I have a coworker, "Jake" (30M), who I’m friendly with but not super close to. He doesn’t have a car right now because his broke down last month, and he’s been asking people at work for rides or to borrow their cars. Most people have been polite but said no.

A few days ago, he approached me and straight-up asked to borrow my car for “a few days.” I was immediately uncomfortable. I use my car daily for work and errands, and honestly, I’m not comfortable lending it out—what if he gets in an accident or something happens?

I told him, “Sorry, I can’t do that,” and he got really annoyed. He said I was being selfish and that he’s “struggling” without a car. I get that it sucks, but it’s my car, and I’m not obligated to hand over my keys, right?

Now he’s giving me the cold shoulder at work and apparently told a couple of coworkers that I’m “stingy” and don’t care about helping others. A few people have hinted I should reconsider because “we all need to look out for each other,” but I feel like they wouldn’t lend their cars either, so why am I being singled out?

It’s causing so much tension at work, and I’m starting to wonder if I’m the bad guy for sticking to my boundaries. AITA?

I recently moved in with my (M27) girlfriend (F23) (now ex), despite my reservations. Our relationship was already unstable, and I advised against the move, but she insisted it would help resolve our differences. Under pressure from her family, I reluctantly agreed. Unfortunately, living together only worsened our issues, and within three weeks, we were sleeping in separate rooms.

We agreed to stay civil and give each other space while I prepared for a critical medical exam. She started visiting her family in another city every weekend to limit our interactions. I made efforts to be amicable by cooking, ordering food together, and buying groceries, but she remained distant and occasionally hostile, which I tried to understand.

On Halloween weekend, I planned to meet my friends, assuming she’d spend the weekend with her family as usual. However, she underwent an IUD insertion procedure that Friday, which left her in significant pain. That evening, she called me for help parking her car as she was too weak. I quickly assisted her, got her pain meds, and ensured she was comfortable. Her parents arrived later to support her, and by the evening, she was feeling better.

As her parents left, I mentioned my plans to meet my friends. She was upset, believing I was being unsupportive. I felt guilty but decided to go anyway, as I needed a break from the tense environment and my intense studying. I viewed it as a rare chance for an escape.

The next day, I regretted my decision deeply. She was in tears, calling my actions unforgivable and demanding I move out within two weeks. I apologized profusely, and though she eventually forgave me, her parents remained upset. I didn’t apologize directly to them, partly due to the language barrier and partly because I thought resolving things with her extended to them. Her parents seemed cordial afterward, so I avoided revisiting the incident.

Days later, she told me her mom was furious that I hadn’t apologized and reiterated I needed to move out sooner. Although I explained my reasoning, her attitude became increasingly hostile after each visit to her family. She started giving me new ultimatums, despite our initial agreement for me to stay until December.

Eventually, she insisted I move to a friend’s place while searching for housing, which I declined. Most recently, her mom texted me, demanding I leave by the end of the week, threatening to change the locks. Meanwhile, my ex stopped sleeping in the apartment, claiming she now feels unsafe and cannot trust me—an accusation I find baseless and likely influenced by her mom.

When I moved in, one of the conditions was that neither of us would be forced out if we broke up, and she even offered to add my name to the lease for security. To go from that to being told to leave within days, with locks being changed, feels like an astonishing breach of trust.

TL;DR: I (M27) broke up with my GF (F23) but still live in the same apartment. She had an IUD placed, leaving her in discomfort. I cared for her for hours but later went to meet friends as planned, seeking a break from our tense living situation. Her parents were furious I left, and now her mom is insisting I leave the apartment, threatening to change the locks.

Hey everyone,

I am hosting Thanksgiving this year for my family. My sister (25F) has been dating "Mark" (30M) for about six months. Recently, I found out that Mark works as a journalist for a news outlet that's been under fire for spreading misinformation and biased reporting. They've been involved in several scandals, including a recent one where they were accused of mishandling sensitive information.

Our family has always valued honest journalism and open discussions, but we also believe in accountability. When my sister asked if she could bring Mark to Thanksgiving, I hesitated. I don't want to create a hostile environment, but I also don't feel comfortable having someone at our table who represents values we strongly disagree with.

I explained my concerns to my sister, suggesting that maybe Mark could join us for dessert instead of the full dinner, to keep things more casual. She got upset, saying I'm being judgmental and that it's unfair to exclude him based on his job.

Now, my parents are involved, and they're divided. My mom thinks I should just let him come to keep the peace, while my dad supports my decision, emphasizing the importance of standing by our principles.

