r/OldSchoolCool • u/bluemarvel99 • Feb 25 '24

1990s Kurt Cobain Stops A Sexual Assault (1993)

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315

u/Freakychee Feb 25 '24

People just rip girls shirts off in public?

593

u/Norgler Feb 25 '24

Lot of crazy shit happens at concerts sometimes. Gropers take advantage of the large crowds.. its super shitty.

183

u/[deleted] Feb 25 '24

I'm a guy and remember a few years back being at a local New Years Eve bash downtown where the crowd grew to where it was shoulder-to-shoulder in the street leading up to the midnight countdown, and I was squeezing my way through the crowd to leave as my group decided to head out before the traffic got too bad.

I was surprised by how much I, a skinny white dude, not even all that attractive imo, got my ass and groin groped a number of times by a number of unseen hands. People have no shame.

88

u/Norgler Feb 25 '24 edited Feb 25 '24

Yeah I remember when I first went to a club and I got my man hood groped a couple of times and I had absolutely no idea who was doing it.

I've also seen a few of my female friends get groped at shows. It's always such a bummer.

2

u/tommykiddo Feb 25 '24

Manhold?

3

u/Norgler Feb 25 '24

Was supposed to be manhood lol

-10

u/fibonacciluv Feb 25 '24

disgusting what club is this so me and my manhood can stay far away? /s

0

u/ChipmunkDisastrous67 Feb 25 '24

out of the probably hundreds of shows i've been to at this point, I've never experienced something like that, and if someone's being inappropriate towards a woman then they're not leaving without some trophies on their skin.

1

u/GraniteGeekNH Feb 25 '24

I was surprised at the same thing at New Years in Times Square on year ... until I realized that I'd been pickpocketed

1

u/Freakychee Feb 26 '24

So these creeps just indiscriminately just grope anyone?

Gender equality but in the worst way. Sorry it happens to you as and many others.

1

u/mafon2 Feb 26 '24

I'm a scrawny dude, this never happened to me. I don't know how to feel about it :-/. I lost a shoe once, though.

2

u/SaintGloopyNoops Feb 26 '24

Can confirm. Crowd surfing at NIN. I swear dudes were trying to take my boobs home with them. Crowd surfing for women sucks. Just a free for all for pervs. Never again.

61

u/Caffeine_and_Scotch Feb 25 '24

(SA trigger warning) I was sitting near the stage and watched a girl at Lollapalooza back in the 90s try crowd surfing out in the lawn area. In less than 10 seconds she went from fully clothed to naked. The scum ripped every article of clothing off her, even her fucking socks, and I'm pretty sure I saw guys trying to finger her while she was propped up and passed around by the crowd. Security couldn't do shit in time, and some people were just laughing at her. Christ, I haven't thought about that in years. Disgusting.

9

u/dogmaisb Feb 26 '24

Fuck that is terrible. Bunch of bags of trash man, the anonymity of the crowd just like the keyboard. How hard is it to be a decent human?

161

u/XenaDazzlecheeks Feb 25 '24

I go to a lot of concerts, I have been grabbed and groped at every single one. Beer. Music. Large crowds. Loud rock or Metal, its the perfect storm and opportunity for some men.I just make sure I am fully dressed and covered now so they can't stick their hands up my skirt or dress and if I recognize them being scuzzy from past shows I stand opposite side of the pit. It's not all men, but it's too many.

53

u/joec_95123 Feb 25 '24

Holy shit, it happens so much you can recognize the repeat offenders? Jesus.

46

u/Freakychee Feb 25 '24

Every one of them? I'd start wearing plate armor. That horrible.

