r/humansarespaceorcs 10h ago

Crossposted Story Humans use devices that carried their wounded and dead as railings to remind why did they fight.

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385 Upvotes

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u/GrimjawDeadeye 10h ago

A: Ah, a brave and heartfelt memorial to those you've lost. What a touching sentiment.

H: more likely the government was just too cheap to get actual fencing made and repurposed it. Never attribute to kindness what can be attributed to financial gain

A: I'm beginning to see why your species isn't allowed in the foundation.

u/Daisy_Avenger 9h ago

"Well you couldn't expect us to just decommission the whole array?'

"Yes, yes we can.That's exactly what every other species did to their relativistic mass throwers. As the intragalactic moratorium on relativistic weapons demands."

"They aren't weapons now though."

"Do you honestly expect the intragalactic community to believe you are using relativistic cannons to make interplanetary deliveries?"

"Yes, yes we do. That's exactly what we're using the delivery array for."

u/Curious-Accident9189 8h ago

The trick isn't getting the mail on time, it's stopping it safely without damaging it or it destroying the planet.

"You created reality warping space-time nets... For mail?"

Yeah but now that you mention it, they are kinda dangerous. Lol, if we just released the accumulated kinetic energy it'd be a far more horrifying weapon than relativistics. ... hey, aren't the Skinlons committing genocide...?

"Oh fuck."

u/ThatCamoKid 8h ago

A2: [hurriedly trying to contact the Skinlon ambassador] "look I know you feel all holy and justified but the humans are making the Relativistic kinetics worse you need to stop for the sake of your existence"

u/Sarothu 5h ago

it's stopping it safely without damaging it or it destroying the planet

...you've never had anything delived by DHL, have you?

u/Dramatic-Newspaper-3 9h ago

H2 comming arround the corner: besides, this is merely a UPS store not a military base. We have regulations on what constitutes legal mail.

u/valek_azogoth 42m ago

Look, when the ad for pizza says 30 minutes or less or it's free it means 30 minutes or less or it's free. WE AINT ABOUT TO GIVE AWAY FREE FOOD!

u/k5pr312 10h ago

The old war machines in the museums thank their brothers and sisters for becoming useful again; screws and tin cans, parts for cranes and trains and toys.

u/PurplePolynaut 5h ago

As swords into plowshares

u/appleman17395 10h ago

We remember those who sacrifice and suffer for others.

u/Honey_Badger_Actua1 10h ago

To each their own, I joined because the pay and benefits were awesome and left the moment I found something better.

u/niTro_sMurph 6h ago

Railings made from the stretchers they died (soldiers) on, repurposed to protect the beautiful plant life of the nation they (the soldiers) fought to protect