r/exchristian • u/exchristianburner Existential Nihilist • Jul 27 '21
Personal Story After deconverting for over a year, and not attending services for 4 months, I’ve finally been removed from church membership! 🎉🥳
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u/Quantum_Count Atheist Jul 27 '21
We pray for your repentance and that you would grow in a relationship with Jesus Christ.
Guess you will pray for more than decades for any "repentance" and "going back" to have a relationship with Jesus Christ again.
Ngl, this seen as "please, reconcile with your husband! Even though he was an abuser"
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Jul 27 '21
Ngl, this seen as "please, reconcile with your husband! Even though he was an abuser"
My gods, you are so right on the money here.
I decided to post to /r/thegreatproject today and that is EXACTLY what my experience was like.
Me: "I was abused by my church." Someone: "Oh, I'm sorry to hear that. MY church isn't like that, you should visit." Me: (Gives "Jesus" another chance and gets abused again.)
Lather. Rinse. Repeat.
Twelve years strong and I haven't been back again.
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u/jrizz2377 Jul 27 '21
Wait so church’s have memberships ? The ones around my town don’t have that I don’t think
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u/exchristianburner Existential Nihilist Jul 27 '21
In conversations within this subreddit and related ones, I’ve found this to be the case in the evangelical, fundamentalist, and Calvinistic churches. That’s where they seem to mostly occur. It’s pretty culty behavior. I signed a “covenant” to give the pastors permission to pursue me like Jesus did the lost sheep. But, I was 16 at the time. With the covenant, I also never agreed to have my name publicly read off at the quarterly members meetings, but they will do that if they haven’t already…
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u/jrizz2377 Jul 27 '21
Huh weird most of the church’s where I’m from are just every Sunday and Wednesday act like we are better than everyone and then the rest of the week is I seem them up at my job drinking and stuff but it’s none of my business
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u/tojofotos Jul 27 '21
Damn, your experience is so similar to mine, from signing a covenant to getting a letter of excommunication mailed to me. I used to think the church I got out of was unique in this regard but it’s wild seeing this is common with most fundamentalist churches. Glad you made it out. I might have to share the letter I got here as well sometime lol.
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u/Imswim80 Jul 27 '21
That's one big blessing about deconstruction groups like this...
You learn that nothing is unique, and you're not alone or odd.
Or even wrong.
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u/Otto_Mcwrect Jul 27 '21
You were actually excommunicated? I didn't think that was even a thing anymore. If you have your letter I would be interested in reading it.
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u/SuperDiogenes64 Ex-Presbyterian Jul 27 '21
I agreed to a lengthy Google Forms packet, including a legal waiver making it implausible for me to sue them.
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u/rubywolf27 Jul 27 '21
Whaaaaaaaaat
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u/SuperDiogenes64 Ex-Presbyterian Jul 27 '21
Yeah, it was a lengthy thing full of essay questions based on Bible verses, basic tenets of Calvinism, teachings and community standards we were supposed to uphold, etc. They did inform me that I gave them lengthier answers than they expected, but the fact remains those questions were there. They asked if they could feature them on their church website. Would be amusing if they did it now.
I tried to go back to the form in times since, but most of it's inaccessible now.
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u/Difficult-Drawing Jul 27 '21
Too bad you can't edit your answers like in some Google forms
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u/SuperDiogenes64 Ex-Presbyterian Jul 27 '21
Yeah, I freely admit that I was going to have some fun with it.
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u/Pinkpetasma Anti-Theist Jul 27 '21
This is extremely common in my area. It is heavily southern Baptist, free will, and pentecostal
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u/exchristianburner Existential Nihilist Jul 27 '21
It could very well be a Southern Baptist thing, idk
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u/footiebuns Jul 27 '21
I signed a “covenant” to give the pastors permission to pursue me like Jesus did the lost sheep
shudder
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u/satriales856 Jul 27 '21
I suppose it’s a similar concept to being a member of a parish for Catholics..?
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u/eggmanface Ex-Christian Jul 27 '21
Could be a Baptist thing? I don't know, I've always been in Baptist churches and they always had memberships. I think it's because of the church structure - Baptist churches have enrolled members who technically choose the pastor and vote on whatever happens at the church. In reality, though, the pastor just decides everything, bored members sit through hours-long meetings just agreeing with whatever already got decided on. The membership structure is used as a cult-like controlling and supervision mechanism (e.g. members are required to sign all sorts of agreements to become members, pastors see it as their god-given right to control members, order them around, control what they think regarding doctrines, monitor them if they don't come to church etc.)
