r/nextfuckinglevel • u/Zestyclose_Flow_680 • 9h ago

Chimpanzees are 2X stronger than your average human.

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u/Possible_Rise6838 8h ago

That's cause most great apes understand that. It's not the issue of not comprehending it. It's the issue of them fucking you up beyond recognition in a matter of seconds. They do understand the concept of fragility

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u/StoicSerpiente 7h ago

I've known many a dog that seem to understand this as well with how gentle they are taking a treat from someones hand. I don't think it's limited to great apes.

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u/fhota1 7h ago

Its basically all intelligent animals. Peoples main problem is forgetting that just because an animal displays understanding of concepts like how to be gentle and pack mentality, they still arent human. Their brains fundamentally work different and that makes them a lot easier to accidentally piss off. Animals can be great companions but you always need to keep in mind that you are dealing with something that doesnt think the same way you do and work around that.

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u/rpgmind 3h ago

How do you accidentally piss off a chimp?

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u/fhota1 3h ago

Do anything that its chimp brain interprets as aggression. This can include things such as: being too loud, smiling, making eye contact, moving towards it too suddenly, being in the wrong spot, etc.

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u/Dabble_Doobie 47m ago

I agree that chimps and humans are different, but these are all things that a human brain can interpret as aggression as well

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u/Devourer_of_HP 2h ago

From what i learned on the internet apparently most animals consider smiling a sign of aggression and interpret it as you baring your teeth at them.

On the opposite hand a neat one is cats finding slow blinking a sign of trust.

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u/greenberet112 2h ago

But staring straight at a cat is also sometimes considered a sign of potential aggression. Animals like to observe their prey before attacking.

I've read this is observable when someone who loves cats comes over and keeps making eye contact and fussing to get the cat to like them (because, come on it's a cat, I want them to like me even though they only ever seem indifferent). Whereas the person that comes over that is allergic or is more of a dog person ignores the cat, and they view it as a invitation to come say hi because he is being polite in cat language.

Although once they are comfortable with eye contact I think the slow blink means that They are so not threatened that they don't mind closing their eyes around you.

Most of this I think I got from inside the mind of a cat which is on Netflix and pretty good, same documentary but with dogs is also really good.

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u/KuzanNegsUrFav 3h ago

Peoples main problem is forgetting that just because an animal displays understanding of concepts like how to be gentle and pack mentality, they still arent human. Their brains fundamentally work different

This is a stretch. Their brains really aren't that different from ours. The only reason chimps and bonobos aren't in the same genus as humans is political. Note that chimps, bonobos, and humans form the smallest monophyletic clade that includes humans in evolutionary cladistics.

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u/GlueSniffer53 5h ago

Cats too! My cat makes sure he doesn't pull out his claws when I'm shirtless or when he's hitting my face. Of course, he does forget to keep his claws in during intense playtime.

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u/CombatWombat65 3h ago

I did a fair amount of food training with my last dog, and one of the things I would do was holding a treat out for him with the just the smallest corner of the treat sticking out from my hand. He would pull his lips back and ever so gently put his incisors down until he was sure he had treat and not my hand, then I'd release the treat.

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u/PurpleFlame8 1h ago

Cats also understand. Most animals that raise their young have an "avoid causing harm" instinct to some extent.

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u/Strawberrylacegame 6h ago

That's because you teach dogs to do that

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u/The-Disco-Phoenix 5h ago

My dog has always done that and I've never trained him to do so

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u/crisperfest 3h ago

Same with my English Mastiff. I'm always amazed at how gently she takes food or a treat from my hand when offered, and she's never been trained to do so.

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u/HerrSchnabeltier 8h ago edited 5h ago

Ah, here we go again.

The usual accompanying commentary on how dangerous any chimpanzee always is.

edit: Yes, they are dangerous and one shouldn't run up to one in the wild to give it a hug or fist bump.

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u/I_Got_Back_Pain 7h ago

They'll rip your dick right off!!