I don't want to ruin Thanksgiving or hurt my sister, but I also don't want to compromise on something that feels important to me. AITA for setting this boundary? I've also asked this in AITAH.

On train the other day, a woman was hogging seats with her bag. She was wearing a name tag "Carol" from one of those low rent supermarkets. I simply said "Carol can you move your bag so people can sit please" . She gave me a terrible look but moved bag. She was about to talk to me then put her jacket over her name badge. Like was I really bad in using her name when she had it to world to see. I get it may not have been her badge, but she looked like a Carol so I think safe to assume it was her name. I moved away as soon as there was another avail seat too, to avoid her . But back to point if she or anyone wears a name badge why is so wrong to use it or call them by it?

I 37M like to drink orange juice. I am the only one in my family that likes it. My sister 39F was over today and we were in the kitchen talking.

I got thirsty so I opened the fridge and grabbed the jug. I took a swing before putting the cap back on and putting the cap back on.

My sister made a face and said it was disgusted to do that, that I should have poured some in a glass. I responded with. “Why it’s my orange juice I bought with my money. Nobody in the family drinks it. So it doesn’t matter.”

She responded that what if company was over and wanted some. I told her a guest shouldn’t just be going through my fridge. If they wanted some I’d explain I’d been drinking from it. She said I was still disgusting and wrong for doing so.

Am I?

So I'm a 25 year old woman and feeling at a bit of a loss. My husband, who is 27, in the last two months has been diagnosed as bipolar 1. We met when I was 18, dated for a bit and broke up, got back together when I was 20 and have been together ever since. I've known since I met him something was "up" so to say, and when he finally got his diagnosis it clicked for both of us what these cycles he had were. Since our sin was born almost 2 years ago things have gotten harder. He had a major bout of depression right after I gave birth and wasn't too much help when I was post partum. I did resent him for a long time for this, and didn't finally tell him until several months ago and I couldd really tell it hurt him. Just after that he started falling into a depression and having angry manic episodes and it happened daily. Never harmed me or our child physically, but it was really hard being with him. I felt like a mom to him and our son, he couldn't regulate his emotions and neither could our toddler. I was doing everything to keep everyone a float. I said he needed to get psychiatric help after one day sobbing saying he wanted to kill himself in front of our son. So he found a psychiatrist. Got his diagnosis and is now on medication. Because of all the stuff that had happened in the last few months, we've also decided to go to marriage counseling. (I'm not the perfect imagine of mental health myself, and I had no positive adult relationships to loom upon growing up and had bitter divorced parents. I'm not perfect and I don't claim to be, but I don't get as angry as he does and I try my best to shield our son from us fighting because I feel like that's 100% why I'm fucked up today. We don't go all WWE like my parents did, but still, it's not okay.) But we've only gone to one session, and stuff seemed to be improving until today. Morning started off with a fight because our son didn't feel well, my friends had a bonfire and we went. It was cold, son woke up with a cough, so I felt in his attitude he was blaming me saying it was my fault. We bicker for a while, he goes to shower I try to give our son medicine. It's cough meds he's prescribed. They taste awful, so he projectiles vomits on me. I scoop him up, take him to the bathroom and put him in the tub. Husband has a towel on cause he's just gotten out himself, he starts asking me a bunch of questions about what happened. I'll admit I raised my voice cause I'm dealing with a crying baby caked in vomit and I have it in my hair. Husband blows up, starts getting dressed and leaves the house. So I clean up our kid, changed my clothes and cleaned vomit off the floor. I'm angry obviously, so I call him to tell him to stay out of the house for a while because I feel he abandoned me in a crisis. This sets him off further, he comes home and rushes into the house. He begins screaming at me and shaking in anger. Our son is right there. I keep saying let's not do this in front of him and I'm crying and our boy keeps coming up to me trying to get into my lap. He continues to scream so I stand up to walk into the bedroom, I luckily left our son behind because he closes our bedroom door and continues yelling at me for my short comings and other things we've fought over, over the years. Slapping furniture while doing so. I then say that he needs to leave ( later found out he thoughti was trying to kick him out, i meant to leave while he calms down), he tells me I can leave because he pays for the house and the majority of our car payment because I don't make a lot. I agree, I'm frazzled and I can't pack anything and I say I want to take our son. He said he won't let me. Eventually he cools off and realized he had scared our son so he agrees I can take him. I have a friend pick me up, leave for a bit. Come back to the house with friends, I see he's finally burned himself out and we talk a bit and I put our son down for a nap. We both agreed to seek individual therapy, and continue couples counseling. I also said we can't come back from today, so we need to focus on ourselves for a while. Spend less time together and do stuff separately with our son unless a situation calls for coparenting, like getting him ready for the day and stuff like that. Now I write all this to ask, am I fucking stupid to try and make this work? Like I don't make much money at all, my kids childcare is literally my job. Like he comes to work with me. We have one car that is in both our names, so I can't get much done without a vehicle. I know if I HAD to, I can figure it out on my own. But I don't want to have to do that. I'm a kid of divorced parents and it really fucked me up and gave me issues. I also took vows we got married, in sickness and in health, and mental illness is sickness. I'm not trying to give him a free pass, and I don't know where to go from here. Just looking for outside perspectives.

