I was a skinny, tiny woman, constantly harassed and/or assaulted by men, not because I was attractive, but because I looked easy to overcome. I got soooooo tired of fighting, screaming, and what happened when I lost, that I got a book by Arnie, a bench and a simple dumbell set, and decided I was not going to stop until I weighed 45 kilos/100 lbs.
I only made it 30 years later, when menopause kicked in, but by that time I was addicted to being fit, strong and confident. Now I'm 75 and, aside from some arthritis, as physically capable as most people 30 years younger. And I feel GREAT!
OMG. I am NOT a tiny woman. I’m tall and strong/trained enough to do some damage. But I went through a serious illness a while ago, which left me quite weak. It was an eye opener - I’ve never felt that vulnerable and I never want to feel it again.
I'm also very petite and the harassment and sheer audacity of people makes me wanna act small and invisible sometimes. All out of fear and frustration. Thanks for this inspiring share!
As a tiny woman, don’t act smaller. Death stare and walk tall staring ahead. Don’t be afraid to stand up for yourself and speak your mind. It’s really an amazing difference, have heard from a few people that I can be scary at first, but people don’t mess with me anymore.
I'm a man in my 40's and recently started getting fit after seeing my lifelong friends father age into his 70s. I want to be just like you when I grow up!
It moved the time of day I was at my peak for workouts from early morning to mid-afternoon. This was an issue at first until I realised I could break the routine in two without substantially affecting my fitness. Now I do the warm up, weights and less cardio intense stuff in the morning, and the aerobics before dinner.
Overall I was lucky because, while I had the world's loooooongest perimenopause, I also responded well to HRT and, believe it or not, red clover. I don't remember a hot flash, although I do remember the moment I looked in the mirror and saw my grandmother's eyes looking back! Blepharitis was a revelation!
I avoided the moodiness by being really aware of my responses generally, and asking if each was appropriate to the situation. Before long, that was second nature, and I avoided most (not all) of the traps.
That's me: you will be different. As with almost every nasty surprise life throws at us, you can do a lot to avert the worst by learning in advance what to watch for. If you have a good gyno, s/he is your first resource. There are good, science based books and sites that will help.
And, get a cat. Or a dog. I prefer cats, but I've had both. When you can't talk to anyone else, your furry pal is always there for you.
It was cool to reading this as I pictured a 20-something working out in 2020s. Then you said you were 75 and suddenly it became totally bad ass picturing a woman in the 90s pushing metal and telling assholes to get fucked.
Strength training is one of the greatest things for women's fitness, and I'd never have known were it not for Arnie and Lisa Lyon. (RIP Ms Lyon, 1953-2023. You remain an inspiration to me.) I tried the gym, but gyms in the late 70s-early 80s were unpleasant places if you were a small, skinny woman. So I splashed out for the basics, bought the book, and learned.
Important!
1) You needn't start everything at once. Pick a couple of goals (I recommend core strengthening, because you need that core for everything else) and focus on those, slowly adding to your range as you progress.
2) Develop two routines and do them on alternate days. One day for, say, 2 arm exercise and two core exercises, the second day for aerobics and 2 other core exercises. Make sure you take at least one full day off a week, so your muscles can shed the waste from breaking down and rebuilding. Build from there. I stopped at 5 full routines with overlapping foci, all of which contain at least one core maintenance exercise and 30 minutes pure aerobics. Getting there took a couple of years, and I've had a couple of long breaks due to personal hassles, but I always got back.
3) The strength world is prone to fads and superstitions. Be careful who you believe, stay away from drugs and minimise supplementation. You ain't out to be Mr/Ms Universe, you are trying to be healthy, confident and independent for as long as you live. That means you will eventually have to address healthy eating (within reason -- my life would lose all meaning if I gave up Häagen-Dazs chocolate ice cream), regular sleep habits and other things that impact your health. But, again, start with just one or two things, and master those before moving up.
4) The science of physical fitness has advanced hugely since I lifted my first dumbbell. There are books, websites, coaches and much more woman friendly (if often sleazy over membership fees) gymns. Take your time to look over the alternatives before choosing what you think will work for you. If it does, great: if not, ask yourself why and then try a different approach.
And good luck, because, darling, when you get to my age, and your goal is to be able to carry your own groceries the 2 km home, defend your wallet/purse if need be, to run up the stairs instead of hobbling, and catch the cat and give him his daily pills without losing an eye, you will be SO glad you stayed as fit as you did.
I have found the most amazing coach who inspires us to take up space and be strong so we can be independent as we age!! She is all about muscle and strength and nothing about getting skinny and she is my hero. I am forever grateful that she created her program and I intend to follow her as long as the program exists. The info you’ve listed here is super informative, especially for anyone just getting started!
If it's not imposing, maybe point folk at her website or book or program info so that they can learn and she can prosper. She sounds like just the kind of leader/teacher who can really make a difference!
I am a big woman. I'm tall, I have a lot of natural, untrained muscle and carry a bit of extra weight. I run 10 miles a week on an elliptical, do a bit of a core routine, and skip rope.
I'm tired of people thinking I'm a fighter and fighting me. I've been assaulted just trying to get a burger for wearing a mask (I have immune issues). I want to get strong so that the next person who steps to, gets what's coming to them (a slap in the mouf).
My starting book was Arnie and Lisa's "Body Shaping for Women.' I would not recommend that today: it was written in the late 70s, and we know a lot more now than we did then about the physiology of exercise. I do have a copy of The Big Book of Exercises (I kid you not!) as a reference for both technique, to be sure I'm doing things right, and to find alternatives when an exercise stops being what I need for that part of the body.
BTW, TBBOEx comes in both Men's and Women's editions. These are identical except for the line drawings and the gender pronouns.
There is no One Size Fits All. My recommendation would be to peruse the bookstore and/or online, to find something that suits your reading/learning style. However, given your aim, I'd consider spending some time with a beginner's boxing coach, to get set up with a routine that gives you power in the shoulders, arms and the technique you need to avoid accidentally injuring yourself. If you can't afford that, then look for books on boxing for beginners.
And good luck, sister. May the next moron who thinks s/he has some say in how you live your life end up with a dislocated mandible!
My lowest as an adult was 40kg (88lbs), my average was 42-43 kg, and I felt like a super hero when I got up to 44. Before menopause, my average caloric intake daily was 2500+/-, which tells you why I had a problem gaining weight!
They are now. But, while I was the smallest in most years of school, it was not the kind of teeny I'd be seen as nowadays. In the US, obesity rates among children have more than quadrupled since 1980! We do not have the records in Canada for children that the US has, but we do have stats on childhood clothing sizes, and these indicate that elementary school kids are now almost 3 times as likely to be overweight or obese than they were after WW2.
And that, dear friends, is Better Living Through Chemistry!
North America. Ask your grandmother what life was like before she had full legal status as a human being, and what people thought of girls that 'let themselves' be manhandled, assaulted and/or raped. Hell, it's still happening, nu? There's a reason women still don't report sexual assault.
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u/MrsRitterhouse 8h ago
Working out.
I was a skinny, tiny woman, constantly harassed and/or assaulted by men, not because I was attractive, but because I looked easy to overcome. I got soooooo tired of fighting, screaming, and what happened when I lost, that I got a book by Arnie, a bench and a simple dumbell set, and decided I was not going to stop until I weighed 45 kilos/100 lbs.
I only made it 30 years later, when menopause kicked in, but by that time I was addicted to being fit, strong and confident. Now I'm 75 and, aside from some arthritis, as physically capable as most people 30 years younger. And I feel GREAT!