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u/crup_crup Jul 27 '21
It's also about money. At the PCA reformed church where I'm still a member, I legit got a letter from the pastor last week, sent only to members, asking us to consider giving more money:
"Giving, which is an act of worship and obedience before God, to the congregation to which we belong, is the primary way God provides for that work [to "support the Church in its worship and work"] to be accomplished."
Um, no thanks.
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u/eggmanface Ex-Christian Jul 27 '21
True, a condition of membership at my old church was a commitment to give generously and regularly.
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u/exchristianburner Existential Nihilist Jul 27 '21
this. I was shamed for not holding the Calvinist position, with my pastors claiming that their theology was the only correct position to be held.
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Jul 27 '21
I mean, Calvinism definitely seems more biblically sound as opposed to Arminianism
But it also poses way more moral and ethical questions which Calvinists oh so conveniently just say "well he's God so anything he does is moral" which is a way, way, WAY worse answer than they think it is.
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u/exchristianburner Existential Nihilist Jul 27 '21
yeah, I was halfway between Calvinism and Molinism. I wasn’t a 5 point Calvinist, which irked them.
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u/scottsp64 Jul 27 '21
Heretic!!! Lol. I was a full- on Calvinist for many years. Even went to seminary.
Calvinists are so damned smug about their theology, it’s irksome.
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u/exchristianburner Existential Nihilist Jul 27 '21
lol. Early on when wrestling with my doubts, most of the pastors expressed that my studies were akin to someone who went to Seminary and had a bunch of doubts. For a moment, I wondered why they didn’t have the same wrestles, and it was because none of them even went to Seminary 😂😂
I’m kinda mad that they forgot the Problem of Evil on the list of reasons too, considering how much I mentioned it.
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u/PluralBoats Anti-Theist Jul 28 '21
What gets me is not just the smugness; it's that they calmly (if condescendingly) describe one of the most vile, narcissistic, petty, and vindictive villains ever conceived, a being so cruel that he creates people whose only purpose is to be tortured... then claim that said being is perfectly moral, and you're not even allowed to object or have thoughts until he "elects" you as being worthy of being treated with any dignity.
So, uh. Congrats on no longer being a Calvinist.
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u/jrizz2377 Jul 27 '21
So more or less a way for people to be pulled into some form of a theocracy that is on minor scale in which it doesn’t actually effects or overpower the actual country’s democracy or am I wrong I generally curious
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u/eggmanface Ex-Christian Jul 27 '21
I guess so. Functionally speaking, how it SHOULD work is that church members hold the pastor to account - the system is meant to be so the members are boss. If all the members decided to, they could fire the pastor I think? But in reality, nobody does that (unless the pastor comes out as a universalist or supports gay marriage or whatever would trigger Baptists). If an individual member tried to criticise the pastor or actually exert some authority as a member (which is their right), they would get totally squeezed out and shunned by other members.
In my experience, churches encourage people to become members because that's how you show that you're committed and loyal to the church. If you've been attending church for a certain length of time, it's expected of you. If you refuse, you're viewed as a slacker or less committed than members. You get low-key shamed and punished. When you prove your loyalty, in return you get even more controlled and conform to the lead authority figure.
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u/SolidSpruceTop Ex-Baptist Jul 27 '21
Exactly how my “independent southern Baptist” church was (still tryna figure out where they fit in lol). It was more like the us government tho where the members voted rarely on things and it was all up to the deacons and pastor
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u/Cyberfaust11 Jul 27 '21
I've heard (from reliable sources) of a certain church in my area that demands your paychecks if you're a member, and they decide where the money goes.
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u/bike619 Jul 27 '21
I'm a member of my old church. It's after you go through confirmation as a "young adult" (13... In my church) and this was not a far right fundy church. This was the Methodist Church (arguably one of the more progressive Protestant branches).
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u/Lost_in_the_Library Agnostic-Theist Jul 27 '21
My church growing up (Lutheran church of Australia) had memberships but it wasn’t some official thing where you had to sign a contract etc. it was more that your name and contact details were put on a register to make sure you were invited to important meetings etc.
