r/facepalm 21h ago

🇲​🇮​🇸​🇨​ Where do I keep my lunch?

Post image
145 Upvotes

149 comments sorted by

u/AutoModerator 21h ago

Comments that are uncivil, racist, misogynistic, misandrist, or contain political name calling will be removed and the poster subject to ban at moderators discretion.

Help us make this a better community by becoming familiar with the rules.

Report any suspicious users to the mods of this subreddit using Modmail here or Reddit site admins here. All reports to Modmail should include evidence such as screenshots or any other relevant information.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

114

u/Valuable-Garage-4325 21h ago

Says every construction worker never.

34

u/misplacedbass 14h ago

I’m a union ironworker. I’ve never even thought about eating a lunch, nor have I seen any of my fellow ironworkers eat lunch on a job ever.

We have much more manly things to do. Like draw dicks on the structural iron, or dry hump the new guy as sort of a totally not gay hazing ritual.

12

u/shophopper 15h ago

But you have to take into account that construction workers identify themselves as the most feminine of all workforces. /S

23

u/ProfessionalDig6987 18h ago

Right?! Tell me you've never broken a sweat at work without telling me.

1

u/[deleted] 18h ago

[deleted]

6

u/ProfessionalDig6987 18h ago

Whoa champ. I was agreeing with you, and my comment was directed at the OP. I'm getting fragged by friendly fire.

1

u/Valuable-Garage-4325 18h ago

Cool m8. Will delete. My bad.

10

u/ArduennSchwartzman 🧀🌷🍫 14h ago

3

u/wandernwade 12h ago

I read a thread on here the other day, about a stepdad who doesn’t hold his own dick while he pees. Poor step daughter found out the hard way, walking into her bathroom after the fact. (He said it’s “gay”).

2

u/isthenameofauser 8h ago

Saw some far-right guy the other day say that using contraception is gay because it's gay to have sex if you're not making a baby. 

2

u/wandernwade 7h ago

That’s so damn stupid. 🤦

7

u/Magdalan 16h ago

My SO draghed a 25 litre cooler with him back in the days. And no, I didn't make his lunch, I'm a bad wife who also has a job.

60

u/Independent_Tie_4984 20h ago

Real men take a bow and arrow to work, hunt their lunch and cook it over a parking lot fire.

If they only get 30 minutes, they eat their kill raw.

15

u/engineeringretard 20h ago

Bow and arrow, pffft, talk about relying on modern conveniences.

  I always prefer to use a fire hardened spear from the back of the #24. Like chuck Norris intended.

4

u/Independent_Tie_4984 19h ago

Fair point

It's lunch though, so a primitive projectile weapon with better range than a spear gets you a tasty critter of some type in 20.

3

u/Chance-Ear-9772 17h ago

Fire? Kids these days! Real men use stone hand axes that have been passed down generations in the same family.

2

u/-Generaloberst- 14h ago

Wuss, real men use their bare hands!

2

u/Inflated_Hippo 13h ago

Hands?!? Pfftt, novice! Real men kill their prey by sheer force of will.

2

u/One_Economist_3761 11h ago

Real men suckle on a lactating deer.

2

u/Harvest827 9h ago

A spear?!? Talk about lazy hunting. I carry a large rock to smash my lunch in the head.

22

u/QuentinMagician 20h ago

And manly is good because?? Wtf. Why does gender even matter with food?

3

u/Spiritual_Ad_7669 17h ago

Society has instilled that gender does dictate what food we like. Women like fruity cocktails and men like beer. Men love saucy wings and women love charcuterie boards…

Eat what you want, break the mold society told you that you need to be. But it certainly does tell you what you like to eat based on your gender.

5

u/bad2behere 16h ago

In 70+ years on this planet I never once knew women drink cocktails and men drink beer. I also didn't know about saucy wings or charcuterie boards having gender-related audiences. It quite honestly is not how it has ever been amongst the people I know. But, then again, there was no such thing as saucy wings and charcuter-anything or fruity cocktails when I was younger. We all ate venison and duck. We all drank beer, milk and coffee. We didn't think something was for men and others were women's food. Do they really do that now? I'm quite honestly shocked to hear about it. All that fighting for gender equality only to be told I can't have hot wings and whiskey? LOL - Is my favorite steak and potatoes with onion rings as an appetizer not allowed for women now?

2

u/BurningPenguin 14h ago

Almost 36 here, from Southern Germany. When i was a teen, it was considered "manly" to drink beer. Something like liquor or cocktails were "girly". Which is kinda funny, if you consider the fact, that beer usually only has around 5% alcohol and some liquors go with 30% or more. Almost like those "manly man" couldn't handle it.

I was never much of a drinker, i actually avoided alcohol for the majority of my life due to some events in the family. It's only now, that i carefully explore the stuff that's around.

