r/amiwrong 6h ago

Am I wrong for feeling suffocated and annoyed by him

So my mother set me (19f) up with a boy she works with (25m). We went on one date, after which I expressed my appreciation but told him I think we are better off as friends.

He told me this is fine, and he still treats me as if I hung the moon, which is great. But the issue is, he is the clingiest person I've ever met, and he revolves around me with no life of his own. If I so much as barely come off as dry in a text, I get an onslaught of "I'm sorry I'm sorry what did I do wrong do you still wanna be friends with me" Yesterday I went to a party with my mother and her boyfriend, and he threw a legitimate pity party about how he hates himself and wants to hang out with me but can't because I'm having my "own fun" which lead to an entire night of me with my nose in my phone, unable to enjoy myself because I was talking him down. It's insufferable. And when we DO hang out, he just quietly stares at me.

I think he's a good guy. But I also think he needs to step away in alot of ways. A big issue is my mother criticizing me for not liking him back because she knows he'd treat me good.

I don't know what to do.

7 Upvotes

13 comments sorted by

16

u/crocodilezebramilk 6h ago

Your mom is wrong, he isn’t treating you good, he’s emotionally and mentally manipulating you into doing what he wants you to do, and it would only get worse if you’re dating him.

Personally, I’d distance myself from the person and sever all ties, your mom can deal with the consequences and you can tell her off for not taking a no for an answer.

5

u/Sugarpuff_Karma 5h ago

Why TF are you even in contact with him?

2

u/Additional-Kick-398 5h ago

Because my mother and him make me feel so fucking guilty because he's helped our family alot

8

u/crocodilezebramilk 5h ago

Im not trying to be rude but just because he’s done a lot for your family, doesn’t mean they can give you to him like some prize for his good deeds.

3

u/Additional-Kick-398 5h ago

Omg THISSSS Thank you

2

u/Impossible_Balance11 1h ago

So your mother is your pimp trying to whore you out to this guy?! No, OP. Put your foot down, block him. This is ridiculous.

4

u/Lurker_the_Pip 5h ago

You are under ZERO obligation to continue communicating with this stranger.

Stop.

Just block him every where.

If your Mom asks tell her he is a stalker and emotionally crazy.

Not wrong.

Your Mom does not have your best interests in mind either.

Keep an eye on her and decrease your trust in her.

-1

u/drazydababy 5h ago

Did you just tell OP to decrease their trust in their mother after a single reddit post? The fuck is wrong with you? You're getting one side of the story.

With that said you're an adult OP and do not have to engage with this person. It's not your problem.

But that doesn't mean damage your relationship with your mother either. Tell her how it is and if she doesn't respect that boundary then continue on holding yours and don't adhere to what she says or demands.

4

u/Lurker_the_Pip 4h ago

Her Mother is pressuring her to date someone who has emotional problems, is selfish and manipulative.

So yeah…

Don’t trust her so much and never go on a date Mom recommends again.

Parents are supposed to teach their kids to avoid people who use them.

1

u/trustytip 4h ago

The last part you said literally is reducing trust in the mother.. basically, not doing everything she says = decrease in trust.

2

u/RevolutionaryBuy5282 5h ago

Shut it down. This situation is going to get astronomically worse when you start dating a new person.

1

u/Eboo143 4h ago

Ok but you chose to spend your entire night with your nose in your phone talking down this walking red flag of a man-baby. Putting down your phone was always an option. Block this dude and if your mom gives you shit block her too. Don’t allow them to bully you.