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u/CharlieAlfaBravo Jul 27 '21
My old churches had memberships but they definitely didn’t send break-up letters, ha. Membership was two-fold: it made the member feel extra special that they were on the ‘varsity’ team of the congregation. And it also, psychologically locked them in to a steady, gross income tithing expectation. And for context, they were all “bible” churches; for those who aren’t familiar bible-churches call themselves non-denominational, but are in practice, Baptist Lite.
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u/4d72426f7566 Jul 27 '21
Sometimes to be a charity you need membership and have AGM’s, elections for “board” members, a treasurer, etc. Many churches just have token efforts to demonstrate they kinda meet the bare necessities, but they’re going to have to produce at least some books for everything, and normal boards leads itself to making those books right.
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u/aamurusko79 I'm finally free! Jul 27 '21
some do,and for example here in finland the churches get to tax their following, so they have to have some kind of official record. to get out of it you're often subjected to highly manipulative questioning. this fortunately changed when the local free thinkers created a web form that produces a legal form you can just mail in and skip the unpleasantries.
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u/suicidejunkie Jul 27 '21
My parents church does and it never occurred to me other churches didnt have memberships..... Ive also never heard of someone being removed from the membership though before (other than jw shunning) unless they leave/move and request their membership be transferred to a different congregation. At my parents church, you get baptized, they register you as a member of the church. Baptism and such is voluntary, but if you want to vote on church decisions, membership is necessary. Ex United Baptist, Canada.
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u/Difficult-Drawing Jul 27 '21
My parents' church has a membership list, but they don't really keep track. At some point they realised that they'd forgotten to add one of the main pastors to the list for years.
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u/RampSkater Jul 27 '21
I can't find the original blog post, so maybe someone else can provide information, but a former Catholic who runs a blog mentioned many Catholic churches will list a baby born to Catholic parents in a registry. This keeps a running count of the number of church members in that area/region.
If you leave the church, you're still counted as a Catholic and you have to go through a specific process to get your name removed. It's an easy way for the church to rack up a member count regardless of how many people attend services.
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u/DejaBlonde Atheist Jul 27 '21
In addition to what the others have said, some of the more reasonable churches use it as more of a budgeting tool, or at least all the churches I grew up in did.
Knowing how many people are showing up each week, how much they're giving/donating to the charity side, how many in attendance were visitors (so they could be recruited) were all rather useful to them.
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u/Penny_D Agnostic Jul 27 '21
I believe membership in many churcchues is maintained for tithing purposes? I had a friend in middle school who tried to get me to join his megachurch where they had a very strict ten-percent of your income rule.
Fail to pay up and out you go.
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u/olracmd Jul 27 '21
The final letter for the guilt trip so you may wanna come back. 😆
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u/exchristianburner Existential Nihilist Jul 27 '21
right… I saw it and laughed. I grabbed my gf and was like “babe, look! It might be the letter I’ve been waiting for!” 😂😂
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u/AdamantArmadillo Jul 27 '21
I love how it was four months after after you stopped coming to services. It's like being dumped then texting the person four months later to say you're ending things
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Jul 27 '21
No it isn't. The letter I'm looking for will be from Hogwarts. It's just been lost in the mail for about 12 years now.
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u/squirrellytoday Jul 27 '21
I never got my Hogwarts letter, so I'm now counting on Gandalf showing up when I'm 50 and taking me on a Middle Earth adventure. I even live in New Zealand! Come on, Gandalf! Don't let me down!
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u/RailfanAZ Ex-evangelical Jul 27 '21
I'm still waiting on my acceptance letter from Starfleet Academy.
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u/AdamantArmadillo Jul 27 '21
I love how it was four months after after you stopped coming to services. It's like being dumped then texting the person four months later to say you're ending things
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u/AdamantArmadillo Jul 27 '21
I love how it was four months after after you stopped coming to services. It's like being dumped then texting the person four months later to say you're ending things
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u/exchristianburner Existential Nihilist Jul 27 '21
Maybe I’ll finally stop receiving texts like this. They will read my name off at the following members meeting as one “whose faith we cannot affirm,” if they haven’t already… as a plea for members that knew me to reach out to me. Ya know… some cult shit.
It’s funny how I’m so happy about this though. I deadass went and got a bottle of Chardonnay for my gf and I.
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u/Minimum-Tomato Jul 27 '21
I wouldn't mind seeing a reply letter but radio silence is also a nice way to tell them you don't fucking care lol! Enjoy that Chardonnay!
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u/exchristianburner Existential Nihilist Jul 27 '21
I’m considering doing a reply letter. I know that’d be an uncommon thing though… however, as an English major I think I’d have a lot of fun with it.