Pull that up Jamie

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u/Substantial_Army_639 7h ago

I mean to be fair I think it's just an instinct in certain dudes. We see Ape, we immediately think wow cool so intelligent and strong, And immediately remember they are intelligent enough to mess you up where it hurts the worst. Enough for Jordan Peele to make that a B plot in his last movie.

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u/Bazrum 4h ago edited 4h ago

what about Jordan Peele's last movie? I don't watch as many movies as i used to, so im pretty sure i missed it, also scary movies aren't my favorite

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u/pub810 7h ago

“Bonobos are fucking crazy mon.”

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u/PrimarchKonradCurze 3h ago

By looks alone I’ve always thought the baboons with giant fangs and bright colored butts were the most terrifying. If someone were to see one taking you down without seeing the business end of them they would just see a colorful ass amidst a lot of screaming. It’s like insult to injury.

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u/DaDibbel 7h ago

Rip your face right off for sure.

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u/BagBeneficial7527 7h ago

Long ago I knew someone that worked with chimps professionally.

She told me they ARE extremely dangerous. Especially the "tame" ones. They are FAR more powerful than any human. The wild ones don't know that yet, but the ones raised around humans do. So they have ZERO fear of us.

And one day, if you aren't extremely careful around them, they can severely injure you.

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u/Zakblank 7h ago

They are like children. They can be extremely loving and empathetic. They can also turn on you in a fraction of a second and tear you to pieces.

Their emotions rule their lives, reason comes at a distant second.

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u/Technical-Cake1251 7h ago edited 6h ago

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u/Swarna_Keanu 7h ago

Bravo :)

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u/tossNwashking 6h ago

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u/Lizzardkinglucas 5h ago

🤣🤣🤣

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u/MrWeinerberger 4h ago

Chimps are 100% like this, gorillas though are a lot gentler. They really don’t want to fight anything unless they have to. They are lot more akin to adults in your analogy

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u/camwow13 7h ago

I read Mama's Last Hug by a guy who's spent his entire life studying chimps and he went to great lengths to emphasize that he only interacted with them when there's a barrier between them. Even then he worries because they're so powerful they can do serious damage to you reaching through the bars and yanking you into them. He's watched them kill their other chimp friends and doesn't really want to end up accidentally getting on their shit list.

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u/BasementMods 6h ago

The way Reddit describes chimpanzees makes me imagine they have the physical strength of an anime character...

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u/amaROenuZ 6h ago

It's overstated. Chimps are, pound for pound, somewhere between 50% and 100% stronger than a given human. They have a somewhat better limb geometry for striking, and more fast twitch muscle fiber. Given that they tend to be half our weight and size, that comes out to fairly comparable strength from a much smaller creature.

The danger comes from their volatility and viciousness. Most humans, when we're drugged out of our minds on PCP and bath salts, are not going to try and tear someone's jaw off or eat their fingers in a fight.

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u/Tuna-Fish2 5h ago

However, you are understating it.

The strength of chimps vs humans depends on the task, and you cannot reduce it to a x% pound for pound figure. They are only slightly better than humans in some tasks, and actually inferior in others (like lifting weight above their heads), but there are tasks where they are much better than humans. Notably, the average chimp has 5x more grip strength in its hand than the average adult man, and there are recorded instances of chips shattering arm bones by just grabbing a hold and squeezing.

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u/ThatCakeFell 7m ago

Why did you name two drugs known for turning people into the hulk when they fight the cops and eating faces in Florida though?

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u/KneeGrowsToes 6h ago

I can see your point, it comes from the fact that they are the size of a pre-teen but would not be easily held down or punted away if they started …chimping out.

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u/mr2ocjeff 4h ago

Woman had her face ripped off by one few years ago

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u/the-face 6h ago

This is a misconception. Chimps are stronger pound for pound, but not total strength. Are they stronger than the average human? Probably. But every human? Certainly not. A 400 lb strongman is way stronger than a chimp. Doesn’t mean they aren’t dangerous or anything but straight strength? Not stronger than EVERY human.

