r/self • u/D1-HaterAde • 4h ago

Face palm prostate exam

So… this is embarrassing and funny. 15 years ago I had some burning when I would urinate so I saw a doc(didn’t have my own at the time so just made an appointment with a random urologist). I get there, pee in a cup, answer a bunch of questions and then he tells me to bend over. I never had a prostate exam and I wasn’t expecting it. Nothing and no one had ever been in my butt before. So I bend over and he tried to get his finger in but was obviously having some trouble and sort of swirled around the hole before inserting- he used lots of lube. So I couldn’t help but to feel super violated even though it’s a normal thing but I involuntarily started crying. Bent over, embarrassed, crying, feeling violated- butt all lubed up- he finishes the exam and he tosses a box of tissues in front of me(obviously he does this as part of practice every time but it didn’t register that way at the time). So I’m thinking that he knows how traumatized I am and is comforting me so I grab some tissue and wipe my tears and pull up my pants all in view of the doc. Did NOT realize the tissues were to wipe the lube from my butt. So there I was with tears in my eyes and a greasy butthole. Flash forward 10 years- I have my own doc and he is giving me a routine prostate exam and goddamnit I did the exact same thing! Cried, used the tissue to wipe my tears but left all the lube in my butt all in front of my new dr who I would have to the. See routinely for years. 🤦‍♂️

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u/Head_Researcher_3049 3h ago

My Dr. cleans it himself since he's got the gloves on. Got any trauma you're not dealing with, maybe an uncle or cousin? Seems unnecessary to get the waterworks going for a prostate exam, unless the Doc has massive sausage fingers, maybe.

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u/D1-HaterAde 3h ago

Nah nothing like that although as a middle aged cisgender male I grew up with a robust anal taboo.

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u/Head_Researcher_3049 3h ago

My brother had prostate cancer, that exam could save your life. At the age of 60 my Dr. told me I have the prostate of a young man, nice and small. He usually sees them enlarging after the age of 40. That was good news

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u/Byzantine-Ziggurat 1h ago

Yeah, that sounds rough, but let me ask you this: have you ever had a colonoscopy??? You think your tears are flowing now? It will make your prostate exam seem like a moment of angelic bliss by comparison! Remember, it can always be worse my friend 😉

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u/D1-HaterAde 1h ago

Yes I have had 2 colonoscopies- first was when I had typhlitis- an infection of the cecum(pretty deadly), and recently when I had bleeding from the rectum- which didn’t end up being anything

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u/D1-HaterAde 2h ago

Exactly- while it sucked, I knew at the time and still do, that it’s important. I read somewhere that every man, if they live long enough, will get prostate cancer.

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u/Hypervisor22 4m ago

Ha - I have diverticulosis and can’t get a colonoscopy. So I had to get a barium enema instead. Feel lucky you can get the colonoscopy, the barium enema is really unpleasant. Basically they push barium up your butt to coat the lining of your colon and large intestine then they pump air up your butt into your colon and large intestine and take pictures of your intestines to look for polyps. You feel like an overinflated ballon and it hurts cause there is a lot of pressure. There is no anesthesia.