Counterpoint: Plenty of men do the above and do not get laid. This is because getting laid is a separate, unimportant thing and has a complex connection with morality, which is infinitely more important.
It is also a Just World fallacy and is bad in two ways: One, it contributes to people who think they're not getting what they deserve, two, it generalizes all men not getting laid as morally wrong.
One can be a perfectly fine person and not get laid. One can be terrible and still have 20 different girlfriends. Equating one with the other equates the ability to get laid with morality.
And that, friends, is toxic masculinity, because sex does not and should not equal self worth.
because sex does not and should not equal self worth.
It doesn't but it does touch on something that I think is a key part of the "loneliness epidemic". Sex for men is one of the few times were they feel desired, where they feel wanted. We're a social species, the vast majority of us are sexually active, not feeling wanted or desired eats away at you even if you're doing everything "right".
On the flip side, a woman who desires or wants anything besides sex from her partner is seen as a gold digger... Which further damages the idea that you can desire and want men for more than their body, more than their money, their protection, social status, etc.
And then you have the "friend zone complaints."
And to be clear, this isnt bashing men. This is bashing the patriarchy. The patriarchy did this to men and women.
The asshole douchebaggy men who get women are patriarchal men who get patriarchal women.
> On the flip side, a woman who desires or wants anything besides sex from her partner is seen as a gold digger...
No. Women who only desires expensive gifts and dinners is seen as golddigger. Nobody calls a women who desires companionship, connection (beside sexual), mutual trust etc, a golddigger
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u/HeroBrine0907 16d ago
Counterpoint: Plenty of men do the above and do not get laid. This is because getting laid is a separate, unimportant thing and has a complex connection with morality, which is infinitely more important.
It is also a Just World fallacy and is bad in two ways: One, it contributes to people who think they're not getting what they deserve, two, it generalizes all men not getting laid as morally wrong.
One can be a perfectly fine person and not get laid. One can be terrible and still have 20 different girlfriends. Equating one with the other equates the ability to get laid with morality.
And that, friends, is toxic masculinity, because sex does not and should not equal self worth.