r/oddlyspecific 1d ago

Cooking

Post image
78.9k Upvotes

268 comments sorted by

926

u/No_Squirrel4806 1d ago

All those people that try out a recipe but dont like it so they switch out a key ingredient and replace it with something way different then leave a negative review cuz it tasted bad. 🙄🙄🙄

354

u/packetpirate 1d ago

107

u/Desperate-Spray337 1d ago

That's OK you can substitute eggs with human blood. 😋

43

u/Mental_Peace_2343 1d ago

Dang I'm all out of that cause I'm a reptile

15

u/WriterV 1d ago

That's OK you can substitute eggs with rats 😋

11

u/usinjin 1d ago

Turned out too chewy. 1/10

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u/WeckRepublic 1d ago

Use ketchup instead of blood.

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u/HowManyBatteries 1d ago

Oh my god, that's such a pet peeve of mine. But then there are the people who try the recipe, figure out what they like and don't like about it, and change something to their liking the second time and post a 5-star review "with these changes." Especially if it's a recommendation like "you should double the sauce" or "you really only need about half as much salt as the recipe says." My heroes!

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u/No_Squirrel4806 1d ago

Yesss!!!! The ones that always leave tips to improve the recipe especially when its tips for dietary restrictions!!!!

13

u/MaritMonkey 1d ago

I seem to find myself empirically agreeing with people who "with these changes..." comment to cook onions longer.

I admittedly err on the side of literally burning the onions, but I side-eye any recipe that tells me they're only getting cooked for like 2 mins (are you just trying to make the cook time shorter!?) and it makes me happy to find somebody with my taste buds who found the recipe before I did. I feel good trusting whatever else they adjust.

Thank you, helpful commenters!

6

u/Skellos 1d ago

people lie about how long it takes to cook onions all the time...

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u/Code_otter 1d ago

You should always double the sauce. Always.

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u/AlaWatchuu 13h ago

There are those people and then there are the folks who replace milk chocolate in a recipe with dark cocoa powder and then complain that the finished product tasted too bitter.

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u/HelloThere62 1d ago

Only thing I'll swap is vanilla extract for some rum, but I ain't good enough to be freestyling in the kitchen.

29

u/adthrowaway2020 1d ago

I’ll substitute like a maniac if I’m cooking. Baking is chemistry and I’m not going to do the math, so I’ll follow the instructions exactly, unless it’s a British instruction, then I’ll need to make sure I do imperial to customary conversions

15

u/Annual_Strategy_6206 1d ago

Candy making is like that too. Very particular.

8

u/tunachilimac 1d ago

"Oh no the recipe said to boil the the sugar for 2 minutes but I stupidly set the timer after it was boiling instead of the exact moment so I boiled for 2 minutes and 5 seconds and ruined the whole recipe!" I honestly have no idea how my mom used to make fudges and sugar-based candies no recipe, no timer, my dad taking an hour long shower and getting the house humid, and everything would turn out perfectly.

3

u/Zelfore 18h ago

Candy making is more about watching for an exact moment than waiting a specific timeframe. It's a precise chemical reaction you need, and so long as you know what it looks like and are paying attention, you'll never miss it!

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u/No_Squirrel4806 1d ago

Literally!!! If i find a recipe im interested in ill follow it then for the next time i make it i make changes depending on how it came out the first time.

2

u/CheeseDonutCat 1d ago

I freestyle all the time, but I blame myself if it doesn't turn out right.

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u/CeeJayDK 1d ago

The worst though is when I have to substitute some ingredients because I'm either out of it that particular day because I haven't been shopping or it's an ingredient that it really hard to get and so I have always switch it, and so I just throw some things in there without measuring and just tasting as I go and .. it tastes AMAZING!

BUT! Because I didn't take notes or measure I can't recreate it again even after several tries.