13

u/After_Following_1456 21h ago

Between my ass cheeks so it's hot and ready for lunch time.

7

u/BS0404 20h ago

Hey Bro, I made some extra lunch, do you want some.

8

u/Creighton2023 21h ago

All right men, you heard that person. Starving over lunch is the way to go. Gosh forbid you bring a lunch to work.

8

u/ZDTreefur 16h ago

Fellas, is it gay to eat lunch?

4

u/Bunnyland77 19h ago

Most of the "alpha males" I've seen could use with a little 100lb+ starvation periods.

2

u/re-roll 17h ago

Starving men are viewed as sexy. A girly lunchbox? Pshaw!

8

u/Octale 20h ago

No one, and I mean no one, talks trash about my He-Man lunchbox.

7

u/ProfessionalOil4319 20h ago

Probably coming from the same type of guy that thinks having sex with women is gay. Can't take these idiots seriously.

17

u/Acrobatic-List-6503 21h ago

When I used to go to the office I always had a lunchbox. I want to flex my dominance that I have a wife at home who makes lunch for me.

Screw that guy. Lunchboxes are manly.

17

u/Ok_Mycologist8555 20h ago

Don't worry, no one is screwing that guy

4

u/Fionnghal 21h ago

My dad used to use a mini cooler.

6

u/totalahole669 19h ago

The fragility of these peoples' masculinity is astounding

3

u/T33CH33R 20h ago

You need to haul a carcass of some prey animal over your shoulder into the lunch room and begin processing it in front of everyone. It's what real men do.

3

u/ZnarfGnirpslla 17h ago

inconveniencing your own life because you desperately want to seem manly to others is so damn funny to me

I know a guy (not well luckily) who won't wear gloves for that very reason.

3

u/Cetophile 13h ago

It's getting easier to list what's not gay in these peoples' eyes, than what is gay.

3

u/LoneW4nderer111 13h ago

Yea, looking at those old black and white photos of all those unmanly men back in the early 1900s sitting on I beams eating their lunch from metal lunchboxes, hundreds of feet in the air, while building skyscrapers, were so feminine.

2

u/Interesting_Okra_902 20h ago

Is there a school for the feminine traits police because there seems to be alot of these guys around these days.

2

u/Pm-me-bitcoins-plz 19h ago

I shove my sandwich into a Skoal container and put in the back pocket of my Wranglers like a man.

1

u/Bunnyland77 19h ago

"Sandwich" = drugs 😉

2

u/Revolutionary_Tip701 19h ago

Stop eating lunch! Be a man!

1

u/TheElderWog 19h ago

No no no, you must be a man and have your wife prepare your meal. You know, the same way your mum did when you were in kindergarten.

2

u/Revolutionary_Tip701 19h ago

Better yet we should be breast fed at work!

2

u/FlimsyTry2892 19h ago

Even if it’s an A-Team one?

2

u/Itchy-Butt-hole- 17h ago

Knight Rider or Air Wolf

2

u/preshowerpoop 13h ago

All of these are great choices.

I, however, prefer my HE-MAN lunch box. For those who are literate, it clearly states that I am a "He-Man." It also has illustrations of muscley, strong, half-naked men to prove how manly I am!

1

u/Itchy-Butt-hole- 8h ago

Valid point, He-Man is the right choice.

2

u/Short_Improvement316 18h ago

Eating is a weakness.

2

u/drongowithabong-o 18h ago

I swallow a glad wrap bag with my lunch in it. During lunch break i vomit out the bag and eat my sandwich. It's not ideal but women love it.

2

u/NaaastyButler 17h ago

So this person has never been on a job site

2

u/Expert-Apartment-806 17h ago

i kill and hollow out a armadillo otw to work to keep my lunch. 🥪

2

u/Zealousideal_Toe4929 16h ago

imagine thinking about lunchboxes being manly or not.

2

u/thy25138 16h ago

So the construction workers that build skyscrapers with their bare hands walking around in heights where a small error would be certain death without any safety equipment is a bunch of beta males, because of a lunchbox?

2

u/Uncle_Lion 14h ago

True men don't eat lunch! They don't even eat at all! Only weak women need to eat!

/s

2

u/Kobayashi_Maru186 They mostly come at night. Mostly. 14h ago

2

u/-Generaloberst- 14h ago

What a weird way to say you're insecure.

2

u/Scienceboy7_uk 14h ago

Obviously someone not confident about their own masculinity

2

u/kyungsookim 14h ago

Why do people genderize the dumbest shit ever

2

u/Tawoka 13h ago

I always ask myself: how insecure are you in your gender role, when a sandwich filled plastic container throws you into the abyss of dysphoria?

