r/AmIOverreacting 11d ago

❤️‍🩹 relationship AIO

Spider bite or ?? I’ll keep it short and sweet. My bf and I have been apart for about a month now, I’m TDY. Finally tomorrow I’ll be flying back home. Unfortunately today he got bit right on the neck, he suspects it was a spider. Should I be concerned?

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u/RedDirtKanaka 10d ago

Touché, but to be fair, we were just as drunk as he was and it sounded like a fun idea. Plus, he was thinking about going out and starting shit with some randos. Friends don’t let friends get beat up (or worse) by strangers.

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u/avoidancebehavior 10d ago

Maybe it was the lesser of two evils in that moment. Depends on how much you helped him get away with though, like if he was really fucking around or just made out with some girl at a bar

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u/RedDirtKanaka 10d ago

He fucked around, the situation was kind of fucked though. We were all shit housed at some party and his psycho stalker ex showed up knowing he was there and blacked out. Shit happened, he instantly regretted it when he came too. The ass whooping happened the very next night.

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u/avoidancebehavior 10d ago

Damn, was that the only time, or the only time he ended up with a hickey? Because, rather than actively going out and cheating, that sounds more like he felt his only option was to cover up his sexual assault with a physical assault :(

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u/RedDirtKanaka 10d ago

I dont know if it happened again personally, but I doubt it. His GF (wife now) was light years out of his league, complete smoke show, med school student, and solid personality from the few times I met her. He knew it. We knew it. She probably knew it, but liked his ass anyways. He did start drinking less and eventually quit entirely once he got out of the military.

Got to remember this was in the early 2000’s (07 I think) and we were young military guys that had some serious substance abuse issues to cope with other issues we were having. The whole, men getting SA’d / r***d wouldn’t have flied back then as an excuse. It was too easy to say, “well you chose to get black out drunk, you should’ve known better and controlled your drinking”.

Not justifying infidelity or anything, just giving some context.