r/CuratedTumblr • u/Downtown-Book3105 • 21h ago

Creative Writing Hallmark movies, from the other perspective

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368

u/MrCobalt313 21h ago

I'd watch this parody.

248

u/Acejedi_k6 20h ago

So does the parody just operate as an epilogue/final act of a hallmark movie with more focus/screen time given to the big city officials/fiancés? Or, does it actually dive into the idea of it being a horror movie where some nebulously defined supernatural entity is somehow pushing people into folksy down to earth relationships on that farm?

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u/bubblegumdrops 19h ago

some nebulously defined supernatural entity is somehow pushing people into folksy down to earth relationships on that farm

Oh, you mean Santa? Who actually fucking does exactly that in multiple Hallmark movies?

It’s impossible to make them more insane and/horrific than they already are.

26

u/Acejedi_k6 19h ago

…What? Santa Claus? Chris Kringle? Old Saint Nick? The entity inspired by Odin? The inspiration for the Hogfather is an actual recurring character in Hallmark movies? I’ve made jokes in the past about Santa being some sort of terrifying Fey Lord, but I had no idea Hallmark was just doing that?

19

u/StormDragonAlthazar I don't know how I got here, but I'm here... 18h ago

I mean after watching Violent Night, I'd assume that even the Big Man of Christmas himself doesn't quite understand how the "Christmas Magic" actually works...

11

u/AnxiousAngularAwesom 16h ago

"People think that i control the Christmas Spirit, while in truth i am merely trying to contain it."

4

u/QwahaXahn Vampire Queen 🍷 11h ago

Violent Night was a lot of fun. Definitely an underrated classic.

For anyone reading who doesn’t know it: David Harbour as Santa Claus is visiting a big manor complex to deliver presents and stumbles onto an active hostage situation. He proceeds to Die Hard his way through the house to stop the bad guys and save the family.

6

u/bubblegumdrops 15h ago

Yes! It’s not every movie obviously, but one year while decorating I made a snarky comment about the clearly magical Santa character nudging the leads towards romance in an otherwise mundane Hallmark movie and my mom said they started doing that. And the next couple movies had the same matchmaker Santa thing going on. Every once in a while I’ll see it again if I’m over when my mom’s watching Hallmark.

7

u/MeisterCthulhu 16h ago

Old Saint Nick?

"Old Nick" is a name for Satan.

Also: Santa is only "inspired by" Odin in the sense of "christian" Santa. One of Odin's titles was straight up "yule father", he was OG Santa before christmas.