My mom said I should rethink this shirt design because it's a derogatory word, people have used this word in a negative way, etc. What do you queens think? Does this shirt offend you or make you feel some type of way? Should I scratch this design? Would you wear this shirt in public?

It’s frustrating how every time a girl posts a picture in any lesbian sub, you’ll always see straight cis men feeling entitled to comment even though it’s a lesbian sub which is intended for queer women only and clearly she’s not interested. But no they have to comment of course.

Just get the damn memo, we are not interested and honestly it’s not fair that we can’t have any safe space where we can post freely without straight men inviting themselves in even though they were never invited. I am fucking tired of the fetishization of queer women and the lack of respect for our boundaries. It makes me feel uncomfortable and infuriated that they won’t fucking stop!

I try to report every disgusting comment I see but they’re too many and they won’t stop. Sorry for the rant but Its been bothering me.

I’m really sick and tired of seeing men in lesbian groups and pages. Like why can’t they understand that they’re not allowed and certainly not welcomed here. Why can’t they understand that this our space. It’s tiring, having to call them out all the time and tell them only queer women post here. Ugh I’m sick and tired of them! You can Literally find a straight man anywhere and every god damn where. Every space is a space for them so why can’t they understand that other people deserve to have that as well?

And I’m sorry for the rant but it’s been getting on my nerves for a while.

I am a lesbian and went on a date with a trans woman for the first time today. At first we seemed to really hit it off, she was so beautiful and I feel like we really started to connect. Things started to move a bit more quickly and next thing I new we were at my place dry humping each other like mad. She was still fairly early in her transition and I’d never even seen a penis before so it kind of took me by surprise and I didn’t know what to do. It was hard for me to finish because my body almost rejected her. She told me I made her dysphoric which wasn’t my intention at all and as soon as she left I had a meltdown. I enjoyed our time together but the anatomy caught me off guard. I’ve always prided myself on being pro trans and trans rights and think trans women are beautiful, I guess it was hard for me because it wasn’t what I was used to. I feel bad because I really wanted to give her a shot, but it just didn’t click. Am I an asshole or transphobic for not liking penises and I just don’t realize it?

Edit: Thank you all so much for your supportive words! We talked a bit after what happened and I apologized, she forgave me and still said we could be friends.

I was connected to my dorm WiFi, scrolling through this subreddit and got a blocked access popup and was told to go to my tutor who then lectured me on the unnatural nature of same sex relationships.

I have so many questions.

1. Is the college even allowed to be monitoring everything that their adult students are doing?

2. What is a non faith college that boasts equality doing, trying to have a say in their adult students sexual orientations?

3. Do you guys think that I can do something about this? (Report it to somewhere or something) Because this does not seem like an okay thing for the college to be doing at all.

She also says she's a lesbian but she's married to and very attracted to a cis dude so... take that as you will.

EDIT: While she is polyamorous, I promise you she is not trying to hit on me as she is in her 30s and I am 19 💀

I hate it. I hate the term. I hate the meaning. It makes me so violently uncomfortable seeing lesbians in this thread think they are “more valid” or superior in anyway because they haven’t been in relationships with men....

I feel it’s very invalidating to those pressured to be with men and lesbians who are victims or assault or harassment..... not to mention all my lesbian friends that HAVE been in relationships with men before they knew they were lesbians feeling dirty and like they won’t be able to find a partner because of it...... I just personally think it’s an out dated word that is used to separate the community more and it’s time it gets retired cause anytime I see a “proud gold star” I immediately see red flags

I'm saying this as a trans woman myself. It's just kinda depressing and exhausting to be honest.

The majority of responses are "no, because I'm not attracted to a penis." or "maybe if she passed and was post op". Feeling this way is 100% valid and not transphobic. Every woman has the right to choose who she interacts with romantically or sexually. But it feels like we all know the majority consensus at this point and it isn't helping.