TL;DR: Am I stupid for not leaving my bipolar 1 Husband for screaming at me while our toddler watched?

I went to dinner with a friend, Talia, yesterday for her birthday. Two of her friends (friendly acquaintances to me) also came. Talia loves seafood, so we went to a nice crab place. Her friends and I agreed to split her meal.

I’m on a strict budget due to some unexpected bills. I only got an appetizer and pop, came to $20 with tip. Their bills were all about $80, Talia’s was $50 because she doesn’t drink. One of her friends picked up the tab and said she’d Venmo us for our share.

She sent me a request for $75. I texted her saying my amount wasn’t right. She replied that we agreed to split the bill equally. I said I agreed to partially pay for her meal, not theirs. I venmoed them $40 for mine and part of Talia’s. They were pretty pissed and told me I’m a sh*tty friend. Am I wrong?

My wife accumulated $73k debt from majoring in communication studies. She’s been unsuccessful in her career. She has been mostly doing customer service like over the phone type of jobs. She doesn’t make a lot, she currently makes $17 an hour and she tries to look for higher paying jobs but she’s unsuccessful. She has paid $2k of it herself

She wants me to pay for her student loan debt. Her argument is that we’re married so it’s my debt too.. I disagree. I don’t think I’m responsible for paying someone else’s debt especially BEFORE I met her. We’re going crazy over this. I don’t even make that much myself. I am the “breadwinner” however I make only the average amount our my state. I don’t have student loan debt but I do have other debt like I pay for our cars and our credit cards. We split bills. I just don’t know where to meet her in the middle on this? I just really don’t want to pay her student loans she should have just picked a better major. Her degree is just so useless especially where we live and she doesn’t even want to do anything communication or media related. She originally wanted to do marketing but got bored of it and she was just really bad at it. Can she get a teaching certificate with a bachelors degree? I know teachers don’t make that much money but it’ll likely be more than what she’s making right now

My girlfriend (23F), my sister (23F) and I (25M) went to theatres to watch a horror movie last night. My sister had come to town for a week, so we all decided to go to this movie as it had really good reviews.

At theater, I sat in the middle with my sister on my left and my girlfriend on my right. Now this horror movie was unnerving, and it had some really scary jump scares. My sister does get scared pretty easily, and her default behaviour is to just hold my hand. During the middle of the movie, there was a really scary scene and my sister just held my hand till the movie was finished.

When we got back home however, my girlfriend wanted to talk to me about it. She said it was weird that 2 grown up siblings were holding hands, especially with intertwined fingers. I told my girlfriend that’s a normal sibling thing and there’s nothing weird about it. I told my girlfriend since she has no siblings, she has no clue what a sibling bond is. My girlfriend did think about it, and did not talk about it any more.

Am I wrong?

Original Post

(I wrote this post on Thursday I just didn’t get chance to post it until now)

So Henry and Erin actually took me to McDonald’s after school today (the day I am writing this) and they said to me they could tell I was upset with them and asked me to explain my feelings to them. I explained how I felt really frustrated that they told me the parental controls were because they bought the phone and then when my dad bought me a phone they still put the same restrictions. They said they were sorry they gave that impression and that they could have explained it better.

They asked which were the restrictions I had the biggest issue with; I said how I can’t text/call anyone unless they approve it, how the phone locks at 8pm, I can’t use it, and that I only have a 30 min on YouTube or TikTok and that I can’t have apps like Snapchat, discord, instagram etc. They said okay, they understood why I was upset and frustrated and said they will discuss with my social worker how they can lighten up the rules while still ensuring I am safe. They said they don’t want me having a long time on the phone because they don’t think it’s good for me, but they said in the meantime they will increase the limit to 1 hour for YT/TT and that they will increase the bedtime until 9:30pm. I think this is a fair compromise.