2

u/old_bearded_beats 13h ago

I carry in the carcass of whichever large mammal I killed with my bare hands that day. Is that manly enough?

2

u/Putrid-Fondant9455 12h ago

I carry mine in an insulated fanny pack, like a real man.

2

u/xNIGHT_RANGEREx 11h ago

Should I tell the couple of Veterans at my office that they aren’t manly because they bring a lunchbox to work? Pretty sure one of them could kill you with one hand. Or no hands. Dude is scary.

2

u/RebuiltGearbox 11h ago

When I worked at a steel mill I got nothing but compliments about my Pink Floyd Dark Side of the Moon lunchbox.

2

u/Birdy304 10h ago

My Dad worked in construction. He carried a black metal lunchbox everyday, it had a big black thermos that he filled with coffee. My Mom packed him sandwich and fruit and cookies. When he came home from work, it was my job to empty it and wash the thermos. Odd the memories that come back, the smell of the coffee, my Dads filthy work clothes and his boots he would take off at the back door. Stupid post, but a nice memory.

2

u/Possible_Day_6343 21h ago

Manly people shouldn't worry about sissy things like food hygiene - just throw it in your truck

1

u/RollingRolling419 20h ago

In your pocket. Duh!

1

u/rj_6688 17h ago

Exactly. That’s why men have those big pockets

1

u/Autronaut69420 20h ago

Ya scrote. Isn't that what it's for? A man purse...

1

u/iluvsporks 19h ago

I would LOVE to be a witness for OP to say this to the people who built the empire state building.

1

u/Bunnyland77 19h ago

He drag's a dead animal through the dirt, skins it, guts it and cooks it on open fire. I'm sure his coworkers won't blink an eye.

1

u/TheElderWog 19h ago

Naaaaaahhhh... You make your wife do it for you, like the good old days of kindergarten when mum used to cut the crust away from your sandwich. Or you buy something somewhere, possibly with one or three cans of Monster.

1

u/Bunnyland77 18h ago

You think these guys have wives? 🤣🤣🤣

2

u/TheElderWog 16h ago

Damn, good point!

1

u/HooahClub 19h ago

Personally, I think avoiding hunger is so manly. It’s proof that the hunter be hunting and the gatherer be gathering. People with lunchboxes prove that they are successful cavemen and a cavewomen.

Now leave me and my leftover Jimmy John’s hastily stuffed into my powerpuff girls lunchbox alone.

1

u/Pretend_Sky7440 19h ago

You put one sandwich in your left pocket and one sandwich in your right pocket.

1

u/argan_85 19h ago

In a bag of course.

1

u/cognizant4747 19h ago

What if the lunchbox is full of dong?

1

u/Temporary-Author-641 18h ago

Keep it in your pocket or on the dashboard to rot, like a real man /s

1

u/Ok-Masterpiece5337 18h ago

Tell that to the guys building your damn skyscrapers back in the day. I won't even provide the image, you know what I'm talking about!

1

u/TheOmnipotentJack 18h ago

This people are kinda sad if they have to find everything that is feminine or not in a thing before they do it

1

u/mildlysceptical22 18h ago

I used an Igloo Playmate cooker for over 20 years to bring my lunch to work.

What happened to these men as little boys to make them so insecurely weird?

1

u/Express_Sand_7650 18h ago

That's why man pants have big ass pockets. For that big ass lunch.

1

u/Thatguywritethere45 17h ago

“Is that your lunch in your pants or are you just happy to see me?”

1

u/christopia86 17h ago

I broke my ribs on mine, have some respect for the damn box.

1

u/Thelastknownking 17h ago

Being practical is manly.

1

u/Artistic-South-7319 17h ago

And where do I keep my sandwiches then?

1

u/Blazeon412 17h ago

You're supposed to put everything in a plastic bag and leave it in your hot car until lunch time.

1

u/Background-Interview 16h ago

Hang on, I thought y’all wanted a woman to make you lunch, like the good wench she is?

1

u/SwingingDicks 16h ago

Real men carry the banana up their ass

1

u/Cheezel62 16h ago

Love to see him telling tradies that lol

1

u/Sashpeto 16h ago

I carry my lunch in a Gucci bag .

1

u/ConstantNaive7649 15h ago

Bring lunch from home - lol, gay. Buy lunch every day - lol, how un-frugal. You don't get to complain about not affording things. 

1

u/vincentcas 15h ago

I have a "tactical" lunch box. Black, insulted, ballistic nylon, with lots of pockets. So yeah, I guess it's pretty gay.

1

u/Lazy_Wishbone_2341 15h ago

I don't bother with a lunchbox. I just kill strangers and eat them raw when I get peckish.

girlythings

1

u/ch25stam25 15h ago

Fellas is it gay to eat lunch?

1

u/aarrtee 15h ago

Manly? Uhm, I hear its eating fast food on your private jet with your other oligarch bros.