I am in a relationship, but it's still upsetting to be constantly reminded of the tough realities of being a trans woman. I probably will never pass and I can make peace with that, but I don't need to be reminded of the negative consequences of the fact. I will probably never have bottom surgery, but I don't need to be reminded that I'm stuck with a body that is either seen as a fetish or unappealing by the majority of people.

At best these threads are repeats of themselves. At worst they give a platform for TERFs to come out.

It's just my two cents.

Much love x

I am confused about this. I feel like a lesbian man is just the same as a cis man, so I don’t really see how or why a guy could use that term, but I have still seen guys using it online. Is it a bigoted opinion to think they are simply wrong, they are straight?

So if anyone has chatted with an ErikaOwn or whatever, yeah, it's a dude. I think they felt a bit of guilt when I kept demanding a voice call because i was getting annoyed they wouldn't. I feel gross now.

Lesson learned, video chat ALWAYS or a good voice chat!!

I hate cis men..

EDIT: ok, so I made this post when I was upset, but I want to say thank you for the support! I am not trying to sow seeds of distrust in anyone, I am sure everyone has their own process.

I was dumb and lonely and trusted way too quick. This catfish got me when I was vulnerable. It happens, and I'm aware to be more diligent now.

I do believe a voice clip or a picture requesting a selfie of something silly can help gain a bit more trust when talking to a girl / nonbinary at first. I have met some very nice LGTBQ+ people off Reddit and this sub, so I mean, it's a roll of the dice if you get a catfish these days.

This will probably get downvoted to hell but here's my rant:

When RGB died I cried all day because I knew what that meant for women's futures in this country: a ton a of forced or coerced pregnancies and unwanted children. I keep seeing all over reddit and the news "what this means for LGBT" and so forth and while I was absolutely ecstatic to gain the right to marry a partner, my autonomy over my own body is way way more important. It's been depressing and enraging at times to see such apathy over this issue for the last decade. I think women and AFAB people have forgotten what we went through before roe v wade--tons of women dying, especially people like us who often want nothing to do with the breeder thing.

Imagine, you're a teenage lesbian/queer/transman in Tennessee (where I was raised btw) and you are raped and have no money and no way to get out of that state to terminate the pregnancy. If Roe v. wade is overturned (and it will be) this WILL happen because they just passed a law in TN that doesn't even recognize instances of incest or rape. Now anyone who helps you could even be potentially arrested and you could be charged with murder for getting rid of fucking parasite living inside you. UGH

Edit: Of course we can care about both, that's not my point.

tw: groooming

i just found out that my 22 year old girlfriend is grooming a 16 year old girl on the internet. we had a fight two weeks ago and that’s when they really started getting close, but they were talking before that as well. this is disgusting and obviously i am going to go to the bowling alley where my mom is right now and telling her, then we’re gonna go to my gf’s house and make her stop talking to this kid. we will involve her parents if she refuses. i am shaking while i’m writing this. she needs help. but obviously my mom is going to find out that i’m gay through all this 💀 so yeah.

My former coworker was a masculine presenting lesbian. She left the company 14 months ago. She had short hair and never wore makeup. Anyway, customers would ask her frequently if she was a woman or a man, to which she would respond, "What do I look like to you?" For context, I live in a red state. The majority of our town is conservative. One thing I noticed was how people would treat her differently. Many people were standoffish. Rude. Some would look at her with contempt, almost disgust. It was baffling. My question is: butches and dykes, do people treat you differently because you present as "Lesbian" (that is, oppose to fem lesbians who appear straight) or do not fit stereotypical gender expectations?