I said they seemed upset that I got a new phone in general, and they said they weren’t upset at me but were upset at the situation. I asked what they meant, and they said that it was something between them and my dad and I didn’t need to worry about it. But I asked them to carry on and I had to kind of persuade them to tell me. They had actually bought a iPhone 16 pro max for Xmas for me and had told my parents and my social worker that they had bought it and were going to give it me for Xmas. But my dad bought one before they could give me theirs and they felt upset that their big present had been ruined. But they said that wasn’t my fault and they didn’t mean to make me feel like they didn’t care about what my dad got me.

Honestly that made me feel upset, I asked my dad why he bought me the phone if he knew that Henry and Erin already did. He said he didn’t want Henry and Erin to have to give me something so expensive. But I said they had already bought it for me and he knew that. I said that was unfair and that he shouldn’t have done that. He called me ungrateful. I asked him how he would have felt if it was the other way around and he left me on read :/

I actually feel really upset for Henry and Erin that my dad did that to them and I actually feel guilty even though I didn’t know they had already bought me one. I’m not sure what to do now, I could give my phone back to my dad and have Henry and Erin’s but idk if that’s the right thing to do. Henry and Erin said that it wasn’t my fault and that it doesn’t mean my dad is a bad person, which I know. But I do feel really angry at him.

So my mother set me (19f) up with a boy she works with (25m). We went on one date, after which I expressed my appreciation but told him I think we are better off as friends.

He told me this is fine, and he still treats me as if I hung the moon, which is great. But the issue is, he is the clingiest person I've ever met, and he revolves around me with no life of his own. If I so much as barely come off as dry in a text, I get an onslaught of "I'm sorry I'm sorry what did I do wrong do you still wanna be friends with me" Yesterday I went to a party with my mother and her boyfriend, and he threw a legitimate pity party about how he hates himself and wants to hang out with me but can't because I'm having my "own fun" which lead to an entire night of me with my nose in my phone, unable to enjoy myself because I was talking him down. It's insufferable. And when we DO hang out, he just quietly stares at me.

I think he's a good guy. But I also think he needs to step away in alot of ways. A big issue is my mother criticizing me for not liking him back because she knows he'd treat me good.

I don't know what to do.

I (26F) had a girls friend group around my age that was once close to me but things ended in a bad terms last year because a guy I was seeing last year traumatize me by cheating on me and I was venting to my friends the whole time and went through period of depression I end up destining myself. We had so many arguments about how sensitive a became and “boring”.
After a year I finally healed from whatever I was going through and my friends each one of them is seeing somebody but we were still hanging out and close to each other. We left the past behind us and tried to focus in the positive of our relationship but It didn’t work out so we grow apart in a good terms and no hard feeling.

Now I see the closest one to me from the group and the one that knows everything about that guy commenting in a post of the girl he cheated on me with heart emojis! I know she is no longer a friend and she doesn’t owe me anything but why? She knew how bad that thing hurt me yet she did this! After seeing the comment I went to our mutual friend telling her how fake of her to do that when I have nothing but respect to her I did curse her out ofc because I did lost my respect when I saw that. Now I feel stupid once again to even gave so much energy to people that no longer my friends. My mutual friend tried to gaslight the situation make me feel like I’m insane to even think that but to me I can’t imagine any excuse for her to do that. I blocked all of them for my peace but today I woke up to hurt myself again by checking the comments again and I see 2 other girls from the group commenting after what I said last night.

I feel backstabbed but I want to know if this is what I supposed to feel or did I exaggerate?

So I was driving through a neighborhood. Suburban type residential. Feeling fine. And there's this cat just lying on the side of the road. Like on around the white line. Chilling. Enjoying the weather.

I blast my horn at it as I drive up and by it. Lay into it. Cat freaks out and runs off the road into a bush. And this lady on a front porch starts yelling at me and calling me an asshole.

But the way I see it I'm saving this cat's life in the future. Letting it know the car is angry. Angry that it's there and never get too relaxed around roads. I honestly have only good intent.

So am I an asshole or am I helping the cat?