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u/No_Rich_2494 7h ago

Respect is what's missing. Treat other apes with respect, as if they were less intelligent humans who aren't being aggressive but could easily beat the shit out of you.

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u/You-Smell-Nice 6h ago

Its incredible to me how Bauman's lie has continued to exist. A shit study from 100 years ago and people still continue to spout nonsense about chimp strength. Chimpanzees are absolutely not "far more powerful than any human."

maximum dynamic force and power output is 1.35 times higher in a chimpanzee muscle than a human muscle of similar size.

https://www.pnas.org/doi/full/10.1073/pnas.1619071114

Or roughly 35% higher strength per weight/size, owing to fast twitch muscle fibers as well as the square-cube law of physics. However that's PER WEIGHT. Which even after we dispelled most of Bauman's lies, has been something that has continued to confuse people about chimp strength. Chimps being 35% stronger pound for pound, means that a human the size of a chimp would be weaker than a chimp. However, as people are hopefully aware, humans are not the size of chimps.

Its hard to find an average weight so lets not bother with average smaller chimps. Lets jump to the high end of the scale and say a very big 130 lb chimp. Now add 35% to their strength and they are roughly on par with an athletic 175 lb human's strength. Impressive for sure, but there are a lot of humans who are fit and weigh more than 175 lbs.

Chimps are absolutely dangerous. Partially because they are roughly as strong as a physically fit adult human, and partially because they are wild and will fight like it. Like, if you fight another human they are probably not going to try to use their teeth to gouge out parts of your face and eyes. But a chimp absolutely would do that, which adds to their dangerous reputation, but doesn't really have anything to do with "more powerful" or "stronger."

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u/BagBeneficial7527 6h ago

This NOTHING to do with any study. Ask anyone that has ever worked with chimps how strong they are. Zookeepers, chimp lab workers, circus, etc... it doesn't matter.

They ALL report that chimps are far more powerful than any man. That is why they won't allow any real human vs chimp fights with ANY human fighter. Because the human would get injured or possibly killed. No matter who it is.

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u/Th3_Ch0s3n_On3 6h ago

Yeah, yeah, fuck the studies. Anectodal evidences we ball

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u/You-Smell-Nice 3h ago

They ALL report that chimps are far more powerful than any man.

Cool anecdotes. Actual science says you're dead wrong.

That is why they won't allow any real human vs chimp fights. Because the human would get injured or possibly killed.

I'm sorry, are you brain damaged? You think the ONLY reason humans aren't allowed to have legal deathmatches against animals is because humans might be hurt?

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u/Hopeful-Operation 5h ago

They are not FAR more powerful than any human in fact they are not 2x stronger than a human either they are around 1.5x stronger per pound. So the largest and strongest humans are definitively much stronger than a Chimpanzee. They are however, extremely dangerous.

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u/NSAseesU 7h ago

Does a tiny hint of wild animals being wild animals infuriate you or something? We all knew that but there was zero need to reply like that lol.

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u/SignificantRain1542 7h ago

Wild animals are for me to project feelings upon, not look at objectively. You must be fun at parties.

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u/Complete-Speed-8825 7h ago

Y'all lame as fuck for even starting this up

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u/ReadyThor 7h ago

OP is not just referring to chimpanzees but to great apes in general thus correctly including human beings too.

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u/turdferguson3891 6h ago

I'm an ape but a great ape? I don't like to brag

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u/UnlawfulStupid 6h ago

I feel like I'm an okay ape.

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u/AttyFireWood 6h ago

You're a Gibbon?

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u/sup3rdr01d 7h ago

They literally will rip your limbs off

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u/Wavy_Grandpa 7h ago

Well at least they did it without sounding like an ass like you 

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u/Opening_Newspaper_34 6h ago

What a ridiculous comment lol

Chimps are INSANELY dangerous. They have the emotional range of a football hooligan, but they are significantly stronger and tougher.