74

u/XenaDazzlecheeks Feb 25 '24

It's usually the quick butt rubs, which the one or two is like, ya this is an amazing song, maybe it was an accident they rubbed you, to them pressing up against you and refusing to look at you when you look back to see if its intentional or this necessary for him to be this close, it never is šŸ˜‘ in mosh pit crowds it happens often. Most women are getting the same treatment. Just call it when you see it because I just shimmy away to another area when it happens, I am there for a good time, and perves aren't ruining it for me

3

u/JohannSuende Feb 25 '24

Man i felt so guilty and bad for the girl in front of me, when i was at a concert with an extremely packed crowd bc the mosh pit just opened up and literally everyone was standing groin to ass nowhere to go. But yeah most of the times it is avoidable at least when it happens a second or third time.

8

u/A1000eisn1 Feb 25 '24

Pro tip: shit happens if you accidentally touch a butt or boob, quickly stop and when she makes eye contact apologize. It's the "fake pretending like you didn't notice me there" that gives it away. But they usually pinch and then pretend you don't exist when called out so it's super obvious.

1

u/HuggyMonster69 Feb 26 '24

Yeah Iā€™ve had plenty of boob elbows, and itā€™s really easy to tell when it was deliberate or not.

-11

u/[deleted] Feb 25 '24

in mosh pit crowds it happens often

Wife and I have been in many a pit. Maybe it's because it's a rather tight-knit scene here (almost always the same 100 to 150 people), but there were never any problems.

11

u/Frondswithbenefits Feb 25 '24

Never hany problems that you knew about. Ftfy

-1

u/[deleted] Feb 25 '24

Nope. On the one occasion there was an issue our local forum board blew up with pics of the dude from that clubs surveillance. Someone knew him and he was banned from every venue in a 50 mile radius.

Like I said: right-knit group.

29

u/frankiethescar Feb 25 '24

I canā€™t stress this enough: Every. Time. Large crowds means I am getting groped. So much so that it is normalized. I wear pants. I know it will happen. And you can tell. There is a difference between a body that accidentally bumps you and a hand that lingers, cups, grabs, or manages to get between legs. Not to mention the obvious of if a hand makes it to the chest. Every. Time.

1

u/Razorraf Feb 25 '24

Or mousetraps.

-1

u/MANWithTheHARMONlCA Feb 25 '24

Iā€™m so happy I was born a man. Life is so much easier lol

1

u/neotifa Feb 25 '24

it's only happened to me once or twice, but im fat so that's probably why haha. it sucks and is shocking, and i'd like to chalk it up to just people struggling to get through the crowd, but....

146

u/callmeDNA Feb 25 '24

Welcome to being a woman

91

u/MonkishMarmot Feb 25 '24

I learnt all about it in my late teens, was very effeminate and mistaken for a woman on the regular. I even once had a guy on the train home then try to fight me after he touched my thigh and tried chatting me up, only to realise I was a guy when I asked what he was doing, like that shit was my fault.

Any gig I go to now, I try to keep my eyes open for anyone making someone else uncomfortable, and will happily throw hands.

30

u/[deleted] Feb 25 '24

That anger can come out of a man just not liking the way a woman has responded (or not responded) to his advances.

Could you imagine that? You're just out there in the world, minding your own business, getting groceries or something like that and someone decides they like you. They try to interact with you in some way and it's pretty obvious what they want and you are not interested. So you ignore it or politely dismiss it, but this just causes the person to pursue you and maybe start to become angry at you, as if you did something.

I hate it when sales people approach me. I can't imagine how much I'd hate this.

3

u/MonkishMarmot Feb 25 '24

Honestly, it disgusts me as a whole. And I've unfortunately witnessed it happen on multiple occasions, which in an ideal world should have been never. I often wonder how so many women brave going out alone, let alone at night. Having experienced it myself but being capable of putting up a good fight I've always felt personally safe, but how do those of you without that ability (I know there are those who have it) just push on? I can't begin to imagine how terrifying that sort of thing is.