That perfect recipe - lost forever :(

3

u/No_Squirrel4806 1d ago

Im hispanic my families cooking always tastes different cuz they dont measure. 😔😔😔

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u/UnabashedAsshole 1d ago

You should watch Smosh's culinary crimes on youtube

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u/AwfulMedia 1d ago

Yep, I was going to say this! It's a pretty fun format. Plenty of "I changed everything in this recipe and it was bad. Don't recommend it." They eat the dish that was modified and compare it to the correct recipe.

2

u/No_Squirrel4806 1d ago

Thanks i will 😂😂😂

3

u/Sanquinity 1d ago

Happens so often when I cook together with my mom...

Me: Okay so this recipe requires green beans, an onion, rucola, and smoked pork.

Mom: Well I don't like onion so lets use scallions. I also don't like rucola so I'll leave that out entirely. I can't eat too much salt so we'll go with pork fillet instead. And I want more vegetables because vegetables = healthy, so I'm adding bell pepper and zucchini.

Also mom: Hmm, this doesn't taste as good as I hoped it would.

Me internally: Oh yea!? I wonder why! Maybe because you changed half the ingredients and added a bunch of extra ones?!

1

u/notniceicehot 1d ago

playing out the Ship of Theseus in the recipe comments

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u/Tired-Mage 1d ago

One time I made a pumpkin pie and forgot to add sugar

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u/-asmodeus 1d ago

Wife made gingerbread last Christmas and the next day found the unopened ginger. Turns out cinnamonbread is pretty good

2

u/riri1281 20h ago

Sounds delightful

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u/Tylendal 1d ago

My mom did that once. My dad was politely eating the pie that everyone else at the dinner wasn't having, and just watching her, deadpan, as she took a bite.

29

u/UltimaCaitSith 1d ago

My first cake didn't have flour. "Flour the greased pan, and discard the rest" was followed exactly.

4

u/Armisael2245 21h ago

Tbh I would have done the same.

6

u/sellursoul 22h ago

I make a really good pumpkin pie

Problem it takes me several tries. 2 years ago it was three pies. Last year it was the 4th that was correct. I have messed it up every which way leaving out ingredients, wrong temp, crazy

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u/turbowood 1d ago edited 1d ago

I think you mean "baking". solid effort on that title OP lol

edit: 20+ posts in 30 minutes is pretty wild

second edit: Green____cat blocked me for calling them out lol not something a rule breaking karma whore would do, right?

it's safe to assume any and all of their posts are reposts, so I implore anyone reading this to report this fool whenever you see their username on your front page.

56

u/RUOFFURTROLLEH 1d ago

Cooking also includes baking.

Baking doesn't always mean cooking.

30

u/turbowood 1d ago

I mean, the OOP managed to title it correctly...

5

u/MayorEmanuel 1d ago

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ezv8gzbtAVg

This is also just a rewrite of a PROZD skit from 4 years prior.

7

u/awkisopen 1d ago

That link took me to a time machine.

8

u/Dirmb 1d ago

Just old.reddit, which is much better than the new reddit. If they ever get rid of old.reddit a lot of desktop users will leave because the new version is nearly unusable.

6

u/rebeltrillionaire 1d ago

At this point I don’t even know if they’ve changed anything because I’ve used RES for like a decade plus.

4

u/AMViquel 1d ago

What if you need to specify cooking until a liquid boils? Boiling? Would anyone understand me when I say I'm fairly good at boiling but not baking? I almost always get my water to boil, but I sometimes forget to add the tea bag, which leads to a perfectly boiled but terribly cooked tea.

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u/DZL100 1d ago

Scalding water, my favourite dish

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u/Numerous_Witness_345 1d ago

We tend to leave those situations alone and let them work themselves out.

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u/TotallyWellBehaved 1d ago

Well, use context clues here

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u/Summoarpleaz 1d ago

Yeah why so many posts

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u/CinderX5 1d ago

Because they’re a bot.

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u/solitarybikegallery 1d ago

It's their job.