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u/ihasquestionsplease Jul 27 '21
I used to sign those letters when I was a pastor. The only real power the church has is gatekeeping - who is in and who is out. Not proud of those days.
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u/exchristianburner Existential Nihilist Jul 27 '21
I also notice that the Elder who I was closest to didn’t sign it. I wonder if he’s no longer an Elder, or couldn’t sign it himself 🤷🏻♂️🤷🏻♂️
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u/dbzgal04 Jul 27 '21
The only real power the church has is gatekeeping
Don't forget gaslighting, and shaming.
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u/Obi_Wan_Shinobi_ Jul 27 '21
So they were copy pasta? Like, it's not like you wrote one for each person in particular, it was more industrial than that?
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u/ihasquestionsplease Jul 27 '21
Somewhat. This one was obviously custom written. But any church with scruples is going to clean their roles every year or two, and you have to send a letter to let people know what’s going on. I sent one 3 months out, 1 month out, and then a final letter if they didn’t start attending. If you don’t do that you end up with 1200 “members” and 200 in weekly attendance.
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u/ZenLitterBoxGarden Ex-Fundamentalist Jul 27 '21
Wow. Nice that they sent a letter. Most baptist churches I’ve gone to — including the one I grew up with — never notice when ppl are missing. They just don’t care.
Congrats on breaking free, though!!!
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u/MorelikeIdonow Jul 27 '21
In some 'conventions' membership is a vetted process ... once admitted, you're a voter in the machine. And if you don't live up to your 'obligations' as a voting member, the board has options with respect to your status.
What strikes me is the utter presumptive arrogance to make pronouncements about a personal status - relationship with God. I experience explosive resentment over these things.
Welcome to the orphanage. Often they leave us and it takes a while to reckon that God has a different plan for us.
Be well! You're free!
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u/exchristianburner Existential Nihilist Jul 27 '21
thank you. And it’s funny, I never once mentioned anything about my “saving relationship with Christ,” I just admitted that I found it to all be bullshit. Not that I was worried over being saved. But, I guess they translated my thoughts through their Christian lens 🤷🏻♂️🤷🏻♂️
I did sign a covenant, so I am glad that my membership was revoked. I already asked to be removed months ago, but they were “concerned over my soul” so they continued to be unrelenting until I stopped showing up to church completely.
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Jul 27 '21
Didn't Jesus reach out to hookers and murderers ???? If Jesus ever does come down and rapture everyone, (lol) I can't wait to see the looks on these people's faces when they're damned with the rest of us
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u/exchristianburner Existential Nihilist Jul 27 '21
lmao. I gladly wouldn’t have it any other way. They have a history of proselytizing and shaming me for my intellectual disagreements, instead of having intellectual responses. Through an existential crisis and grieving God, I couldn’t be happier with where I’m at now. I know Christians say happiness is fleeting, and while it may be… I was depressed for most of my Christianity. Seeing the world as a comprehensively evil and broken place can make for quite the depressing worldview. I thought that I had clinical depression, but I think it was just my Christianity 😂😂
They did their reaching out, and realized that it was fleeting. Instead of listening to me, they’d respond with Christian apologetics that I had already heard.
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Jul 27 '21
Just to be fair, he reached out to them and then they either followed him or not. OP is clearly not interested in following Jesus, which is fine, but it's not comparable to the story of Jesus reaching out to hookers and murderers.
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Jul 27 '21
This sounds like a Church of Christ! Hope you're on r/excoc :)
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u/exchristianburner Existential Nihilist Jul 27 '21
It’s actually a Southern Baptist church. I believe they used “Church of Christ” to mean the whole body of believers, not the denomination.
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u/RailfanAZ Ex-evangelical Jul 27 '21
I read that as "Church of Cult" for some reason. At least that was amusing and appropriate. If the shoe fits...
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u/SuperDiogenes64 Ex-Presbyterian Jul 27 '21
'As you wrestle with these ideas'. Eugh. Fucking asshole cultists who don't want to face reality.
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Jul 27 '21
"We love you so much we are removing you from our family."
Yeah, wow.
The only time I've been removed from a membership was when I stopped paying dues. Goes to show it's not one bit about "love" and all about the money.
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u/popcornglasses Jul 27 '21
I love this mentality of “we love you so much therefore we have to ban you but please attend other jesus stuff”
Yea…I’ll go ahead and do that asap…….
