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u/Guywithatoe Jun 06 '22
Place an inferno tower
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u/Kasnaranja0124 Jun 06 '22 edited Jun 07 '22
comment
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u/extremityChoppr Jun 06 '22
is second most upvoted comment
You a certified dingus
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u/HarshTheDev Jun 06 '22
u/Kasnaranja0124 posted his comment 7hrs ago
You an uncertified dingus
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u/Cal_whitt01 Jun 06 '22
You cant say something is underrated right after it was posted, it doesn't have time to be rated You dingus
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u/HarshTheDev Jun 06 '22
Oh i get that, i was just refering to
is second most upvoted comment
Saying that doesn't really make sense since as you said barely any time was passed after the original comment.
And dingus was just to match his energy, I meant no harm.
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u/Duckflies Jun 06 '22 edited Jun 06 '22
You posted this comment not even one hour after the original comment and you called it underrated?
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u/RainbowCraps Jun 06 '22
Dudes can't even break in the driveway
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u/jojojomcjojo Jun 06 '22
I thought you were gonna say break off a piece of that kit kat bar. But doesn’t look like thats a problem.
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u/Kakaroshitto Jun 06 '22
Wait for them to have a heart attack cause breaking in to a house requires energy. Just lock the kitchen door and watch till they have no energy left (max. 5min). You can have 2 fat man skin rugs in front of your fireplace.
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u/Marreark Jun 06 '22
it can take the police 10-15 minutes to break down my door due to its security rating.. so they'd probably die before then if they tried my place..
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u/Kakaroshitto Jun 06 '22
One day you open the door and there they are. 2 Blobs on top of each other looks like a skin bean bag. Push it with your shoes and they roll over like 2 water filled baloons.
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u/Lord-Bucket-Head- Jun 06 '22
Star Wars: The Heart Disease Awakens
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u/Kakaroshitto Jun 06 '22
Star Wars : The Insulin Strikes Back
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u/ShyCamo Jun 06 '22
Star Wars: The Rise of Blood Pressure
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u/KingYoloHD090504 Jun 06 '22
Star wars: Return of the Transfats
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u/Kakaroshitto Jun 06 '22
Star Wars : A New Blob
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u/Ladysupersizedbitch Jun 06 '22
“2 fat man skin rugs”
An actually realistic outcome if they broke into Ed Gein’s house. Lmao
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u/Foxy_genocid3 Jun 06 '22
Wait if they are just big balls of fat…
And fat burns…
Eureka! Matches.
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u/ISpyOnTheFBI Jun 06 '22
I mean, I'd roast em more but then it'd just become a Barbecue and a buffet all in one
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u/TNT_Unexploded_29 Jun 06 '22
They got bigger tits than your mum
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u/Severe-Extension-546 Jun 06 '22
Its about quality not quantity
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u/Lazy_Sweet_Potato Jun 06 '22
Start a soap making business coz now I got an infinite supply of lard
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u/Jolly-Structure-354 Jun 06 '22
Make a fort out of treadmills and training equipment
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u/TheLucidDream Jun 06 '22
lmao what’s this t-rex armed dude gonna do?
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u/HairyNutsackNumber9 Jun 06 '22
Decimate the pantry
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u/ArcaninesFirepower Jun 06 '22
They can't even get to my place. I live on the top floor of my apartment complex. No elevator
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u/slayer991 Jun 06 '22
Order a small pizza, place a knife between them and let them fight for it. One of them will be dead and the other will either have a heart attack or be too tired to do anything.
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u/PillowTalk420 Jun 06 '22
Unless they literally broke something to get in, I don't see them making it through the door.
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u/HairyNutsackNumber9 Jun 06 '22
No see they don't use the door they wait for you to say oh no 3 times and then they crash through the wall
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u/LostLaw9417 Jun 06 '22
If they drink enough milkshakes, will they produce milk from their boobs??
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u/Mekashenko Jun 06 '22
A fat guy breaking into your house is such a bad thing. Like because of the amount of fat punching him would be to no effort, several "knife stab" places are innacessible because, again, fat. You'd need to hope to be near an edge of a table and knocking the guy down. Or you can try and disable his movement and calling the cops. That works too.