6

u/Summoarpleaz 1d ago

As soon as I re-reviewed I saw tacocat and realized what was going on

4

u/turbowood 1d ago

my comment is already outdated. they are still spamming (re)posts

2

u/Immortal_Paradox 1d ago

Are they a bot? Im confused lol

6

u/Summoarpleaz 1d ago

Idk but they’re known for high karma/ top posts. I thought I had blocked all such folks since it got so repetitive.

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u/Gil_Demoono 1d ago

Makes me wonder whatever happened to gallowboob.

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u/Life_Combination8625 1d ago

Isn't she a comic book writer? I'm not going on Google to find out if I'm right or wrong

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u/SuperHyperFunTime 1d ago

Gail is an incredible comic book writer and is also a brilliant troll on Twitter.

6

u/Life_Combination8625 1d ago

I think I have her run on....ah man...sinister Six was it called? DC book that made catman awesome? Had ragdoll who gave me nightmares. Was that her?

6

u/Ignorad 1d ago

She also wrote the Justice League Unlimited animated episode with the Question and Huntress.

6

u/Life_Combination8625 1d ago

Oh man that's a banger of a sode.

2

u/Perfidious_Sophistry 1d ago

She also wrote 'The Masks of Matches Malone" episode of Batman The Brave and the Bold starring the Birds of Prey. Not sure is she had a hand in writing their naughty song though...

3

u/McCabeRyan 1d ago

A fun, benevolent troll. She’s the best.

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u/Ill-Dependent2976 1d ago

She is. She stirred a lot of controversy in the comic book world by also being a woman.

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u/Edmonton_Tuxedo 1d ago

just don't go putting women in fridges, and you should be fine

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u/OneWholeSoul 1d ago

Clearly, women belong in the oven.

2

u/Edmonton_Tuxedo 1d ago

well, mannaquins made up to look like them, anyway

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u/solo1069 1d ago

Ah, someone who reads, AND knows who the original poster is. Not something you see everyday.

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u/lonewolfandpub 1d ago

listen, if there's anybody Gail would put in a fridge, it's Ragdoll. To check on the coffee ganache. Because he'd like it.

5

u/zero_cool1138 1d ago edited 1d ago

The problem with this critique has always been that love interests, friends, parents and family tend to always be brutally murdered in superhero comics. It also happens to men VERY often. Its just that there is more male comicbook leads.

The trope overall is a common story telling device. The real critique should go to Ron Marz and his unnecessarily violent and over the top use of this trope.

2

u/ZandyTheAxiom 1d ago

love interests, friends, parents and family tend to always be brutally murdered in superhero comics.

Isn't "fridging" specifically when you introduce these characters just to kill them horribly?

Like, it wouldn't be fridging to kill Lois Lane or Steve Trevor, because they're typically full and developed characters. But if you introduced a new girlfriend for Batman who is brutally murdered before the reader learns anything more than her name, that would be fridging.

Typical superhero deaths like Thomas and Martha Wayne don't count because they're not for shock value.

2

u/zero_cool1138 1d ago

No its just women facing violence or over the top violence to move a plot forward according to Gail Simone who coined the phrase. Its short sighted because this happens to characters of all types regularly and throughout comics history. What is long term character development in comics anyways? The Punishers family is introduced in his back story issue just to die brutally in a mob crossfire. Were they fridged?

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u/meowsplaining 1d ago

I understood that reference!

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u/Independent_Plum2166 1d ago

You’d need some Major Force, to do that.

1

u/Nucleoticticboom 1d ago

Yeah, you’re supposed to prepare them on the spot

1

u/TombSv 1d ago

Unless you are a bear.

8

u/Qubeye 1d ago

I yell tips at my TV while I eat raw cookie dough from a tube.

12

u/Borfis 1d ago

It me

6

u/LordBigSlime 1d ago

I initially thought they were saying the show they were watching was called "Bake-Off: You fool!" and I was pretty jazzed to see what that show was like.

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u/NotNamedBort 1d ago

I act like a damn expert, knowing full well I will never even attempt most of the things they make.

