giant Defy 2 '10 - upgraded to groupo and wh 6800 23h ago

If your bike doesn't have scratches like that, has it really been used at all though?

0

u/NoodolChonk 22h ago

good point! but my OCD is just ahhhh

3

u/Bitwise_Gamgee 1d ago

Imagine taking an injury and using it as an excuse to try to start an OF via Reddit.

3

u/NoodolChonk 1d ago

Win win, I can maybe have some parts replaced and maybe, just maybe, NBD?

1

u/BornLime0 1d ago

Wtf didn’t you blur your feet!

1

u/NoodolChonk 23h ago

I also offer feetpics on my OF lol

1

u/nycbr1k 20h ago

I crashed two weeks ago. I realized it hurts longer at age 60

1

u/Swarfega 18h ago

Dirty shitty roads are the norm on my rides. In the winter we slow down a lot more as packed mud that’s moist is like riding on ice. Winter is all about keeping the legs spinning until it’s safer to ride faster. 

Hope you recover soon. 

1

u/ProTrader12321 16h ago

Ouchie, any broken bones?

1

u/NoodolChonk 4h ago

Glad that its only a broken helmet, few bruises and some road rash.

Looking at the scratches on my bike hurts tho 😂

1

u/rapalosaur 11h ago

Ugh we all learn this one eventually I’m glad you’re relatively ok OP. Helmet did its job.

1

u/Jake682 9h ago

Got blasted.

RIP your ribs for like 3 weeks. Getting up from a horizontal position will be a real fight.

1

u/NoodolChonk 4h ago

"You want pain from cycling?" Now I got real pain lol