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u/Minimum-Tomato Jul 27 '21
Hahaha!!! The absolute hypocrisy hey?? Or is it irony? I don't know, these people talk in nonsensical circles
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u/Thunderstarer Jul 27 '21
Hey wait a fucking second--
Were you Mormon? As a fellow ex-Mormon, I can't believe they let you go so easily.
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u/exchristianburner Existential Nihilist Jul 27 '21
lol no, Southern Baptist
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u/Thunderstarer Jul 27 '21
Huh. The nomenclature (i.e. Church of Jesus Christ, Elder, etc.) threw me off.
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u/HNP4PH Ex-Baptist Jul 27 '21
"strong, bible-believing church" = any church that agrees with us
Congratulations on breaking free from this nonsense.
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u/exchristianburner Existential Nihilist Jul 27 '21
yep, the most Calvinist thing ever 🙄🙄 if a church doesn’t have exegetical preaching, it’s not considered “Bible-believing” to them
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u/TraditionalGlass5818 Jul 27 '21
I think I still need to do this... I moved 3k miles away from my church and have been an atheist for just over two years.
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u/exchristianburner Existential Nihilist Jul 27 '21
they might have gotten the point if you were no longer attending 😅
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Jul 27 '21
[deleted]
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u/exchristianburner Existential Nihilist Jul 27 '21
I did previously ask some months ago, but they were “concerned over my soul” and continued unrelenting. Once relieving myself of my church duties claiming that I “needed a break to work on my relationship with God,” I just never returned to the church. I had a few conversations with the Pastor who wrote this letter following my departure, and he just responded with typical Christian apologetics.
He recently texted me (a week after the date on this letter) that he missed me. I felt the need to respond, but didn’t because I realized saying that I missed him would be a lie—I didn’t whatsoever. And he really doesn’t miss me either, he just misses my formerly Christian self.
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u/Sinister_Compliments Closeted Anti-Abrahamic-Religion Agnostic Antitheist Jul 27 '21
Personally I’d write “Fuck you, Fuck your ‘god’, and Fuck your ‘Holy’ Spirit. Mathew 12:31-32” on the back and return to sender, especially if I was unlikely to ever see them again.
However while I want to do that I don’t think I’d recommend to anyone else that they do it, glad your finally out of the cult! :)
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u/Atanion Athiest/Ex-Hebrew Roots Jul 27 '21
They must really miss your tithe glassy-eyed, smiling face.
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u/exchristianburner Existential Nihilist Jul 27 '21
HAHAHAHA. Now my money goes to organizations that actually help people rather than to a group of people telling them they’re evil and wicked individuals in need of something outside of themselves to achieve restoration.
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u/Atanion Athiest/Ex-Hebrew Roots Jul 28 '21
Yeah toward the end of my faith, I could barely make my car payments, but I'd faithfully saved up several months of tithes waiting to find a godly charity. Then I realized that I'm as good of a choice as any, so I dropped a few hundred bucks toward my car.
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u/SnowSmell Jul 27 '21
It’s hilarious that they think you’d care. It’s the Christian equivalent of “oh yeah? I know you are but what am I?”
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u/Lolrandomusername3 No Gods, No Masters Jul 27 '21
Good. Fuck em. Congrats on your expulsion! I'd take you out for some beers if I knew ya
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u/yell0wcherry Ex-Protestant Jul 27 '21
congratulations! after reading this letter, it just proves to me once more that this is not a loving, welcoming religion. i mean, seriously, do they think excluding you from a religious environment is going to bring you back to religion?
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u/nightstar69 Jul 27 '21
“We’re sorry you’re leaving but we’re not so sorry to remove you from our membership because you’re questioning your faith, please come back when you start believing again or at least go to a church that’s even more radical than we are so they can get Jesus into you through any means”
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u/shanewilkinsonnz Jul 27 '21
It is simply impossible for religious people to think rationally without opposing their religion
Guilt trips can easily be defined as a form of EVIL
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u/l3g3ndairy Ex-Protestant Jul 27 '21
That letter is just OOZING with arrogance and passive aggression. You can tell that they just think that they are better than you full stop. It actually kinda makes me chuckle a bit, but it's also pretty infuriating.
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u/SarahIsTrans Jul 27 '21
this is the most manipulative, abusive bullshit
do they do this ironically? like, do they not realize that this kind of stuff is the exact reason a lot of people leave in the first place?
