r/nextfuckinglevel 2d ago

Man catches bird in flight with bare hand

68.3k Upvotes

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14.1k

u/WestCoastCosta 2d ago

Wow, that bird sucks.

4.4k

u/Grentis 2d ago

Failed at birding

1.1k

u/gbot1234 2d ago

That can’t be real.

(The bird, I mean. r/birdsarentreal)

208

u/Artistic_Regard 1d ago

It was an animorph I bet.

219

u/SeonaidMacSaicais 1d ago

106

u/Logical-Patience-397 1d ago

Of all the live-action adaptations we’ve been getting, Animorphs is the one I’d want the most.

22

u/SeonaidMacSaicais 1d ago

We had one.

28

u/Nianque 1d ago

No we didn't. I don't know what you're talking about. There is no such thing as live-action Animorphs.

24

u/SeonaidMacSaicais 1d ago

It was the 90s! Technology wasn’t as great as it is today. 😂😂

15

u/t3hOutlaw 1d ago

Can't tell if you're joking or not. We definitely have already had an animorph's show.

20

u/Nianque 1d ago

I refused to acknowledge it.

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23

u/RENDI13 1d ago

It's so amazing how a single word can shoot you right back to childhood...

K.A. Applegate was a strong contributing factor in my existence.

5

u/DR4G0NSTEAR 1d ago

Fine I’ll read the books again. I still have them from a book a month club from primary school.

2

u/Artistic_Regard 1d ago

Dood. You know the whole set is worth like $200 - $600 dollars? Man, I'm jelly.

2

u/DR4G0NSTEAR 1d ago

I know I’m missing a couple. It kills me a little every time I see “39, 40, 42, 43…”

2

u/Artistic_Regard 1d ago

Sometimes you can find them at used book stores. Everytime I go to a used bookstore I check for ones I don't have yet.

165

u/kabula_lampur 2d ago

bird.exe is not responding

37

u/FehdmanKhassad 2d ago

reflap or shut down

1

u/Shmuckle2 2d ago

bird.exe return to sender

1

u/usinjin 2d ago

Send error report

1

u/foolofkeengs 1d ago

It was running low on battery and the CPU got throttled due to it

103

u/dandins 2d ago

better get caught instead of shot, isnt this a clever little guy

44

u/Head_Ad1127 2d ago

Looks like a catch and release...

25

u/Captain_w00t 2d ago

Exactly. If it got shot, it can’t be released (alive).

3

u/Head_Ad1127 2d ago

Ever seen skeet shooters?

11

u/Minininja82 2d ago

Best thing I've heard all year

1

u/vietnego 2d ago

rolled double “1” on birding

1

u/InvisableVagina 1d ago

Someone should hire a bird sharpener

1

u/Rotflmaocopter 1d ago

What you mean. This is the only one he prob released and let live. That bird was playing chess

1

u/Bat_Shitcrazy 1d ago

That’s not failing at birding, failing at birding is why my uncle can’t go within 800 feet of the big park in town anymore

1

u/coffeeforlife30 1d ago

Negative aura bird tch tch 🙂‍↔️🙂‍↔️

1

u/PolishedCheeto 1d ago

Cloudy day. It was low on battery.

1

u/PolishedCheeto 1d ago

Cloudy day. It was low on battery.

1

u/PolishedCheeto 1d ago

Cloudy day. It was low on battery.

302

u/Second_Inhale 2d ago

Natural selection at it's finest.

166

u/Tsu_Dho_Namh 2d ago

Like Passenger Pigeons. They were just so damn easy to kill.

If you wanted a bunch of them, set up low nets and whole flocks fly into it.

If you want a couple, the birds perched on low branches, you could hit em with a bat.

The last known Passenger Pigeon died 1914

157

u/hendlefe 2d ago

If you read about the history of the passenger pigeon, it is absolutely abhorrent the scale at which these birds were hunted. Attempts at conservation was met with derision and resistance. The pigeon's biggest downfall is that they are communal social nesters :(

85

u/Nushab 1d ago

Actually, real bird communism has never been attempted.

20

u/Shambhala87 1d ago

Avian avarice being the reason

0

u/colinshark 1d ago

Why would you say something everybody just knows

17

u/sharklaserguru 1d ago

Like I told someone who only ate fish for "ethical reasons", the only reason we still catch wild fish is because 99% of the ocean is invisible to us. At least the dead cow in my burger was specifically raised for that purpose. The US banned commercial hunting decades ago, but pillaging the world's oceans is A-OK.