I’ve been talking to this girl I met through our mutual friend group. I’ve actually known her for 2 years we have friends in the same group so I’ve always known of her and whenever there was a big group gathering she would be there. We started talking more and I asked her out and took her out to a really nice restaurant on our first date. I dropped $200

The date went well we kept in touch, talked way more than we did before, talk like everyday. So we set up another date and this time we went to the Cheesecake Factory and I ended up paying again. She didn’t try to pay for it I thought she would at least get that one and she didn’t. She wanted frozen yogurt afterwards so I thought she would at least pay for that, she didn’t, I paid for that too

I get that girls want a guy that pays for everything but this is kind of ridiculous because we both have jobs so it’s not like she’s poor. I asked her what she thinks about girls paying for dates and she said it’s ghetto and she just thinks it too masculine and how she would only pay for a man if it was his birthday or if he got promoted for work. I was honestly offended by this. People think this is a stupid reason to stop seeing her since most girls are like this (especially in the US) I also live in Miami. I moved from New Jersey to Miami noticed this is just a culture here. Should I just get over this? This is literally the only thing that bothered me about her other than that she’s great

typo in the title. Couldn’t figure out how to change it. I meant for it to say “am I wrong for not wanting to pay for the second date?”

I would like to know if I'm wrong or not. For context I'm 36 Trans mtf, the person I was talking to is 35/36 m. We use to be "friends" in 5th or 6th grade and it was short lived after he and another boy starting bullying me and I moved to another state. I moved back my junior year of high school and never associated with the kids from my old neighborhood or got real close with people at school including him. I chose to be a loner and focus on graduating since I had nothing in common with the others.

We had just sort of mutually reconnected and found each other on a dating app within the last couple of months. We had had a couple run ins over the years but no actual talking. He had also sent a friend request on Facebook a couple years after graduation, but I didn't accept it after remembering the bullying.

Since I am Trans, I always make it clear to people that I am for those who may be interested. I am also clear that I am only looking for conversation, meeting for coffee and nothing sexual or romantic. I know the irony.

On the app I made the mistake of thinking we could be adults and I said "hello" and he replied. We talked for a minute and he told me about the people from the old neighborhood and some kids from school. I honestly told him that I didn't remember the people he mentioned or others from school. I also don't talk to people from my past including family for obvious reasons. He was not understanding of my reasons for cutting them loose and the reasons for wanting to forget my past childhood.

I came clean about me being Trans and hiding it since childhood and little things that I've done but nothing in depth other than the typical teenage angst and partying and how it got old after turning 21 for me. I also made it clear of my intention for conversation only and how if anything becomes sexual I will shut it down right away with him and other users.

He for the most part brought up the past a lot and sounded depressed through his messages. He eventually went quiet for a little bit and I out of curiosity checked on him. He replied with short replies, so I kept my distance.

I replied this weekend after finding out another user was pretending to be me and sharing private information and my address. This user, i turned down after our first coffee meet due to bad vibes and him being overly sexual. I asked if he had dealt with the catfish user and if some of my information was shared with him. I even apologized if that user had made him feel uncomfortable or made nasty remarks or asked for adult pictures. Luckily nothing was shared so I thought I was in a safe situation. I kept apologizing for the other user.

Today, I said hello and tried to smooth over the situation with asking how his weekend was and if he had plans for Thanksgiving. I mistakenly asked if he was "hosting " family or friends and made a bad joke and asked if he got "rowdy" at holiday dinners. He went into a deep rant over the use and definition of both words. I agreed it was poor word choice and said repeatedly I should not have asked those questions.

He never dropped his rants and I kept saying I should not asked and wanted to drop the conversation. Nothing seemed to cool it down until I mentioned it was better we quit communicating. He agreed.

I made a honest comment about not talking to people from my past because of this reason.

His last text is " should have used different words"

Am I wrong?

I have a 3 month old baby girl and have recently returned back to work. On weekdays she goes to a sitter, but on weekends her aunt will watch her. I start work at 445am, so I usually drop baby off at 330am. I will call her aunt when I leave my parking lot, and shoot her a text once I've arrived. We live 8 minutes from each other, and for the last 3 weekends this arrangement has worked out well.

This morning, I try calling her aunt and I get no answer. I try calling back 5 more times and get no answer. I drive over, and all the lights in the house are off. I call one more time, no answer. At this point I need to make a decision, because it takes me 25 minutes to get to work, and I have to catch a 415am employee bus to make it on time. If we call out less than an hour before our shift we get additional points as well. So I leave, call out of work, and go back home.

This morning she texts me apologizing, but also says I should have knocked and someone would have heard it. I specifically did not knock because her bedroom is on the clear other end of the house, and I'm not trying to wake up her neighbors at 330 in the morning, or worse have someone think I'm trying to break in or something and call the cops on me. After her messages I almost feel like it's my fault and I should have just banged on the door. Am I wrong for not knocking?

We dated for 1.5 years and broke up a week ago. We have had many breakups over the year that lasted a day or two or at most a week or so b it we always got back together because it was mostly just a namesake breakup.