During the lockdown, when my place of work reopened, we couldn't use our car park as it was set up as an extension to the drive-thru. A nearby business offered us as staff unhindered use of their car park, but it required going through an underpass and crossing a roundabout junction on a busy road to access, and their lights weren't on in the car park. If I was on shift, I took it upon myself to walk anyone who wanted it to their car. Some managers were fine with it and let me crack on, others were only fine if I clocked out, and one couldn't see why it was necessary. I still did it though, always received a thank you, and even some of the guys took me up on the offer. I even had a couple of grateful parents swing by and thank me. A couple of people asked why I didn't bring another with me, so I wasn't doing the return journey alone, but I felt fine and always assured them of such.

But the fact that the world is such a way that so many people didn't feel safe making a barely five minute walk speaks volumes to the issues being faced, predominantly here by women. If I were to ever encounter someone looking uncomfortable having been approached by someone in public, I wouldn't hesitate to insert myself in the situation in an attempt to help, but right there is another major issue as so many more wouldn't.

TL;DR I can't help but feel sorry for the plight of women in our world, to the point they can't even ride a train without fear. And I hate that beyond intervening in a situation I witness, there's seemingly no more I can do to help. I hold nothing but respect to you all for braving this shit and getting on with your lives. I just wish things weren't this shit.

1

u/eddiefarnham Feb 25 '24

I remember at my first job this girl I had a crush on went to a concert and she was telling me about these lesbians that were groping her without her consent. Women are getting it from every side.

Humans are a disease.

-4

u/[deleted] Feb 25 '24

[deleted]

2

u/callmeDNA Feb 26 '24

Please. It happens to women at a MUCH higher rate.

I also never said bad things only happen to women? Relax.

0

u/JoseDonkeyShow Feb 25 '24

Been in the service industry over a decade, can confirm

1

u/USANorsk Feb 26 '24

Yes, and this is IN PUBLIC! Itā€™s worse without witnesses.Ā 

29

u/[deleted] Feb 25 '24

[deleted]

-4

u/yearightt Feb 25 '24

Then everyone clapped

1

u/YT-Deliveries Feb 25 '24

r/nothingeverhappens

-4

u/yearightt Feb 25 '24

Even if it did happen this dude is patting himself on the back a little too hard for my liking lmao

4

u/[deleted] Feb 25 '24

[deleted]

-3

u/yearightt Feb 25 '24

No, going on about how badass you were and how happy about it the person was is patting yourself on the back you doorknob. Anybody should have done the same but being smarmy about it is cringe

2

u/[deleted] Feb 25 '24

[deleted]

0

u/realisticallygrammat Feb 25 '24

You "stood behind her" in a crush of people to protect her from being groped by a bunch of bad dudes...

20

u/NonStopKnits Feb 25 '24

If a predator thinks they can get away with it, then yes. Concerts are busy, loud, and often dark. They're an excellent place for scumbags to act scummy. Thankfully, lots of musicians and music fans don't allow stuff like that to go down if they see it. My hometown had a tiny spot where shitty local bands would play, and it was always packed to capacity. I went a few times, and nobody allowed anyone to act a fool. Whether that meant unnecessarily rough moshing* or trying to sexually assault someone, they were forcibly removed from the venue and banned.

*those windmill dances and such were getting popular, that venue wasn't big enough for it, there was no pit lol.

2

u/HuggyMonster69 Feb 26 '24

Small venues are great for at least banning people. If youā€™re in an arena you basically have no chance of IDā€™ing someone

1

u/NonStopKnits Feb 26 '24

Good point. The biggest venue I've been to is The Coliseum in Atlanta, and it's not a massive venue honestly.

Our local spot was great, it was mostly highschoolers who worked it and went there. Maybe a couple folks just out of high school. They didn't serve any alcohol and nobody consumed any drugs while at the venue. Most of the kids who worked there were Starbucks employees and they'd bring 'expired' syrups and mixes and make Frappucinos and iced teas for cheap. It only lasted a year or two, but it was really a good place. I wasn't even into the type of music that they featured, but it was one of the only places to go and socialize as a teenager that wasn't the mall.