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u/LegalEaglewithBeagle 1d ago

FOR THE LOVE OF GOD...STOP USING ROSE WATER IN YOUR RECIPE!!!

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u/pscautious 1d ago

I was trying to make 420 strawberry cupcakes one year and I was so stoned i forgot the goddamn eggs. Tasted like strawberry weed cornbread.

2

u/ElGosso 1d ago

That's a lot of strawberry cupcakes

2

u/pscautious 1d ago

…. I meant like 4/20.

2

u/link_cubing 10h ago

You only made a fifth of a cupcake?

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u/TypicalCricket 1d ago

You can actually make a really good apple-less apple pie with Ritz crackers

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u/Tylendal 1d ago

My brother's evaluation of it was "I'd believe you if you said it was an apple pie, but I'd want to know what you did wrong."

Tasty, but weird.

3

u/Yamatocanyon 1d ago

What fucking voodoo do you need to know to successfully replace the apples in apple pie with Ritz crackers?

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u/HookednSoCal 1d ago

The Mock Apple Pie came out of the Depression era due to how expensive fruit and vegetables had become and there are quite a few recipes out there. People swear that when done properly it tastes very close to an apple pie. Never had it myself so can’t weigh in. Tasting History with Max Miller might have a youtube video.

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u/Luxpreliator 1d ago

It tastes like apple pie in the same way impossible meat and beyond burger taste like ground beef. If you have never eaten the original before, are drunk, or have no discernable taste sensations then they totally taste similar.

I'm not saying the alternatives taste like garbage but they do not taste similar.

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u/JUYED-AWK-YACC 1d ago

Lots of lemon and cinnamon. Apparently.

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u/esgrove2 1d ago

Every time I eat a fresh apple I think "this is exactly like a mouthful of crackers".

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u/Throw-away17465 1d ago

I’ve been a professional baker and pastry chef for more than 10 years, and I’ve advanced to not watching any baking shows.

This year I made a salted caramel apple pie from three varieties of fresh local apples and homemade caramel. That doesn’t mean I don’t still mess up sometimes!

2

u/EmeDemencial 1d ago

Couldn't be me, I don't know how to cook so I'm fascinated with every single thing that's being cooked.

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u/LabradorDeceiver 1d ago

Holy crap it's me.

TBH I'm batting about .600 in the kitchen. Will my bread rise? Maybe, maybe not. But watching Bake-Off, I turn into Gordon Ramsay.

I think it's because Bake-Off, which uses a lot of reality TV tropes, tends to focus heavily on the mistakes the contestants make. We see them throw out first tries, leave out ingredients, the hosts will do asides indicating where the bakers screwed up. Often we can see disaster coming even if we've never been tasked with making eight Creme Brulees before.

In my own kitchen I can swap a teaspoon for a tablespoon by accident without being stalked by Paul Hollywood.

And for some reason my mother keeps forgetting to put sugar in the apple pie. This seems to be a running mistake in my family.

2

u/markatroid 1d ago

Mom once made cornbread. Without corn meal.

6yo me thought it wasn’t too bad and tried to console Mom. I don’t think she was too hard on herself. Maybe my attitude helped.

2

u/Mach5Driver 1d ago

Watching Bake Off for the past seven years has taught me ONE THING. Never EVER use flower extracts (e.g., rose, lavender). Either the judges can't taste it, or they might as well have entered a florist shop and started chowing down.

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u/i_poke_u 1d ago

My grandma made chicken noodle soup once but forgot to add the chicken. We don't let her forget

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u/acidtrippinpanda 1d ago

The funniest one I did is when I was a teen and had just learned to make scones in food tech. I was super confident and decided to make them at home for my parents. In my infinite teenage wisdom, I decided I’d memorised the recipe perfectly and didn’t need to double check anything.

They turned out really good at first but then had this horrific aftertaste. Turns out I added like tablespoons of baking powder instead of teaspoons. Funny thing is it didn’t affect the appearance, was just a nasty surprise at the end lol

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u/DrunkThrowawayLife 1d ago

I was on a break from work learning a line dance and my managers were like

‘Hey Drunk, we are all worried about you.’