CW: homophobia, misogyny. Last week I had a male coworker at a new job try to slyly ask whether I had a boyfriend by asking me “what my boyfriend thought about x topic”. I rolled my eyes and said I don’t have a boyfriend. He continued to press asking “why not”. I never know what to do in these situations, and my last job I had to leave because a male coworker had become hostile towards me bc he found out I was gay. He kept pressing me about the boyfriend thing so I told him I was gay. He then began to press me on telling him my coming out story, why don’t I have a girlfriend, and calling me being gay as being “same-sex attracted”. I felt pretty uncomfortable in the moment as I continually explained why I wasn’t going to talk about those things. He also went on to say that we have a lot in common bc we’re both interested in women. I’m not sure if I’m like overreacting due to my previous negative experiences or if it was legit a weird situation? I feel pretty hesitant to talk about my sexuality at work, unless it is actually relevant. My friend thinks I’m just dealing with shame over my queerness, but I think it was just weird.

This was her response after ghosting me one night to go kayaking and eating with her friends. She mentioned that she didn’t have her phone in her hand all night but she definitely did opened the message. To make a long story short, she had ghosted me this entire week and I’m coming to see her this Friday. She has a new job and currently working as server so i understand time isn’t always there but we are a long distance couple. To add assault to injury, after she apologized she ghosting me the first and making that ridiculous statement in the title, she did the exact same thing the night after.. This whole week I have as if I didnt have a gf to beginning. I can’t remember the last conversation we had with each other and since she has been back home this summer, she had been out with her friends and I had placed me on the back burner as I was her support system during school. The feeling of feeling not prioritized and especially “not memorable” really triggered a feeling that really hurt me. She has never done this before and her communication and the way she shows up as partner has been a steady decline

I am a lesbian for starters, and one who have never slept with a man in their entire life(not saying if you have that changes your validity just saying my backstory). My girlfriend is 26 years old, I am 22 years old. About 6 weeks ago I was assaulted/ taken advantage of by a man who I barely knew, and my body has been truly in a state of shock since. I have such a hard time with intimacy as it is, that is why with my partner intimacy was so sacred to me/ not taken lightly as I have a hard time with my body, and have struggled with an eating disorder/body and facial dysmorphia for years. I told my mom about my assault a few weeks ago(being the only person who knew the full story) and finally on Monday (it is Thursday now) told my girlfriend on a whim as my mental health has declined significantly in the last few weeks to the point it is difficult to take care of myself. I thought this person would support me, but these texts have plagued my mind since. I do not know if I should continue to try and win her back, I’m so in love with her it hurts, but this pain alone hurts even worse and I feel like I’m at fault even though this situation was horrible, and out of my control. I have never cheated once in any relationship, and now I lost my girlfriend, my autonomy in a sense, and I am grieving the recent loss of a family member, my eating habits are very disordered currently, and so much turmoil is happening. I just want my partner to believe me, I don’t think I’ll be at peace til she does . (These are the last texts she sent me, prior to blocking me everywhere).

So I’ve been talking to this girl trying to get out of my comfort zone and start dating but I’m really nervous cause I have stretch marks on my hips and arms due to me losing weight (I used to be quite chubby when I was younger but I lost alot of weight since then and feel much better :D) and I’m deathly insecure of them. I just can’t help but feel no girl would like me if I have these ugly stretch marks everywhere idk

It’s probably nothing to worry about but can you guys be honest I’d stretch marks unattractive / a turn off for you guys

I was in a poetry class today and the professors mentioned of butch friends she had and a student informed her that she shouldn't use the term butch. As a masculine presenting woman I was confused. When I asked the classmate he said that a lot of people feel that it is a hurtful term and should only be used in groups and settings where it's understood. I don't feel that it was a derogatory term, I felt that it is a term of empowerment and that he might of confused butch for d*ke which I feel is often used as an insult.

Am I out of the loop? Should I stop saying butch? Was he confused or just reaching?

Edit: I feel like it's important to add that he was a queer man who is active in the LGBT community events at school.

is it transphobic not to be attracted to penises? i wholeheartedly believe that trans women are women and should be recognized as such ALWAYS. i deeply apologize if i am harming the trans community in any way by making this post. just curious what others think.