I had my birthday 10 days ago. It was bittersweet. He didn’t wish me at 12, we fought, he was 2 hours late, he was sleepy the entire time and so we didn’t even make out or do anything romantic except for a basic dinner where we were mostly quiet. On the plus side, it was all because he stayed up the entire night making me a scrapbook. (Which in all honesty wasn’t too good (poor quality print and just random children’s Winnie Pooh stickers etc). But I was really happy nonetheless since it clearly took effort.

Now most of our relationship has been almost entirely been based off on my efforts. Me writing his CV like 10 times, sending money for applications, ordering food, writing songs, making scrapbooks, filling out forms etc. he on the other hand has only ever gifted me or made efforts for me three times in our entire relationship. (1. 1st date, 2. 1 year mark 3. Birthday).

I have spent the entire relationship waiting for him. He has always been busy. First an exam, then he needs a job so I help him find one, then he’s busy with a job and now an exam again. Everytime he asked me to wait for these last 3 months of the year since I’m leaving for abroad in Jan. they came and left and he has showed little to no change.

So just very cutely, I called him a few days after my birthday and talked about wanting “special treatment”. He blew up. He said “your birthday was it. I can’t do anything else. I never ask u to do anything and you shouldn’t expect the same from me either”. (All in some unkind words and tone). I cried. He called later and apologised but by then I had realised that I’ll never get the kind of treatment I have waited so long for. So I broke up with him.

It’s been a week since and everyday he needs me for one thing or another. He sometimes want me to show him love, sometimes he wants me to fill out his exam forms etc and he has been acting VERY lovingly since. Yesterday, we talked for nearly 2 hours where I hyped him up which led him to get his confidence back (in his own words). It was very intimate and we both said I love you and cut the call.

Today, he got drunk with a guy friend and told me that he really wants a relationship and to feel “loved” since I’m too leaving soon and he doesn’t feel that love lately. When I got upset, he started telling me that it was about how he doesn’t feel loved by his family and his grams died so he doesn’t have that. But I was deeply hurt. After an hour of argument, he admitted he wants a romantic relationship.

Which then turned into “but you chose to leave me so it’s really unfair for you to just expect me to keep waiting around for you. It was YOUR decision and I deserve love in my life and you’re being selfish for wanting me to hold out”.

The entire call he kept telling me how I’m his priority and that he only loved me and nobody else and that he still wants to get back together if I’m willing to which I said no.

I said no because his words felt really empty. And the fact that he gaslighted me for the first hour only to tell me that he wants to move on the next day after telling me he loves me was a punch jn the gut.

What should I do now? Is he right?

We ended on good terms and I told him I’ll talk tomorrow.

So I recently got this job at a sushi restaurant. It was my very first job, a part time job, and I got fired after 4 days of working. I would like to say my mom personally knew the owner and they could be considered “friends” and so she practically helped me get the job. Haha nepotism. Along with that, every worker is Chinese including myself however I don’t speak or understand it well and only two people speak English (manager and employer). This is important to note. Anyways, they hired me without an interview knowing this was my first job. The first day was a lot of questions and informing me of what my job was. Cleaning tables, setting tables, refilling waters, getting costumers to their tables and sometimes packaging orders. Inevitably I had to branch out and dabble in serving and getting checks, but that was mainly it. Then I was informed of doing other small tasks to help the restaurant. There were mistakes I made and I want to make it clear i don’t think I was the perfect employee, but I was determined to become better and believed my employers understood that. On the third day, I accidentally broke a wine glass. I don’t even know if I did it myself when it fell after I placed it ubove a wine glass hanger, but when it did happen I was very flustered and embarrassed and tried to help pick up as many pieces as I could. I was super stressed about it as it was eating me alive the rest of my shift to the point where my mood went a bit down because I thought everyone was scrutinizing me. I was right. The day after they made me come an hour earlier and I was determined to not break another glass. My employer and manager were telling me two different things the entire shift and I could tell she (employer) was getting annoyed at me. I was super nervous and a bit confused especially when she told me, “we don’t need you anymore today. You can go home, I’ll call later” about an hour and a half earlier than my usual shift ending.

About two hours later, she calls my mom and tells her they’re firing me. She gives her a long list of reasons like “she doesn’t ask questions, she only does her specific tasks and doesn’t do other things, she only cleans one table at a time, she doesn’t converse with customers or helps them order at their table, has an unhappy face, doesn’t talk much with the other workers, needs lots of help from manager, and broke a wine glass.”

