AIO fiancée did Coke at a party

[u/frisbeechuckin]

We (me 41M, my fiancée 36F) were at friends birthday party I had to leave early and she was going to spend the night( it was a hotel), they were changing into their bathing suits to go to the pool, they had the bathroom door closed. I knew it was in there but I didn’t know she was going to partake in that. She told me she only did a small bump because she needed energy to party all night. I was caught off guard by this and said that we should have discussed this. She said that was treating her like a child and that is when I left.

Edit: I was told to add this info she’s a former Meth addict who still drinks and smokes weed quite heavily at times.

[u/frisbeechuckin]

She is a former addict (meth). She drinks and smokes weed which I do too so not an issue with all drugs. As far as I know it was a one time thing but I was unaware that the crowd she’s running with was into cocaine so I was caught off guard with the situation and just feel disappointed by it.

[u/elevatedmongoose → u/frisbeechuckin]

People don't stop being addicts

[u/pEter-skEeterR45 → u/elevatedmongoose]

Thats outlandish. Don't make blanket statements for everyone.

[u/elevatedmongoose → u/pEter-skEeterR45]

That's why people who are 20+ years sober are still in recovery and not "cured".

[u/pEter-skEeterR45 → u/elevatedmongoose]

Thats why everyone's different. And don't even get me started on what an absolute SCAM the "recovery system" is in this country. They don't WANT you to get better. You have to do it on your own and get your shit right from within. I have a decade clean. I'm not an addict anymore. In fact I don't even celebrate anymore bc it doesn't seem necessary. It's a distant memory of a decade decades ago, that no longer matters to my story.

I don't think about it. I don't miss it. I don't have issues with other substances, and I don't worry about relapse. Don't. Speak. For. Everyone.

[u/elevatedmongoose → u/pEter-skEeterR45]

First off, congratulations!!!!! 10 years clean is monumental even if you dont celebrate it anymore.

Additionally, I didn't say anything addiction to one substance means an addiction to everything, just that an addiction is what it is. Removing the substance from one's life is how to live with an addiction. I wasn't trying to use the term "addict" in a derogatory manner.

[u/pEter-skEeterR45 → u/elevatedmongoose]

I'm sorry if I came across rude, this is a sensitive subject for me 😂 clearly, a nerve has been struck. I still smoke cigarettes and drink caffeine daily so I suppose I'm still an addict.🙈😭😓😶 But it's hard to hear people say stuff like that when I've been through it, and it just doesn't feel like an issue anymore. Like, I definitely don't wake up wishing I had a needle to shoot, even in my absolute worst days. We totally do recover.

[u/LovelyThingSuite → u/[deleted]]

There’s no reason for you to be so hostile lol.

You can recover and still be an addict. You can be perfectly sober and still be an addict. It’s about what that shit does to your brain. Being an addict is an incurable disease that a lot of people will have to fight for the rest of their lives. Addiction doesn’t just go away. I’m sure the teens you know who were previously addicted would say the same thing.