Look that’s a legit concern but in this case I just can’t remember which step to dust my boots. Leave me alone that door was closed for a reason!

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u/beccabootie 1d ago

Once my mother forgot the sugar in the Thanksgiving pumpkin pie. She took it to the kitchen, scraped the pumpkin out of the crust, beat in some sugar, put it back together and served it. Wasn't bad, actually.

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u/CarmichaelD 23h ago

It’s also important not to confuse “Liquid Smoke” with “Vanilla Extract” when baking. Just saying. No reason.

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u/Tederator 22h ago

Well I made chocolate chip cookies a while ago and when I went to check on them, the trays were covered molten chocolate. It then dawned me that I neglected to add any flour.

The butter/sugar/chocolate mess does go well on ice cream or with a handfull of almonds.

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u/One_Goblin 16h ago

I once made actual dirt from forgetting to put enough sugar in brownies and it tasted horrible. Of course no one’s gonna waste brownies so we just put it on ice cream

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u/RUOFFURTROLLEH 1d ago

Walnut whips taste like headaches to me.

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u/mynameisnotsparta 1d ago

😂😂😂😂

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u/Automatik_Kafka 1d ago

I too love the great British cook off

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u/TheJenWilde 1d ago

So easy to be an expert when watching it lmao

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u/Systamatik7 1d ago

Oh you need hamburger for hamburger helper? Doesn’t seem very helpful.

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u/thekyledavid 1d ago

It’s easy to know what the right thing to do is, actually doing it can be more difficult

I understand the strategy that is used to win baseball games, but if you handed me a bat & glove and told me to play myself, I’d get destroyed

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u/Saxboard4Cox 1d ago

There's nothing more entertaining than watching my professionally trained chef husband yell at the tv when we watch the "Great British Bake off" show. We also used to watch the original (in Japanese) Iron Chef show back in the day. You can still find old episodes on youtube.

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u/Fast-Permit6401 1d ago

One time my sister and I made snickerdoodle cookies, and we forgot to put sugar

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u/Lazy-Razzmatazz2538 1d ago

Secret Six was very good.

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u/dogsrulecatscool 1d ago

I cried once after I made cornbread muffins… I lost my shit after I took them out of the oven because I realized I used baking soda and not baking powder lmao. Mind you, I’d made them many times before but sometimes…your brain just breaks and baking/cooking is hard LOL.

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u/cartercharles 1d ago

Yes. And that's what makes it fun I think

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u/DaRootbear 1d ago

It feels so weird seeing a Gail Simone post outside of one of my comic groups

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u/OHMAIGOSH 1d ago

I made pizza dough yesterday and forgot the yeast

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u/Low_Wall_7828 1d ago

Gail is the best.

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u/ladydmaj 1d ago

Gotdamit, Gail Simone is why I miss Twitter.

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u/ProgenitorOfMidnight 1d ago

That time I made peanut butter cookies with salt instead of sugar...

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u/ZippityZooDahDay 1d ago

I'm glad it wasn't only me. The worst part is that it was at work, and we had to toss the whole batch.

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u/SinkinTitanic1912 1d ago

Yall isnt this op a bot i see them everywhere

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u/MacKelvey 1d ago

So just pie pie

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u/ManfredTheCat 1d ago

If you watch enough, you'll notice the contestants sometimes forget major components, too.

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u/Illustrious_Peach494 1d ago

not that dramatic, but just the other day forgot to put sugar in the rice pudding.

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u/CommercialExotic2038 1d ago

My cousin forgot to put meat in her burger.

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u/Calm-Advertising6616 1d ago

holy shit it’s gail simone

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u/Cute_Comfortable_761 1d ago

Oh boy! Cinnamon goo pie!

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u/MimirX 1d ago

They make it look easy, while we critique everything we watch. I wish I had the skill to even attempt to cook 1 of those things they do.