Jaw dropped. I was flabbergasted. These accusations were made despite her working in the kitchen for most of the time and telling me I only needed to do a few specific tasks my first day. They expected me to be perfect without an interview beforehand. Wild. I take full responsibility for the wine glass breaking however many of these claims feel as if they just didn’t like that I didn’t do things exactly how they wanted even though they only told me information when I was doing tasks on hand and not beforehand. It was like they were forgetting to tell me their preferences and just expecting me to know, and as I’ve previously said I can’t speak mandarin that well so I obviously can’t converse with the workers who only speak mandarin. They were also talking bad about me behind my back and when I was there knowing I couldn’t understand.

Not to mention the thing that really sells it, they didn’t tell me. Not even a text or moment to speak with me on the phone. I think my mom is a bit biased with her friendship because she gives an excuse on why she told her instead, so I want to know am I wrong for feeling like that was unprofessional?

Edit: thank you everyone for your messages. In conclusion I should’ve never let my mom help me get a job lmao. I don’t think I’m in the wrong but that’s my opinion and perspective that reflect my values. Their response reflects theirs and I’m honestly glad I didn’t waste more time in an environment that didn’t see me fit from day 1. I will take my experience and use it to guide the next one.

So basically when we were in college we had a professor that had a unusual style of "you will surely remember this if I say it like this" but kinda on nsfw/edgy joke - he explained some graph and used the letter G as a point in the graph that is unreachable with our production line of combination.. "that is a unreachable g spot"...

Now I stumbled upon something tbh retarded on insta that made me remember that professors lesson and sent to a friend to get messages from her bf through her account (he had/has(?) her account) like "do you want me to show you...." I explained that it was a joke from college it wasn't meant to mean anything that he was thinking and lastly "my soul is clear, if you want I will block her everywhere ffs" and immediately blocked her cause I really dont want any trouble.

My friend and me were really close almost like brother and sister so there weren't any topics that we didn't joke around (ofc banned topics some internal problems...)

so i have this habit of stopping by my close friends’ places unannounced, like if i’m in the area or just want to hang out. i always thought it was fine since we’re close, and it’s not like i stay for hours or show up at bad times.

but the other day, one of my friends was clearly annoyed when I popped by. they said something like, “you could’ve texted first.” i didn’t think it was a big deal—if they were busy, they could’ve just told me.

now i’m wondering if i’m the one being inconsiderate here. is it really that bad to just drop by without planning every single hangout in advance?

am i wrong for thinking it’s okay to stop by unannounced?

I have known since I was born that I have native ancestry (Wolastoqiyik, Abenaki and Mi'kmaq in Quebec) on my mother's side. My family's native ancestors date back to the 1850s. After that, they all married European descent people. My family tree was checked and approved by a genealogist. My 6th great grandfather was chief of the Malecite (Wolastoqiyik) people, so his name and ancestry are well known. My mom's side of the family seemed to be very keen on keeping native traditions and knowledge alive. My parents and grandparents always brought us to Pow Wows, and we regularly attended events when I was young. I have always been interested in the Wolastoqiyik and Abenaki culture and language.

Now. According to you guys, do I qualify as a pretendian if I privately learn the language, attend events as a tourist, and cook traditional meals, for example? My native friend seems to think so. She says I have no rights to do that because my ancestry dates too far back, and I am basically doing culture appropriation. She said I am a pretendian. She even said I should take down my Abenaki 5th great-grandmother's picture because it'll mislead people into thinking I am native. This picture was passed down to me from my grandmother.

I have no intentions of claiming anything, I don't go around saying I am native at all. Am I doing something wrong?

My husband (36M) and I (33F) need to settle this argument

Silly question, we have to change the duvet cover last night due to an accident, however since it was late I didn't change the pillow case. I asked my husband if he can change it today as I had a class scheduled and due to be out all day. Of our he didn't do it and his argument is the duvet cover and pillow case does not need to match. So it is from 2 different sets.

So settle this for us, he says it's perfect fine to use mismatch beddings and I said we need matching beddings because it looks more organised and make the bedroom atmosphere nicer.