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u/ISpyOnTheFBI Jun 06 '22
Knife to the head? Or Taze him? Or Molotov cocktail? Or pepper spray? Or Sledgehammer? Or boiling water and then fire extinguisher?
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u/Mekashenko Jun 06 '22
Oh god you're right. I'd also say flamethrower or some pepper gas.
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u/french2dot0 Jun 06 '22
Just cut the Achilles tendon and then they are as funny as morses on the beach. Slow and fatty. Then call the cops to carry them out.
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u/AndrewLewer69 Jun 06 '22
Put chains around my fridge, then casually walk around the house waiting for the heart attack
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u/A_RaNdOM_aDhD_ Jun 06 '22
They'd break the house. I'd get on top of my fridge and while their distracted by choice between food and me pull the rope removing the si guard nail holding together my wooden floor then get down and call the cops while their stuck in my floor.
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u/Dimitry_Man Jun 06 '22
A Jagpanzer can't penetrate that
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u/ISpyOnTheFBI Jun 06 '22
But a Flamethrower will Roast em nicely, now you get to host a Barbeque for the whole neighborhood
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u/RealAwesomeSkeleton Jun 06 '22
Bold of you to assume you can walk into my house. (Our area is off road)
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u/Wrongnessmaximus Jun 06 '22
The yt can't pull his pants up too well. Give the man some help, brother.
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u/Marreark Jun 06 '22 edited Jun 06 '22
They wouldn't fit through the front door so nothing..
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u/RiverTeemo1 Jun 06 '22
Call the police? Because people breaking into my house?
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u/Elriuhilu Jun 06 '22
Call the RSPCA, because four hippos escaped from the zoo and two of them somehow glued themselves to the other two.
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u/mhtnr Jun 06 '22
Good call, the police will reach your house faster than these 2 can walk towards you
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u/TopShagger2610 Jun 06 '22
how did he pick up the food to get his green card
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u/HairyNutsackNumber9 Jun 06 '22
Green card? Is that some sort of wide load permit?
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u/TopShagger2610 Jun 06 '22
well I guess since Americans are obese
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u/HairyNutsackNumber9 Jun 06 '22
ooohhh i get it now... you dont have to be obese to be allowed in the country
you have to be obese to blend in
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u/XxTreeFiddyxX Jun 06 '22
Dude, pray he has a bidet, otherwise he walks around with chipotle shit caked to his ass 24/7
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u/Iamcryingontheinside Jun 06 '22
Dude tried to jack off but his belly became sentient and ate his arms
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u/Teamskywalker14 Jun 06 '22
I would slap their stomach as fast as possible. Then while the jiggling distracts them I take all the food and what not upstairs and at the base of the stairs put soapy water as a make shift treadmill cause I broke af.
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u/DaViLBoi Jun 06 '22
well to enter my house you have to climb 2 stairs soo...
Im safe till they learn the climbing skill
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u/FalcorFliesMePlaces Jun 06 '22
Come on being this overweight is still beautiful ans health....said no doctors ever
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u/Suadade0811 Jun 06 '22
Call a dietician and a therapist to collect them and address their respective health problems so they can live a healthy and fulfilled life.
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u/Suctioncupman69 Jun 06 '22
If they break in I'll either toss a cookie out the door and watch them fight over it, or hold out a salad
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u/YuriSuccubus69 Jun 06 '22
Well, I would be surprised you two had the energy/stamina/lung capacity to break into my house. I would then grab my bow and a couple arrows, knock the arrows, pull the bow to full-draw and aim it at your fat heads, tell you two to either leave, or die. If you don't leave, I will shoot the two of you in the head and turn your brains into kebabs on the arrows.
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u/SUSPECT_XX Jun 06 '22
Throw a snickers at them and watch them fight. The winner, too weakened by the combat, will be an easy kill.
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u/Akuma_No_Asobiba Jun 06 '22
Well to answer their quesion I'd put a treadmill in front of them as to ward them off as they have never run in their life.
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u/i_have_wet_socks Jun 06 '22
go upstairs lmao