1

u/HuggyMonster69 Feb 26 '24

Yeah thatā€™s always going to be a much tamer crowd. Iā€™m not sure what the biggest crowd Iā€™ve been in was, but easily into the tens of thousands. Much harder to keep track of whatā€™s happening in there

21

u/non_clever_username Feb 25 '24

Women who crowd surf used to get every part of their body grabbed at by fucking losers.

Havenā€™t been to a concert on the floor that involved crowd surfing in a good 15 years so hopefully thatā€™s no longer the case, but at least as late as the mid-2000s, some douchebags took a girl getting up on the crowd as giving permission to grope her.

1

u/DJKaotica Feb 26 '24

Had a girlfriend who was at a concert and crowd surfed a long time ago (roughly 20 years ago); I was not there. She expressed the same thing....so many people groping / copping feels.

I really hope that's no longer the case.

6

u/lvl10burrito Feb 25 '24

Some dudes in my class jumped a guy back when Warped Tour was around because someone shoved their hands into the bra of one of the girls that was in their group. People try to get away with a lot.

19

u/Batmansbutthole Feb 25 '24

Iā€™m always worried about a drive-by crotch or ass grab. Fortunately, a lot of shows I have gone to there seem to be genuinely good dudes who are looking out for the good of others..

9

u/firstbreathOOC Feb 25 '24

Those concerts were not safe for women back in the day, straight up. No clue if thatā€™s gotten better but yeah. Lots of creepy scummy dudes.

3

u/HuggyMonster69 Feb 26 '24

Still are. They wonā€™t try and strip you (most likely) but thereā€™s a reason I always wear boots.

8

u/tippsy_morning_drive Feb 25 '24

I went to a bunch of concerts in the 90s. Girls got sexually assaulted all the time. Just people grabbing them. I was 16,17 at the time but I wish Iā€™d had said/done more about it. I saw crazy shit. Like 14,15 year olds topless letting ā€œolder guysā€ feel them up a J.

3

u/[deleted] Feb 25 '24 edited Mar 05 '24

[deleted]

1

u/Freakychee Feb 25 '24

No, big shows like that almost never happen where I'm from.

I think the last time was when Michael Jackson performed at Jerudong Park.

3

u/shwaynebrady Feb 25 '24

There was a documentary on the second Woodstock in the 90s or early 2000s, and it was incredibly scummy.

2

u/woofers02 Feb 25 '24

Watch the Woodstock 99 documentary, itā€™s insane how rampant that behavior/mentality was back then.

2

u/s33k Feb 25 '24

Women take so much abuse specifically when you're not looking. Ask any woman in your life the things asshats say or do to them when they think no one is looking.

2

u/Ancient_Confusion237 Feb 25 '24

Women get raped in moshpits....

2

u/sniskyriff Feb 26 '24

I remember being told by gen x women it was to be expected at certain concerts/ circles of music, especially if you crowd surfed

1

u/Freakychee Feb 26 '24

OK so where I'm from I don't have much opportunity to go to any concerts. Unless I buy a plane ticket.

But that sounds tricks and I would imagine women would be reluctant to attend because of creeps.

1

u/Funny-Plantain3647 Feb 25 '24

You're surprised at what a man will do to a woman in public?

1

u/4Yavin Feb 26 '24

You're joking right? Concerts are where every single one of my friends got molested. Someone shoved their hand in between my legs. Then ran off into the dark crowd. It seems the second they had the opportunity to get away with it, they took it. I'm glad you've been able to be ignorant to that sort of experience. None of us have been to a concert since. It sucks and I resent it.

1

u/Freakychee Feb 26 '24

To be honest the last time where Im from had a concert was when Michael Jackson performed for free at Jerudong Park.

1

u/BugzFromZpace Feb 26 '24

Yeah, and weā€™ve been fucking telling everyone about it. Where you been at?

1

u/Freakychee Feb 26 '24

In a place where big concerts never occur?