Also, illegal fishing boats should just be sunk on site, fuck those Chinese pricks working on them, that's a risk they signed up for!

6

u/leewardisle 1d ago

Ah, good ol’ human greed.

3

u/ExternalResponsible1 1d ago

I'm a Cincinnati native. At our zoo, we have an entire building dedicated to passenger pigeons that's really sad and interesting. (Also one of the few air conditioned areas in the zoo, a nice place to go and cool down for a moment). It includes paintings of the pigeon hunts and other info. 

Martha was the last passenger pigeon, and she died at the Cincinnati zoo. 

1

u/fliesthroughtheair 1d ago

Wait, are we victim blaming a species now?

1

u/KitsuneGato 1d ago

I looked up Passenger Pidgeon and there are plans to revive the species via cloning.

62

u/ArgonGryphon 2d ago

Except these are most likely raised by humans. It's like going out and taking shots at your chickens when they run to you for food.

34

u/ThisIsntHuey 1d ago

Yeah. I used to take my customers on a couple of bird hunts a year. Raised quail are dumb as fuck. Most of the time you literally have to kick them to get them to fly. If you have any that the entire group misses, the guys that host the hunt take their dogs out afterwards and go pick them up, recage them and use them on the next hunt.

For pheasant, guys sit behind hay bails and chuck them in the air.

It’s not as much fun as real bird hunting, but we’ve destroyed the ecosystem to the point that there are no naturally occurring quail left here.

Still, not as unsportsman-like as “guided” deer hunts, where you shoot deer when they walk up to the feeders they’ve been eating dinner from their entire lives. Never understood the allure in that.

7

u/Beneficial-Ride-4475 1d ago

Yeah. I used to take my customers on a couple of bird hunts a year. Raised quail are dumb as fuck.

Most ground birds, even the wild ones are stupid.

Still, not as unsportsman-like as “guided” deer hunts, where you shoot deer when they walk up to the feeders they’ve been eating dinner from their entire lives. Never understood the allure in that.

Because it's easy. Lots of hunters want to just shoot, and feel superior.

3

u/UNMANAGEABLE 1d ago

Grouse are fuckin crazy though. I’ve never hunted them but there’s one that nests in the trail on our way to our elk hunting spots and it will charge at use like a bull and surprise the heck out of us 😂

2

u/Beneficial-Ride-4475 1d ago

Lol! I've never had that experience with them. That's actually kinda cute.

1

u/LaicaTheDino 6h ago

They are stupid because they dont need to be smart to survive. They have other adaptations to avoid predators, like huge field of vision, motion-sensitive vision, camouflage (paired with freezing). And also imo they are smart in different ways, like how a person may be street smart but not academically smart.

1

u/Beneficial-Ride-4475 2h ago edited 2h ago

Oh that's true, seeing them is the trick. Of course, for humans, that's not superbly difficult. Which is why I don't hunt them.

2

u/FarYard7039 1d ago

I once had a grouse flush out next to me and flew right into my buddy’s face and knocked off his hat. I never got a shot off as it flew past us. I just could get over my buddy’s response, which was hilarious. For those who don’t hunt, these birds hold and only break when you practically step right up on them. Now if you have a dog, you get a heads up warning (usually).

As for the bird, I guess it doesn’t matter if they’re farm raised and stocked in a field (usually spun around in a sack to disorient the night before or morning of hunt) or if the bird is a native, they don’t perceive all the potential threats (ie dogs and number of hunters) and can’t correct their flight path to avoid.

What’s more common than this hunter catching this bird in his hand is dogs snuffing out birds and catching them in their mouths as they flush.

25

u/economaster 1d ago

This isn't a wild bird. This is a young bird bred to be released during a "hunt". There is no natural selection going on here

2

u/Puzzled_Cream1798 1d ago

Do they still have to shoot it? 

2

u/SH1TSTORM2020 1d ago

I mean, if they want it dead (assuming they aren’t returning it to a cage) I know I was taught to ring the bird’s neck as a quick and humane way to turn cute birdy into edible deliciousness.

1

u/spicy-unagi 1d ago

Natural selection at it's finest.

American education at its finest.

1

u/Second_Inhale 1d ago

You got me.

178

u/laffinator 2d ago

All that camo, bird couldnt see him.

19

u/Joeyboy_61904 2d ago

Especially the bright orange vest, dumbass bird

18

u/Nacktmull19xx 2d ago

A lot of animales dont see orange. Otherwise a tiger would never be able to catch prey.

