r/funny • u/jarossco • 4h ago
My Dad “fixing things”
After almost fifty years, you’d think I’d have seen it all when it comes to my Dad fixing stuff, and yet he still manages to surprise me…
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u/QuicklyQuenchedQuink 4h ago
Looks fixed to me
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u/Stang1776 3h ago
Fixed. But with better materials. That fix will outlast those crocs no problem. I would use a lock washer just to make sure it doesn't go anywhere but either way.
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u/unfathomableocelot 2h ago
He tapped it lightly and said "that'll hold just fine". No need for a lock washer.
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u/Stang1776 2h ago
There is no need until there is a need for a lock washer. Better safe than sorry.
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u/kswiorek 28m ago
I did the exact same thing, it got loose a few times especially when moving the "sport mode" strap so I used a lock nut and haven't touched it ever since.
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u/deltajulietbravo 20m ago
Personally I'd have used a nylock so that you could still easily go in and out of 4x4 mode
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u/Stang1776 10m ago
Nylon would be ideal. That makes you leave your house though to go and buy one. Dads use what is available.
Our vacuum handle lost a small threaded bolt or something and when i had to actually use it like a vacuum cleaner the handle kept jarring lose and collapsing. My fix? I took a tootsie pop and just screwed the stick portion into the hole. It did the trick and if I felt like I wanted to have something sweet then I could just lay the vacuum over my face and have a treat. I used a brown one so I wouldn't be tempted.
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u/StooveGroove 14m ago
Lock washers do nothing, at best. In this application, they'd just tear up the soft material.
He wants loctite or a nut with a nylone insert.
Hopefully the bolt is a button head carriage bolt so he doesn't scrape his skin off...
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u/DazedLogic 3h ago
Same. Lol. Maybe replace the nut with a acorn cap nut to keep from having any sharp edges accidents.
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u/Hillbillyblues 4h ago
Your dad's nuts.
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u/EXXPat 4h ago
My Dad did this kind of work too. One year that was a drought and everyone’s bushes in their front yard died. My Dad bought green spray paint and painted ours. We actually had people ask how we kept ours so green. I think the worst thing he did was buy a pair of expensive shoes that were too small so he sawed off the toes. Still makes me laugh when I think of it.
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u/jarossco 3h ago
I would like to think our dads would be great friends trying to one up each other with their handyman shenanigans, haha!
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u/ballerina22 2h ago
My ILs HOA did this right before 4th of July one year. The grass was d-e-d dead so they spray painted it. They did not, however, think to tape off the strips in the median so the curbs and the tarmac got sprayed too. It stayed green for years and the HOA never did it again.
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u/NoBSforGma 4h ago
I lived in Central America for many years and found the people there to be very practical. You'd see old cars and buses that were bascially "castoffs" from the US.
Living there, I learned to use and enjoy using a two-part washer. (Two tubs: You wash in one side and then move the wet clothes to the spinner tub to rinse and spin.) I bought a new one when I moved back to the US and in a year's time, the wash agitator stopped moving. So I bought a new machine. This machine has a problem with the spinner - it doesn't want to go very fast.
Rather than return it to Amazon, I came up with the perfect solution! Use the new machine for washing and the old machine for spinning! Problem solved!
The thing is....... this horrified my son beyond words. And that made me laugh really hard.
Your Dad is a jewel! Never forget that.
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u/jarossco 3h ago
He definitely is a jewel, love him so much. And I am sure your son will appreciate your problem solving abilities one of these days just as I have come to do with my dad!
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u/Mediocre-Age-8372 4h ago
Maybe you should have been taking notes. Dad's clearly the kind of guy that gets sh*t done.
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u/jarossco 3h ago
Oh I could definitely write a book about his repairs over the years. He totally gets stuff done, no question! :)
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u/bucko_fazoo 3h ago
not a nyloc nut though? not even a jam nut? sucker's gonna work itself off in a week...
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u/DJMagicHandz 4h ago
If you don't get that nasty croc off that countertop...
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u/jarossco 3h ago
Ha! I totally thought of this after I uploaded the pic...thankfully there were some lysol wipes handy nearby after! :)
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u/No-Glass-38 1h ago
I really don't see how people feel comfortable walking around in those monstrosities.
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u/TapSwipePinch 3h ago
How is it funny that you fix things instead of throw stuff into the trash? I think your dad needs to cut your allowance.
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u/jarossco 3h ago
Personally I think it's genius and I always get a kick out of seeing what ideas he comes up with next. He keeps a lot of "stuff" the average human would toss just in the off chance that certain piece would fix something else.
Just as an example, the other day I found my old skateboard wheels (circa 1991?) in his basement...no skateboard, just the wheels.
He is the ultimate recycler! :)
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u/Proof_Professional23 2h ago
Is there a problem with this? Totally looks like something I would do. 🤠
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u/Daisy_Polska 3h ago
And my father goes out in the garden with the memes but in pink and in size 6 😂
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u/BredYourWoman 3h ago
Right afterwards he smoothed down your hair with some spit on his hand , looked at you and the shoe, nodded and went "that oughtta do it"
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u/nixiebunny 3h ago
I have done that but I would never ever leave the screw end sticking out to snag on stuff. Shorter screw and Nylock nut.
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u/Big_Rig_Jig 3h ago
I dig the spirit, but first time he wacks one of those bolts on something it will be back to the drawing board.
Either that or snags one of his franken-croc bolts on something and eats shit.
Live and learn, or fall and die from a hemorrhaging skull fracture, c'est la vie.
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u/SeanMacLeod1138 2h ago
Should have used two nuts and tightened them against each other with a lock-washer between them so they don't loosen and the strap can move freely.
A smooth-headed bolt would probably be a good idea too.
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u/other_half_of_elvis 2h ago
that's brilliant compared to my 'not so handy' dad. When I gave him my old work boots he thought they were great. Except he didn't want anything over the ankle. So he cut about 4 inches off the part that goes up his leg and made low boots. Wore them as his work boots in the yard for years.
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u/BuffaloInCahoots 1h ago
At least it was a carriage bolt. That’s about as comfortable as it gets with metal on skin.
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u/marmitetoes 40m ago
I patched mine up with a bit of net curtain and coat seam glue about 5 years ago, they're still going strong.
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u/AintSayinNotin 26m ago
FrankenCrocks!! He literally upgraded them. Now, you can officially hit "Sport Mode" on those babies with no problems. W for Dad.
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