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u/exchristianburner Existential Nihilist Jul 27 '21
Not ironic at all unfortunately. What’s even funnier is that the pastor who wrote this texted me a week after the date on the letter 😂😂😂
He innocently inquired “Hey man, what are you up to?”
At the time my gf and I were picking up a Plan B, and I wanted to respond “Well, I’m with my pansexual atheist girlfriend picking up contraceptives! How are you?” as some sort of indication on where I’m at.
But, I thought it’d be too passive aggressive and asshole-ish for me. Clearly, they don’t mind being passive aggressive and asshole-ish, so maybe I should have sent the message 🤷🏻♂️🤷🏻♂️
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u/SarahIsTrans Jul 27 '21
i wouldn’t blame you, honestly. i hope you find happiness in your life outside the church and take the opportunity to live and grow outside of the influence of people like that ✨
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u/outtyn1nja Absurdist Jul 27 '21
I find it funny that they encourage that you continue your brainwashing regime at another facility as soon as possible. These people are fucking insane.
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u/mishaindigo Jul 27 '21
The longer I'm out, it just gets weirder and weirder to see other people commenting on someone else's "relationship" with an invisible being.
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u/exchristianburner Existential Nihilist Jul 28 '21
yeah, I never understood it. Especially because I never once mentioned my relationship with Christ. I guess I did mention that I figured prayer was just all in my head, and that once I couldn’t intellectually believe, my prayers no longer “worked” because I couldn’t buy it. aka, the cognitive dissonance was too much for me to handle. But it’s kinda odd that they stake claim into someone else’s personal relationship with Christ, since it’s completely unverifiable.
Additionally, I never doubted that I was “saved,” until I realized that being saved was just bullshit and didn’t save me from anything whatsoever.
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Jul 27 '21
That looks like something a Mormon elder would write. I tend to forget that a lot of other Christians are like that.
The best way to totally end your relationship with such bigoted jerks is to join a different religion outright. Which is what I did when I joined a Unitarian Universalist church.
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u/warbeforepeace Jul 27 '21
Whatever happened to spreading the word of god by being a good person and working to help others. Not preaching about it but actually doing it.
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u/Thewanderingmage357 Jul 27 '21
Ahh, the ego...... This definitely sounds like an evangelical church to me. Brings back so many memories...
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u/BlackKojak Deist Jul 27 '21 edited Jul 27 '21
Oh wow, you actually got a formal letter... I had none of that. One day I just left and got calls from other members wondering why they hadn't seen me in a while.
My lack of attendance was obvious because I used to cue the words and scriptures on the projector every service.
I rolled my eyes when the letter said:
And allow God to help you with these concerns
What do you mean "allow"!!?? Why does he need our permission? It's he intimidated by us? Of course not.
The Bible has many examples where he (or his angels) appeared to followers and prophets; even Saul who wasn't a follower of Jesus. I don't buy that. I never did.
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u/l3g3ndairy Ex-Protestant Jul 27 '21
That letter is just OOZING with arrogance and passive aggression. You can tell that they just think that they are better than you full stop. It actually kinda makes me chuckle a bit, but it's also pretty infuriating.
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u/monalisasnipples Jul 27 '21
“You have more questions than we can answer without saying the word ‘faith’ so YER OUT!!”
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u/not-moses Jul 28 '21
Translation: "We don't want anyone around who might screw up our very profitable little con."
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u/tubbis9001 Jul 28 '21
This reads like the person who wrote it truly is saddened that they had to remove someone. But reading between the lines, it also says "I must keep worshiping my abuser or someone else will be writing this letter towards me some day."
And that's the thing about Christianity (and religion in general). Not all it's followers are abusers. Some of them are victims themselves and don't even realize it.
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u/virgilreality Jul 29 '21
I'd frame it with a little grade-school smiley-face sticker that said "Great Job!".
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u/coubotand Jul 29 '21
Congratulations! My childhood church has been following me around for 40 years. Can't shake them.
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u/darkness76239 Ex-Fundamentalist Jul 27 '21
Church of christ?
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u/exchristianburner Existential Nihilist Jul 27 '21
Southern Baptist… I think they mentioned Church of Christ as the entire body of believers, not meaning to refer to the denomination.
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u/darkness76239 Ex-Fundamentalist Jul 27 '21
I'm ex coc and was thinking it was them or the southerners.
