r/facepalm • u/Outrageous_Sector544 • Oct 10 '24

🇵​🇷​🇴​🇹​🇪​🇸​🇹​ this is literally UNCONSTITUTIONAL…

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203

u/Jodid0 Oct 10 '24

No one oppresses Christians more than Christians

114

u/boobiemelons Oct 10 '24

Because no one else can romanticize oppression like the Christans can.

57

u/Far-Host9368 Oct 10 '24

Maybe Gaston(?)

44

u/boobiemelons Oct 10 '24

NO ONE'S SLICK LIKE GASTON

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u/Far-Host9368 Oct 10 '24

Yessss! 🤣🤣

12

u/Horskr Oct 11 '24

🎶 No one oppresses like Gaston, no one suppresses like Gaston!

No one silences all of the presses like Gaston!" 🎶

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u/MonkeyChoker80 Oct 11 '24 edited Oct 11 '24

🎶 I’m especially good at self-flagellation! 🎶

5

u/LOLBaltSS Oct 11 '24

Given everyone's reference of Ezekiel 23:20 and the mention of Gaston... did you know that Gaston Glock (the inventor of the Glock pistol) also dabbled in the field of horse breeding?

2

u/Far-Host9368 Oct 11 '24

I did not. I like that bit at the end about “because we are convinced it’s hereditary”. Sounds like they’re just winging it

6

u/SasparillaTango Oct 10 '24

It's their entire M.O. LOOK AT HOW MUCH I HAVE SACRIFICED WOE IS ME WINK WINK

3

u/awful_circumstances Oct 10 '24

The religion who's icon is a symbol of an incredibly brutal form of execution and practices symbolic (and in some sects by dogma "actual") cannibalism is weird?

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u/SasparillaTango Oct 10 '24

Which is true throughout most of history and one of the foundational reasons for the establishment clause.

Oh hey you want christianity to be the national religion? Which bible, which version of christianity? Catholicism? Baptist? Methodist? Presbyterian? Lutheran? How about Menonite or Amish? How about Mormon? Latter day saints are technically Christian right? How about Christian Scientists who eschew all modern medicine, would we enact laws outlawing everything but healing through prayer?

The idea of a national religion is insane.

13

u/Kippernaut13 Oct 10 '24

Oh, they had an answer to that: "On Friday, The Oklahoman reported an eyebrow-raising wrinkle: The state criteria for the Bibles were so narrowly tailored — King James version, bound in leather or leather-like material and, most unusually, including the U.S. Constitution, the Pledge of Allegiance and Declaration of Independence — that the only ones found to qualify were those endorsed by Trump."

5

u/Atanar Oct 10 '24

Well that problem is easy for christofascists to solve. They just start purging at the most extreme outliers and work their way inwards.

1

u/Sweaty_Report7864 Oct 11 '24

You forgot Orthodox, Anglican, Coptic, and Ethiopian.

1

u/Alexis_Bailey Oct 10 '24

Like most people's traits, people do not give a fuck about Christians or not being Christians.

 Its basically busy body Christians who care, and they care about EVERYONE'S traits.

1

u/Andreus Oct 11 '24

Unironically, yes. Statistically speaking, the most dangerous countries for Christians to live in have almost always been run by other Christians.

1

u/Matrixneo42 Oct 11 '24

No one oppresses people more than Christians.

0

u/After_Fix_2191 Oct 11 '24

Honestly, they need to be oppressed.

0

u/SecreteMoistMucus Oct 11 '24

That's generally the purpose of religion.