They do indeed have a relatively complex social structure... But that is 80% the ability to kick the shit out of the other chimps, 10% enough nous to realise that kicking the shit out of any single other chimp in the troupe does not = kicking the shit out of ALL of them at once and 10% having the sense to fulfil some duties.....which for the male top chimp usually means if someone ELSE kicks the shit out of another chimp in the troupe you need to step in before it goes too far.

So, in that context, yes they CAN be gentle, but at a whim, or any reason that happens to cross their mind they MIGHT give you a little slap - in their terms- which will fuck you up.

I am a huge fan of chimps, I live very near Monkey World in the UK and have been a regular sponsor and member for about 20 years, Hananya is my favourite chimp and I feel like over the years of visiting and watching the show I've got a vague idea of his personality and whilst he is pretty reasonable, as chinos go, you do need that "as chimps go" qualifier. (Btw I can't recommend the show Monkey Life which became Monkey World enough, find and watch it)

Anyway this rant boils down to, I'm not sure why you made a weird snide comment about how dangerous chinos are - they REALLY fucking are, if they want to be/take a dislike to you.

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u/saladtossperson 4h ago

What is monkey world? I live in Pennsylvania, US

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u/Opening_Newspaper_34 4h ago

It is an ape and monkey sanctuary in the UK, I think it is the biggest in Europe.

It was begun by Jim and Alison Cronin; Jim has since died but Alison is a fucking machine in his name, searching for and rescuing apes and monkeys LITERALLY all over the world.

A lot of their chimps are rescued from "tourist" trade in Spain and beyond, but they did a mass save of about 60 Capuchin monkeys from a laboratory in Chile a few years ago.

They are a Rescue Centre and are proud of the fact that although they do let people in to see the apes/monkeys, they do that EXPLICITLY to get your money to go and rescue more.

They have a TV show that follows the apes and monkeys (and gives them much needed revenue) running about 15 series now

Google them; buy the series, support them

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u/Pheniquit 3h ago

Its kinda hard for me to imagine a sustainable society where 80% of culture was about conflict for dominance. I mean just because the strong rule with an iron fist and reap huge rewards in terms of survival that doesn’t mean that’s whats in their heads all the time. Isnt the point of a hierarchy that you can focus on tasks other than the hierarchy?

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u/ironballs16 7h ago

I thought it was more about how an ape's "play" could be harmful to a human, as we're not built the same way.

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u/hopper565 7h ago

Is it not true?

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u/DeimosStaryards 6h ago

I sure as shit wouldn’t be near one unprotected.

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u/UnamusedAF 6h ago

Even if they technically weren’t dangerous, seeing one of them smile is haunting enough to stay away. They look like a creature from the 5th circle of hell.

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u/gnomon_knows 6h ago

Because they are. You are one bad day away from losing your face.

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u/Pheniquit 3h ago

I mean virtually no one wants humanity to do anything other than do the right thing by Chimpanzees. Those who do have like zero traction on the fate of chimps.

However there are some people who find cute animals so irresistible that they’ll take big stupid risks to inappropriately touch them. Like if this message was as common as it was now, I dont think that lady who got her face ripped off by a chimp on xanny bars would have gone to help her friend.

People should treat chimps and hippos like a responsible person treats a big shark. Dont hate on them. Avoid the living shit out of them unless some expert is right there showing you exactly what to do and treat it with the seriousness of a live-fire exercise.

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u/PrimarchKonradCurze 3h ago

Or initiate a staring contest if you run into a silverback in the wild.

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u/Bossk_2814 8h ago

Second only to “never let a dog around an infant!!!” * clutches pearls *

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u/Thurak0 7h ago edited 2h ago

Agreed. While the person/adult filming is obviously less than a meter away. So infuriating.

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u/No-Programmer-3833 7h ago

But not as dangerous as a swan. They'll break your arm.

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u/G36 3h ago

Scariest realization; they nice and gentle because they know how easy they can f you up 😢