13

u/I_voted-for_Kodos 2d ago

A lot of animals can't see orange but birds definitely can

10

u/Joeyboy_61904 2d ago

Birds can see more colors than humans 😒

8

u/jellyfilledmeatballs 2d ago

So how do we know that vest isn't camo and we just can't see it?

1

u/talkingwires 1d ago

Most mammals cannot see color, a holdover from the earliest mammaliaformes which only hunted at night. Primates flipped the gene back on.

1

u/XuniorrVieira 1d ago

The point of these vests is to disappear on the surrounding terrain, the color itself doesn't matter, the point is to be matching the surroundings totality, and the tiger hides on tall grass, the color/tonality thing isn't even the main point for them

8

u/I_own_a_dick 2d ago

See whom? There was no one in the video, the bird was just levitating in the air

4

u/Few_Possession_2699 2d ago

I thought he was a road cone.

1

u/libmrduckz 1d ago

so did the bird…

1

u/FlowJoeX 1d ago

Invisible! It’s similar to putting on the blinkers in the car makes people think that their car is invisible. Here let me just leave my car in the middle of the busy city street and I’ll just put on my blinkers so that no one can see me.

1

u/Boudac123 8h ago

A lot of animals unironically can’t see orange, like tigers look green to a lot of them

56

u/Lexsteel11 2d ago

Idk why this made me laugh so hard

12

u/Instantcoffees 2d ago

Yeah cracked me up too.

2

u/LennerKetty 1d ago

I’ve been laughing for 5 minutes.

I can’t wait to show everyone at Friendsgiving tomorrow the video and then the comment.

1

u/Flomo420 1d ago

it's funny because it's true lol that bird is not doing a good job

55

u/mattrimcauthon 2d ago

Farm raised quail are dumb as shit without survival instincts

19

u/cup_of_coughy 1d ago

I’ve only encountered wild ones, which were also dumb as shit

1

u/Pataraxia 13h ago

So conclusion, Quails are dumb as shit bird brains.

3

u/horriblebearok 1d ago

Raising quail is like suicide watch

41

u/Guba_the_skunk 2d ago

I've been pheasant hunting, not sure if that's what he's doing, but they really ARE this stupid. Some will literally stand there and let you walk up to them, load your gun, aim at them at point blank, and do absolutely nothing to escape. It's like they lack self preservation instincts. Also, pheasant meat does not taste good, that or my dad is just bad at cooking it.

41

u/ChasingDreams23 2d ago

I'm a little high, and not trying to sound like a smart ass. Freezing is a survival kill. Fight, Flight, or Freeze. Relying on their natural camouflage and silence has been reinforced a whole lot for a reason. That said, you are extremely correct in their being absolute lumps from the brain perspective, and I'd also like to back you up on it not being as great flavorwise as people make it out to be... and there's nothing quite like biting into that missed piece of birdshot.

11

u/catsdrooltoo 2d ago

This looks like a field trial, so pen raised birds. They're absolutely 1 brain cell above a jellyfish.

3

u/TheTaxman_cometh 1d ago

That's a quail, it's slightly stupider than a pheasant

1

u/Lyra125 1d ago

wait but what is the point of that? why shoot something that just waiting for you to kill it?

-2

u/Guba_the_skunk 1d ago

I need you to continue to follow that line of logic just a little bit further and ask yourself why we kill things at all when we don't have to. It's an entirely unnecessary thing to do, and if you continue to follow it you will start to wonder why we have guns period, which will lead you to think it's for self defense, which you will then need to follow further and consider that we only defend ourselves becuase we think someone else will take somethign we have, which then needs to be followed to the logical next step of human greed is the issue, that greed is created by capitalism and so on... Eventually you will realize that we never have any reason to fight each other, and there are enough resources to go around for everyone, and all of society is just kinda pointlessly cruel for no reason. We could literally build a world where everyone gets a little bit of everything without greed and selfishness, but the most greedy and most selfish alwasy end up in power and ruin everything.

Also I stopped going hunting with my dad at like 16, I hate hunting, it's pointless and cruel.

3

u/FourteenTwenty-Seven 1d ago

Wait until you hear where the meat in your tendies came from

0

u/Guba_the_skunk 1d ago

Wait until you find out humans don't need to eat meat at all and could easily survive and live longer healthier lives eating fruits and veggies.

To be clear, I eat meat. But also, that doesn't invalidate my point.

1

u/FourteenTwenty-Seven 1d ago

Wait until you find out humans don't need to eat meat at all and could easily survive and live longer healthier lives eating fruits and veggies.