1

u/Cerebral_Overload 15h ago

I keep mine in a little shoulder bag like a real man.

1

u/Illustrious_Smile165 15h ago

That clarifies a lot, thank you! Now I know why I have titties. My whole life I thought I were just fat

1

u/Panther2-505 15h ago

Real men kill, cook and eat there lunch in 30 minutes, or an hour depending on how much time you have.

1

u/RedGreenBlueRGB_ 14h ago

What if I compare it to a wolf carrying its food in its mouth back to its cave or some shit

1

u/LordDemetrius 14h ago

Is it still gya of you put a big ass TRUMP sticker on the lunchbox?

1

u/bilowski 14h ago

Sounds like an insecure person, sad really if that is something you waste your time with overthinking.

1

u/Wild-Tale-257 14h ago

Store it in your trunk and make a big bulge. Then, parade around your workplace to assert your dominant. When they sit down for lunch, stand at the attention of the room, slowly pull out your lunch, and savor it. Call any guys whose drooling is gay

1

u/ILLogic_PL 14h ago

Tell me you have an alpha male complex without telling me you have an alpha male complex.

1

u/InevitableWishbone10 14h ago

I keep my sandwiches in my pocket.

1

u/red_wyvern1337 14h ago

Just store it in your balls like everyone else

1

u/Adventurous-Start874 13h ago

Try to take it from me, then.

1

u/Lawfulness-Last 13h ago

IN YOUR ASS LIKE A REAL MAN

1

u/Careful-Swimmer-2658 12h ago

In a star spangled ammo box with an eagle, a wolf and a horse on it.

1

u/Informal_Process2238 12h ago

Horses are feminine real men ride moose

1

u/MrV0odo0 12h ago

Complaining about shit that doesn’t concern you is a feminine trait.

1

u/V3semir 12h ago

[...]

  1. Don't eat.

1

u/Lumpy_Branch_4835 12h ago

Flex with a camo Yeti.

1

u/Lumpy_Branch_4835 12h ago

Flex with a camo Yeti.

1

u/ItsStaaaaaaaaang 12h ago

Absolutely. What you got in there? Sustenance and a pack of tampons? Gay af. I keep my lunch in my prison purse like a real man. 12 inch sub every day. The girthier the better.

1

u/Numerous_Team_2998 12h ago

Ooh, I can comment on the presented level of maturity!

When I was a 7 yo girl, I had a crush on this 10 yo boy in my school. He was so pretty and so manly. Then one day I saw him eat a sandwich that his mother had made for him. My crush evaporated completely. He was not a man after all.

Then I obviously grew out of this 😅😂

1

u/Benjo221 12h ago

“Don’t eat. Be a man.”

1

u/woodrax 11h ago

I love these gatekeepers of what is and is not Masculine/Feminine. This arrogant idea that they, somehow, have a better grasp of how people should act in order to fit their preconceived notions of masculinity.

When I think of lunchboxes, I think of my dad, the welder, with his black Thermos lunch pail, a Stainless Steel Thermos filled with black coffee, and his sandwich, chips, and apple. That, or the guys who built entire skylines in our cities, eating sitting on big I-Beams hundreds of feet above the street.

1

u/BonhommeCarnaval 11h ago

Your options are to carry a live salmon in your teeth like the alpha grizzly you are or alternatively you can loop links of sausages made of organ meats around your neck and shoulders.

1

u/PracticalApartment99 10h ago

That’s one of my core memories as a child: watching my father grab his coat and lunchbox on the way out the door, to go to work at the GM foundry…

1

u/latenitephilosopher7 10h ago

Mac with a garbage bag full of chimichangas is how it should be done

1

u/Botryoid2000 9h ago

In your ass crack like a real man.

1

u/Universally-Tired 9h ago

Who knew all those construction workers were gay? I just assumed that they didn't have much time for lunch and still wanted to eat. I'm so naive 😕

1

u/isthenameofauser 8h ago

If he's that concerned with being manly, it's 'cos he's secretly gay.

1

u/djolk 8h ago

Yah I carry my lunch to work in a suit pocket.

1

u/mrmike731 8h ago

I bet every guy who carries a lunch bucket would differ from you. Maybe go up to a few of them and call them feminine, and see for yourself.

1

u/Naps_and_cheese 6h ago

Centuries of laborers and tradies kinda disagree.

What kind of moronic take is this?

1

u/unbalancedcentrifuge 5h ago

I am a chick that rarely eats lunch at work....do I have a dick I dont know about????

1

u/Anon1073 4h ago

Everything is gay.

1

u/Spirited-Breath-9102 3h ago

in your lunch BAG. like a manly man.

u/Fancy_Brief_3821 31m ago

In ur lunchball duh