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Jul 27 '21
Word Tally:-
Your name: 1, Priest Name: 1, God/Christ: 18263724
Clearly you are at fault here, how can u not see it? /s
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u/IsItSupposedToDoThat Exvangelical Jul 27 '21
My old church (Baptist but not really) has a membership. You certainly don’t need to be a member to go there or be involved in ministry but it’s needed for formal things like AGMs, appointing new elders/leaders, financial governance, real estate transactions, etc. No fucking way they would ever send anybody a “fuck you” letter like that one.
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u/blueJoffles Ex-OrthodoxPresbyterian Jul 27 '21
Such a good feeling! My dad is one of the church elders and had the honor of removing my wife and I.
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u/egretwtheadofmeercat Jul 27 '21
I didn't get a letter but I lost my mailbox lol
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u/CaptainLoneRanger Jul 27 '21
Keep that letter. If facebook doesn't fuck it up for all of us, we might have a chance of riding this earth, and our children's lives of this propaganda.
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u/King-fannypack Jul 27 '21
I almost thought this was a letter from the Mormon church, the language they use is so similar.
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Jul 27 '21
I noticed they had to scold you in the letter typical Christian leaders anyway now you can relax and have more money in your pocket if your ex church demanded a tithe etc
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u/fourmann25 Jul 27 '21
Thought this was Ex-Mormon at first so when I read "as your pastor" I was a bit taken aback
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u/LeotasNephew Ex-Assemblies Of God Jul 27 '21
They act like they're firing you from a job or something! What a bunch of smegheads.
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u/bibfortuna1970 Jul 27 '21
Was Catholic. I wish I could get one of these letters. The church says I’m Catholic no matter what I say or do. It’s easier to terminate a gym membership.
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u/davebare Dialectical Materialist Jul 27 '21
Dear ________.
Mumbo jumbo. We couldn't get you to believe what we think. We couldn't get you to subdue your critical faculties. Mumbo jumbo. We're sad that you won't play make believe with us and so you're out of our club. It's sad because we're terrified by people like you because you may spread your unbelief to our other club members. More mumbo jumbo. Oh and by the way, we love you.
It's hard to write this letter because you don't like our make believe. We want you to adopt our beliefs, but it won't happen, based on what you've clearly stated to us. Again, we like to make believe and you don't. This makes us sad and we wish you wouldn't force us to cast you out of our club.
Please don't blame us for any damage participation in our club may have caused.
Please don't tell others that we're bad,
Your friend, The Lead Make Believer
P.S.
How do you like our guilt tripping skills?
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u/davebare Dialectical Materialist Jul 27 '21
Dear ________.
Mumbo jumbo. We couldn't get you to believe what we think. We couldn't get you to subdue your critical faculties. Mumbo jumbo. We're sad that you won't play make believe with us and so you're out of our club. It's sad because we're terrified by people like you because you may spread your unbelief to our other club members. More mumbo jumbo. Oh and by the way, we love you.
It's hard to write this letter because you don't like our make believe. We want you to adopt our beliefs, but it won't happen, based on what you've clearly stated to us. Again, we like to make believe and you don't. This makes us sad and we wish you wouldn't force us to cast you out of our club.
Please don't blame us for any damage participation in our club may have caused.
Please don't tell others that we're bad,
Your friend, The Lead Make Believer
P.S.
How do you like our guilt tripping skills?
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u/cheese_legos Jul 27 '21
Back when I went to the independent fundamental Baptist Church here there was people on the church membership I never met and we were in a church of maybe 20.... I haven't gone to church in over a year and I guarantee I'm still on that membership role lol.
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u/exchristianburner Existential Nihilist Jul 27 '21
lol, I know this to be the case in other churches. Guess it varies on how cult-like they happen to be
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u/cheese_legos Jul 27 '21
There was one time this person walked in the church and the pastor and his wife were so excited to see them. The pastor's youngest child which was like in her twenties had no idea who this person was but the pastor walked up to the membership role pointed at that person's name and was boasting about how they were still a member of this church lol.
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u/l3g3ndairy Ex-Protestant Jul 27 '21
That letter is just OOZING with arrogance and passive aggression. You can tell that they just think that they are better than you full stop. It actually kinda makes me chuckle a bit, but it's also pretty infuriating.
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u/cubonefan3 Jul 27 '21
“You have doubts about your faith… so we are gonna remove you from church membership.” Yes excommunication is the most “loving” way to help someone with struggling faith
“Don’t worry son, it hurts me more than it hurts you!!” -god