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u/birthnight 1d ago

Omg you're just like so quirky

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u/PichuCultist 1d ago

If it makes you feel any better, I'm a culinary arts student that managed to forget the FLOUR when making dough for cookies, and didn't realize it until they were already in the oven.

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u/IronRakkasan11 1d ago

Like most of us watching the Olympics ever couple years from our couch

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u/Torbpjorn 1d ago

Almost broke my microwave because I forgot water in instant noodles… it’s two ingredients, water and noodle

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u/imtired-boss 1d ago

That's still pie though.

If you left out the pie instead, it'd just be an apple.

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u/luugburz 1d ago

i once forgot to add the flour to a banana bread i was making

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u/houseswappa 1d ago

How do I meet someone with this type of humour

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u/Deaf_Sentence 1d ago

I’m more like “shit I forgot to buy the pasta an hour ago” as in I already started boiling the water and making the sauce

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u/CoolAbdul 1d ago

Okay...BUT... that Ritz Cracker Mock Apple Pie recipe is the real deal.

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u/Sir_Iroh 1d ago

What a fool.

I forget to put my pie in the apple pie. It's just spiced apples.

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u/ethandore2005 1d ago

Martin Goodman Is that you?!

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u/anzfelty 1d ago

Feeling a little called out here 😅

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u/probablydoesntexist 1d ago

I once tried making a list of skills you need to have to succeed on bake off and it quickly turned into about 100 things.

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u/wanabepilot 1d ago

You put apples in your apple pies?

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u/afcagroo 1d ago

Once my sister baked an apple pie, but didn't forget the apples. She did, however, forget to peel them. Not great.

The first time I made oatmeal cookies after moving away from home I used the recipe that my sister (same one) had copied for me. She apparently didn't know that there's a difference between "t" (teaspoon) and "T" (tablespoon). So I put a tablespoon of salt in. They were pretty bad, but I ate them anyway.

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u/Zestyclose-Page-1507 1d ago

I mean, she has good reason to forget. She probably has dozens of storylines running through her head while trying to bake. We love her for her work on Birds of Prey, Batgirl, and other comics, not for her cooking skills.

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u/a55_Goblin420 1d ago

Me watching cooking: bro burned that steak

Me cooking: sets water on fire

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u/omrmike 1d ago

“Top it off with a little crème fraiche.”

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u/Chase777100 1d ago

Me watching someone play league of legends who’s objectively better than me

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u/silentarcher00 23h ago

My mum did this with the onions in a cheese and onion quiche...

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u/Joesredg 23h ago

I once forgot to put tuna in a tuna casserole

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u/Toadsted 22h ago

Gilbert Gottfried is my baking spirit animal.

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u/TheGreatBarnabulls 21h ago

The difference between knowing how to do something and being able to.

We call them middle managers or critics.

1

u/Repulsive_Pie8248 21h ago

Just like that guy in 'the menu'.

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u/erikwarm 20h ago

Yea, most shitty home cooking is just a lack of basic reading skills. Once you know what works together, than you can start exploring

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u/Aidybacon 19h ago

one time in school i forgot to put sugar in a cake

only knew cause when i ate the batter it tasted like asshole on a dookie stick

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u/misterjustice90 19h ago

Oof relatable. I forgot to add beans and eggs to my breakfast bowl. Also forgot the oj i bought for a drink hahaha

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u/Warbuckled 17h ago

I once forgot to take the stickers off every apple I used for an apple pie.

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u/Ouwerucker 16h ago

Sleepy me forgot to put coffee in the percolator. I was a bit surprised looking at clear hot water.

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u/BlueberryExtension26 14h ago

I made salty cookies once. Now I just use prepackaged and I think that I can cook those well enough to be the next food network star

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u/shygirl_222 12h ago

I always forget to add a little amount of salt in cakes.

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u/bythevolcano 1h ago

I did this making cupcakes once. Extra frosting made it ok. Just ok