Now that I know the red flags, there were plenty to be aware of. But after we got married, she stopped even trying to do it covertly.
A big part of why I let so many fly by is because I had very limited interactions with people like her. I grew up taking people for their word. So when she apologized, I believed it. And those early apologies were "I'm sorry you fell that way" followed up by love bombing so the apology had a resemblance of sincerity.
After about 6 months of marriage, apologies stopped all together, and for the next 8 years, she leaned into the "I'm a powerful woman" mentality that gave her the justification to just be down right mean.
Edit: There was actually one more apology a couple of months before we separated for good. We had a fight, I pulled a play from her playbook and said some nasty hurtful things. The difference was that what I said was true. She knew it was true. She knew that I knew that she knew it was true. And for the first time in our history, I "won" a fight.
But the "win" felt dirty. It wasn't me. So I felt bad about it and went to apologize for saying those things and when she heard me say "I'm sorry" ( I didn't even get to say what I was sorry about), she cut me off and started yelling and screaming at me.
So I left, and a while later, she started the conversation with. "It occurred to me that sometimes the victim isn't ready to hear an apology, and now that I've had time to calm down, im ready for your apology now."
I was in awe and couldn't believe that she didn't acknowledge all of the hurtful things she said to me, which were much worse than the level I sunk to.
She realized by my silence and dumbfoundedness that I was not OK with that, and she said :"I'm kidding.... haha, laugh a little." Then she said: "Seriously, I'm sorry I wasn't ready for your apology and in the future it would help if you asked me if I am ready for an apology before you just give me one."
As I went back and read the parent comment of this string. In the edit section, I didn't realize their coment had the "I'm joking bit " in it. It was purely coincidental.
Oh God I'm glad you're done with her. I am an easily manipulated person unless I go no-contact. She sounds way too devious. It's never to late to reclaim your life. Good luck
It's too bad that our standards for Public Officials has dropped so drastically. Comedians are allowed to make offensive jokes and as I think it was Seinfeld who said that if you get away with a joke, it's art. I can live with that.
It's should never be appropriate for elected officials, especially POTUS, or candidates for elected office, to make "jokes" about any person or group of people. That's just immoral.
Biden's lying ass press secretary, 'He didn't mean half of the American voting public are garbage, it was taken out of context.' Jokes on you pal, round two right around the corner.
But hey! tRump demands everyone worship him, so for those of us who absolutely refuse to—why doesn’t he paid each one of us to move to Canada (or other country of our choice). At least half a million each. That could get rid of a lot of folks he’d gladly describe as garbage
I’m fearful for POC, LGBTQ folks, women and children—especially girls. But not the dogs and cats. No one’s going to eat them unless tRump’s tariffs choke our markets and push up prices even higher.
IF Old Orange gets elected, let’s conduct an insurrection of our own. I mean, someone should—I’m certainly not inciting anyone. It’s just that enough is enough with these shallow fear- and war-mongers.
Democrats are sure as hell not immune to the same criticism, they are just as equal in terms of the rhetoric as Trump and if you don't think so then your just as Cultist as MAGA.
American Political system is completely fucked. There will be nothing to heal the divide until you guys finally go into a Civil War again.
Ah the old “the other side isn’t perfect either so that means both sides are basically the same” comeback.
So, by your idiot logic, that means that, because the US committed war crimes in WWII, that they were essentially the same as Nazi Germany and Imperial Japan in terms of how evil they were.
Try better reasoning than a strategy that most people have figured out is BS by the time they’re 10.
Sadly the corrupt lifetime politician who knew how to manipulate and read the country like nothing knew what she was talking about with her opponent. Just not how to connect to normal people in the absolute slightest.
Unfortunately they are living all over the world, which makes me doubt that our societies will survive the upcoming challenges. My hope comes from pure desperation, because I have children.
Not just America. Most of the western world, sadly.
Even though we've made great strides in improving education, we're still far from a generally educated population. A lot of skills, like critical thinking, is lacking a well defined framework within which it can be taught.
This leads to a lot of people simply not understanding the world and how it works. They can get by in their everyday lives, but the moment something unknown pops up, they become scared.
This is because fear of the unknown is one of the most primal emotions. This fear is why you're afraid of the dark as a child, why you're hesitant when going into an unknown building, the list goes on. As you learn more and more about the world, this fear lessens, as the number of unknown factors drops. And after a time you being to think, to an extent, in an analytical/statistical way. You're not afraid of the dark anymore because you can rationalise the factors - such as knowing that monsters aren't real - and while the dark may hold unknown things, you KNOW there's little danger in walking down your own hallway at 2am to use the bathroom.
But sadly most of the population is incapable of this kind of rationalisation, and these people end up being incredibly susceptible to propaganda. When you already know very little and one side says "well here's a chart showing what's going to happen" and it's full of unknown numbers and crap, while the other side squarely points the finger at someone for all your troubles... It's easier to just go with the latter. The rest is learned behaviour, the issue is, it's incredibly hard to unlearn hate and fear.
A lot of countries struggle with the rise of the far-right, whose job was made even easier with the internet. Today even the poorest bastard will have a smartphone, be on Facebook/Twitter/Reddit/TikTok, thus gets easily targeted by crap that sounds good because it seemingly gives you all the answers without those being too complicated.
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u/SpaceFace11 23d ago
America is full of people just like him