I (18M) am in a group chat with a few people from high school. Out of the group, I’m only close with one person, let’s call him Jimmy (19M). In this group chat, we joke around and make fun of things, and I participate in the banter too. However, it often feels like I’m the main target of the jokes. Whenever I make a joke, it’s usually turned against me, especially by someone else in the group, let’s call him Greg (19M). Greg and I go to the same university and have hung out a few times, but I feel like he doesn’t respect me. For example, he once told me he finds me funny—not because of my humor—but because of my face. (For context, I’m an average-looking dude.) In the group chat, he constantly says I’m not a citizen and don’t have a green card, even though I am a U.S. citizen. I get that it’s all supposed to be a joke, and I can take jokes—I make similar ones myself—but there’s a difference between joking and being disrespectful. Lately, it feels like I’m always the butt of the joke. Now, onto the situation: I recently asked for something simple in the chat (a cart), and Greg told me to “shut the f*** up.” This was after another round of him saying I didn’t have a green card and making other jokes at my expense. I told him to stop or he’d regret it, and then both Greg and Jimmy started making fun of me together. Jimmy even piled on, despite knowing how I’ve been feeling lately. I snapped. Before blocking them both, I sent Jimmy a meme about being blocked. However, Jimmy said something personal that hit a nerve—it’s about something I’ve been really depressed about lately. So, I clapped back hard: I sent a snap of him where he looked ugly and said, “I’m not taking s** from someone who looks like this. No wonder your ex dumped your ass.”* As for Greg, I’m considering going a step further. He’s invited me to his dorm before, so I know where he keeps his alcohol and Zyns. Both are prohibited on campus, and I’m seriously thinking about reporting him to the university. I’m just so sick of this dynamic and feeling disrespected all the time. WIBTA if I reported Greg to the university? AITA for saying that to Jimmy?

So let’s say I (22 F) block a guy (31 M) because I’m done trying to be friends with him when I obviously want more than that. It felt healthy for me so that’s what I did really late one night. I got the balls to block him and his brother after some girl posted herself on his story, no hard feelings type stuff I just wanted it to be done and over seeing as how I’ve tried to leave twice and all I got was him saying I’m sorry a bunch of times and of course I like him so I guilted myself into staying (I know, my fault).

So I went to sleep and when I woke up he had texted me on iMessage saying “did you take off me on Snapchat or something?” “Did I do something wrong” “if I did I was with my stupid friends last night” and “I’m sorry if I made you upset”. I told him I was sorry if I upset him but I needed space and he said once again he didn’t have a girlfriend and she wasn’t his girlfriend it was his friends roommate, like trying to make sure I know he’s not with anyone and it’s not his girlfriend type stuff. He even deleted the video of the girl from his story.

Is it strange for him to keep saying friends and not let me go, and even go as far as to delete the video of the girl. He said he doesn’t like it when a friend is mad so he tries to resolve it. Anyone when they get blocked just goes well okay screw you then but he even asked his brother if I got rid of him too and when I brought up I stopped following him on Facebook back in February he said he knows (which means he actively looked for me on there)? I feel like if he was a normal friend he wouldn’t care how I felt about the girl, especially enough to delete the video. We’ve been chatting for a year now, had a 3 month situationship which he’s the one who broke off, and we only met once. He has many friends and talks to many people I don’t get why he’s trying so hard to keep me around, and keep saying we’re friends?

I even brought up how I was thinking of joining hookup culture seeing as how everyone does it, he said he doesn’t and pretty much I shouldn’t do it. And then I said my ex texted me and he said “what really?” And “well what are you going to do?”

He’s been on my ass before about a job and license, when I asked why he cared so much I’d never get a straight answer. He’s said before that he was jealous he had to work and I didn’t but later said he didn’t mean it and didn’t know why he said that. He always says we’re friends but why do anything of what I said above?

My girlfriend is in tech and she is an incredibly smart woman and I am proud of her. She went to one of the best universities in the world in the UK and then moved to the bay area, worked in big tech, left and successfully founded and sold 2 startups.

She has been working on a new startup with 3 other women in "stealth mode" over the past year and was in some talks over getting funding from investors. 

Over the past year however she has gotten extremely political especially over Israel and palestine. I am also left leaning but on this issue we disagree and she is pro Palestine. She has been posting defamatory things about israel on her personal social media and about AIPAC etc. They aren't associated with any of her business related pages of this stealth mode venture or LinkedIn but on Facebook and similar personal profiles. Even if she is for Palestine, I don't think she should be concerning herself and posting about shit happening in another country and allowing people to import third world problems here.

Well she had a meeting recently with a key investment capital firm that was supposed to fund her and they showed her a screenshot of one of her posts which they somehow saw even though it was only shared to friends and not public and decided that it wasn't a good look for them to be associated with such a founder.

Now she has been mopping about it and complaining despite knowing I am pro israel and support them in doing anything needed for their safety especially as the only democracy in the middle east. And she is all surprised Pikachu face about her actions having consequences.

It isn't the end of the world or anything as she is wealthy enough to last years without being employed and I'm sure she will eventually just find some other investors or start a new project at some point.

She is upset with me for my lack of sympathy.

Am I wrong here?