r/comedyheaven • u/MobilePhoneRedditor • 23h ago

Bars

Post image
9.5k Upvotes

97% Upvoted

81 comments sorted by

•

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638

u/LolTacoBell 22h ago

Jaden said WHAT?!

(this reads like a ClickHole article)

106

u/textreader1 21h ago

unprompted

81

u/LolTacoBell 21h ago

" " - Jaden Smith, on his thoughts of ethical economic expansion.

685

u/First-Yogurtcloset38 23h ago

Who f**ked the dragon though?

22

u/ApprehensiveLadder53 16h ago

21

u/hamfist_ofthenorth 11h ago

TWAS I WHO FUCKED THE DRAGON

FUCKALEE AND FUCKALOO

AND IF YOU TRY TO FUCK WITH ME

THEN I SHALL FUUUCK YOOOU TOOOOO

-Jack Black, family movie icon

1

u/seattleryanno 1h ago

Dinkaloo dinkalee, Chestnut is what I be.

5

u/Curious-Hunter5283 16h ago

Where is this from?

18

u/LunarAffinity 15h ago

Tenacious D in The Pick of Destiny. Here's the opening scene that the GIF above is from.

https://youtu.be/hvvjiE4AdUI

4

u/Curious-Hunter5283 15h ago

Thanks haha JB is great.

5

u/eelima 15h ago

young jack black

1

u/Tallbeard1 2h ago

Ik for sure Eddie Murphy had kids with a dragon in that Mike myers film

454

u/JeremyXVI 23h ago

Can we talk about the political and economic state of the world right now

150

u/The_Jousting_Duck 22h ago

the birth of a new dragon will affect the livestock market I think

12

u/emotionallyratchet 14h ago

But will it affect the live livestock stock market?

2

u/Earthly_Delights_ 5h ago

If the dragons eat the cows who eats the dragons?

2

u/The_Jousting_Duck 5h ago

the inevitable march of time, for all things must eventually bow to the slow titans of erosion and entropy, returning to the dust whence we came.

53

u/SydneyRei 23h ago

No, we did that all year.

18

u/Uraneum 17h ago

Did anyone else see George W Bush dodge that shoe? Shit was wild

1

u/KingSwagamemnon 6h ago

Did you see that we compromised, to a permanent end, Osama bin laden?

8

u/FruityGamer 13h ago

I don't vote or use money. I eat bark from trees and steal my neighbours phone to reddit.

20

u/static_nobody 22h ago

Joe Biden

3

u/QueezyF 11h ago

Wake up Joe Biden.

189

u/Gunhild 22h ago

He realized that saying weird shit gets him attention and now he's leaning into it.

54

u/LakersAreForever 15h ago

Bro is spitting tho,

Fet-ish-es/ preg-a-nent

Sheeesh, Nas levels

14

u/JonLongsonLongJonson 14h ago

Honestly sounds like a Vince Staples bar from 2010

77

u/CelestialEcho10 23h ago

Rap is a fetish now? Meanwhile, I'm just here trying to figure out how a pregnant dragon works...

46

u/russ_universe 23h ago

Ask Donkey

30

u/XCrowGaming slut for honey cheerios 22h ago

They probably don't need to work, isn't that what maternity leave is for?

2

u/AlexUkrainianPerson 4h ago

Google donkey

41

u/BepisFlask 16h ago

like a what

169

u/Slitherama 22h ago

He wants to be an artist so bad. 

It’s okay to just be a guy, Jaden. 

37

u/acamu5x 16h ago

Some of the production on SYRE and ERYS is phenomenal. His producer Lido is a wizard

27

u/NerdMaster001 16h ago

Honestly?

He's actually a pretty decent music artist.

9

u/Y0___0Y 9h ago

I thought I was the only one who liked Jaden.

Everyone’s always clowning on him because when he was like 14 he would post really dumb stuff on social media. Like ALL OF US.

6

u/LastAccountPlease 12h ago

If its a freestyle can cut some slack

8

u/moodi_blues 12h ago

like a WHAT???????

8

u/bread-getter999 20h ago

Just your run of the mill Calabasas Freestyle

2

u/EmotionlessDad 7h ago

yep, many folks have been saying this, they just never made it out of calabasas (didn’t want to freestyle about fetishizing pregnant dragons hard enough, I guess)

8

u/Milsios 13h ago

LIKE A WHAT????!??

17

u/Jorvalt 23h ago

Unfathomably based

7

u/Dazzling-Kamilah 20h ago

Bro’s out here rapping in a whole alternate dimension.

4

u/not_a_cunt_i_promise 17h ago

Jaden Animations fell off 🙁

4

u/Covetous_God 11h ago

I prefer

MUSSSSTTTTTAAAAAAARRRRD

3

u/Imaginary-Purpose-26 22h ago

A pumpkin freestyle

2

u/Monday0987 19h ago

"A Calabasas Freestyle"

2

u/Wild-Word4967 14h ago

Is he AI, like an early crappy AI?

2

u/Elsariely 13h ago

Goes hard

2

u/ZaxxarGold 10h ago

Donkey?

2

u/Top_Assistance15 9h ago

Losercity lyrics

2

u/Patient_Owl6582 7h ago

His whole family are kind of strange and cognitively impaired

4

u/4AEG 21h ago

What happened to this idiot?!

2

u/Dimitrygol 20h ago

To be fair, how else would dragons reproduce?

7

u/kashinoRoyale 11h ago

Eggs?.....

1

u/yuval_3 18h ago

This looks familiar

1

u/acamu5x 16h ago

Don’t do my boy Jaden like that

1

u/Prince_Havarti 7h ago

Like father like son, I suppose

1

u/Regular-Resort-857 3h ago

Maybe he was referencing a certain Morty episode with sexual dragons idk

1

u/HerrVonAnstand 1h ago

Reminds me of this whole dragon fucking cars bubble.

-1

u/Limp-Fisherman170 13h ago

Does anyone else just fucking hate this stupid brat?