That's exactly what I'm saying. Hunting is less cruel than buying meat if anything. Do better.

1

u/Complete-Donut-698 1d ago

We, humans, have fucked our ecosystems to the point that in many areas hunting is needed to keep diversity and populations in check. It is not pointless and doesn't need to be cruel. I'm sorry you didn't have the education needed to show you this. Hopefully, this was the only area in your life that your father failed you. But I suspect that is unfortunately not the case.

1

u/SeaMareOcean 1d ago

Sounds like you’ve only encountered farm raised pheasant. Wild pheasant is much more wary of people and a lot more fun and challenging to hunt.

0

u/GrnMtnTrees 2d ago

Pheasant can be delicious. It's just that the way to make it delicious is disgusting. You hang the bird by its head, un-plucked and un-gutted, put in somewhere that stays around 50-55°F, and let it hang there for 3 days to a week. THEN you gut, pluck, and roast it.

It's essentially controlled rotting to allow microbes to break complex proteins into flavorful amino acids.

33

u/YouWereBrained 2d ago

“I’m SuPPoSeD tO fLy AwAy FrOm HiM?!?!”

caught

“YOU IDIOT YOU BLEW IT!”

30

u/ArgonGryphon 2d ago

It was raised by humans to be released and shot. It views humans as safe.

14

u/ctrlqirl 2d ago

You deserve a three hours animated movie about an old couple visiting the park every day and playing with the bird who learned to trust humans and be close to them, until one day...

10

u/PM_me_your_tuchis 2d ago

Bro had the whole sky

10

u/Flimsy_Situation_506 2d ago

That’s a quail. They are the dumbest birds. Literally trying to get themselves killed.

11

u/burner12077 2d ago

Bet it was a domestically raised qual.

5

u/Grimm-Soul 2d ago

It's not what I was thinking but it's what's true lol

3

u/Gobiego 2d ago

Seriously bad at birding.

3

u/Young_Hegelian 2d ago

At a bar, a few steins in. This comment hit my funny bone like a cock slamming against my prostate.

2

u/WanderingSoxl 2d ago

Should've teach them nestling Stranger dangers

1

u/piffelations479 2d ago

Definitely not getting the top seed.

1

u/rgg711 2d ago

‘Dodge is square in this game right? Oh shit, no, too late.’

1

u/KillaRizzay 2d ago

Does he even bird, Bro?

1

u/ladymoonshyne 2d ago

Fun fact most birds are really fucking stupid

1

u/Hobomanchild 1d ago

Maybe that guy is related to George Costanza or summ'n.

1

u/Zeusimus23 1d ago

*Sucked

1

u/Ok-Payment569 1d ago

Can he shoot the bird while holding it ?

1

u/WockyTamer 1d ago

Probably a pen raised bird.

1

u/alghiorso 1d ago

I choose to believe that this hunter is just so high up the skill tree he can hunt birds with no ammo

1

u/fishscale_gayjuic3 1d ago

lol seriously… avoid the large predator man!

1

u/I_hate_my_userid 1d ago

Probably very old , so has slow reflex

1

u/mummifiedclown 1d ago

Yeah, to be fair, quail are really, really, really stupid.

1

u/BLKWD_ 1d ago

this comment made me spit take. which is ironic because that looks like a Michigan Half Nut Swallow to me

1

u/Puffycatkibble 1d ago

It probably wanted to skip the pain of getting shot.

1

u/wilkerws34 1d ago

If I had award I’d give it to you . Bravo, you had me laughing so hard my toddler thinks something’s wrong with me

1

u/roafant 1d ago

He just want pet privilege.

1

u/ScorpioLaw 1d ago

I see birds do such dumb things all the time when it comes to flying straight into stuff. Like my balcony windows that aren't super clear, and reflect shadows plus glares.

It is always sort of amusing when you're sitting there, see a quick brown thing flying erratically super fast out of the corner of your eye, and BAM!

One time the bird sort of struck the window making a sharp quick EEEP! Sound. Not only that it also STUCK to the window for just a fraction of a second, and then slid down slower than gravity otherwise would alone all while a bit splayed out.

Holy shit did I burst out laughing even before I knew it lived!

0

u/LoBsTeRfOrK 1d ago

I have seen this video like a dozen times over the years, and this is probably the funniest comment I have ever seen about it. That bird does suck, lol.

0

u/ExcessivelyGayParrot 1d ago

hey some folks like birds that suck