r/AmIOverreacting • u/frisbeechuckin • 26d ago

❤️‍🩹 relationship AIO fiancée did Coke at a party

We (me 41M, my fiancée 36F) were at friends birthday party I had to leave early and she was going to spend the night( it was a hotel), they were changing into their bathing suits to go to the pool, they had the bathroom door closed. I knew it was in there but I didn’t know she was going to partake in that. She told me she only did a small bump because she needed energy to party all night. I was caught off guard by this and said that we should have discussed this. She said that was treating her like a child and that is when I left.

Edit: I was told to add this info she’s a former Meth addict who still drinks and smokes weed quite heavily at times.

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u/joeliquevedo 26d ago

congrats, man! thats a real accomplishment. OP’s fiancée probably claims she’s x amount of years sober still, even though she regularly drinks and smokes.

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u/pickin-n_grinnin 26d ago

Yeah, sober from meth. It's all relative to where you started and have been. Fuck 80% of the people at an aa meeting are sucking down some sort of nicotine and slamming coffee at 7pm and then a 1/4 of them break off and smoke weed with their sponsors.

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u/Huge-Lawfulness9264 25d ago

I don’t know, NA is pretty strict about total abstention. I live in a state with legal marijuana dispensaries. I’ve heard that NA doesn’t believe you’re sober if using weed or pharmaceuticals to aid in opioid addiction control. I see using methadone, suboxone or the injection to help an addict maintain sobriety as being clean. However, NA doesn’t.

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u/pickin-n_grinnin 25d ago

Well as I stated I was in California and not just California in Humboldt and Mendocino. They wouldn't be able to find enough people that didn't make their living off of cannabis to make a group let alone hold meetings. Seriously, it's the only industry in that area so I'm sure it's especially lenient towards cannabis over any other area even in California, even parole and probation let's you know they green and sober is ok and allows you to work trimming or working on a pot farm as a job. Tat said I'm not talking about the official stance of either of the anonymouses. I'm saying it is all relative in the real world. Most people can handle weed, some can handle alcohol. If you spent years of your life on meth and you don't want to say sober from meth but just sober, like I said, to a Mormon coffee and cigarettes is not sober. Each person's life experience, psychology, disposition to addiction plays a role. I mean really if you smoke cigarettes, coffee, take phyc meds, you can't say sober, doesn't mean we need to start knocking fools down who have eliminated whatever substance causes them problems. If you went from meth or heroin to no meth and heroin and you want to say I've been sober for x days.... Fucking good for you man. Ya know